A/N: I'm sorry about how short the last two chapter were. They were sort of necessary and I didn't really want to shove them together just to make one longer one, it didn't feel right. Hopefully this one will make up for that shortcoming though! As always, thanks to my wonderful reviewers. Merry Christmas!

Forgotten
Chapter 14: Forgotten

One Year Later…

Shuichi spent two Christmas's and his twenty-second birthday in the hospital. His recovery was spent being tested, mastering muscle control, speech development, memory exercises, regaining the life he had forgotten.

He was one of the lucky ones. He could recall his most pleasant and, perhaps not so lucky, his most painful memories. He could recall the majority of his schooling; the day his dad had left, the day he and Hiro had first fought, the day they had created Bad Luck and all of their aspirations to become stars. He could remember graduation, being signed to NG, meeting Ryuichi Sakuma in person on stage at his first concert. Most importantly, he could remember almost everything about Eiri. The day they met, their first kiss, the first time they made love, every fight was a painful niche in his memory, every kiss a pang of pleasure. His life with his lover was the clearest part of his memory.

And the last fight… the night that all of it had begun… it stood out clearest in his mind, pushing to the forefront of his thought every time he had a moment of repose, a chance to be alone and think. There were many unanswered questions. Questions he wouldn't dare ask at such a crucial time in both their lives. Eiri was distraught, barely hiding his nerves under a carefully composed mask he wore continuously around Shuichi. The singer guessed that Yuki was trying to put up a strong front, to not let Shuichi's recovery be hindered even minutely by anything. In a way it was sweet, but also frustrating. An entire year of their lives was spent in this fake happiness, discussing the good times and ignoring the bad like they had never happened.

After a year had passed from the day he'd woken up in this hospital, the surgery a success, he was due to be released. Today was that day and Shuichi looked forward to it with glee and anxiety, happiness and dread mixed all in one, leaving his stomach twisted in knots. Eiri had picked out one of Shuichi's favorite outfits for him to come home in, Hiro brought Ryuichi's actual Mr. Bear as a present from the Nittle Grasper singer himself, and Tohma brought a luxurious stretch limo and privacy, using his connections to keep the paparazzi away from the hospital and Eiri's apartment for a five block radius.

"Mr. Shindo," Dr. Kuroi and Tabemono said together as they entered his room. "It's time."

He nodded and stood up, Eiri holding out his arm for support, and retreated to the bathroom to change.

Standing in front of the plain mirror in his bathroom, Shuichi examined his body. His face was sallow, gaunt and sickly compared to his countenance before, the skin on his arms and legs clung tightly to the bone. It was apparent that he had been sick, but that was over now, and he could return to life before. He hoped.

The outfit felt like it was a size to big, but diffidently tighter than the loose and papery flannel hospital gown he'd been given to wear for the last year. He raked his fingers through his short, dark hair, hoping it would grow quickly so he could restore it to it's original form. He sighed and stood a little straighter. Now was the time to return to the world, whole, complete, and alive. He stepped out of the bathroom and smiled at the group assembled. Eiri's façade nearly broke down, but he managed to hold it together and smile pleasantly. Hiro and Tohma's grins were much more pronounced. They all smile and beckoned him forward.

Eiri's arms enveloped him in their first deep hug in over a year. "Are you ready?"

"Yes."

They broke apart and Eiri's exotic golden eyes met Shuichi's glittering purple. "Let's go home."

Shuichi smiled widely, a true grin reaching his lips and his eyes. "Sounds good."

The walked together down the hallway. Shuichi reached the front desk and stood there with a sense of triumph. He'd beaten his illness. He'd won.

"Here you are, darling." Said a motherly nurse at the desk, handing him a packet of forms. He signed each slowly, relishing the feeling of his freedom being handed to him mark by mark. As he finished and turned to the front door, he could see the streets of Tokyo beyond the plated glass. Boldly he took the first step, leaving Eiri, Hiro, and Tohma to follow behind. Together they reached the limo and climbed in and the driver started the car, beginning their journey forward. Shuichi held tightly to his lover's hand. The world seemed different to him, strange and foreign, previously felt only by memories he could barely grasp.

Hiro couldn't stop smiling, Eiri couldn't stop fidgeting, and Tohma couldn't stop sighing. They made their journey in comfortable tension, the anticipation of Shuichi's reintroduction into life weighing heavily on each of them.

Eiri's apartment building came into view. They stopped just outside of it and clamored out together, straightening jackets and shirts and laughing half-heartedly at nothing in particular. As they made their way up the walk Eiri subtly handed Shuichi the key to the apartment and he took it with shaking hands. The last time he had been here, he'd lain down in the exact spot he was standing, shaking and puking, sick beyond all imagination, crying and cold and too weak to pull a jacket over himself. This time was different. He could feel the new life beginning.

The key fit easily into the lock. He turned it. It clicked. With a slow, deliberate movement he pushed open the door to face the home he hadn't seen in over a year.

"SURPRISE!"

He jumped back into Eiri's arms and was met with deep laughter by his lover. In wonder he stood and watched Eiri laugh, the rare action reverberating in his consciousness. He saved it away as his first wonderful memory during this second chapter of life, and then turned to face the screaming and clapping and laughing masses of his friends and family.

His mother and sister and some aunts and uncles and cousins, his grandparents both on his mother's and father's side of the family. Suguru, K, Sakano, Mika, Ryuichi, Noriko, Tatsuha. And of course, Hiro and Tohma standing behind him with Eiri, his greatest support at his side.

The room was decorated in banners, balloons, streamers. Each balloon bundle held five round balloons with the words 'Welcome Home' decorating them in great looping letters. The streamers stretched from each corner of the room, curling around the ceiling and the walls. And the banner, it looked as though it had been hand-written, and each person in attendance had signed their name on it's surface. Some had even drawn small pictures and cartoons.

He smiled and clapped and laughed along with them, delighted to see and in some ways meet his family and friends. He hugged them all tenderly, talking to them each in great detail, saving these moments forever.

Eiri stood close by at all times, but remained quiet throughout the party. A silent partner. For now, Shuichi thought, they would have to be content with this semblance of normalcy they had built for themselves. But soon, very soon, they were going to have to talk.

That night, after his homecoming, Shuichi sat on the living room couch with Eiri's arms around his shoulders. Together they watched a TV movie, a silly comedy about a man who lived in an airport. Then suddenly during a commercial break, Eiri stood and held out his hand for Shuichi to take. The singer, confused, grasped his lovers hand and was brought to his feet. In a slow but unexpected movement Eiri pulled him close and kissed him softly and sweetly, into a more chaste kiss than the lovers had ever had.

"Come with me. I have a surprise for you." Eiri said quietly in his deep voice. He led the singer down the hallway. Outside one of the guest bedrooms he stopped and turned to his lover. "Close your eyes." He said.

Shuichi bit his lower lip in apprehension, but did as he was told. Taking both of Shuichi's hands in his Eiri led his lover into the room and turned on the lights.

"Alright," Eiri said, berating himself for allowing his nerves to show through his cracking voice. "Open them."

Shuichi did, and nearly fell to the floor in amazement. Eiri clutched him close, holding the greater portion of his body weight as the singer gasped for air in shock, and then began to cry.

The guest bedroom had been converted into a large office. Along the back wall was the window, beneath it a long table that stretched from one corner of the room to the other, covered in notebooks, sketchbooks, pencils and pens and coloring tools and art supplies galore. One corner had a small loveseat couch and a plush armchair and ottoman set. A set of three bookshelves, all empty at that moment, covered the remainder of the left wall while a huge desk covered the right, furnished with a computer monitor, mouse, speakers, and keyboard. The computer chair was dark, squashy leather, exactly like the one in Yuki's own study.

Shuichi gripped Yuki's shirt and stared into the beautiful room. It was sophisticated and funky at the same time, surprisingly just his style. The chairs were a sparsely polka dotted green and blue, the furniture a dark wood, and artfully framed posters of Nittle Grasper and Bad Luck hung on the walls, as well as one enlarged photo of himself and Yuki together, smiling and happy.

"Oh my God… Yuki. It's beautiful."

"Glad you like it." He kissed the top of the singers head with extreme caution, though the incision and scar on his scalp had been healed for months. "But it's mine. Stay out."

Shuichi looked up at Eiri, about to protest vigorously and take the man out of the gorgeous room and into the hall for a serious beat down. But his eyes met Yuki's and he saw the laughter being held inside. He smacked the older man's arm gently and kissed him. "You asshole."

"Hey, don't blame me for your gullibility."

Shuichi laughed and kissed him again. "I love it. You have absolutely no idea."

"Good."

Shuichi hugged Yuki tightly around the middle and continued to stare at his new favorite room in the house. He thought for a moment as he stood and absorbed, and then took his lovers hand in his and led him to the loveseat. Yuki followed without objecting, and sat with his tiny singer half in his lap and half on the chair.

"I want to talk with you." Shuichi said quietly, still holding tightly to Yuki's hand.

"Alright."

Shuichi blinked. He'd been expecting more resistance. "About… when this started."

Eiri nodded. "I figured you would."

"Why did you leave?"

Eiri was about to launch into his explanation of the previous year, but he caught sight of Shuichi's shimmering eyes and stopped himself, forced himself to reanalyze the story he'd lived and the reality he'd created around it. He sighed and pulled his fingers through his hair.

"Yuki…"

"Hold on. I'm thinking."

With more patience than Eiri thought Shuichi would ever be capable of handling, they sat in silence as Eiri thought deeply about the November that started it all.

"I would like to think that I left because you were driving me insane. Every day you were there, in my home, in my life, in my head, in me. But if I'm being honest with you and with myself, I don't think that was the real reason."

"What was it then?"

"Fear."

Shuichi remained silent as he waited for Yuki to continue.

"I'm afraid of falling for you, Shuichi. I'm afraid of spending the rest of my life with you. Not because I don't want to," the author quickly amended as he caught sight of the hurt flashing behind Shuichi's purple eyes. "But because I wasn't sure I could handle that kind of commitment."

Yuki paused for a long moment and took several deep breaths. His heart was pounding like a foolish love-struck teenager. Shuichi stroked his cheek softly and then kissed his jaw. "I told Nakano that after you got better, I would leave. I told him that I didn't deserve you—which is mostly true—and that I would see you well again and then disappear."

"But you didn't." Shuichi pointed out.

"No, I didn't. For selfish reasons, really, because I truly believe you could do better than me. I'm a bastard, and asshole, through and through. You could have any prince charming that would treat you so much better than I ever will. But I realized while you were sick that I really do… love you." Eiri gulped after he uttered those two small words.

Shuichi smiled. "I love you too."

Eiri's silence was far longer than the last. Shuichi waited patiently as his lover regained his composure and continued. "When there was that possibility that you could be… dying… I felt like my life was falling apart. I realized that there is no life without you for me. If you died, I'd follow close behind."

"No!" Shuichi exclaimed suddenly, scrambling to face his lover and ending up sitting awkwardly on his lap. "You have to promise me that if I ever, ever die before you do that you will wait for you're life to end of natural causes. I won't have you killing yourself because of me!"

"We'll see." Yuki said sadly. "Can't you understand how it felt though? You were being taken away from me after just two years. To lose you so soon… I can't take another heart break like that again and survive. I'm not sure my body would let me, even if I wanted to continue living."

Shuichi stuck out his lower lip, unhappy with the iffy answer he'd received, but he deciding to let the matter drop… for now.

"Anyway, I left because I was afraid. When I'm afraid I… hide… behind this fake anger that kind of grows inside of me until I'm just generally pissed off at the whole world. When I came back home and found you that anger had grown enough that I didn't really give a shit about whether you were sick or not, but knowing now what I didn't know then, it was a horrible thing to do to you. I don't see how you could possibly forgive me."

Shuichi smoothed the shoulders of Eiri's black button-up and smiled crookedly. "I can probably forgive… eventually, but I will never forget."

Eiri nodded. "I'm always hurting you."

"No," Shuichi said softly. "Not always." And he leant forward to touch his lips to Eiri's in a gentle kiss. The two men sat comfortably, Eiri's wide hands massaging circles into Shuichi's back, Shuichi's small fingers winding nimbly into Eiri's hair, lips moving ceaselessly against each other until Shuichi broke the kiss and smiled.

"I think I've learned a little more about our life together." Eiri said in a gravelly voice, his tone husky from the kiss. "I think I know how my moods changes are interpreted. I'm going to try my hardest to stop hurting you, because I can't lose you…"

"I'm not going anywhere." Shuichi whispered.

"Thank God." Eiri replied.

The singer bent down for another kiss, putting a more insistent pressure into it this time. He threw his arms completely around his lovers shoulders, twined his fingers into the thick golden hair once again, moaning slightly at the feeling of having his body pressed fully against Eiri's. The older man growled, the sound like a purr coming straight from his chest.

"I missed you." Shuichi said, his voice muffled by Eiri's insistent lips on his own.

"I missed you more." Eiri replied.

The End

A/N: Epilogue to follow. It's not really going to be a part of the story, mostly just a commentary about how everything wrapped up for everyone in the months following Shuichi's homecoming. Very short. I hope you have enjoyed this story and I look forward to writing many more in the future. Thanks so much, everyone, for your continuous support and reviews. Special thanks to moon71, whose six review streak at one point in the development in the story gave me the drive to keep at it. I owe you my gratitude for helping me birth these last few chapters!