Rachel and Seamus had another row at breakfast the next day. Over something trivial, if you'd believe it.

"Pass the sausages," Seamus said to Rachel, keeping his eyes on his plate.

"I don't have them."

"Yes, you do."

"No. I do not."

"Stop the games and just give me the damn sausages."

"I. Don't. Have. Your. Damn. Sausages."

"Why do I not believe you?"

"Because you're stupid?"

"Oh, so now I'm stupid!'

"Yes! You're stupid!"

"Hey, you two, maybe you should sit down," Tanya said nervously. They had gotten up from the table in an attempt to give the illusion that one was taller than the other. Dominance issues; you probably wouldn't understand.

"Well, needless to say who belongs to the smallest country in Europe!"

"The king of 'the smallest country in Europe,' William of Orange, creamed your stupid King Edward!"

"Pushover, Willy was."

"Just like you!"

Seamus arranged a smug look on his face. "But I'm taller than you."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah!"

"Guys, who's taller?"

"Erm…back to back," Hannah said apprehensively.

The two got into position, both standing ramrod-straight. "Um…Seamus is taller…you reach his ear…"

Rachel stepped away, shocked. How had she not noticed before? But it was obvious now; her line of vision was level with his nose. Her shoulders sagged, and she was about to admit defeat when Seamus spun around—

And laughed at her.

For those of you who do not know Rachel personally, the one thing she hates more than being wrong, is being laughed at when she's wrong. Seamus ought to have known better, but we won't argue on his behalf here.

"Seamus, knock it off," Rachel hissed, her hands balling into fists.

"Oho," Seamus cackled gleefully, "the great omniscient one isn't omniscient, after all! Ha, ha!"

"Cut it out," she snarled, and lunged for his jugular vein. He danced out of her reach and laughed at her attempt.

Needless to say, Rachel saw red, and no lie. The last straw snapped into a million pieces, and she reached back her hand and slapped Seamus full across the mouth.

The rest of the Funny Farm bolted out of their seats to restrain their friends, because it was clear that they wanted each other's blood. And that goes against the Funny Farm Golden Rule No. 24: No Brawling.

"Why must you be so damn difficult?" Rachel cried, struggling against her restrainers.

Seamus stuck his tongue out at her.

With a screech like a scalded cat, Rachel wrenched free of Tanya's iron grip, grabbed her book bag, and stomped out of the Great Hall.

"Now you've done it," Katelyn said dryly.

"Me? What have I done?"

"Don't start with me, too, Mister," Katelyn warned. "You haven't been very nice to Rachel at all lately."

"Making fun of her hair."

"Yelling at her for singing."

"Blaming her for sleeping on your shoulder when you're the one who didn't want to wake her in the first place."

"Insulting her Quidditch skills."

"Not noticing her braces were—"

"I get the point, I get the point," Seamus said in annoyance. "I just—wait. What about her braces?"

"She got them off over the holiday. Didn't you notice? You really hurt her feelings."

Seamus shook his head sullenly and was cross and crabby to everyone (including the teachers) until dinner.

----------

The female end of the Funny Farm were hanging out in the Entrance Hall when Malfoy began causing trouble—again.

They watched impassively, not wanting to seem nosy, as Harry not-so-subtly brushed Malfoy off. Not that they blamed him. Actually, they admired him for not hauling off and whacking Malfoy one, which (Rachel was very proud of this incident) they'd done last year. Harry was a great guy. No—

"Harry!" Katelyn cried as Draco pulled out his wand and made to hex Harry as the bespectacled boy turned to go.

"OH, NO, YOU DON'T, LADDIE!"

Everyone froze.

Mad-Eye Moody, their new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor, stumped through a ring of curious students towards the now-shivering white ferret that was cowering on the flagstones. But Shelby beat him to it, and was just about to scoop the animal up in her arms.

"LEAVE IT!"

The pixie-like blonde jumped and instantly dropped Draco Malfoy, Ferret, to the floor.

Unrestrained laughter burst forth from every student then as Moody hexed the ferret, bouncing him off the flagstones and into the air. That laughter immediately died away as McGonagall swooped down upon Moody from seemingly nowhere, and each student quickly began whistling and hastened off to inform their classmates.

"You'll never guess what just happened," Hannah gushed when they met Dean and Seamus in the hall a moment later.

"Snape had a heartattack?" Seamus asked hopefully.

"Not quite," Tanya replied. "Actually, Moody turned Draco Malfoy into a ferret!"

There was a shocked silence. "Really?" Dean breathed finally.

Rachel nodded happily and sighed. "It was the best day of my entire life."

-----------------

Evening…the best time of day. On that particular late afternoon, Katelyn was sitting in a comfy chair by the snapping Common Room fire, warming up her vocal chords. "Summer air was heavy and sweet, you and I on a crowded street…there was music everywhere. I can see us there. In a happy little foreign town, where the stars are upside down, a half a world away, far, far away."

"That's a good song."

She turned to see a blonde and blue-eyed fifth year coming towards her. Wes Marks, if she remembered correctly. "Yeah, it is."

Wes sat down on a nearby chair and stuck out his hand. "Wes. Wes Marks."

So she'd been right. "Katelyn Barcanic."

"Oh," he said, nodding.

"Oh, what?"

"You're friends with that couple that's always so entertaining."

"Huh?"

"You know, the tall girl with the long nose and the Irishman with the sort of dark blonde hair. They never fail to amuse us. It's like having our own little Gryffindor soap opera."

Katelyn shut her eyes with the irony of it all. "Rachel and Seamus? Oh, you've got to be kidding me. They hate each other at the moment, and would rather die than fancy each other. That's what they say, anyway."

"Hah." Wes grinned, and Katelyn felt unashamed fluttering in her stomach.

"Oy! Wes!"

Wes looked up. "Yeah, be right there. Sorry, Katelyn, gotta go."

"Yeah. See ya."

"See ya around."

Katelyn watched him go, and she was in no denial afterwards about the way she hungered for his glances.