I only had a few minor burns from the candles. The doctor told me that I would have died if "he" didn't save me. As for who "he" was, the doctor could not say.
The retarded side of me wanted to believe it was Itachi. I knew better. I don't think Itachi would feel guilty. Somehow, I could tell that Itachi wasn't kidding Friday night. This made me have other theories about him. Maybe he really is straight, but liked our conversations on messenger so much that he thought he was gay or bi. Then he figured out that he was fucked up according to society and broke up with me. I know, it's messed up...but it's Itachi we're talking about.
I wonder who "he" was if he wasn't Itachi. I bet you someone heard me screaming.
Yeah, I wanted to scream right now, but my lungs felt dry and raspy from the smoke that came off all the lit candles. The smell of roses, rain, and that awful angel candle still were present in my nose. I had a feeling that they would linger around, just like my loneliness.
Depressing thoughts kept coming and staying in my head, almost like files to an outdoor light. I didn't want it to be, but it had to be reality. Itachi was going off on his own. He wanted his own life - just without me in it.
"When can I go-?" I asked. I almost said home, but where was home? Certainly not back with my parents, and definitely not with Itachi back at the dorm. I felt lost, like a guy stuck in a room with the lights off.
My world has turned upside-down.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I forgot my cell phone was on the side table beside me until it vibrated, moving on its own until it almost fell off. I caught it just in time and answered.
Sakura. Huh, it's been a while since I've talked to her.
"Hey..."
Sakura sighed. "What have you done now? You don't sound too good."
"Well...a lot of things have happened." Better to be blunt now.
"Like what? Did Itachi do anything to you?"
Was that suppose to be a trick question? I don't know if Itachi did anything to me exactly or if it was me to did something to myself by over thinking these series of events. "Ummm, sort of."
"Tell me everything." Geez, what a commanding bitch. Then I remember, oh yeah, she was my bitch.
Yes, I'm becoming pimp, because apparently Itachi doesn't like gay freaks that care about their sense of style.
"Well, for starters," I started telling her, "he broke up with me."
"He did WHAT?"
This was going to take a long time to explain everything, but at least I knew the conversation Itachi and I had word for word.
I would never forget it.
How could I? It was the turning point of my life.
The more and more I thought about it....is this really worth it? Is Itachi worth it? ...Is my physical and mental condition worth it? Is it really worth it just to give up everything for the love of my brother?
I would normally say yes, but I was growing tired of Itachi. Someone new would be nice...someone like...
"Sakura, do you want to go out sometime?" I asked.
I knew this was also the turning point for Sakura as well.
"Wh-what do you mean? Are you saying you're-? I don't...I don't...well, yes, I'll go out, but..." Wow. I've never heard Sakura say such incomplete sentences.
As I closed my phone, I reminded myself, "Remember, this is just so I can get a break from Itachi."
No, I wasn't using Sakura. She was the girl I liked before I started looking at guys in a different point of view. So I was accomplishing I dream I had when I was seven. That works.