All Characters belong to Stephenie Meyer
NOTE: This chapter is important—short—but important to understand Bella's thinking. If I combined it with the next chapter it would be very long. Sooooo….I decided to make this one a little short instead. Enjoy!
"Bella?" I heard Charlie call as I walked into the door.
"Yeah Charlie, It's me." I answered as I walked into the kitchen.
"Where've you been? Dinner's on the table if you're interested."
"Thanks. I had to get the notes from Edward Cullen, and then I had an accident. But it's no big deal I'm fine." I quickly added as I stood in the entrance to the living room where Charlie laid on the sofa.
"Are you sure you're all right?" He asked sitting up, eyeing my bandaged hand. His face looked concerned.
"I'm sure, but I have a lot to do before bed. I'm going to go to my room now to get some work done."
He settled back down on the couch, appeased. "Take it easy honey. Don't work too hard."
"I won't. Night dad."
I settled into my bedroom and instantly set to work. By nine I still wasn't done, even though Edward's notes were beyond amazing, I just couldn't concentrate.
Nothing added up. I was convinced he could read minds but I wasn't so sure anymore. There were to many times where he had genuinely been surprised by me. He was either a very good actor, which I was not ruling out, or there was something else there. He said so himself, that he could not read me, that I was hard for him to figure out.
I could not deny the unusual way he seemed to communicate with his father at the hospital. There was Port Angeles, where he knew exactly where I was to meet my friends without me having said a word.
I was so certain…I trailed off growling in frustration. If he couldn't read minds then what could he do? He knew about my dream, which I was positive of. Maybe he had another ability that had to do with reading people, but that still did not explain me. Why did he claim to be unable to read me, yet still seem to know information only I knew?
This was getting me nowhere. I was thinking in circles. I decided to not dwell on his abilities and focus on something much more important and personal. He had been so worried for me today. Why? Why did he seem to care so much? If it were not for his insistence I never would have gone to the hospital. He was far too persuasive than anyone had a right to be. He could dazzle me with his eyes into doing almost anything.
He was dangerous. Instinctively I knew that, but I could not make myself believe that he was bad. He claimed to not be a good friend for me, yet he was always there when I needed him most. He had warned me time and time again that he was dangerous, but his actions always proved otherwise. He protected me, kept me safe, and defended me against others, including myself. Could I possible trust him? Was he really that bad?
I brought my knees to my chest as I leaned back against my bed. I bit my bottom lip as my mind whirled with possibilities.
Would it really be so horrible if we were friends? Before when I made my decision to stay away I really didn't know him as I do now. I trusted him, probably more than I should. I trusted him with my life. Was that exactly what I would be forfeiting if I got involved with him? I shook my head, I couldn't think that way.
I frowned. I was a fool anyway to think friendship was all that I wanted. I couldn't lie to myself no matter how hard I tried. Despite all I had done to try and be good, and hold to my decision, I couldn't stay away. I didn't want to stay away.
A small smile crossed my face as I thought of him. The way I felt when I was around him was like nothing I had ever felt before. The way his eyes pierced me, like he could see into my soul, made me feel…beautiful.
The emotions he invoked in me were like nothing I had ever experienced. With one glance I was putty in his hands, one word and I was madder that I had ever been before, one touch…
I closed my eyes, carefully touching my burnt hand, as I remembered the feel of his hand on mine. Just remembering the feeling caused butterflies to form in my stomach and my hand to tingle.
When I was with him he made me smile. I missed him when he was away, no matter how much I tried to deny it. I yearned for his company. I tried to stay away—tried to be good—but he made it so hard. Everything around us kept pushing us together over and over again. I couldn't seem to escape him, and to be honest, I was glad I never had.
I sighed. I was in love with Edward Cullen. I was sure of it. I could either give into my feelings and let them lead me where they may or… I cringed internally as I contemplated my second choice. I reached up with my good hand and rubbed my chest as pain ripped through it. No, that was not an option. I was in too deep. I could fight it no longer. I was going to leave it all to chance and allow my heart, instead of my mind, lead me where it may.
He had proven trustworthy. I was willing to chance it all. Tomorrow would prove interesting if nothing else. I was still cautious, and afraid, but I needed him.
With my decision finally made, I felt lighter. I was able to finish the project without any further distractions. I was anxious to see Edward again tomorrow. I was anxious to see how things would play out between us.
I crawled into bed a little after eleven too tired to think any longer. Sleep came over me almost as soon as my head hit my pillow, but not before an image of Edward Cullen crossed my mind. He was smiling my favorite crooked smile and only had eyes for me.