Chapter Twenty-Three:

One Mucho Longo Convo

Another day passed with all the Hogwarts students and professors getting ready for the Yule Ball, the biggest event in Hogwartian society yet that season. The girls, in particular, were busy figuring out just what they'd wear and how they'd do their hair, while the boys spent all day figuring out how not to embarrass themselves in front of their dates and doing boy things like charming paper airplanes to flap across the common room and bury themselves in the girls' hair and getting into numerous little scuffles to prove their manhood before the big, possibly emasculating, night.

However, not everyone was worried about the ball—the Funny Farm males, along with Harry and Ron, were busy talking about Dean's night with Hannah.

"Dean snogged Hannah! Dean snogged Hannah!" Seamus, Ron, and Harry singsong-ed through the corridor.

"Shut up!" Dean snapped.

"Oi, Dean!" the Weasley twins shouted, jogging up to the poor boy.

Dean slapped a hand over his eyes with a groan.

"We heard what happened last night between you and a certain girl whose sister is married to a certain Quidditch Keeper and whose name happens to start with an 'H'," George snickered.

"Dean and Hannah, sittin' on the couch, K-I-S-S-I-N-G," Fred shouted gleefully.

"First comes love," said Ron.

"Then comes marriage," Harry put in.

"Then comes a baby in the baby carriage!" Seamus whooped.

"It's not funny," Dean protested, darkly. "I might've gone too fast and—y'know…scared her a little."

"Oh, come off it, Dean," Ron said off-handedly. "Every girl dreams of her first kiss."

"But it has to be from the right guy," Harry added.

Dean gave him a baleful look. "Thanks a ton, Harry. That made me feel so much better."

"No problem."

"This will also make you feel better," Seamus said, quieting visibly. "…The girls are coming."

"Oh, hell!" Dean hissed, and leapt behind Seamus.

"Hiya, guys, ready for the ball?" Seamus said, all-too-cheerfully, hoping to divert their attention from cowering Dean.

It was hard to ignore the fact that Dean was holding Seamus' robes out so as to further disguise his presence, but Tanya answered brightly, "We're all ready to…well…get ready. We just hope our dates are."

Rachel was staring at Dean's cringing form. "Er…Seamus? What's Dean doi—"

"Lovely night, isn't it!" Seamus bellowed, giving her furious and painfully obvious winks.

"Right…"

"Speaking of lovely nights, how are you, Dean?" Katelyn asked, a smirk on her face.

"That has nothing to do with lovely nights, I'll have you know," Seamus said with affront.

"Thank you, Dean," Rachel said, giving Seamus a look. He blew a puff of air that ruffled his sandy-colored hair and tugged his robes out of Dean's grasp, stepping away from the hunched teenage boy.

Dean lost his balance and toppled forward before regaining his footing and standing sheepishly.

"Hi," Hannah said, meekly.

"Hi," Dean mumbled.

There was a long few moments of uncomfortable silence, and then they both said "Bye," and escaped in opposite directions.

"Man," Seamus sighed, breaking the silence. "That was awkward."

"And it's not like they can avoid each other, either, 'cause they're going to the ball together," Rachel replied.

"I feel sorry for Hannah," Tanya said sympathetically. "She was all dazed and confused last night."

"Hey, what about Dean?" Seamus said. "I know you girls don't give a rat's ass about—"

Rachel whopped him upside the head.

"—About men's feelings, 'n all," he continued undeterred, rubbing the back of his skull, "but Dean's really been beating himself up about the whole damn thing."

Whop.

"He can't stand thinking that he's gone and bloody hurt—"

Whop.

"Would you stop that?" Seamus bellowed, clapping his hands over the back of his sore head.

"Stop swearing, young man," Rachel cautioned, shaking a finger at him.

"I'll damn well say what I bloody please, thank you," he replied.

Whop.

"STOP THAT!"

Rachel gave an impish grin. "Oh, hush, you. You know you deserved it."

He snarled angrily at her, but was unable to do anything, because Fred cleared his throat noisily at the very moment that Seamus would have strangled Rachel. "You were saying, Seamus?"

He huffed and crossed his arms. "Anyway, Dean can't stand thinking that he's gone and hurt Hannah's feelings."

"Oh, you men are all crybabies," Katelyn said.

"That is a bloody lie and you know it," Seamus countered indignantly, catching Rachel's hand before she could thwap him.

Rachel looked impressed at his quick reflex, but she shook free and said, "Oh, really? You wanna bet?"

"I don't gamble."

"Well, I recall one instance in first year when a certain plate of blueberry crisp landed on your Kenmare Kestrels t-shirt," Rachel said teasingly. "You cried like a little kid until I showed you the Scourgify spell."

"That was an extremely rare and precious artifact!" Seamus cried, so loudly that several people in the hall turned to look. "If you don't remember, it was autographed by the entire Kestrels team, especially for me. Lynch wrote 'To my mate Seamus Finnigan. May you fly like the hippogriff and fight like the dragon.' Quigley wrote 'To S.F.: Fly on, little dude!' Connolly wrote—"

"We've only heard this story a million times, Seamus, mate," Ron interrupted.

Seamus looked displeased, and Rachel noticed and patted his arm. "There, there, Finnigan. We know how important the Kestrels are to you."

He grunted, but appeared appeased, so the conversation continued.

"What about the two star-crossed lovers?" George asked, with a smirk.

"Oh, let them be," Rachel said automatically. "There's nothing worse than being badgered about one's interest in somebody when there's absolutely nothing one can do about it. Besides—maybe they'll work it out tomorrow."

Katelyn and Tanya glanced at her, but the boys nodded. "That sounds like the easiest solution to our little problem," Fred said carelessly.

Seamus and Ron laughed. Rachel shrugged, and then the Funny Farm and the other Gryffindor boys went their separate ways for lunch.