Title: Chuck vs. Life
Author: marybr
Characters: mainly Chuck/Sarah (but the regulars are there – Casey, Ellie, Morgan, Awesome, etc.)
Chapters: 11/?
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters portrayed in this fic. I'm gaining nothing with this, except the sheer joy of being Chuck/Sarah's puppet master.
Summary: First of all I suck at summaries, so regard this fact as you read this. The fic fits right after the last episode aired (1x11), and it basically picks up after those events. It's nothing more than Chuck and co. moving on with their lives, and especially centering on how Chuck and Sarah will deal with their mutual feelings. I know, this summary blows… Just read the first chapter, and you'll get a sense of what is actually about.
A/N: Thanks for all the reviews!
Sincere apologies for the massive delay. You know, life… and laziness (to be quite frank).
On a good news, I passed the Bar exam! Thanks to those who sent me positive vibes :D
Hope you enjoy the chapter!
Chapter XI
When Sarah got home from the hospital all she wanted to do was to let her body tumble down onto her bed. She just wanted to fall asleep, so she could wake up later to realize the whole day was nothing more than a bad dream. However, when she arrived at her room, her mind was racing like there was no tomorrow. It kept playing, and re-playing the fatidic events of that night. As she took a long, hot bath, images of Chuck getting shot, and lying on a hospital gurney made their way to her mind. Even the hospital smell she had always hated so much seemed to still linger in the air.
The fact that she had to leave before Chuck had woken up didn't help to soothe this tangled, tight, heavy feeling she had on her chest. This uncomfortable feeling of uneasiness just wouldn't let her be. That's why she kept tossing and turning in bed, unable to go to sleep after having such a relaxing bath. She had to remind herself more than a couple of times that the doctor said he would be fine, that he would wake up pretty soon; but Sarah was the type of woman that liked to see things for herself. So, she reminded herself that Julia was there.
Julia would be there when he'd wake up. Julia was his girlfriend, not her. It really wasn't her prerogative to impose her presence. She was the ex, as far as the other woman was concerned. That line of thought made it even more impossible for Sarah to catch some zs.
So, Sarah found herself reaching for something inside the bottom drawer of her nightstand. She reached for her Christmas gift; the one Chuck gave to her. She opened up the photo album and started to scan the photos meticulously. She kept flipping the pages, and studying those faces in the pictures. His face, her face, their faces… they were smiling and goofing around, and those memories brought a smile to Sarah's face. Without realizing she fell asleep beside the opened up photo album.
Sarah got woken up by a shot. Surprise, surprise, she was dreaming about the shooting. She looked through the window from her bed and it was really early. The sun was barely starting to come out. She decided she had waited long enough. She needed to visit Chuck. So, she rapidly threw some clothes on, put her hair up on a ponytail, splashed some water on her face, brushed her teeth, and headed for the hospital.
Morgan was sitting on a chair by Chuck's hospital bedside when Sarah slid the glass door open. Both he and Chuck, who were chatting aimlessly at the time, looked directly at her. Morgan noticed that she was wearing a black trench coat, and pointy black high heels.
"Hey, boys," she said in a deep husky tone.
"Sarah, hi! What bring you here?" Morgan asked nonchalantly.
"Oh, I came to see Chuck…" she replied in the same tone, heading to the bottom of the bed and leaning on its rail with both hands.
"…and you," she finished in a whisper.
Morgan gulped, but his attention was shifted to the sliding glass door as someone else came through: Julia.
"Hey, Jules! You're also here," he said enthusiastically.
He took a once over at the blue eyed woman, and she was wearing the exact same trench coat as Sarah. The only difference was in the color, hers was a dark, rich caramel. Pointy caramel high heels on her feet.
"Wait. What are you doing here?" he asked her after a small pause.
"Didn't you tell me that you two broke up?" he asked Chuck turning his head around to face his long-time pal.
However, when he looked at the bed Chuck wasn't there anymore.
"Where did he…" he said more to himself than to the ladies.
The ladies weren't paying attention to him. They were staring at each other in the eye.
"Julia," Sarah said in a menacing tone.
"Sarah," Julia replied in the exact same tone.
Both women locked eyes and the tension was beyond palpable.
"What are you doing here?" the CIA agent asked.
"What are you doing here?" the lady doctor answered with a question.
Before Morgan could really grasp what was going on there, the ladies started to untie and unbutton their trench coats. Sarah and Julia took of their coats, letting them fall onto the floor, and underneath they were wearing matching Victoria Secrets baby dolls, just like the one Morgan bought Chuck for Christmas. Sarah's was black and Julia's white.
"Hey, that's my babyd…" Morgan tried to say midst a long gulp, but couldn't manage to finish the sentence.
The women now were inside this little rink that was inside of Chuck's hospital bedroom. The bedroom now appeared larger than it actually was, not that Morgan was interested in space at the moment. He slowly took a seat, if this was happening; he would damn sure enjoy the show. He sat down and wiped some drool that was dripping from his mouth.
Sarah and Julia were going around in circles inside of the rink, and after taking a better look, Morgan could tell it was full of jello. They were studying each other, preparing to make a move. Sarah was the one to initiate the attack on Julia; she went straight for the brunette's hair and started to pull on it. Julia, kind of as a reflex, started to pull on Sarah's as well. It was a major catfight, and Morgan couldn't be more turned on.
"I want Morgan," Sarah said to Julia in an angry tone.
"No! I want Morgan," Julia replied in the same edgy tone.
"Why do you always want to take what I want?" the blonde yelled, taking the brunette down.
They rolled around in jello, attacking one another.
"He's mine," the lady doctor said.
"I'll show you what is yours," the agent said mounting on top of the blue eyed brunette.
"Dude, this is so hot! I can't believe…" Morgan said excited when someone entered through the glass door.
"Morgan! What is going on here?"" Anna yelled rushing towards her boyfriend.
Morgan woke up startled. He was sitting on a chair by Chuck's hospital bedside.
"Hey there, buddy. You dozed off for a few minutes," Chuck said softly.
Morgan situated himself; of course that had to be a dream. He looked at his friend lying in bed, and in front of Chuck there was this food tray with two empty jello cups, and one half full. There they were in all their glory: his dream trigger.
"Hey, sorry about that, dude. I remember now… We were talking about the awesomeness of jello, and," the bearded friend started to say.
"And my love life… or lack thereof," Chuck self-deprecatingly said.
Another trigger, Morgan thought; but he shook off the remains of the dream to help up his best friend.
"Well, it's ok, buddy. Julia was a fine, fine lady," he said a little bit too gushingly as Chuck shot him a 'watch-out' look, and started to finish eating the remaining half full jello cup.
Morgan took the hint.
"But when it's not meant to be, it's not meant to be," he finished trying to sound wise.
Like on queue the sliding glass door opened up to reveal none other than Sarah. She walked in the room in a pair of dark blue jeans, a plain white tee, a high ponytail, and a bright smile; and Chuck couldn't remember ever seeing her look so beautiful. He put the jello cup slowly down, and took a deep breath, as she walked over to his bedside.
Sarah entered the room and saw Chuck seating up talking to Morgan; she was so happy to see him awake that, absently to her will, a bright smile made its way to her features. As she made her way to his bedside, she quickly noticed that color had returned to his face, unlike how he looked when they first brought him here to the hospital.
"Hey," she said softly maintaining the same bright smile.
"Hi," he replied smiling brightly back.
They stared at each other in the eyes for a few seconds. It was like there were only the two of them in the room. Without saying a word both knew they needed to be alone to talk.
"Hey, Morgan. Could you track down a nurse and see if I can get an extra pillow?" Chuck asked his friend without losing eye contact with Sarah.
Morgan was quite aware of what his friend was really asking him.
"Oh, sure. I hear you; I'll go find you an 'extra pillow', pal," he replied with a wink.
Sarah nodded a hello to Morgan as he was leaving the room, to which he reciprocated. She also did so without losing eye contact with Chuck.
In a matter of seconds Morgan was out of the picture.
"So," Chuck let out.
"Are you feeling alright?" she asked concerned.
"Yeah, I'm fine. What is a little bullet in the abdomen, right?" he joked light hearted.
She smiled, and after a while she looked around the room.
"Where's Ellie?" she asked a little self-conscious.
The truth was she was nervous. She didn't know exactly what to say, or what emotions she could display at that moment. She was more than aware that there was, and there would ever be, a line between herself and Chuck. A line of ethics and professionalism that, given the nature of their relationship, she could never cross. However, somewhere along the way, the line started to get blurrier by the day. Her feelings towards her protégé could be accountant of causing said blur. And last night she got the undeniable proof of that. So, she would have to be more careful from now on.
Chuck was a bit confused by her interest in small talk when clearly there were more important things they needed to hash out, but for now he would oblige.
"Oh, Ellie went home an hour ago to take a shower and get me some stuff, you know, like decent pajamas. These hospital gowns are the least dignified pieces of clothing known by men. I can't even move in fear of flashing perfect strangers," he said smiling.
She genuinely smiled. She wanted to ask where Julia was, but the courage didn't come to her.
A few seconds went by in silence. Chuck started to get the feeling that, if he didn't bring up the topic of what happened and what was said at the night of the shooting, Sarah wouldn't. So, he mustered up some courage.
"Well, Ellie filled me in on what happened. You know, what led to me getting shot," he tested the waters.
Sarah looked blindsided, and nervous. She shifted on the chair that she was now sitting on. She took a good look at Chuck who seemed quite calm to her, and stood up heading to a nearby small table that had a plastic jar of water and plastic glasses on it.
"Are you thirsty? I can get you some water," she said facing away from him, and pouring some water in the glass.
"No, I'm good. I'm full with all this wonderful jello I ate; the only good thing about being sick by the way. Besides getting to stay in bed and watch tv all day without feeling guilty about it, of course," he replied nonchalantly.
Sarah stayed facing away from Chuck; she didn't even smile at his musing, that's how nervous she was.
"It's a good thing that she did, you know. 'Cause otherwise I would have no idea that someone tried to rob us while I was doing you a favor by escorting you to your friend's party," he delivered rather mockingly.
There would be no way of her escaping this conversation, he thought.
He just won't let this go, she thought.
"I thought you would be here when I woke up, you know, to secure the cover-up story at least," he added with a tad of resentment in his voice.
As much as Sarah had to maintain a distance, and not show her true feelings for Chuck, she couldn't let him believe this. So, she turned around and faced him.
"I wanted to be here. I wanted to stay and wait for you to wake up, and it wasn't to secure our cover. I wanted to make sure you were ok. You really scared me, you know. Don't do that again," she honestly said.
He couldn't stop a tiny grin from taking over his lips.
"But," he interjected to make her keep going.
"But your… girlfriend," she still had trouble pronouncing that.
"Julia came by and I didn't want to mess things up for you," she added staring at her shoes.
"Our cover story was damaging enough," she finished awkwardly.
"She broke up with me," he blurted out.
"What?!" the blonde asked.
"Julia ended her relationship with me," he rephrased.
"I got that," she said a little annoyed by his evading tactic.
"But why? I can go to her and explain that you were doing me a favor, and…" she tried eagerly.
"It's fine. It wasn't because of the cover story, anyway," he cut her.
"Why then?" she asked a bit intrigued.
It was Chuck's turn to get self-conscious. He didn't want to say it was because of Sarah, because of what Julia thought he felt for the blonde. Maybe he didn't want to scare the agent, but it was probably a self-defense move, you know, avoiding being in that uncomfortable vulnerable position.
"It doesn't matter right now," he deflected interrupting eye contact for a few seconds.
Sarah noticed that. She was trained to pick up on those little tells, but she didn't know what that tell was telling. Being an agent wasn't as helpful as she'd like it to be when it came to the matters of the heart.
"What it really matters here is what happened in the mission," he said deciding to cut to the chase.
It's time to stop beating around the bush, he thought.
"Well, it was really successful. Fuller is dead, and we have the artifact back," she promptly delivered.
"I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about what we were discussing right before I got shot," he said a little louder than he intended to.
A chill ran through Sarah's spine. This was what she had feared. She broke down eye contact.
"Specifically what you said to me right before I passed out," he finished confidently.
"I don't know what you're talking about," she said right away.
She knew.
She knew quite well what he was talking about. In a moment of truth she admitted her feelings for Chuck. She expected him not to have heard that. She hoped he had not heard that: her moment of weakness. However, it was pretty clear he heard every single word of her "I do".
"Yes, you do. I could have lost a lot of blood at that time, but I know what I heard. You admitted you have feelings for me," he simply put it.
Sarah was nervous; she had to stick to her denial.
"I don't know what you think you've heard, but I have never said that," she lied with a straight face.
Chuck snored.
"I can't believe you're denying this," he said shaking his head.
"There's nothing to deny. Nothing has been said," she insisted on the lie.
"Are you seriously going to stick with this?" he asked in disbelief.
Sarah shrugged in response.
Both knew their exchange was starting to sound too juvenile.
"That's really…" he tried to say but was interrupted by the glass door sliding open.
Ellie entered the room carrying a small luggage in one hand and a flower bouquet in the other.
"Hey, Sarah! Nice of you to drop by to visit Chuck," she said leaving the stuff on a chair, and hugging the blonde woman.
"Hi! Yeah, I came to see if he was feeling ok," the agent replied hugging back.
After they finished hugging, the brunette looked from the blonde to her brother and she could tell that she had walked in on something.
"Am I interrupting something?" she asked hopeful with a smile on her face.
Ellie thought they might have been working things out. Chuck had told her earlier about Julia breaking up with him. Plus she always knew her brother's heart belonged to Sarah.
Chuck was about to say something, but Sarah was quicker.
"No. Not really. We were just talking, nothing important," she said trying to keep a smile on her face.
She looked from Ellie to Chuck and could tell he wasn't happy with that.
"Actually I was just about to leave. I have an early shift," she added.
"Already? Can't you stay for a while longer?" Ellie tried.
"I really can't. If I miss one more early shift I might get fired," she said smiling light hearted.
"Ok, then. Thank you for stopping by, right Chuck?" the brunette prompted her brother.
"Yeah, sure. Thank you, Sarah," he said with enough sarcasm so Sarah could pick up on.
And she picked up on that alright. It didn't feel good. Sarah was about to leave the room when she turned around to Chuck.
"I'm really glad you're ok, Chuck," she said in a low tone, looking directly at him.
Without waiting for an answer she exited through the sliding glass door. She felt emotionally exhausted. Chuck saw Sarah leaving the room and felt frustrated, but touched by her last-minute caring display. Sarah wouldn't make this easy on him; but again when she ever did? However, Chuck knew what he had heard on that previous tragic night, and for once he knew exactly how Sarah felt for him. And the fact that she actually had feelings for him at all made him feel good inside. For now that fact was enough. He would give her time… for now.
A/N: I wasn't about to write any interactions between Julia and Sarah post-breakup, but since many of you were interested in reading it I adapted the idea a bit. The reason I didn't want to write it was because I couldn't see a point for it. Because the only point I could see was Julia telling Sarah Chuck was into her still, or Sarah telling Julia Chuck is a great guy. The first option didn't work for me, 'cause I didn't want it to be Julia the one who pointed out to Sarah Chuck's feelings, or opened up her eyes to her (Sarah's) feelings for Chuck. I think it will be best if Sarah sees that for herself, and makes the move on her own, instead of being "pushed" by someone else. The second option was already done with that Lou girl, and I ain't no copycat (not intentionally at least).
Other thing that I'd like to say is about the dream sequence. Come on! Everyone knows that it isn't really "Chuck" (the show) without the Powers That Be putting the girl who plays Sarah (forgot the actress name, and can't be bothered to google it right now) in some gratuitous show-of-skin scene. That actress sure is a great sport! So, I just followed tradition :D