All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer
Edward was waiting for me in the front room. As soon as I opened the door to the bedroom he stood staring at me with unfathomable eyes. They were the liquid gold color I loved so much. I smiled weakly at him hating myself more and more because of what I had done.
"How are you today?" He asked as I approached him.
I didn't answer at first. I looked around quickly, noticing Alice was nowhere to be found. I wasn't sure where she was but I was happy for the privacy.
"I'm fine." I replied as I sat down beside him. He sat next to me and took one of my hands in his.
I remained quiet as I contemplated how to tell him about my decision. I needed him to understand more than anything.
"What are you thinking?" He asked after a few minutes had passed.
I sighed feeling unprepared. I could see him growing impatient.
"There's something I need to tell you, but I need you to hear me out before you say no."
His eyes tightened ever so slightly. "Okay." He promised slowly.
I took a deep breath. "First, I'm sorry about last night. I should never have treated you that way. I was horrible. I know how hard it is for you being here with me and waiting instead of with the others. I never meant to imply that you were doing nothing or being a coward…" I trailed off ducking my head as tears filled my eyes.
I felt his fingers under my chin coaxing my face up ever so gently. A small smile graced his lips. "Bella." He breathed. His icy breath spread across my face instantly causing me to become dizzy. "There is nothing to forgive. The way you reacted after finding out about your mother, it's normal. You're under a lot of stress."
I shook my head. "That's no excuse. I'm sorry."
He leaned down and pressed his lips to mine briefly before resting them at my ear. "Consider it forgotten."
I shivered slightly.
He pulled back and swept his lips once more across my mouth before pulling away completely.
"Now, what did you really want to tell me?"
I turned my head to the side. It would be easier for me to make my demands if I wasn't looking at him.
"I have been thinking about things a lot lately." I hedged.
"Go on." He urged. I could hear the curiosity in his voice.
"I—I made a decision." I announced quickly. I was suddenly very nervous. I wondered if he could feel how clammy my hands were getting.
"Oh." His voice was tight and controlled.
I paused sneaking a quick look at his face. It was calm and composed. He was giving nothing away.
I sighed looking back towards the wall. "I'm going to Arizona." I tried to sound firm but it came out sounding more like a question than statement.
"No." He answered almost instantly.
I turned to look at him. "You promised."
"I heard you out Bella. The answer is still no."
"But"
"No buts. I'm not bending on this. There is no way I am allowing you to go anywhere near where the Tracker might be."
I narrowed my eyes at him in anger. "I'm not bending either. I have to go." I explained through clenched teeth.
"No you don't." His jaw was tight and I could see the strength it was taking him to keep his mounting anger under control. Importunely, I did not posses his control.
I rose to my feet. "I don't need your permission."
He glared at me for a long moment before he shut his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand. He still had one of my hands in his and his grip was getting tighter. It was growing uncomfortable.
"Be reasonable Bella."
I didn't want to fight with him, but I wasn't willing to surrender either. I closed my eyes and sighed heavily. When I opened my eyes again Edward was still in the same position. I took a step towards him and positioned myself on his lap, but still he did not move. I raised our intertwined hands to my face and rubbed the back of his hand against my cheek.
He relaxed slowly and finally pulled me close, tucking my head under his chin.
He sighed. "I just can't allow it Bella. You can hate me forever for stopping you, but it's not going to happen."
"Please Edward, just hear me out." When he didn't respond right away I quickly continued. "I can't live like this anymore. The waiting is killing me. I have to protect my mother. If he gets to her before I can…" I trembled slightly at the thought. Edwards's arms tightened around me. "I would never forgive myself. I couldn't live with myself knowing there had been something I could have done to stop it. Can you understand where I'm coming from just a little bit?"
"The others will be there soon. They can protect her."
I shook my head. "Not good enough. I need to know she's safe. I can convince her to go away. That will free up the others to concentrate only on catching the Tracker."
"It's too risky. If anything were to happen to you." He rubbed my back kissing the top of my head.
"I can't just sit here. I'm going with or without you." I could feel him tense around me, the familiar anger once again filling him at my obstinacy.
"Come with me." I swiftly added. "Protect me. I know you would never let anything happen to me. I'll be safe with you."
I felt him lift his arm as he ran a hand through his disheveled hair. "I just can't risk it. Your safety is too important to me. Please, understand Bella."
An idea hit me then. I pulled back away from him to look him in the eyes. They were pained and searching mine for understanding. But I could give him none. If it meant my life, so be it. I had to make my mother safe. Hopefully, my idea would comfort him some.
"Why don't we ask Alice when she gets back? She can search the future for us and see if there is any danger for me when I go. If there is…well...then…I'll reconsider." I lied hoping he wouldn't hear it in my voice. "If not, we go."
He groaned. "Fine." He answered. "But I get to be the judge as to what constitutes danger." He added quickly quirking an eyebrow at me daring me to argue.
I smiled, silently agreeing to his terms.
Now all I had to do was wait for Alice to return.