Okay, this is now the third time I've tried to sit down and write this chapter. Both of the previous times I've completely scrapped it and started over, so I'm hoping I won't have to do that this time. And then I watched all six or seven hours of season three of Reboot the other day. It made me think of how similar big Enzo is to Ed. Anger problems… XD If you haven't seen Reboot before, I highly suggest it. ANYwho…

As you all know, AdventureAddict does not in any way own any part of Fullmetal Alchemist.

On wit' da show!

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Chapter Sixteen – Ed vs. The Crazy Ice Cream Lady

Ed slouched on the sofa as he watched the broadcast of the Thanksgiving parade on TV. The broadcasters were currently explaining all the different people it took to pay for one big Elmo balloon. What was Elmo anyway? He looked like an unfinished strawberry smoothie the blender had rejected.

"Ed, are you ready to see the family?" Sherry called from the kitchen. Smells kept wafting to Ed from her direction and making his stomach rumble impatiently. Thanksgiving was just another form of torture for kids who didn't behave.

"Yeah, I'm ready," He called back as a particularly strong smell of stuffing reached his nostrils.

"Do you look nice?" Sherry asked. Ed tore his eyes away from the TV and looked down at his clothes. He was wearing a hoodie, gloves, jeans and sneakers – the normal outfit of choice for Ed. He looked over his clothes quickly to try and find any flaws. A few crumbs from his pop-tart that morning were littered across his hoodie, and he quickly brushed them to the side, not caring to think about how little he must have moved in order to still have crumbs from breakfast hanging around.

"Yeah," he assured Sherry two seconds before she appeared in the archway between the kitchen and the dining room.

"Edward!" Sherry said in surprise and Ed sank into the cushions to try and block out some of the sound. He had gotten rid of the crumbs, so what was she angry about? "This will be the first time most of these people will be seeing you, and I want you to look nice. Now, go put on that suit I left in your room this morning," She scolded. Ed let out an exasperated sigh and turned back to the TV. "Now, where's Robyn? Her father left me something for her to wear."

"What?" Ed asked excitedly, looking back at Sherry. Seeing Robyn in whatever clothes her father picked out for her would definitely be more entertaining than TV.

"You'll have to wait until dinner to see," Sherry said, and Ed turned back to the TV with a sigh. He should have known better than to get his hopes up. After all, this was the day of waiting until dinner. That was why they called it Thanksgiving, Ed realized with a smirk. Because everyone was desperately giving thanks for the chance to finally eat by the time dinner came.

"Happy Thanksgiving," a sleepy voice mumbled from the stairs. Ed looked up and chuckled at the sight of Robyn standing by the stairs and rubbing her eyes. She was awake and dressed, but just barely. And now Sherry was going to force her into some outfit her dad had picked out for her.

"Oh, Robyn darling," Sherry said as if on cue, "Your father gave me the loveliest outfit for you to wear today!" Robyn looked around Sherry to Ed's comfy spot on the couch with a desperate plea written across her face. Ed smirked again as he thought of what must have been going across her mind.

Darling? Loveliest? HELP!

Sherry didn't notice Robyn's silent pleas and dragged her back up the stairs to what Ed was pretty sure she would consider the torture chamber.

Ed flicked off the TV with a sigh and dragged himself off the couch. If Robyn was going to be forced into whatever outfit her dad had left for her, he might as well put on the suit Sherry left him. At least then he knew he wouldn't be the only stupid-looking one around.

Fifteen minutes later, Ed was deeply regretting his choice. One of the reasons was because he had no idea how to tie a tie. He considered going to ask Robyn if she knew, since he had once seen that friend of hers – Kari – at school with a tie on. If Kari knew then maybe Robyn did too.

No. Ties were a guy thing and it would be way too embarrassing to go to a girl for help with a tie. Would Al know how to tie a tie? He knew that his younger brother certainly wouldn't laugh at him, but if Robyn ever found out that his younger brother had been the one to tie his tie, then he would never hear the end of it. Ed glanced back down at the tie, and then decided to risk it, making a run to the door.

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Robyn sat stubbornly on the bed and stared at the hanger in front of her lethally.

No.

Hell no.

How could her father do this to her? If Sherry said one word to her father about how she hadn't worn the clothes he had specifically got for her to wear, then she would be grounded for the rest of her life.

But of all the clothes to pick, why did he have to pick that thing?!

A dress. A real, honest-to-goodness dress. She could even remember wearing it before her mother had died. Back then it had come just below her knees. Luckily for her she hadn't grown much since then.

It was actually a pretty nice dress if you were into that sort of thing, and now that she knew about FMA, it even reminded Robyn a little bit of the kind of dresses Winry wore. The top had a nice square cut by the neck and it had no sleeves to cover up her shoulders. The rest just flowed into a plain, simple dress that matched her eyes almost perfectly. Back before her mom had died, Robyn had loved wearing dresses, and she had especially loved wearing that one just to hear her mom say how pretty her eyes looked. But now who would be around to say her eyes looked pretty?

Ed.

She shook away the thought impatiently. Ed wouldn't compliment her on her eyes; that just wasn't the type of guy he was. Robyn looked back at the dress and pulled herself off the bed. In one swift movement she pulled off her hoodie and then her t-shirt. She grabbed the dress and was about to pull it over her head when she glanced at her bare arm.

She pinched her bicep self-consciously and sighed. Why did she have to be so skinny? Most girls spent their days talking about how to lose weight, but what about girls like her whose arms looked like sticks? She turned away from her arm and looked down at her at the real problem area – her stomach. Judging from the pictures she had seen, Robyn guessed that her stomach was probably smaller than one of Armstrong's biceps. It wasn't normal. It made people think she was anorexic, and she wasn't. She never liked to skip meals because she worried that a missed meal would make her look even skinner than she was.

A sudden gasp from the doorway interrupted her out of her thoughts and she looked up just in time to see it click shut.

"Ed? Was that you?" she called out, quickly sliding the dress over her head.

"No," Ed's voice called back, and then Robyn heard the sound of a hand being slapped to his forehead. Robyn smiled to herself and pulled off her pants and socks from underneath the dress. She quickly walked back over to the door and opened it again after smoothing out any last wrinkles.

"It's okay now," she assured Ed, who had been sitting on the floor with his back against the wall. Ed looked up at her with a blush still reddening his cheeks, and then his mouth suddenly dropped in surprise. He quickly scrambled to his feet and stared at Robyn in surprise.

"Yo-you're wearing a dress!" he stammered, caught off guard by the surprise. Robyn rolled her eyes and smirked.

"Wow Ed," she said sarcastically. "I always thought they called you a child prodigy because of your gift in alchemy, not because of your amazing talent of stating the obvious. You could get a few good scholarships for that, you know."

She looked him over once and smiled. "You look nice, Ed," she said, and Ed's blush deepened even more. She walked past him and into the bathroom. "But your tie is crooked," she added before closing the door. Ed scowled and reached down to try straightening his tie once again.

Half an hour later Ed was back in front of the TV, but this time he was risking it down in the basement with Al, who was currently swaying happily to a song Julia Roberts was singing. Ed looked over at his younger brother and chuckled silently to himself.

"Robyn, do you have a driver's license?" Ed heard Sherry call from upstairs. He and Al both temporarily forgot about Julia Roberts and looked up at the door curiously.

"Yeah, why?" Robyn called back down in an annoyed voice. Ed could tell that she obviously didn't want to go outside the safe wall of the house while she was wearing a dress.

"The pumpkin pie fell on the floor," Sherry explained, "Could you please go to the store and pick up some dessert, hon?" Ed grinned and turned back to the TV, wondering silently how badly Robyn would want to hit Sherry. But he didn't hear any last dying screams from Sherry as she sank into a pile of blood, in fact, the whole house seemed…peaceful.

Then the familiar sound of Robyn's feet clomping down to the basement came a few minutes later, breaking the house out of it's strange silence. Robyn zipped up her coat and slid a ring of keys into the pocket.

"Doesn't that woman know how crazy shopping is on Thanksgiving?" Robyn muttered angrily under her breath and then turned to Ed. "Come on," she said sternly, motioning for him to get up. "If I'm going shopping for pie on Thanksgiving, I'm taking the human weapon with me."

"What?!" Ed shouted in surprise and standing up angrily. "I'm not going out shopping in a suit!" Al sighed and shook his head.

"Do you think I want to go shopping in a dress?!" Robyn shouted back, glaring angrily at Ed. "Get your coat. Now," she growled. Ed scowled and then turned to go back up stairs. Robyn watched him carefully as he stormed up the stairs. She then hurriedly turned to Al.

"Al, Ed's birthday is coming up soon, right?" she whispered quickly. Al was caught off guard by this sudden question and he stared silently at Robyn in surprise. "His birthday is in winter right?" Robyn continued, looking up at the stairs cautiously. "So it's coming up soon? Al!" she hissed urgently.

'Yeah…" Al answered absently, still trying to understand the sudden change in Robyn's mood.

"When, Al?!" Robyn whispered as she glanced back at the door. "When is it?!"

"January third," Al told her, and then suddenly jerked out of his thoughts. "But why-?" he stopped suddenly as the door at the top of the stairs creaked open. Ed peeked his head in and glared down at Robyn.

"Well? Are we going or not?" he demanded. "I want to get this over with."

"Yeah, we're going Sunshine," Robyn called back in an angry voice. "Just hang on for two seconds!" Ed rolled his eyes and closed the door again.

"Don't tell Ed about this, okay?" Robyn whispered hurriedly to Al before she ran up the stairs after Ed. Ed was leaning lazily against the wall of the living room, and once Robyn came out of the door to the basement he immediately went out the door. Robyn smiled as she sat in the driver's seat of the borrowed car and put the keys in the ignition.

"I don't get it," Ed said plainly as he stared out the window of the car. Robyn slowly pulled the car out of the driveway and turned into the street. "If you don't want to go shopping in a dress, then why are you doing this?" Robyn rolled her eyes with a sigh and focused on the road ahead.

"Because if my father hears that I put one toe out of line, I'll be grounded for a long time," she said grimly.

"And so you have to drag me into it?" Ed said angrily, turning back to look at her. Robyn resisted the urge to look over at him and kept her eyes focused on the road.

"Don't worry Ed, there'll be plenty of old ladies to elbow for the last pie," she said with a small grin. Ed sighed and leaned back against the window, watching as the snow covered trees flew past.

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Robyn dragged Ed through the isles of the store as she desperately searched for a dessert they could eat that night. Everything in the store was either out of stock or inedible. Robyn was starting to get desperate. She needed to bring something home.

"They've run out of pies," she told Ed as she screeched to a stop in front of the shelves. Ed managed to finally pull himself out of her grip and stared at the empty shelves with Robyn.

"Ice cream," he suggested quickly, and then he and Robyn both went sprinting through the store, with Robyn's dress flapping behind her. They slid to a stop in front of the refrigerated section just as a woman in jeans started reaching for the last container of mint chip ice cream.

"No!" Ed screamed, lunging for the ice cream. His and the woman's hand landed on it at the same time. "Back off lady!" Ed growled ferociously as he tried to stare her down. It didn't work so well, considering that he was shorter than the woman.

"I need it!" the woman said stubbornly as she picked it up

"We need it too!" Ed cried out, attempting to take it from her. The two of them fiercely narrowed their eyes and stared at each other. Each of them looked like they were trying to size the other one up. Then Ed suddenly let go of the ice cream and took a small step backward.

"You know, I don't think it's right to punch a lady in the face for some ice cream," He said slowly, sounding older than his age for once.

"Right," the woman said angrily. "So you're going to back off and let me have the ice cream."

"Actually, I had a slightly different plan in mind," Ed said thoughtfully, touching a finger to his chin and looking at the ceiling.

"And just what might that be?" the woman asked.

"Run like hell!" Ed yelled, grabbing the ice cream out of the woman's hands and making a beeline towards the registers. Robyn took one glance at the angry woman before she decided it would be in her best interest to follow him.

Ed finally ground to a halt at the end of a checkout line with the ice cream clutched protectively to his chest. He glanced behind him once, and after seeing no one, he turned back to face the line in front of him and sighed heavily.

"We made it," he said slowly, as if he didn't believe it himself.

"Well, I didn't," Robyn panted, leaning on a candy display beside the counter for extra support. "You try running in a dress and fancy shoes!"

"Sorry," Ed mumbled incoherently as Robyn fumbled around in her coat pocket for the twenty-dollar bill Sherry had given her. (1) Neither of them noticed the ice cream lady slowly walking up the isle towards them.

Just as Ed and Robyn were about to get rung up, a loud scream of "Hee-ya!" rang through the air flowed by a sharp crack from Ed's right wrist. Ed dropped the ice cream in surprise, and the lady grabbed it and ran.

"Hey! Give that back! We were in the line, asshole!" Robyn shouted at the back of the retreating woman. She then turned her focus to Ed, who was looking down at his hand in horror. "Well? Aren't you going to go after her?" Robyn asked expectantly. "I certainly can't in this get-up!"

"I can't move my hand," Ed whispered to her urgently. Robyn felt her whole body stiffen as she realized the seriousness of the situation. No one here even thought automail existed. How would they find someone who could fix it?

"Where's Winry when you need her?" Robyn muttered under her breath. "Come on Sunshine," she said, motioning to Ed. "Act natural." She could hear the scoff from Ed behind her as they quickly walked out the door.

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Robyn and Ed walked slowly into the dimly lit mechanic shop. Ed could hear a loud clanging from the other side of the shop, but he couldn't make out the silhouette coming form the direction of the sound. The whole place seemed smoky and even a little spooky in a way.

"Okay," Robyn whispered softly to Ed. "I just want you to know, he's a little eccentric." Ed felt his eyebrows bunch together.

"Just what exactly do you mean by 'Eccentric?'" he asked suspiciously.

"Well, gay, but-" Robyn stopped and looked up at the man over by the counter.

"Just hang on a sec," Robyn said to him before hurrying up to silhouette. The man stopped fumbling around in his toolbox to listen to Robyn when she walked up to him.

"Hey Cory," Robyn said slowly, and Ed could tell that she was quickly stringing up sentences in her head to use on whoever the man was.

"It's been a while, Robyn. I was beginning to think you forgot about me," a creamy voice said from the shadows, hinted with a slight accent that Ed couldn't quite place. "Either that or the snow beast got you. So what took you so long?"

"Well, school started back up and-"

"Oh come on, Robyn," the man sighed. "Every time you come in here it's for a favor. So what is it this time?" Robyn sighed and rested her elobows on the counter and her head in her palms.

"Remember when I told you about that manga, Fullmetal Alchemist?'

"Sweetheart," the man said with a laugh, "You've told me about so many different mangas there's no way I could possibly keep them all straight."

"The one about the cute blond boy with the metal arm," Robyn explained to the man. Ed felt himself blush slightly at the use of the word "cute," but he quickly shook it off. "Cute" was always a better adjective than "short."

"Oh! Oh course I remember that one!" the man said now dropping any work he had been trying to do despite Robyn's presence. "You got some more pictures of him, hon?"

"Not exactly," Robyn said with a slight laugh to her voice. "But," she said slowly and then paused. "Would you believe me if I told you it was real?" Ed heard the man sigh heavily beside Robyn.

"Oh, I sure wish it was Robbie," he said dreamily. "I sure wish it was."

"Well," Robyn said and then paused nervously. "It is."

"It is what?"

"It is real," Robyn told him and then turned towards Ed's direction. "Come on over here, Ed!" she called into the smog. Ed cautiously walked up to the counter and looked of the face of the man that had been a silhouette only moments before.

He had the stereotypical pretty boy face – a sharp chin and fine features accompanied by short blond hair and blue eyes. Ed could feel that he was being looked over in he same sort of way and probably also being taken for a pretty boy.

"Ed this is Cory," Robyn told him, motioning to the other man. "Cory, this is my neighbor, the Fullmetal Alchemist." Cory grinned at Ed in a way that made him feel rather uncomfortable.

"He needs his arm fixed, doesn't he?" Cory said instantly, now switching his gaze over to Robyn. "And you came to me because you knew I wouldn't tell anyone."

"In a nutshell," Robyn said flatly. "So can you help him?"

"I'll see what I can do," he told Robyn and then turned to Ed with a sly grin as he flicked on a brighter light overhead. "Take off your shirt," told Ed simply. Ed paled. "I con't do anything if I can't see it," Cory said, and Ed gulped, but slowly peeled off his jacket and then loosened the tie around his neck. Now he would need Al to help him tie it again.

Ed felt extremely bare without any shirt on as Cory walked around him in a circle. He looked out of the corner of his eye and saw Robyn's back as she looked at something on Cory's shelves. At least he wouldn't need to worry about her watching him, even though she had probably seen him do this a dozen times in the manga.

"You've got nice hair," Cory remarked smoothly from behind Ed. "But I would suggest putting eggs on it. It sounds corny, but it really does work."

"Could we please focus on my arm?" Ed growled, and he heard a small laugh from where Robyn was standing. Great. So she wasn't looking, but she wasn't making any attempt to stop herself from listening.

"Okay then, show me how bad it is," Cory said firmly. "Move your shoulder," he commanded, and Ed moved his shoulder in a wide circle. "Elbow," Cory commanded again, and Ed bent his arm back and forth. "Wrist," Cory instructed, but this time Ed was still.

"That's about where it stops," Ed told him, and Cory nodded.

"Robyn, get me a screwdriver," Cory said over his shoulder, and then turned back to Ed. "I'm going to take a little peekie inside our friend Ed here," he said with a grin, and Ed felt all the blood drain from his face. He gulped as Robyn handed Cory the screwdriver and Cory removed the first screw from his arm.

Cory slowly pulled off the top plate of Ed's arm and looked inside cautiously. Even Robyn couldn't help herself and walked over to look at all the different colored wires flowing together in smooth patterns through Ed's arm.

"That is way color than any of the pictures," Robyn breathed. Ed blushed and turned away. But it wasn't because she had complimented his arm, but because he had felt the hot tickle of her breath on his chest.

"Hey!" he yelped and turned back with a jump as Cory squeezed a few of the wires, making Ed's entire nervous system jump from the impact.

"It's okay, cutie, I'm right here," Cory said with a smile, and then turned down to Ed's arm "Here's the problem," he said seriously, pointing down by Ed's wrist. Ed peered down next to Cory's finger and saw the problem. A group of the wires had been bent into a V shape, cutting off their contact to the wrist.

"Damn ice cream lady," Ed muttered under his breath. "If I ever see her again I'll-I'll-" He was cut off as Cory suddenly bent the wires back into their normal shape.

"Ow!" Ed said angrily as Cory went back to the counter to get his toolbox. Cory pulled out some wire and electrical tape and quickly made a support for the bent wires.

"It won't last long, I'm afraid," Cory explained as Ed experimentally flexed his wrist. The support wire bent with the others when he bent his wrist, and then pushed them back into an upright position when he straightened his wrist. "I suggest you get back to that mechanic of yours – wherever she is – and have her fix that properly," Cory told Ed as he started pulling his clothes back on.

"But I bet you both have places to go on Thanksgiving," Cory said, tucking the tape back into his toolbox. "So I'll let you both go and have fun."

"What about you, Cory?" Robyn asked with a concerned look on her face as Ed scowled down at his tie. "You could come with us."

"No, I have places to go too," Cory said with a weak smile. "My mother's cooking a huge turkey at home. I just hate waiting," he added wistfully.

"Okay, I'll see you later," Robyn said with a smile as they hugged goodbye with a friendly smile. Then she and Ed walked back out into the blinding sunlight.

"So how exactly do you two know each other?" Ed asked slowly as they walked over to the car.

"He and Luke were old friends," Robyn said softly. "Way back to around first grade, before Cory knew he was gay." She sighed and then looked over at Ed. "Ed! What did you do to your tie?!" she said with a laugh. Ed scowled and crossed his arms. He had attempted to tie it back in the shop, but with minimal light and knowledge of ties, t had ended up looking more like a Celtic knot – never ending and extremely confusing.

"Sherry will notice that," Robyn said with a chuckle as she tried to keep herself from laughing very loudly.

"Fine, then you fix it," Ed said with a scowl. Robyn's smile widened slightly and she reached over and started unknotting it.

"If you say so," she mumbled under her breath as she concentrated on the tie. Ed sighed and looked up at the sky. The day had started with Robyn in a dress, and now she was fixing his tie. He didn't even want to think about what could happen next.

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(1) I'm just a bill, yes I'm only a bill, and I'm sittin' here on capitol hill… Ha! That will be stuck in your head for hours now, right!?

Yay! Another post! I was originally going to do this and thanksgiving as one long hunka chapter, but it was getting really long and it's now 11:00 at night so I just want to finish this and post it. Besides, this was fun, right? What with Cody and all… Next chapter will be a doozy. I promise and I really want to write it, but I'm exhausted… sleepy time now… bye-bye…