"Whoa!" He hands her a tissue, "I'm sorry."
She wipes the tears from her face, and finds herself totally embarrassed by her uncontrollable display of emotion. She decides to give him what he wants in order to attempt to keep her secret just a little bit longer.
"Mac?"
"You're right."
"I am?" He cocks an eyebrow.
"I haven't been sleeping well," she answers.
"Oh."
"I guess that I can't hide the truth from you."
"No," he agrees, "You can't."
"I have really been struggling lately," she adds continuing to tell the truth.
"I knew that you were. You should have said something."
"I should have said something, you're right," she plays to his ego.
"It's not too late. Tell me now," he begs.
"You were right about everything," she clarifies.
"I was?" He folds his arms across his chest.
"I let things get out of hand. I am so sorry. I knew that I was making a mistake. I just thought that I could hide it from you. I should have known that wouldn't work."
"Yeah, you should have," he nods in agreement.
"I have been drinking again. In fact, I have been drinking a lot, lately."
"Sarah, you should have asked for help. I feel like this is all my fault. I should have paid better attention. I should have said something. I should have confronted you. I feel like I drove you to drink."
"I have no one but myself to blame," she accepts responsibility.
"Maybe you should go home."
"I'll be okay."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah."
"You're hung-over," he articulates as a statement, instead of a question.
"It's just a headache now, I'll take an Advil, and I'll be fine."
"An Advil isn't going to solve all your problems."
"I am going to go to a meeting as soon as I get off work," she vows.
"Do you want me to go with you?"
"No. I need to do this on my own," she insists.
"If you need anything you'll let me know."
"Of course," she agrees.
"I know how hard this was for you to admit. Thank you for being honest with me."
She nods, and he turns to leave the room. He closes the door behind himself. The smell of coffee, and aftershave lingers. She swiftly grabs her trashcan off the floor. Her trash can is the only one in the entire office that is lined. In fact Harriet has double lined her trashcan. There is a waxy paper bag in the bottom, followed by a layer of plastic. She vomits into the trash can. She pours herself a glass of water, and proceeds to rinse her mouth out. She brushes her teeth again. She looks up when she hears knocking at her door.
"Enter," she responds.
Harriet enters the room, and finds Sarah holding the trashcan. Without a word she slips it from her hands.
"The Admiral wants to see you in his office."
"Thank you, Harriet."
"What did you tell…"
Sarah cuts her off, "I told him what he wanted to hear."
Harriet arches an eyebrow, "And what is that, ma'am?"
"That I've been drinking again."
Harriet just grins, "Of course you did."
Mac excuses herself from the room. She heads into the Admiral's office. She expects to find Harm waiting in his office, but he is nowhere to be found.
"Close the hatch," he instructs her.
She nods, and closes the door behind her. She stops in front of the Admiral's desk.
"Have a seat," he insists.
She takes a seat.
"Are you doing alright?"
"I'm fine, sir," she answers.
"Commander Rabb seems to think otherwise."
"He sees what he wants to see," she responds.
"He raises some valid points."
"He has expressed his concern?"
"Yes," he confirms, "And I can't say that I don't share some of his concerns."
"Sir, I don't know what he told you, but he doesn't know what he's talking about."
"I get the impression that he thinks you've been drinking again."
"I can assure you that I have not."
"So if I had you pee in a cup right now I wouldn't find anything?"
"I will certainly pee in a cup, or supply a blood sample if it would put your mind at ease, sir. I do however hope that you can simply take me at my word."
"Colonel, I want to believe what you're telling me."
"You are having doubts, sir?"
"It is pretty clear to me that you are having some out of character behavior as of late."
"Sir, I assure you that it is not what you think."
He squints, "How do you know what I think?"
"I don't," she admits.
"Colonel is there something that you want to tell me?"
"Not at this time, sir."
"Then I won't ask. I would however, like to remind you that if there is something that you need to tell me at some point, I expect you to do so."
"Yes, sir."
"Colonel MacKenzie, I also expect you to be on time. Is that understood?"
"I apologize for my tardiness this morning. I had an appointment that took much longer than expected," she reveals.
"I am going to assume that you had a dental appointment. Dismissed."
"Aye," she quickly scurries out of the room.
That evening she is sitting at home going through case files for court the following day. As she sits on her couch she finds herself becoming incredibly distracted. She digs a manila folder out of the bottom of the pile. She flips it open, and stares at a stack of pamphlets. She carefully reads through each one of them. She makes her way through the entire stack. She finds a black and white image staring up at her. She removes the image from the folder. She carefully studies each millimeter of the still. She reaches for the phone and dials a familiar number.