So this chapter is both a little short and a bit of a bummer and for that I apologize. The next one will be happier. I just wanted to get their backstories out so I could reference them later and you'll know which version of their stories I am using. I did take a few liberties with the stories so they won't be exactly what you may know from the movies or comics but they should be pretty close.
Natasha hesitated before answering. She was dying to know what brought him to his current life; maybe she had found someone like herself, but she didn't want to make him say anything that might make him uncomfortable with her.
"If you're ready." Was the safest thing she could think to say.
"Someone ought to know."
She thought he might have changed his mind because he didn't speak for a while.
"I killed my brother. I mean, I didn't want to. And I didn't know right away. I-" he paused and sighed. "I did love him."
Natasha sat silently letting him work through his thoughts.
"My parents moved us to a farm in Iowa and he, Barney, was my only friend. My dad drank a lot. He- he and my mom died in a car accident when I was little. I don't remember them much but I do remember that my mom used to sing a lot. Anyway, after they died my brother and I were put in an orphanage. That was the worst place. We rarely ate and when we did we didn't get enough. Barney, trying to cheer me up, snuck us into a circus. It was the most marvelous thing I remember from my childhood. One of the few times I was happy after my parents died. I never wanted that to end. I think it was the same for Barney. We ran away with the circus. Trickshot and The Swordsman taught me what I know and I became a big attraction for the circus. Barney and I had never eaten so well.
"Eventually I realized Trickshot and The Swordsman were running some sort of scam. Stealing from the audience and planning big heists. I tried to stop them but they wouldn't listen. I was going to call the cops but when they threatened me I didn't even think. I shot them with the bow I was holding. They were the first people I ever killed. I heard a voice coming from the tent talking about the heist they had been planning and I was so scared I didn't recognize the voice. I just shot. Barney fell so quickly it didn't seem real. It took me awhile to figure it out but I pieced together that he was part of the crew stealing from people. It was how he afforded food for us. He was doing it all to protect me. I remember realizing it was him and I tried to save him. I sat with him until someone pulled me away. I don't remember who it was. I was 17 when he-" Clint paused to catch his breath, fighting tears. "I kind of fell into a dark spiral, drinking and hanging around bad people. I killed. A lot. I had no morals, no reason to do anything. That's when S.H.I.E.L.D. found me. It took me a while to come around to them but they helped me."
He brushed a tear off his cheek and stared out at the trees. Natasha was quiet for a while, surprised at how similar their stories actually were. Clint looked at her with surprise when she started her story.
"I was three when I joined the ballet. I remember being praised. I remember people clapping for me when I danced. It might have been my parents but I don't really remember their faces. The other girls were jealous of me, tried to hurt me, but the instructors protected me. They told the others I was a prodigy.
"One day a man came up to me and asked if I wanted to come train with him. He said I would become famous for my skills but only if I went to live with him and his other girls. My dance teacher was crying and said that these people were powerful and that I should be careful. Only looking back did I realize they were afraid. I said that my parents would miss me if I left them. That's when our house burned down. I cried and ran to my ballet teacher but the men found me. After that all I ever did was dance and learn to fight.
"The other girls were still jealous of me but I didn't see much of them outside of the ballet lessons. Those were a cover, of course, but they did teach us. The rest was languages and guns and combat. When our skills were good enough we would go through a graduation of sorts. There was a surgery. But I think you know about that." Clint nodded but didn't interrupt. "We got our first assignment a week later. I was thirteen."
Natasha was startled by Clint's hand over her own. She didn't pull away, fighting every instinct she had to do just that. The two sat together waiting for their tears to dry. The sun set and still they sat silently side by side. Only when security passed through did they return to the car and Clint's apartment.