You guys have good questions but I can't answer them cos it'll ruin the plot if thats any help... which it isn't... but hey ho...
I know the last chappy wasn't very good & it didn't get many reviews compared to my others :(
So thanks a lot to Rosiee Posiee, LaughKittyKatForEver, qwertyuiop098, Trampy Mouse & xHoHuMpIgSbUmx who took the time to review! This chappy is dedicated to you 5! and it's a bit fluffy if that's a clue ;)
Hope you enjoy! Horn's out! ;)
"Jelloidness-a-go-go"
It's Jas and Rosie...
"So let me get this right," I said, "You want me to tell Dave everything that has happened between us... EVER?"
I don't want him to know that I was a red bottomed minx under the influences of the horn.
1 second later
Definitely not telling Dave.
That is final.
Final as a final thing can be on a final day in final universe.
Tuesday November 22nd
11a.m
Blodge
Dissecting... stuff
Now what is the point of blodge? It is clearly not going to help me with my future. My ambitions do not involve dissecting bits of frog and that is le fact.
Jas is refusing to do anything. She has taken her wise woman of the forestness to new levels. Well actually she has taken it to new corners. As in the corner of the classroom. Apparently from there she "cannot witness the monstrosity of the class's behaviour".
1 minute later
This is disgusting. D-i-s-g-u-s-t-i-n-g.
Rosie seems like she's having fun. But its kinda hard to tell with the evil glares she keeps throwing me. Her and Jas still haven't forgiven me.
But they are wrong not me.
It's just common sense not to tell Dave our history. Although apparently to Jas and Rosie I'm now the "evil liar" which is worse than having the horn. According to them. But what do they know? They've never had successful relationships.
2 seconds later
Oh no wait that's not true. They are actually the ONLY ones who've ever had a successful relationship.
Merde.
30 seconds later
Still, they don't understand Dave like I do.
Lunch
Still being ignored by the Voley and Viking Ones.
They have formed their own naff group and have even moved to a different knicker toaster. This is serious.
Mabs got out a bag of cheesy puffs and said, "What's up with them?"
I shrugged, "Oh you know this and that."
Jools folded her arms, "Like what?"
"Err like... like issues with their Oldies and worried about dissected creatures and Viking troubles and hating me, can I have a crisp?"
1 second later
Jools, Mabs and Ellen are staring at me like agog things.
Ellen said, "What do you err... I mean erm,why would they... err, are you sure?"
Oh pantyhose I do not have the patience for Ellen's stuttering stuttyness right now.
"Basically they want me to tell Dave EVERYTHING, like EVERTHING, but I don't want to so apparently I'm now out of the Viking Queen's favour and all the voles want to eat me."
That pretty much sums it up. I said it loudly so Jas and Rosie could hear. They just glared some more then went back to being all aloney on their stupid knicker toaster.
Mabs is frowning. Ahh crap I hope she's not on their side.
"But you're not going to say anything to Dave?"
I shook my head.
4.00pm
Rehearsals
Miss Wilson made us go through the whole play fandango today. Which is another way of saying I have done nothing but sat backstage and messed around.
I would much rather be elsewhere. Well actually I wouldn't because Dave is here and I'd rather be with Dave. He made me (and by that I mean asked once and I agreed instantly) dress him up in as many clothes as possible. Like Joey does on Friends. He can't move his arms or legs or neck or any part of his body right now. He has to roll around to get places. It's so funny Ellen has been knocked off her feet at least three times. That girl does not learn.
5 minutes later
Oh what larks, Jas has just fallen off the stage after trying to make a dramatic exit. Tip top hilariosity. She stalked past me and Dave in a vair big huff. It was tres amusant. Her face was all tomato looking like Vati when he eats too many chips. Haha!
15 minutes later
Walking home
Just. It took this long just to get Dave out all his clothes. Oo-er!
Jas and Tom have gone looking at some nature crisis. So joys unbounded for them.
Rosie and Sven are... doing what they normally do – snogging each other's faces off. There is no way they are only at number 8 on the snogging scale. But I can't really ask Rosie now she will bite my head off. Literally.
5 minutes later
Just me and Dave walking now. He casually linked his arm in mine and my heart went all jelloid. I managed to stay upright though. Just about.
"So," he said after a bit, "I heard some interesting news the other day."
"Oh yeah?" I said moving a tad closer to him in a sneaky way. "What's that?"
He grinned and looked straight ahead as we walked. "Oh I just overheard a certain person telling another person that they couldn't see them anymore because they realised they liked someone else. A lot."
Oh hell's bells!! Dave heard me telling Slush Boy it's over!! Ahhhhh!!
"So are you going to tell me who this person is?"
"Nungg what?"
Dave laughed, "Who's the person that you like a lot?"
Oh no. What do I say? Should I say its him? Won't he be scared off?! He hasn't even kissed me yet! He musn't like me. Oh no oh no oh no oh no!
5 seconds of silence later
"Is that a no?" He asked.
Stay silent. Don't talk. Do. Not. Say. A. Word.
"Well that's a shame," Dave said, "Cos I've just told Grace the same thing."
I stared at him. He's still looking forward.
"You... you said to Grace that, err, that you like someone else? Err, a lot?"
Dave nodded, "I did." Then he sighed dramatically. What's with the sighing?
1 second later
Oh right. That was the signal for me to admit that it was him I was talking about to Eric.
We've stopped walking now cos we've reached my house.
He turned to face me head on. Ok here goes... "Ok maybe I can tell you."
He smiled widely. Oh mon dieu jelloidness-a-go-go!
"Great," he said, "go on."
He is a meany boy. But a groovy looking one too.
"It's... err," cough "you," cough.
"I'm sorry I didn't catch that can you repeat it please Gee."
I biffed him. "No you heard fine Mr Laughy man!"
Dave laughed and reached forward to give me a playful punch back.
I biffed his head.
He ticked my stomach.
Haha tickly bears with Dave! Haha! So much better than with Cousin James.
Ew get out my head incest boy!!
5 seconds later
Dave grabbed me as I spluttered with laugher and pulled me close to him.
Oh my giddy god's pyjama's I've just realised how close we actually are! His nose his like touching mine! Almost.
We've stopped laughing now. It's gone a wee bit un-laughish. But in a good way.
"I like you too Georgia."
Oh my god.
He leaned in really slowly and then... and then...
0.5 seconds later
...kissed on the cheek!
Bloody hell.
What is bloody wrong with my lips?!
4.45pm
In the bathroom looking at my lips. I can't see anything wrong with them. Fair enough they're a bit on the generous side like my nose but that's a good feature in lips. I think.
So Dave has held my hand, done linksies, had his arm round me, kissed my hand and kissed my cheek. By those accounts we should technically be married. And yet he won't snog me!!
1 minute later
I wonder if he's snogged Grace? Maybe it didn't go too well so he's nervous.
No that can't be right Dave is an excellent snogger with or without a car crash.
He doesn't really seem nervous... just, just... oh I don't know. It just seemed like he did actually want to snog me but then some little man went off in his brain or something so he stopped at last minute. Unless he's just waiting...
But for what? I'm right here!! He knows where I live! Come! Snog me!
20 minutes later
Phone rang so I legged it downstairs to answer it.
It was Dave the Laugh! Yes!
He's asked me out for Friday. Apparently it slipped his mind before. He said he was preoccupied. Which I took to mean as him thinking too much about snogging me to concentrate.
I can't wait for Friday! Our 2nd official date! Brillopads!
Only three days to go!
Wednesday November 23rd
Two days to go!!
What larks at rehearsals today. Me and Dave discussed his "camel" issues.
Yes, he's remembered that he loves camels as well as PANTS. He wasn't half as scared as he was when he got to grips with his PANTS fettish again.
In fact he looked vair pleased with himself. The love for camel shines through. Ahh bless.
Thursday November 24th
One day to go!!!
I would write something extremely funny and witty about today's events but one, nothing interesting actually happened and two, I would rather get to tomorrow to mine and Dave's date.
Friday November 25th
No days to go!!!!
6.00pm
Dave told me at rehearsals to meet me in town at the clocktower at 7. So I will. And I will be ready.
And when I mean ready I don't mean my usual readiness I mean the new readiness for Dave.
I was a complete and utter twit last time dressing up all fancy so this time I'm wearing my scruffy jeans and a t-shirt with spongebob on. Me and Dave will look perfect together in our casual entourage!
I even did my makeup in a casual natural way. Just two layers of mascara, a bit of eyeliner, concealer, one layer of foundation and a hint of blusher for that natural healthy look.
My hair is luuuuurvly and bouncy for once and looks vair gut if I say so myself and I do.
I am all spruced up and ready to go!
6.50pm
At the clock-tower
I'm early. Why am I always early for my date's with Dave?
No wait that's a stupid question.
5 minutes later
Oh PANTS in heaven I see Dave! He's got something in his hand.
30 seconds later
Oh FOR BLOODY PANTS SAKE!
It's happened again!!
What is Big G trying to do to me?! I must be his only amusement in this world with my screwed up life.
2 seconds later
Let me fill you in.
Dave arrived – good. Only he was dressed in a SUIT! Yes, a SUIT!!
I wear what Jas does her vole watching in and he goes and dresses up like BRAD BLOODY PIT at a movie premiere!!
I think I need to blub.
1 second later
Dave is looking at me funny. I'm not surprised. If could see what I was wearing right now I would be looking at me funny too.
If he keeps staring at me like that I will definitely start blubbing.
2 seconds later
Dave's face just broke into a huge grin. Ok staring is one think but laughing at me is as cruel as Big G!
Dave held out his arm. Oh my giddy god! He's got a rose at the end of it! For me! I hope.
"Here you go beautiful," he said. Awwww.
"Please don't look at me." I said, "I'm an idiot with knobs on."
Dave smiled and gave me a kiss on the cheek before taking my hand. "Nope," he said, "I think I'll stick with beautiful."
10 minutes later
At a restaurant
A posh restaurant.
A really posh restaurant.
I could not be more out of place if I was on stage in the West End during the Sound of PANTS.
Dave doesn't mind. He doesn't seem to notice the amount of people staring at me and what I'm wearing.
In fact all he's doing is staring at me. Now that I don't mind.
12 minutes later
Starters are here. How groovy is it to say that? Starters! Start-ers! I'm lucky if I get a piece of mouldy bread at home and now I'm eating starters! Wow.
Yummy yum yum.
2 minutes later
"You enjoy that?" Dave laughed.
Fair beans. I did just gallop my chicken wings down all at once. They were lurrrvly though.
I nodded, "Indeedio I did."
15 minutes later
Main Course
I ordered a pizza, seeing as this is an Italian Restaurant. I like to think I'm rubbing my Laughy success in the Italian handbag's face. Even though he isn't here. But they're all his cousins working here probably so it's the same thing.
Now would actually be a good time to here one of Dave's jokes about the Ex-Stallion. But of course he can't. Because he doesn't know him. Or at least he thinks he doesn't.
Dave has a pizza too. And he has everything on it. And I mean EVERYTHING. Mine's just a margarita. Dave's got ham and tuna and pineapple and pepperoni and baked beans. Yes, they do beans on pizzas now. Ew.
1 minute later
Just tried a section of Dave's pizza with beans on and I have two words to say: Yum-eyyy!
That is brillopads to the extreme!!
20 minutes later
All done with the main course. I ended up trading half my pizza for some more of Dave's beans. Oo-er! I am as stuffed as a stuffed person can be. But it was vair vair groovy. Groovy gravy in fact.
Dave said, "What you fancying for desert?"
Hmmm are you on the menu Mr Laughy Man?
"Actually I think I'm a bit full now." I said which is true.
Dave nodded in agreement, "Yeah me too, maybe we can grab an ice cream on the way back or something."
I said, "It's November. It's freezing."
"Well then we won't notice the coldness of the ice cream will we?"
Good point. Well made.
8 minutes later
Walking somewhere eating an icecream.
When we left Dave did this vair marvy thing... he shook the hand of the waiter and tipped him! You know when you put the money in your hand and slide it into the other person's.
I wouldn't have known only when he did it Dave dropped the money. Now that was tip top hilariosity and what made it so marvy!
Me and Dave just burst out laughing like loons then legged it from the restaurant.
Now we're licking our ice creams. I got strawberry and Dave got chocolate. Yummy yum.
2 minutes later
Dave took my hand again and we bounded down the road. I bet we looked vair cheesy with our ice creams and happy smiles. Joys unbounded. And for once I mean it literally!
1 minute later
I have no idea where we are. And I don't care. Because I'm with Dave. Davey Davey Dave.
2 minutes later
We stopped... somewhere. I'm too busy concentrating on being with Dave than anything else really.
I finished my ice cream finally but my teeth are now chattering. Dave moved round to face me and noticed. "You ok?" He said.
I nodded and tried to say, "Yess-usss," but it came out all stuttery.
Dave smiled all crooked-like and it made me go jelloid-esk.
"Still, maybe I can help." He said and then he... yes he...
0.5 seconds later
HE ACTUALLY KISSED ME!!!!!!!!
Praise all the heavens and Gods and Sandras and Call-me-Arnolds and Vikings and even the VOLES!
Oh my giddy god Dave just kissed me! Blissness to the extreme!
It was only a number 3 but it was sooooo nice! And I wasn't expecting it so it was so much better!! He just leant in slowly and pressed his lips lightly to mine. Jelloid knickers jelloid knickers!
2 seconds later
And now I'm stood gaping like a frozen fish while Dave is chuckling at me. I shut my mouth quickly but then Dave leaned in again and kissed me again! This time for longer too!
When he stopped Dave said really quietly and sexy like, "You taste like strawberries."
I laughed but bit my lip. Don't want a laughing spaz to ruin the moment.
"You taste like chocolate." I said back to him and he wrapped his arms tightly around me. My lord I'm not cold anymore. Not one teeny weeny bit cold.
Dave grinned and bent down again and said, "So I was thinking, you don't want to see anyone else. And I don't really want to either. So..."
"Yes!" I said quickly and Dave chucked.
"Gee let me ask!" He cleared his throat like he was making a speech or something. Vair amusant. Then he said, "Will you be my partner in Laughs?"
How about in snogs too?
I nodded and grinned my spastic full-nostril flaring smile. I hope it doesn't put him off.
"Why of course Mr Laugh."
Dave grinned and kissed me again on the lips for ages. Number 4! Woopy woop!
15 minutes later
Dave walked me home and had his arm round me the whole time. It was just as well, I probably would have collapsed otherwise. My legs are in a state of permanent jelloid I feel soooo happy. Just spending time with Dave is making me grin like a loony.
"I'll call you yeah?" Dave said at my wall.
I nodded like a nodding thing, "Yupp that sounds perfectamondoey."
"Good. Cos I would have called you anyway." Dave said then kissed me lightly again on the lips. Brain-freeze brain-freeze! Am I gonna stop working like this every time he kisses me?
Not that I care. In fact its vair fantabbytastic!!
"Night Gee. Camel's away."
I laughed, "Yeah, goodnight Dave."
Saturday November 25th
10a.m
Up at the crack of dawn cos I was woken up by Libby singing a new rendition of "Sex Bum" and dancing with Gordy. But I don't even care because I am now the girlfriend of Dave the Laugh!! Yes yes and thrice yes!
Everything is fabby!
Well apart from Rosie and Jas not talking to me. In fact I really want to ring them right now and tell them everything. That's what I'd normally do. You know, if they didn't hate my guts for "lying" to Dave.
Tis a sham an' all. Why can't they get over it already me and Dave are happy. And I really miss them.
Not that I'd tell them that.
2 minutes later
Breakfast of clean fresh air! Tip-top parenting from Mutti as usual! Quelle surprise.
30 seconds later
I suppose I could ring Ellen to spread the brillopads news of me and Dave. But I really would like to get off the phone in the next week. Despite what Vati says.
Dave hasn't rang me yet. But then again he is normal (for a Laughy man) so is probably doing the right thing and sleeping right now.
But then again he doesn't have a little annoying sister/devil like me.
Unless... does he? I don't actually know. I don't know if he even has any siblings.
Oh no flashback to the hospital when I went all blubberly because I didn't know anything 'real' about Dave. I guess I still don't. But... but I know that I like him lots.
And I know that we have fun when we're together.
And I know I'm now his girlfriend.
And I know I no longer have the cosmic horn or any horn at all except for Dave.
In other words... I have finally lost my red bottom!!
I am so proud.
Ok so that was sort of what you guys have been waiting for... don't worry though there will be more of that!! :P
Hope to hear all your thoughts XD
And also I need your help... it says on my document manager fandango that I can't upload any more files because there is too many in "story" format..
anyone know how to change formats? I can't find it :( or do you know if the chapter will be deleted from here if i delete it from my documents?!
Horn's out! ;)