1. The Other New Kid
It had been years since Zim had come to Earth, hell-bent on proving to his superiors that he was skilled and of use to the Empire. Thanks to Dib Membrane, the aspiring paranormal investigator, all he had accomplished was advancing from Middle-Skool to Hi-Skool. Dib strove to keep it that way, unchanged, until he could find a permanent solution to his unearthly nemesis.
They were halfway through the first semester of sophomore year when another new kid came to town that ended up changing the fates of these two rivals. This particular morning was a foggy one, and Dib stood alone in his trench coat, at one with his surroundings. It was expected to rain later today, and he relished any situation that decreased Zim's chances of showing up to skool. But the Irken did show up, probably on account of some incompetent weather forecast alien thing he depended on for the colder seasons.
As soon as they made eye contact, the rest of the world seemingly melted away, and all that existed now was the short distance between the two arch nemeses. Zim's eyes narrowed to hateful slits.
"Dib-scum."
Dib, having grown much taller since Zim's arrival, towered over him by at least a foot and a half. "Zim-freak." He acknowledged the Irken with a barely-there nod. Over the years, their attitudes had worsened and their mannerisms combined to become a sort of common dialect.
"I'll keep an eye on you in Physiology today, Zim," Dib warned his fellow outcast. "Don't even think about doing anything dangerous."
"Don't even think about warning your superior that is ZIM!" cried Zim in response. "It is a pointless gesture of superiority you do not have." With that said, the green-skinned, still prepubescent-looking boy adjusted what Zim knew to be a wig, and stalked off into the drab, brick-shaped building to spite his point.
"You have nothing to do in there twenty minutes before the first bell, you sassy moron." Dib spoke more to himself than the Invader at that point, feeling slighted at today's especially brazen act of animosity. However, he smirked at the thought of a melting, shrieking Zim later on if the rain came early. So using the time he had left, he began to cram for the pig dissection scheduled today.
"Alright, you horrible teenagers. As you have been foretold, the pig dissection is taking place skoolwide today. The only reason we are doing this is because our budget is doomed! ... so we have teamed up with that stupid taco or pizza place or something." Ms. Bitters spat. "Do it right, because all pigs we've been given are to be taken back to be turned into food for the entire city!"
Due to even more budget cuts, Ms. Bitters had been forced out of retirement and thrust into the unwanted position, Head of the understaffed Hi-Skool.
Dib raised his hand. "But what if someone who isn't familiar with humans, let alone PIGS, tampers with theirs? We could be talking about a massive E. coli breakout! It could spread something like Angst Swine Virus to the general public. And I'm talking about ZIm. I don't think he should be left unsupervised! His middle name is trouble!"
Zim, silently thanking Dib for the great idea, stood up indignantly and puffed out his scrawny little chest. "Zim's middle name is NOT trouble! It is... ah... a NORMAL HUMAN nickname," he faltered a bit, "with normal human syllables in it, and... whatever..." petering off under Ms. Bitter's unamused glare, he completed his thought. "That is all." Then he shot a poison-filled look at Dib, who promptly ignored him.
Ms. Bitters didn't exactly have a rebuttal for either of these problem children, so she continued her rant.
"Adding to our skool woes, the system has dumped another brat into this class. I didn't get the word in time so I couldn't tell the board supervisor that there was NO ROOM for anyone else here. So I'll be taking out my anger on you worms as always."
The class did not really respond at all. Keef, maybe, paused in the process of picking his nose and grunted his acknowledgement that she had spoken. and continued. Zita followed the path of a fly that had gotten into the room, but it was promptly crushed in the grip of the cobra-like skool head's claws. She hated every life decision that had brought her to this educational center in the present.
Then the acerbic old teacher cocked her head. "The new student..." Skittering to the door faster than humanly possible, she wrenched the security door open and revealed a runty kid poised to knock wearing shapeless clothing.
"Introduce yourself," she snarled. The class halfheartedly craned their necks to get a better view of the new kid as he... she?... stepped over the threshold with trepidation.
"Um, hi, dudes and dudines. I'm Laura. Heh."