A/N: If you got an email of this chapter, I deleted the earlier one because of a lot of grammar/spelling errors. Please excuse those. This is the corrected version. Sorry.

Wren and Vivian left shortly after the meeting. Something about Wren having to practice her elemental powers with a private teacher. I wonder why Vivian didn't allow Wren to go to St. Vladimir's, but that is none of my busy.

"Should I bring this doll or this one?" Alexis asks me the next day while I'm packing, then repacking. She holds up two identical dolls with different outfits.

"I'm a little busy, Alexis," I say, shoving a pair of jeans in my already-full suitcase. I look at it, see it. I notice how the rest of my stuff, toothbrush, hair-dryer, etc., won't fit into it, so I throw everything out and start over again.

"So which one?" Alexis holds up the twin Barbies.

"I don't know," I breathe, "Just. . . pick that one." I point at one of the dolls without looking.

There's silence between me and the young Conta girl, so I assume she agrees with my choice - whatever it was. There's a slight plop I hear and when I look up, Alexis is on my bed and she's peering inside my suitcase. I don't know why, but I feel a particular itch of annoyance that she won't leave me alone. I wouldn't mind some privacy right about now.

"Whatcha doin'?" she asks, her voice squeaky and full of energy. I haven't had that type of energy since I was younger, and I can't help but imagine myself in the young form of Alexis. So full of youth and life. I still am full of youth, I guess, but it's not the same.

"I'm packing, Alexis," I say, as if it's obvious. It is, and I'm tempted to say, "No, I'm baking cookies instead!" Though that wouldn't be a nice choice of words - and extra sarcasm - I feel the need to do so. I keep my mouth zipped.

"Do you need help?" Alexis asks, glancing at the pile of wrinkled clothing. She also notices the unopened package that holds all my guardian stuff. Mandatory to wear on the job. It came yesterday, but Vivian forgot to tell me until today. I've been here a week and a half, so I guess it's on time. Though sometimes it feels like I've been here for years, decades even.

"Uh, sure," I say, somewhat glad of the offer. "Can you go get my makeup bag in the bathroom? Please?"

Alexis jumps off the queen-sized bed and runs into the bathroom, disappearing around the door frame. I continue to pack my bags, constantly checking how much room I have left. I am so sick of packing; it's a struggle.

Alexis returns a few minutes later, handing me my flowery makeup bag that I got when Lissa and I were on the run a few months back. Just thinking about Lissa makes me worry. What if she's not there? I ask myself.

Shut up and don't worry about, my mind replies. The constant battle between my two sides, my two shades.

"-Anything?" Alexis asks me. I feel bad for not listening, too busy having a mental conversation with myself. I think she asked me if I needed anything else.

"Um, I'm fine, Alexis," I say, "Why don't you go find Henry or. . . or Julius and play with one of them?"

Alexis frowns for a few seconds before shrugging and running out of the room at top-speed, a flurry of red hair and a ballerina costume. Sometimes I cannot help but love her, her crazy young mind. And let's not forget about the outfits.

I wouldn't mind staying here.

Whoa, where did that come from? Did my mind just derail and make some random thought pop up? Or did I really just say that? I didn't say that, I tell myself. How could I say that?

I didn't say that, I didn't say that, I did not say that. The chant rages in my head. I tell myself over and over that what I said isn't true. I would mind. I would mind staying here, away from Lissa, away from St. Vladimir's.

But that's not true.

The past week I have battled it out with myself and with Adrian about what I was going to do. I chose to stay here, but don't I want to go home some day? I have to remember, this job is only temporary.

I can't help but feel dozens of emotions course through me in a short time. Sadness from being away from Lissa and Adrian - and even Christian, though I hate to admit it. Fatigue from being a guardian. Anger at him, at Dimitri, the one who made me ever consider leaving St. Vladimir's. He left me, and then I left to make the pain go away.

But that didn't work. I have pushed back so much since coming here. Lissa. St. Vladimir's. Mason's death. Dimitri with Tasha. To think about them, about the fact that they could be together now, in love, maybe. They might even be falling in love, getting engaged, having six children! All because of Dimitri this happened.

And I know that no longer I can hold back the anger and sorrow.

I expected this to be a normal day, packing and getting ready to go to Court. But thinking about Lissa and St. Vlad's and Dimitri, it triggered so many feelings inside of me. I want to cry, to let it out. Because of Dimitri I left. Because of him I was so focused on becoming the Conta family's guardian that I was too busy to notice what would happen if I did so.

And Julius didn't make it any better. The charismatic (even though he doesn't realize it) and annoying Conta cousin was a pain in the butt. The constant flirting, the tension in the air between us, the connection that we forged through classic literature. It all ruined this even more. How much longer would he be here?

And then Wren. The only person in the house that doesn't like me. At all. She is a complicated mess, one that I cannot deal with. But I have to, because of her childish, icky ways. She only makes it worse, and I even feel like punching her right in the nose when she does something in a smart way. I yell out in frustration and slam my suitcase shut. Leaning against the bedpost, I breathe heavily, angry, wanting to slam my fist into something, or someone.

"Rose?"

I break away from the bed that I need for support, my legs momentarily wobbly before I regain my balance. I squint my eyes under the bright chandelier lights to see who it is.

And speak of the Devil.

I actually wish it was Wren. Not Julius.

"A-are you okay?" he asks, creeping closer into my room, his shoes leaving footmarks in the plush carpet.

"I'm fine," I snap at him, "Just. . . just go away, okay? I'm sort of. . ." I glance at my closed suitcase. "I'm busy, that's all."

I hate how he is always in my business. I hate how he is always there or here, somewhere, anywhere where I am. And he's so sweet, sometimes. I just feel like tearing off a teddy bear's head when he acts in such sweet and simple ways. I hate how he stares at me with big eyes and. . . and I just hate him in general.

I hate him.

"Are you sure?" Julius asks again, taking another step forward.

"Yes," I say. I am so sick of people asking me that. I have never liked it, and I don't think I will ever learn. "Go away, Julius." He stands there in an awkward hunched-over position, as if he is scared I might hit him or something. I sigh. "What do you want?"

Julius hesitates before taking a step forward, closer into the light, and saying, "I overheard you. . . I just wanted to make sure you were alright."

Where's a teddy bear when I need one?

"I'm fine," I say. "I'm fine," I repeat, glancing over at Julius. I lean against the bedpost again, unable to hold my weight any longer. "Can you just go?"

"Rose-" he starts, but I cut him off.

"Get out of here, Julius," I warn, "Leave. Now. I'm not joking."

"But-"

"I'm. Not. Kidding."

Julius gives me this hurt look before he turns away and stalks at of the room, tearing away at a fast pace. After what I did yesterday, trying to talk to him and apologize, now he wants to rekindle our acquaintance-ship? Yeah, not gonna happen.

There is this awkward silence that follows Julius' exit. I slowly zip my suitcase up, figuring I will stick the rest of my clothes in a carry-on, and walk out of my room, shutting the door behind me, and making my way downstairs. Henry and Alexis are in the basement, playing video games, so I decide to make a baloney sandwich before checking on them. While I am making the half sandwich, I hear Alexis scream. A moment of panic flares up inside me, but then I hear Henry laughing, a choked-up, amused laugh and I realize he was playing a joke on her.

I walk down to the renovated basement with a guest bedroom, a shower, and a huge playroom for the kids. There is a crib in the corner of the room and I wonder if it is Alexis' old crib. I sit down cozily on Alexis' beanbag with her as her and Henry play some racing game in which Alexis crashes every five seconds. definitely not made for kids five and below.

When Vivian and Wren return home, Vivian announces that the plan is booked and the car will be here at one in the morning. The kids moan and groan about it, but I only get more excited. That means I can get there earlier, see if Lissa is there. I have more time to do what I need to.

After Vivian makes it clear that we cannot be late, I help Henry and Alexis pack their bags, taking careful steps for their suitcases not to end up like mine. My earlier blow-up has somehow disappeared, but I know if I call for it it won't be far off. I am a ticking time bomb now. I have to watch my temper now, make sure no one sees me explode. Literally.

We stay up late watching movies, Alexis dozing off in my lap. Even Jack seems relaxed, sitting in a recliner. Though I know he is on alert, ready to jump up and fight an army of Strigoi if needed. I have almost forgotten the world of Moroi, dhampirs, and Strigoi. There is only this family. Not crowds of teenage Moroi walking around or dhampirs going to training practice, and no Moroi politics. And no Strigoi worries or so I think.

We all say our good nights, Vivian giving me a particularly sweet smile, before I head upstairs and fly on top of the bed in second's speed. Within a few seconds and a toss and turn here and there, I fall asleep to the soundness of the night and crickets chirping near the lake.

My alarm clock sings its song of its people. I slam the snooze button and excitedly jump out of bed. I take a quick, freezing cold shower and dress in my guardian clothes. A black pantsuit with a white dress shirt underneath. I sling my bag around my shoulder and pick up my suitcase, chanting the words in my mind: This is it, this is it, this is it, this is really it, this is it. I am full of jitters, making sure to stuff to anti-anxiety pills into my pants pockets before skipping happily downstairs.

The rest of the family seem ready to go, their cheeks flushed and big smiles plastered on their faces. They seem to have gotten a good feeding from their hidden feeder. As soon as Alexis spots me, she hops into my arms and I am more happy than ever. Jack walks over and talks protocol with me. You know, the latter.

There is a honking outside and the family piles out of the front doors. Two black caravans sit in the driveway. Jack and I separate, each taking a different car. Vivian, Wren, and Alexis go in one car with Jack, while I go in the car with Julius and Henry. It's a tight squeeze, but we manage. I take the backseat with Henry while Julius sits in the passenger front, occasionally stealing glances with me. The tension in the air could be cut with a knife.

"Anybody need anything?" the driver, a guy named Tin, asks. He's a brawny dhampir and he stares at me for a longer second than to anyone else. He gives me a particularly charming smile, and for a second I smile quickly back. Strangely enough, I think I see Julius give Tin a sharp glare. Tin just grunts in reply and backs out of the driveway.

I lean my head against the cool glass of the window, cracking it a bit to let the cold air swoop in. Alexis rambles on about the outfits she brought for her doll, and Julius quietly sits in the front reading a book called Ana Karenina. If we were still friends, I am sure he would recommend it to me. Probably lend it, even.

The drive to the airport is long, but we all manage to safely get there and into the private jet. Wren sits in the front of the plane, a part blocked off from the rest by a white wall and a red curtain. Vivian and Henry go up there, too, but Alexis stays behind with me. Jack is in the pit, talking with the pilots.

The plane shortly takes off, a bit of turbulence during the flight, but no storms and it doesn't take long to arrive. Or at least that's what it feels like.

There is only one word for Court at night. Breathtakingly beautiful. I can't see much from where I am at, but I can already see some things, and those things are absolutely, undeniably beautiful. The excitement only builds in my chest, suffocating me, taking my short and quick breaths away every time I exhale. The cold is absolutely stifle here, tearing through my jacket as if it were sandpaper.

We go in groups of two down the narrow stairway at the Court's airport. Wren takes Alexis. Jack takes Henry. Vivian offers Julius her hand, but he refuses politely. She frowns and starts to walk down by herself.

And then Julius is offering me his hand.

I don't want to look rude in front of my charges', so I take his hand and we walk down the stairway together. Slowly. I try to fasten the pace, but Julius won't walk any faster. It's a slow, slow, slow walk to the bottom. And it's painful.

"I could have walked down by myself," I murmur softly as we go down.

"I know that," Julius says, staring out at the open dark sky.

"I'm pretty sure you hurt your aunt's feelings," I say.

Julius shrugs. "She'll be okay."

"I'd rather you have taken her down than me," I whisper.

"Why?" Julius asks, giving me a sidelong glance.

I shrug. "Because," I say, "Why not?"

Julius ponders over my explanation for a moment, then he looks up at me with soft eyes. "Yes, indeed."

"What?" I ask as we reach the bottom, stepping on to solid land.

"Why not," Julius says more to himself than to me, and more as a statement than a question. He then leans in and whispers very softly in my ear, so close that I can feel his breath tingle my ear, "Why not."

He walks off, swinging his arms at his sides. The others are already walking ahead and he jogs to catch up with them. I am left stunned by the jet, taking in all that had just happened. I am not sure about what happened, but I am sure about one thing. And one thing only.

Julius Conta had walked away with a smirk on his lips.