Ron concentrated.
Snape was fishing for a memory in Ron's mind. Ron was trying for the first time to block Snape from all memories. Snape had told him to simply think of nothing. But it was almost impossible to think of nothing. Ron instead tried to divert Snape to memories that didn't matter–de-gnoming with his brothers, doing homework in the common room–Snape had suggested this early in their training. It would make projecting false memories much easier when the time came.
He resorted to just forcing Snape out of his head. It always seemed to work, even if Snape insisted that it wasn't a subtle enough method.
Ron collapsed onto the floor of the practice room and quickly sat up, prepared for a second attack, but Snape didn't give one.
"That was impressive the first time, Weasley, but we are working on Occlumency," Snape said, stowing his wand. "Nevertheless, your actions leading up to the end were a step toward improvement, levels above Potter."
Ron smiled inwardly to himself at the compliment.
"Harry had You-Know-Who in his head, it was harder for him," Ron defended his friend.
"Potter lacked both skill and effort. I assume your success is due to an abundance of empty space in your head."
Well, compliments couldn't last forever.
Ron didn't know why he was excelling at Occlumeny, but he didn't think it was due to empty space in his head. It wasn't necessarily coming easy, either. Ron was working harder because he knew how important this was. If Voldemort somehow got into Ron's head and saw what he'd seen in the Pensieve, then twenty years of both Dumbledore and Snape's careful planning would have been for nothing. Snape didn't seem to understand how hard Ron was actually trying.
"Why are you such a git?" he suddenly said, annoyed. Snape's face twitched as if ready to scowl, but he just put on a look of boredom.
"Weasley do try to elaborate so people won't take you for such a halfwit."
Ron rolled his eyes.
"If you are referring to my behavior while I was your professor at Hogwarts, would you honestly have believed my allegiance with the Dark Lord had I behaved differently? It was an alibi."
"Oh, and you were so good to begin with!" Ron snapped. All the hatred towards the potions master Ron had instilled his whole life suddenly was forming words.
"As soon as Lily was murdered, being a Death Eater was no longer your way of life. Oh sure, kill everyone else, but Lily crosses a line-"
"Silence!" Snape said it so violently, and with such emotion, that Ron shrank back, memories of Snape's torturous manners in Ron's first year of Hogwarts filling his head.
"What is done is done. Do not waste my time arguing about something that cannot be changed. Do you not think I regret my actions every single day? Can you not comprehend what growing up in a Dark household is like? I suggest, Weasley, that you understand what you are talking about before making idiotic remarks!"
And with that, Snape left the room, his robes fluttering Ron's hair as he walked by.
As soon as Snape was out of the room, it was almost as if Ron had been wearing the locket this entire time and had now just taken it off. His head cleared so fast it was as if Snape's absence had sucked the foul thoughts from his head.
Ron was disgusted with himself. Yes, Snape had made some bad decisions, but kids are impressionable. Ron couldn't even imagine what it would be like living in the Snape household, populated by Death Eaters. If anything, Lily's death showed Snape that what he'd been told his whole life, all that he knew, was wrong. No wonder Snape had fought so fiercely against Voldemort afterwards.
A glint of black suddenly caught his attention as Ron's Dark Mark seemed to glow brighter, and suddenly it made sense. Ron forcefully yanked his robe so that it was covering the black tattoo and left the room after Snape.
That night, Ron wandered into the kitchen for dinner, still ashamed at his actions hours earlier. Snape made no notice, or at least pretended not to notice, and Ron sat studying Snape warily. Linky seemed to detect the tension, for he served the food–braised kippers and mash – and was gone before Ron could even utter a thank you. Ron had assumed Snape would take his dinner elsewhere as he had done on several occasions, but Snape made no intentions of leaving.
"We have a matter to discuss," Snape said once Linky had cleared their plates and given them each their tea. Ron stirred an entire sugar cube into his.
"What matter?" Ron said with only a slight tang in his voice. Snape ignored it.
"I assume it is not just Potter that must be destroyed," Snape said. Ron winced at the word destroyed. He couldn't accept the idea of his friend being destroyed, even if it was in an effort to kill Voldemort.
"Horcruxes," Ron said, "seven of them."
Snape didn't seem surprised. Being brought up amongst the Dark Arts, he must have known about Horcruxes.
"And the other six are?"
Ron sighed. Thinking about the Horcruxes made him feel guiltier and more hopeless. He'd left Harry and Hermione, and now he wasn't even progressing in the search.
"Riddle's diary," Ron began. "Harry destroyed it down in the chamber. There was Guant's ring, which Dumbledore already destroyed."
Snape nodded for Ron to continue.
"Slytherin's locket we got a few months ago… we–I mean they– still have no way of destroying it though. Harry thinks Hufflepuff's cup is another. Harry said Dumbledore thought You-Know-Who would use objects from the other two houses as well…something from Ravenclaw and… Harry, I guess."
"Have you not learned to count, Weasley? That is just six, you said there were seven."
Ron just shook his head. They had only ever talked about the ones they knew. Ron figured they would get to the unknown ones once they'd dealt with the others.
"I don't know," he said.
"And am I correct to assume that you cannot simply dispose of them by normal means?" Snape asked, sipping his tea. Ron shook his head.
"Basilisk fang," he muttered. They'd have a hard time getting any of those though, unless Snape was secretly a Parselmouth. Ron wouldn't be surprised though based on all the other things Snape had been hiding from him. Then his eyes widened. "The Sword of Gryffindor!" he amended suddenly. He'd almost forgotten the conversation they'd had just before Ron left, about the Sword taking in that which made it stronger. Snape's eyes flickered from his tea to Ron.
"Because Harry stabbed the basilisk with it," Ron said. "It's at Hogwarts, isn't it?!" he exclaimed, standing up in excitement.
"Calm down, Weasley, it wouldn't be prudent to retrieve it at this moment. Dumbledore had it under wards before he died. In addition, it is too risky for you to be traveling to Hogwarts. When the time is right, I shall get the Sword."
Ron sat down. Snape was right of course. For Ron to show his face at Hogwarts, or anywhere else for that matter, would be to give everything away.
"I have an idea of what the last Horcrux may be," Snape said, changing the subject. "The Dark Lord keeps a pet with him at all times. A snake."
Ron nodded. "It makes sense that he would want to keep one of them with him," he said.
Snape sipped the last of his tea and stood.
"We'll continue Occlumency tomorrow," he announced before leaving the kitchen. Ron heard the front door open and close. There was a crack outside and Ron knew Snape had left.
That night, Ron studied the Deluminator again. It must have another function other than putting out the lights. As much as he searched and shook it though, nothing happened except the temporary darkness he kept subjecting himself to.
The next day was Christmas Eve, but Ron wouldn't have even realized had Linky not served them Christmas nog that night at dinner. Snape had made no plans to celebrate, and that was perfectly fine with Ron. It didn't seem right to celebrate when he could only imagine how Harry and Hermione would be spending their Christmas Eve. He preferred to use the time to practice Occlumency anyway.
It seemed that all Ron and Snape were doing was Occlumency lessons, and he knew of its importance, but he was starting to get restless. They hadn't even gotten the Sword yet!
"You are not clearing your mind, Weasley!" Ron heard Snape shout as he was pulled from the current memory.
"You never told me how to do any of this," Ron retorted back, the stress making him anxious. He felt sympathy towards Harry as he recalled watching his friend come back from brutal sessions in fifth year. Snape's teaching methods were simple and harsh: Shout and curse.
"However pathetic your life seems to have been, you mustn't let the Dark Lord in. This is imperative, Weasley," Snape said, only giving Ron enough time to wield his wand before he attacked again. "Legillimens!"
Ron was in the tent listening to the radio, the sounds of Harry and Hermione's chatter in the background.
He was yelling at Harry, accusing him of having no family.
He was demanding Hermione come with him.
He was leaving the tent, ripping off the locket. Hermione screamed his name into the night.
"NO!" Ron shouted.
Hermione's desperate voice had brought him back to the present. It was the last memory he had of her, and he couldn't relive it again. It was only a painful reminder that all he was doing was Occlumency while his friends were starving in the forest. He forced the dark presence in his mind out until he was thinking of nothing. Something was banging on his head, but he wouldn't open his mind, wouldn't let it in.
All of a sudden, it was over. Ron collapsed onto the ground, his head feeling particularly heavy and extremely painful. His ears rang as hard footsteps vibrated against the floor.
"That was it, Weasley."
Ron thought of Hermione. She hated him. He'd put her in an impossible position when he'd walked out on her, on both of them. How could Ron have abandoned them when this was the time when Harry needed him the most? How could he accuse Harry not knowing what losing someone feels like, when Harry had lost the most out of all of them?
"Weasley, get up." Snape grabbed Ron's arm and Ron stood, he wavered slightly, but he didn't fall.
"We'll go again tomorrow."
"No," Ron said. "Tonight, keep going."
"Weasley, however much I would love to pry around in your pitiful mind, we've done enough for today," Snape said with the usual drawl.
"I want another go, just one." Ron was adamant to never let them down again. If Voldemort were to ever read his thoughts, he, Harry and Hermione would all be done for.
"Legillimens!" Snape yelled without warning. Ron was caught off guard at first, but he forced up a barrier. He did not think about anything, and therefore Snape wasn't able to read any more of his thoughts. The pressure on his mind vanished.
"An ordinary job," Snape said. Ron said nothing. "Now go to bed, I don't want you to collapse."
Ron was about to turn to leave the practice room when he saw them.
For a fleeting moment, he was at Grimmauld Place, Hermione was talking to Harry about the Ministry break in they had been planning.
Ron quickly put up the barriers and concentrated only on keeping Snape out of his head. But Ron soon realized this wasn't Snape. This presence clawed at the barriers while Snape had pushed. Ron could almost imagine a thin white bony hand ripping at the edges of his mind and forcing its way through.
Although it took quite a fight, Ron wouldn't let anymore memories enter his mind, and soon the clawing stopped.
"Weasley!"
Ron was back in Snape's room. His head was spinning, and he grabbed the doorframe for support.
"What happened?" Snape demanded.
"Harry…" Ron muttered. Now that he wasn't focused on keeping the presence out of his mind, all he could think of was Harry and Hermione.
"Did the Dark Lord see anything?" Snape said urgently, clutching Ron's shoulder.
"Just…Harry, and Hermione for a sec," Ron whispered. He grabbed the Deluminator in his pocket out of habit. "They were talking…."
"About what, Weasley!? What did the Dark Lord hear?" Snape was now clutching Ron's shoulders, and Ron could feel his fingers digging into his back.
"They–" Ron started, but before he could say anything, a searing pain shot through his arm as if a branding rod had been placed there. Ron clutched his now glowing green arm and sunk to his knees.
"Go," Snape said. He sounded annoyed and agitated at the same time. Ron looked at Snape's black eyes in surprise.
"You're not coming?" he asked incredulously.
"The Dark Lord wishes to speak with you alone," Snape answered monotonously. Ron kept his gaze on Snape as he used the wall to pull himself to his feet, still weary from the Legilimency attack.
"You must project the memory, Weasley, we've been over it," Snape said urgently. He handed Ron his wand.
"I can't– I've never…" Ron stuttered. He'd never projected new memories before. And how could he possibly try anything new while Voldemort was ripping apart his brain?
"Instead of thinking of nothing, think of that memory, you must only think of that memory. Do you understand?" Ron had never seen Snape this worried before.
"He will be much stronger when he's in your presence and looking you in the eyes."
"Yes– okay," Ron said unsteadily.
"Good," Snape said. He pushed Ron to the door. "Now go, he's waiting,"
Ron stumbled out the door and quickly disaparated, specifically where he was unsure, but he knew–instinctively, almost–that Voldemort would pull Ron to him.