Disclaimer: Gravity Falls belongs to Alex Hirsch and Disney.

Chapter 4: The Plan Hits a Snag

Wendy was mildly disappointed when her shift ended long before the twins arrived, but she needed to get home to butter up her dad into letting her go from part-time to full-time employee at the Shack. She knew that would be a huge change in the timeline, considering that she had only been a part-timer for the Mystery Shack last time, but her plan called for her to be close to Dipper for her plan to work. Granted, she could have probably done everything without being full-time as the pair had gotten rather close before. But with over 100 people's lives at stake, she did not want to take any chances.

So it was with some urgency that she biked to the grocery store and picked up the ingredients for her father's favorite casserole along with a 32oz steak as the main course. Select, and the older the cow was at time of slaughter the better; if it didn't have gristle to chew on, it wasn't manly enough for Manly Dan. Her brothers and herself would share another 32oz cut into different sizes; 16oz for the eldest boy, Paul; 8oz for the middle boy, Joseph; and 4oz for the baby of the family, Jason. Wendy would end up with the last 4oz.

Several hours later, Wendy was getting ready to put the steaks on the family's cast iron griddle so that they would be ready just as her family got home from their day at the lumberyard when there was a knock at the door. Wendy stared in surprise at the door, the only people that had ever knocked at the Corduroy's door had been the Pines, and Soos. Nobody else came up this far out of town. Well, Robbie had when they were dating, but he just sat outside honking the horn or throwing pebbles at her window until Wendy came out. Something about liking the arrangement of his limbs.

"It's open." Wendy called out. If she had been surprised before, she was absolutely flabbergasted when saw her father timidly peek through the doorway before coming into their home, followed by her brothers. Manly Dan tiptoed around nobody, except maybe her mother when she had been alive.

"Everything alright dad?" Her father looked at her startled.

"No, no, everything's fine. I just didn't expect you to be in so early. We might have picked something up before coming home." He replied, rambling.

"Where else would I be?" Her father gave her a flustered look before shrugging.

"Maybe out with your friends." One of her brothers, Paul most likely, snorted from behind her father's massive frame, only to yelp a moment later.

"Well, regardless, I thought you guys could deserve a special meal. I made your favorite casserole with a 32oz steak cooked rare." There was silence for several moments before the boys started fighting over who got the largest portion after their father.

Wendy waited until her father had finished off his casserole, and was busy chewing on his steak before she decided to ask him for anything.

Carefully cutting into her own steak, she nonchalantly spoke, "So, dad, I was thinking about going full-time at the Mystery Shack, focus on that and maybe babysitting the Pines Twins that came up today."

There was silence around the table as everyone stopped eating. Wendy looked up at her family to see her brothers staring to her side, where her father sitting. She looked at her father, concerned, only to see him staring at her with misty eyes.

"You mean that?" he whispered. Wendy was starting to feel a bit freaked out from her father's behavior.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I?" What happened next was probably the greatest surprise of the day. Manly Dan sniffed, and broke out bawling as he swept her up in a bone-crushing hug. She could vaguely make out him bellowing that he would be okay with her plan to go full-time, but the pain of her ribs was kind of blurring everything around her.

"Air, I need air." She croaked as she started pushing against the engulfing hug. Her father dropped her back in her seat before rubbing her head harshly as he resumed eating with a lighter air about him.

'What's up with that?' Wendy thought to herself as she resumed eating.

The next morning, Wendy woke up earlier than she ever had before. Determined to get an early start on her plans to thwart Bill, she was confident that the first step in doing so would be convincing Stan to give her a full time job at the Mystery Shack. Her reception upon arrival deflated her confidence like a popped balloon.

"What are you doing here so early?" Stan grouched at her, "I thought people like you didn't get up until noon."

"People like who, Grunkle Stan?" Stan turned around to see Mabel, Dipper, and Will standing behind him.

"Er, uh, Teens! You know, teens are always sleeping in and lounging about like good for nothin's" Stan replied. Will brightened as he saw Wendy standing on the front porch.

"Oh, hey Re-Wendy. What a pleasant surprise, did you come to join us for the company breakfast?" Will inquired. Stan shot a look at him.

"Company breakfast, when did the offer for daily breakfast become a company breakfast." Stan grumbled. Will pointed back to the kitchen.

"Since Soos showed up, I thought why not?" upon seeing Stan's glare, he waved his hands in a pacifying gesture, "All on my dime of course."

Stan gave a grunt before he headed back to kitchen. Will followed him, presumably to fix breakfast. Wendy turned to the twins, who were staring up at her. Dipper was watching her with a wary gaze, while Mabel was looking at her with a face that she had seen on sweater-wearing girl before, but never directed towards her. Wendy gave them a small wave.

"Hey there, I'm your co-worker, Wendy. What are your guys' names?" Dipper gave her a confused and frightened look.

"D-D-Dipper." The boy stammered. Wendy frowned inwardly, as Dipper had never been this nervous around her before, especially not before he had developed his crush on her; was this one of the ripple effects that Cipher had talked about? Wendy turned her attention to Mabel, who looked like she was about to explode with excitement. Before Wendy could say anything, the younger girl erupted in a deluge of words and motion.

"HiI'mMabel,you'recuteohmygoshisn'tshecuteDipperdoyouwanttogoonadate!" Mabel screeched in one unintelligible breath as she bounced up and down while waving her arms. Wendy tried to process what she said as Dipper turned to his sister, giving her a mild slap to the arm.

"Mabel, you know what Mom and Dad said, No girls while staying with your Grunkle." Dipper stated, before turning to Wendy. "I'm really sorry about that, Mabel sometimes gets over-excited."

Wendy looked towards Mabel uncertainly, "Mr. Pines never mentioned that you're a lesbian."

Mabel guffawed, "Lesbian, pshaw, I'm bisexual, everyone deserves some of the Mabel love."

Dipper glared at the doorway behind Wendy. "It's not that, Mabel's not attracted to females, she's attracted to the lack of rules regarding when it's okay to have sex with them. That and an unhealthy fascination with boobs."

"Who wouldn't be fascinated with boobs, Dipper? They're like stress balls that you always have on you." His twin retorted, before sighing dreamily, "I can't wait to get my own."

The riveting conversation was halted when Will called out from the kitchen that breakfast was ready to be served. Dipper darted off while Mabel followed him chanting, "Breakfast! Breakfast! Breakfast!"

Wendy stared after them with a cold ball in the pit of her stomach. The twins were extremely different from what she remembered, and she wasn't certain that her plan would work anymore.

The only space open for Wendy to sit at was between Mabel, who was clearly leering at Wendy; and Dipper, who was staring at her with suspicion as he put his arm around his bowl, protecting it from attempts to steal his food. Wendy suppressed a shudder as she sat down between the twins, only to lurch to the side with a yelp, mashing herself against Dipper when she felt a hand seize her thigh.

"Mabel, quit that, she's your co-worker and I won't stand for any fraternization between my employees." Mr. Pines ordered, pointing his fork at her in an accusatory manner. Mabel grumbled and brought her hand back up on the table. Wendy detached herself from a frozen Dipper with a murmured apology as she went to eat from her bowl, courtesy of Will. The food in the bowl was some sort of mixture of eggs, meat, cheese and potatoes; giving it a rather unappetizing appearance. Across from her, Soos gave an appreciative noise as he ate his food.

"Say Mr. Coder, this is delicious, what is it?" the handyman inquired.

"This is one of the items on the Mystery Eats menu starting today. I call it Sascrotch Droppings." Will chuckled. Everyone at the table paused in their eating. Soos raised his hand.

"Question, are they real droppings?"

"Of course not, Soos, the Sascrotch isn't real." Stan retorted, "By the way, you got anymore brilliant marketing ideas, because I'm certain that I can give you some tips."

"No need, I got plenty of ideas from the Mystery Shack, like Pancake That Looks like a Face, the pancake that looks like a face; and the Bottomless Pita." Will stated, waving his hand out towards the horizon. "We're going to be rolling in the dough, literally."

Wendy turned to Dipper, who had quietly been eating his Sascrotch Droppings, "Awfully quiet there Dipper. Everything all right?"

Dipper froze, staring at her like a deer in the headlights as she waited for a reply. Before he got a chance to answer, Wendy shrieked when Mabel reached over and mauled her breast.

"Boop!"

"Mabel!" half the table bellowed at her.

Author's note: Before any of readers get offended about anything you read in this chapter and future chapters, just remember, everything has a purpose.