Justin had no idea what this 'thing' with Brian would turn out to be.
He knew that he liked Brian. A lot.
He knew that Brian was weird. Very weird.
So he tried to keep his expectations to a minimum, and go with the flow.
After the first night they had sex, Justin woke up to find Brian had already left for work, leaving behind detailed instructions for Justin on how to lock up when leaving. So Justin left.
He emailed Brian and told him that he had had a great time, and just as he had expected, Brian didn't respond for two days. That was fine by Justin, because Brian had taken eleven days to contact him the first time round.
On the second day, he texted Justin late in the afternoon, asking whether he was planning on eating the Thai food that was ordered for him, and if not, Brian was going to throw it out.
Justin understood the text to say what it didn't actually say. He told Brian that he was going swimming after work, and that he'd come over after that.
They had sex that night, and Justin spent the night at Brian's place.
Justin waited a day before asking Brian if he wanted to grab a bite to eat. 'Busy' was the one word response Justin received, and he was cool with that.
He knew how to play a long innings.
He knew Brian would want more, he just had to keep Brian's pace.
It took Brian until the following Thursday to ask him if he wanted to come over, and Justin decided that it was as good a time as any to play a little hard to get. Yes, he wanted to come over. But he also wanted to go dancing. Did Brian want to perhaps hit a club first?
Turned out Brian did. Turned out they had to eat first, before hitting a club.
Turned out that going on a date with Brian wasn't so hard after all, so long as he didn't tell Brian that it was a date.
Before he knew it, they established a routine.
Thursday: evening dinner, clubbing, sex, sleeping over at Brian's.
Friday: going to work, meeting for dinner, clubbing, sex, sleeping over at Brian's.
Saturday: waking up at noon, going out for brunch or Justin embarking on a cooking adventure, depending on how hungover they were, and random afternoon activities that ended with dinner, clubbing and sex.
Justin made sure to leave Brian's place by Sunday afternoon. Brian got crazy jittery, and the first weekend they had spent together, made a crack about Justin almost living at his place. It had been just three days and two nights, but Justin just pretended to not hear Brian. He recognised commitment-phobia when he saw it. He had been a bit scared that Brian would totally bail, but when Thursday came around, they had plans to have dinner together.
They'd email and text each other on the days they didn't see each other, but Justin had no clue what Brian was up to for those days in terms of other men. He didn't ask. Brian had issues, and Justin was not going to press his luck just yet.
The first real sign he got that Brian cared about him, in his own weird way, was in the middle of June, when they were having dinner.
"What are you up to next week?"
"I have to finish the CGI for the Acrylex ad, which is taking way longer than I expected. I have to somehow get that done by Tuesday, or Wednesday the latest. And there's this Swedish indie movie about exchange students and prostitutes, and I might have to go for that shoot. Kinda excited about that one…do you want come for the shoot?"
"I'm away next week."
It struck Justin that Brian had only asked about his week so that Brian could tell Justin about his.
"Yeah? Where are you off to?"
"Pittsburgh. Have to pretend to be a father, friend, such assorted bullshit."
"Oh. When are you back?" For a nano second, Justin's heart leapt to unmeasurable heights, thinking that Brian was going to ask him to join. Then reality kicked in, and Justin figured that this was Brian's way of letting him know that nothing was going to happen between them next week.
"Leaving Sunday afternoon, and getting back in the following Monday evening."
"That's a good stretch…you'll have plenty of time to sort out assorted bullshit." Justin wanted to say that he'll miss Brian, but he kept that thought to himself.
"Since you have no real plans, I think you should just stay at my place while I'm gone. It'll be an improvement for you, because my place is infinitely better than yours."
Justin frowned. Brian lived in a condo with plenty of security, and he had no pets.
"You want me to stay at your place while you're gone?"
"Yeah…check on the cleaning lady, make sure she doesn't fuck anything up, and you can finish all that food in the fridge. And there's left over wine as well."
"Ummm…sure, why not?"
Justin couldn't figure out Brian's logic, but he said ok because he didn't want to refuse for no reason. Just because he didn't understand why, didn't mean that Brian didn't have a good reason. Justin's best guess was that Brian thought he'd be safer at Brian's place than his own. Or maybe he felt closer if Justin was at his place.
Or maybe he thought Justin wouldn't go out and find himself another man, when he was sleeping in Brian's bed.
All three theories made Justin happy.
The irregular texts from Brian during his Pittsburgh holiday also made Justin happy.
Brian cutting his trip short and coming back early Saturday evening made Justin very happy.
Brian hadn't told him that he was coming; Justin was watching a movie, and had fallen asleep on the couch. He woke up to Brian kissing him, and thought that he was dreaming.
"Brian? You're…what are you doing here?"
"I got bored." More kissing. "I missed New York." More kissing.
"Are you tired? Hungry? You wanna go get food?" More kissing.
"Make something for me later. For now, just…" Brian started removing his clothes, climbing on top of him.
In between kissing, Brian whispered "I might have missed you too."
It was late July when Brian tried his dinner question trick again.
"What are you up to next week?"
Justin tried very hard to keep his face neutral.
"I'm shopping for socks. I think I need new ones."
Brian gave him a withering glare.
"I told you last week. I'm doing another show at Joe's Pub Friday evening."
"You most certainly did not tell me that. You said 27th."
"Meaning, then, that I did tell you. And I told you that it was the 20th. You're growing old and losing your memory."
This time, Brian's glare could kill, and he seemed genuinely irritated. Justin was surprised; he teased Brian often enough without Brian getting riled.
"Well, what the fuck ever. Have fun shopping for socks and singing about it. I'm having guests over from Tuesday evening, so you're going to have to keep away and entertain yourself."
"Uh-huh. Who are these guests?"
"Michael and his professor partner Ben."
Justin knew that Michael and Brian had gone to school together since middle school; Michael's mother had practically raised Brian. And Ben was Michael's husband. 'Zen Ben', as Brian referred to him privately.
Justin was disappointed that Brian wasn't going to come to the pub, and that he was being shooed away, instead of being introduced to Brian's oldest friend in the world, but he kept his game face on. "Are they coming for a holiday?"
"Some conference Ben has to attend. Who the fuck knows. The boring lives of boring people."
"Oh well. Have fun with that." He made sure to not act the least bit perturbed.
At least he tried.
Justin corresponded with Brian as always that week, knowing that they wouldn't be seeing each other. He tried to act cool, unaffected and normal.
When Wednesday rolled around, he barely heard from Brian.
When Thursday came, he received not one response from Brian.
When it was Friday afternoon, Brian messaged him, asking that he reserve a table for Brian plus two at Joe's Pub.
Apparently, Brian and his friends were going to see his show after all.
When his performance was done, Brian told him to come and join them, introducing him to Michael and Ben. Introductions were simple – 'this is Justin'. He was cool with that.
He just followed Brian's lead, and didn't initiate anything that Brian might have a problem with. Michael and Ben were incredibly nice and friendly, which helped. Brian was incredibly physical, keeping Justin very close to him, which also helped. A lot.
They went for dinner – not that Brian asked him to join, not that he told him to join, he just had his arm firmly around Justin's waist, steering him. They went to a club after, got blissfully drunk, and when it was time to give the cabbie directions, Brian just gave one address.
Justin spent the weekend at Brian's, and if Michael or Ben wondered as to who or what he exactly was, they kept their questions to themselves.