CHAPTER 7

Matthias hadn't seen Lukas all day, and he wondered why. It was almost as if the other was avoiding him, and the thought alone chipped away at the content mood he'd been holding for the past few days.

Finally, when Lukas declined the request to see him in his study, he had to go see what he was up to.

"Lukas, let me in," he demanded. He banged his fist on the door after there was no reply. "That was not an order you can accept at your leisure. Open the door before I open it myself!"

Without much choice, Lukas opened the door. He looked like he'd been sleeping, although Matthias couldn't be sure.

"What have you been doing in this room all day?"

Lukas simply held out the bunny. Its nose was twitching a bit and it looked relaxed and healthy. Matthias took it from his hand, holding it for a moment. He was actually surprised that the animal had survived this long.

"I see. Put it back in the cage and come with me. You have your first real lesson."

The word "lesson" made Lukas instinctively groan. Lessons seemed hard. Nonetheless, Lukas followed Matthias to his study. Matthias had pulled a chair up next to his own and already had the journal and pens out.

"Sit. We will begin with learning the alphabet. You will copy what I have written here into your journal."

Matthias watched Lukas slowly write out each letter, muttering under his breath the written name for each. His eyes were close to the page and he was hunched over, something Matthias would never do.

"Sit up straight."

"What? I don't think that matters."

"Sit up straight," he said again, putting one hand on Lukas' chest and the other on his lower back. "Shoulders back, head up, back straight."

When Matthias touched him, Lukas flinched. All he could think of was the dream he'd had and he nearly cringed for thinking of that again.

It was the reason he hadn't wanted to see the other man today. The reason he was going out of his way to avoid him. The dream had been so vivid and when he looked at Matthias, he could practically feel his lips on his neck again. He visibly shuddered.

"Are you cold?"

For some reason, Lukas nodded. He supposed it would be a good lie for why he shuddered.

To his surprise, Matthias took off his coat and draped it over Lukas' shoulders. He immediately tensed upon feeling the weight of the coat on his shoulders. On one hand, it was very warm. On the other, it was a very personal item and it was Matthias' warmth he was feeling.

He pulled the coat up more, wrapping it around himself. Who was he to decline a kind gesture?

"You're hunched over again. Sit up."

Lukas sat up straight and continued with his writings. After a few minutes of silence, he put his pen down. The taller man looked over, eyes scanning each symbol.

"Do you know each one by name?"

"Not in order."

Matthias began to protest, but stopped when he realized that it wasn't actually necessary for the alphabet to be in order. "Recite them."

Lukas was stumped again. "G, I, L, Q, W, Z, P, B. And then there is—"

That seemed to be it. He looked down at the page, saw all the letters he missed, and turned away, muttering under his breath.

"I am sure you can memorize the order," Matthias reassured.

Lukas slowly shook his head. It was hard for him to feel motivated about this. He closed the book and let out a quiet sigh.

"What if I showed you a different way to memorize?"

Lukas looked over again, re-opened the book, and nodded.

"Matthias, you must complete your writings by the time we meet again tomorrow. Less of the knights in place of writings."

Matthias nodded solemnly. Once the man was out of the room, he grinned, tossed his book on the floor, and ran down the stairs as fast as he could. He pushed open one of the doors, yelling "I am finished! What do you feel like doing?"

The boy looked up from his desk, huffed, and said, "I have to memorize the written symbols that he left for me. You get all the easy work."

"Easy? I have not heard anything so ridiculous in months!"

Matthias sat down next to him, looking over his work with a laugh. The boy punched him in the leg and said, "Do not laugh!"

He just grinned wider. "If I teach you a good way to memorize, you must teach me a new game. How does that sound?"

The boy nodded eagerly, turning to Matthias which a huge grin.

"I memorized them through song. Here, listen."

Matthias then sang a short song he'd made up for memorizing the alphabet. The boy beamed at him and sang along the second time. Then the third time. And by the fourth, he was singing it by himself.

"You have it memorized! Keep practicing and you will become an expert."

The two laughed together for a moment before they heard a knock on the door. Matthias opened it and looked down, smiling wider. "Look who it is!"

"No maidens allowed!"

"But she doesn't count," Matthias said, winking at her and lifting her up onto his shoulders. She grabbed onto his hair and giggled while the boy stuck out his tongue at her.

"There will be no wars during the game! And we must stay outside. Father has guests coming soon and he is preparing the castle."

"Doesn't that seem silly?"

"No. It is effective."

Lukas hesitated before singing softly under his breath. It seemed so strange to sing to memorize, but it was easy and he was willing to do anything to make this process easier.

After a moment, he realized Matthias was staring at him and he scooted away a bit, feeling uneasy under his gaze. The taller man noticed and averted his eyes, but only for a moment.

It wasn't his intention to make the other uncomfortable, but there were times when it hit him that he had been alone in the castle for so long with just his servants. Seeing anyone from the village was interesting. It was the only new thing he would ever see nowadays.

Besides that, Lukas was different. He was unlike any person who'd ever visited him. He had never had someone so young before. And he'd never had someone who would have to stay so long, either.

He thought he'd be able to keep his distance, but here was Lukas in his study, right beside him. He was close enough that he could smell him, even. He smelled a little like milk. Sort of sweet and sort of pure. He didn't know how else to describe it besides that.

"Stop looking at me," he muttered.

This pulled Matthias out of his thoughts and he, once again, looked away.

Lukas repeated the song a few more times before standing, deciding that he was ready to leave for now. Matthias found himself in a dilemma.

He didn't want Lukas to go, but he also didn't want to force him to stay without a reason. He didn't want to seem vulnerable, like he needed anyone. But that was the truth. He wanted Lukas' company.

"Lukas."

He stopped, turning to face Matthias again.

"What is it?"

He should have thought of something, but his mind was blank. "Nothing," he answered.

Lukas nodded faintly, turned again, and left.

"Are you concerned with the young master's behavior, Charles?"

"I suppose I am, Anna."

The maid nodded as she folded a sheet she'd cleaned earlier. Charles was patching something up quickly and humming under his breath.

"He seems to like that boy."

Charles glanced over at her. "I suppose he does. Though it is none of our business."

"But what if he decides he cannot complete th—"

"It is none of our business," he interrupted again. He stood and walked to the room over, not wanting to be pestered anymore about his master.

Matthias rubbed his temples and reached for the steaming cup of tea in front of him. He hadn't been so stressed in a while, and it was all his fault. He should have been more careful. He should have been calculating the result of his actions.

He was being far too merciful and kind towards Lukas. He should have stayed just as cold as he had been on the day he came into the castle with his brother.

"Is something the matter, sir?"

"Charles," he said, the distress evident in his voice, "I am going to have to be stern. More cold. There is no other choice."

"I assume you consider that behavior more merciful than kindness?"

Matthias stirred his tea silently for a moment. "I consider betrayal to be painful."

"But would you say that ignorance is bliss, sir?"

He only scoffed and stood up, walking away from his bed. He didn't know what he thought anymore.

"Perhaps I should ignore him completely. It is just—"

He stopped himself. Charles nodded knowingly and set down a vase he'd been polishing. "It is just that you have been alone for too long. You desire what he could give you more than—"

"How could you say such a thing? To even insinuate it is just . . . just mad!"

He was angry now. He rubbed his eyes and looked away, gritting his teeth as his memories hit him like a brick, causing his heart to convulse for a short moment.

He clutched his shirt over his heart, shaking his thoughts off as he faced his butler again.

"I know what I want. I've wanted it for so long and have been working towards it my entire life and then some. I will not change for this boy. A peasant, no less!"

"Sir, I believe it to be a matter of instant gratification."

"Instant gratification?"

Charles poured more tea as he nodded. "Simply put; he is here. And they are not."

That resonated within Matthias and he took a moment to think about what his butler was saying. Finally, he said, "Then I should give in to my selfishness? Be kind until the end? Treat him with betrayal?"

"It is ultimately your choice. I do not see why you would care so much about being selfish, young master. This has never been a problem in the past."

He knew his butler was right, but there was something different about Lukas. He had felt it the moment he touched his cheek the first time he met him.

"What say you, then? What should I do?"

The butler picked up his tray and walked towards the door. "Treat him coldly, as always. But if you find yourself slipping, it will be your choice to give in or stay bitter."

"But what if I—" He trailed off, but Charles knew what he meant.

"Then you do. And either choice you make in the end will lead to suffering, one long-term and the other short."