Author's note: This particular Spy AU idea has been floating around in my head since I rewatched The Man From UNCLE. It's basically just a bunch of loosely connected scenes that let me play around with one of my favorite tropes. They aren't edited, but they're kinda fun and I do hope you enjoy reading them as much as I've enjoyed writing them,
Fake Engaged AU, Part 1
"How would you feel about visiting your brother?"
Tessa looked up the toast and tea she was making for breakfast to see Will and Jem in the kitchen doorway. Well, Will was leaning against the doorframe, his beautifully muscled body framed by the doorway, while Jem peered at her over his partner's shoulder. She was struck momentarily dumb, as she always was when the two of them were in the same place at the same time, as if her brain could quite process so much male beauty all at once.
Not mention the fact that the last time she'd seen Special Agent James Carstairs, he'd been backing out of her tiny bedroom wearing nothing but her sheets around his waist.
Jem misinterpreted her silence and pushed past Will with concern plainly written on his face. "Tessa, you don't have to."
She hadn't seen Nate in years. He'd left her in New York, promising that he'd send for her as soon as he had enough money, promising that she could go to school in London and that they would take care of each other. She'd done the research, found a good school with an excellent writing program and a hefty amount of scholarships. She'd applied for a student visa and gotten it, only to have Nate tell her again and again that he just needed a few more months.
And then one day she'd called him and learned from an automated recording that the number she had dialed was no longer in service. And then he'd stopped replying to her emails. Now, she only knew that he was alive because of the random shit he shared on his Twitter account. She'd never stopped caring about her brother, but she'd moved past the idea of ever seeing him again. Until now.
The British government must be tired of protecting her and shuffling her about from safehouse to safehouse across the continent. Surely they had better things to spend their money on. But it would also be safer for her to stay with Nate than to go back to the U.S. and potentially face misguided drug lords alone, so of course the boys would want her to go there. It made the most sense really.
"It's alright, Jem." She shot him a smile. "I understand. I'll pack up after breakfast and be ready to leave whenever you want."
Behind Jem, Will was frowning. "I don't think you do quite understand."
"MI-6 doesn't have the time or the money to protect one girl. It's easier for everyone if I stay with Nate. I understand."
"Oh, Tessa, no," Jem said at the same time as Will started laughing and gasped, "I wish it were as simple as that."
"What are you talking about?" she asked, looking from one to the other, her tea and toast completely forgotten on the counter. "What's going on?"
Will met her eyes evenly, still leaning against the doorframe. "There is some intelligence that has led Commander Branwell to believe that your brother maybe involved in a weapons trafficking operation directly related to Carolina Carter." Tessa's jaw dropped, but Will kept talking. "We have intelligence that says he's receiving a shipment of weapons in a week. Our mission is to infiltrate his group and intercept those weapons while learning as much as we can about the connection to Carter. And Commander Branwell thinks that we need you in order to do so."
"You don't have to do it, Tessa." Jem took another step towards her as if to take her hands, but stopped himself at the last minute. "Even if it weren't absurdly dangerous, I know how you feel about your brother. We can find another way to get the information. You don't have to do anything you're not comfortable doing."
"What exactly do you need me to do?" she asked.
Jem's face immediately went pink. "The Commander thinks that you should go visit your brother on the pretense that you'd like Nathaniel to meet your fiance."
"My...oh." She felt her cheeks start to warm. "And which one of you drew the short straw?"
"The Commander felt that with your...pre-established relationship, it might be easier on you if James was the fake fiance," Will answered. And then with a waggle of his eyebrows, "Although I did offer."
Tessa didn't bother to resist the urge to roll her eyes at the suggestive tone in Will's voice. It was easier to roll her eyes at Will than it was to think about the implications of pretending to be Jem's fiancee.
"Of course I'll do it," she managed to say with a remarkably steady voice, in spite of the alarm bells going off inside her head. She had learned the hard way that, where Nate was involved, it was best to stay away. But if her brother was involved with an international arms dealer, she needed to get to him, to try to convince him to leave while he was still alive. "Whatever you need. It's the least I can do."
A week later, Tessa and Jem were sitting in a rental car in front of her brother's apartment building and she was trying very hard not to let her nerves show. Not that she should have bothered. She and Jem had spent the last week getting to know each other, or. at least, the versions of themselves they were presenting to Nate, very intimately. It had been work to hide things from him before, but after the grueling week of couple's training it was impossible to hide anything from him.
Now, Jem leaned across the center console and took her hand. They'd been practicing touching each other for a week too. They went for walks around the safehouse holding hands. She had laid her head on his shoulder while watching a movie. He kissed her knuckles and the top of her head at random throughout the day. Even so, she still jumped when he touched her like a jolt of electricity was shooting through her.
This was not fake-couple touching. This was Jem, the special agent, her protector and her friend, reaching out to her to make sure she was alright. She wrapped her fingers around his and hung on tight.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked, giving her fingers a squeeze, the fake engagement ring he'd given her that morning glinting in the weak sunlight. "We can go back now. Tell him that something came up and we'll find you someplace safe to ride this thing out. Just say the word and it's done."
"I'm okay," she sighed as she squeezed his hand back. "It's just...These aren't quite the circumstances I'd imagined when I thought about seeing my brother again. That's all."
He smiled sympathetically. "I would make it different for you if I could."
"I know." She pulled her hand away and smoothed her hair down instead. "Today's the easy day, right?"
"The worst part will be seeing him again for the first time, but then we're going to claim jetlag and go to our hotel," Jem confirmed. "Only a couple hours tops."
"Okay." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before pasting a smile onto her face. "Let's get this over with."
In spite of her best efforts, when Tessa saw her brother again for the first time in years, she had to choke back tears.
Nate met her and Jem in the lobby and swept her up into a bear hug. When he was done spinning her around, she was breathless and laughing in spite of herself. Her brother was certainly a lot of things, but when he was happy, his mood was infectious.
She was somewhere between laughing and crying when she introduced her brother to Jem. "Nate, this is James, my fiance."
"Fiance?" Nate exclaimed with a raised eyebrow. "I didn't even know you had a boyfriend."
Tessa had to force herself to keep the smile on her face, knowing that over the years she could have shaved her head and gotten married and given birth to a monkey and her brother wouldn't have known or cared. Nate only cared about the people who were right in front of his face, or else he forgot about them entirely.
"It was a quick courtship," Jem said smoothly, his hand coming to rest on the small of her back. "I knew from day one that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. It's nice to meet you."
He extended his hand and Nate clasped it with an easy enough smile. "Welcome to the family, I guess. Let's get you upstairs, there's some associates of mine I'd like you to meet before the big shindig tomorrow night."
Nate's apartment was far nicer than Tessa had been expecting. In spite of the dossier that Will had shown her before they left, she'd hoped that the government had somehow had made a mistake. Those hopes were shattered when the elevator opened up directly into a penthouse suite. The apartment was huge and ornate to the point of being gaudy and she also knew that there was no way her brother was capable of making the kind of money that would pay for a posh place like the one before her without engaging some sort of criminal activity.
"Tessie, meet my friends. This is Mo, Clyde, and Axel. Boys, meet my baby sister and her man, James."
Mo and Clyde were in front of a giant flat screen TV, video game controllers in hand, and they only grunted in acknowledgement of her brother's words. Axel, on the other hand, had been staring out the window and when Nate spoke, he turned slowly to face them. He was a handsome man, and was dressed so impeccably that Tessa felt shabby in her jeans. His pale grey gaze drifted towards them, locking on Tessa and sliding so slowly up body that it made her feel like she wasn't wearing a stitch of clothing, shabby or not. She automatically took a step back as he crossed the room, his hand reaching out towards her. But before he could touch her, Jem stepped smoothly in front of her, his hand outstretched.
"Nice to meet you, Axel," Jem said, his voice low and dangerous in spite of his pleasant words as he grasped the other man's hand. "Any friend of Nate's is a friend of ours, right, darling?"
Jem turned to her then and Tessa let him pull her to his side, pressing her tightly against him, one arm wrapped loosely around her shoulders. She gave Johnny a little wave of acknowledgment and laid her head against Jem's shoulder. "It's nice to meet you."
"The pleasure is all mine." Axel said, dropping Jem's hand like it was something filthy and locking his eyes on hers and giving her a cool smile. "Do let me know if there's anything at all I can do to make your stay in London more . . . pleasurable."
"Dude," Nate said, punching Axel lightly on the shoulder. "Knock of the smooth talk. She's engaged and you're way too old for her."
The smile didn't budge, but Tessa thought she saw something flicker in his icy gaze.
"You're hosting the gala tomorrow, aren't you?" she asked, looking up at Axel through her lashes. "I'm sure London's foster care system is incredibly grateful for your patronage."
"The unloved orphans of this city have always held a special place in my heart," Axel said, but there was no emotion in his voice. "I am happy to be in a position to help them."
Tessa knew for a fact that this was completely untrue. The gala and silent auction Axel Mortmain was hosting the next evening was just a means to an end. One of the items up for auction (Jem and Will weren't sure which one), housed a thumb drive with the encryption codes for Carolina Carter's latest weapons shipment. Tomorrow night's gala would host some of the world's most notorious terrorists and crime lords. Any money raised on behalf of London's foster care system would go directly into Mortmain's pockets. At least, that's what Will had told her.
"Thank you, by the way, for securing us tickets," Jem said, smiling his most genuine smile. "Tess was so disappointed that Nate wasn't going to be free the one weekend we're in the country."
"My pleasure," Mortmain said. "Anything for Nathaniel. He's one of my most promising employees."
The hotel that the British government had booked for them was beyond anything Tessa had ever dreamed. Unlike Nate's gaudily ornate apartment, the hotel room was lavish without being over the top. From the California king sized bed, to the Jacuzzi tub, to the granite and stainless steel kitchenette, the space was designed for ultimate relaxation and comfort.
Unfortunately, Tessa had no time to appreciate it.
Will had turned out to be the bellboy who brought their bags up to the room after Jem and Tessa checked in and they'd started planning immediately. Apparently, while they had been out to dinner with Nate, Will had discovered the warehouse where a cache of nuclear weapons was supposed to be hidden and now required Jem to help him do recon of the area. As they talked, they scoured the room for bugs, while Tessa went to start unpacking. When she unzipped the first bag and found two guns and several rounds of ammo nestled on top of her clothes, she gasped so loudly that the boys stopped mid conversation.
"Are you alright?" Will asked. "Did you find a bug?"
She withdrew one of the guns from the suitcase, holding it carefully, just like Jem had showed her months ago. "I just don't recall packing an arsenal this morning."
"That's because I repacked your bag for you," Will replied. "I also swapped out a few of your outfits for things that are a little more sexy. You're welcome."
"What?" Tessa cried, face flushing as she thought about Will going through her socks and underwear. "What was wrong with the clothes I packed?"
"Nothing, if you don't want anyone to notice you."
Tessa thought about Johnny's eyes sliding up and down her body and cringed at the thought of wearing something sexy in that man's presence.
"I don't think that will be a problem," Jem said, his voice tight, and Tessa knew he was thinking about Johnny too.
"Well we want her to be a distraction tomorrow night, don't we? She wasn't going to be particularly distracting in that navy blue number you picked out for her."
"It brings out her eyes," Jem grumbled.
"Well the dress I packed will bring out her eyes and emphasize her excellent figure." Will retorted with a wicked grin.
"Did my opinion on my clothing matter to you at all?" Tessa asked, incredulous.
Will shrugged. "Not particularly. I've got a lot more experience with missions like this than you do."
"I have just as much experience as you do and I thought the dress was just fine," Jem said with a frown.
"Ah, but you, my friend, do not possess my exceptional sartorial sense."
"What I am supposed to do with all these guns?" Tessa asked, gesturing at the pile of weaponry that she'd amassed next to her suitcase.
"I'll take care of them,' Jem said, kneeling next to her and scooping the guns into his arms. "I need to gear up for the recon mission anyways."
He proceeded to strap most of the guns onto his body while Will gave him directions to their meeting place.
"See you in fifteen minutes," Will said, but instead of leaving, he stood in the open doorway waggling his eyebrows.
"Was there something else?" Jem asked.
"It is customary to provide your bellboy with a generous tip in a hotel as posh as this one…" Will replied. "How would it look to the other bellboys if I showed up without a tip from the couple staying in the hotel's most expensive room?"
Jem sighed and pulled a note out of his wallet. "I know for certain you are not going to go down and join the other bellboys in comparing your tips."
"Appearances, James, are everything," Will said with a wink in Tessa's direction. And then, more loudly, "Thank you very much, sir. Please call the front desk if you need anything at all."
Jem rolled his eyes and shut the door in Will's face.
"Will you be alright here by yourself?" he asked, turning back to face her. Tessa took a look around the giant hotel room, her eyebrows raised.
"I think I'll be fine."
"There's a delivery van across the street full of agents that are keeping an eye on the hotel's front doors, just in case. But I'll only be gone for a few hours, so you won't be unprotected for very long."
"This is significantly better than the last place," Tessa said, trying to keep her voice light in spite of the fear that was settling into her stomach. She hadn't been truly alone in months. There had always been security or a special agent nearby and while those circumstances were generally uncomfortable and occasionally unpleasant, at least she was never in an physical danger.
It wasn't even so much that she was afraid for herself, although after nearly being assassinated, she now always carried around a certain amount of fear. But the fact that Will and Jem were also risking themselves during this mission made her incredibly nervous, even if she knew that they were trained agents who put their lives on the line every day. But this situation was different and if either of them were hurt because of her or Nate, she would never forgive herself.
"Tess?" Jem was looking at her with concern in his eyes. "Will can do the recon on his own if you want me to stay with you. It's okay, really."
As appealing as asking Jem to stay with her was, the idea of Will being alone in a potentially dangerous was enough to deter her.
"I'll be fine, Jem. Really. I mean, just look at that bathtub." She gestured towards the Jacuzzi and smiled. "This place is like a spa. I won't even notice that you're gone"
"Alright." He looked skeptical and she made her smile brighter to compensate. "I'll only be a few hours. Back before you know it."
Jem had been gone for five and a half hours and Tessa was a little drunk and trying very hard to become frantic with worry.
She'd taken a long, hot bath. She'd started watching a movie on the giant TV screen. She'd helped herself to the contents of the mini fridge and drank one of the tiny bottles inside it to make her feel sleepy. She'd wrapped herself in the fluffy white comforter and willed herself to go to sleep. When that hadn't worked, she'd moved to the couch with two more of the tiny bottles from the mini fridge and started a movie.
Now the movie credits were playing and she sat in a nest of blankets and empty shooters, staring at the door. She regretted the second trip to the mini fridge because the drinking had just made it hard for her to leave the hotel room and go searching for them. If she'd been sober, she would have done it, despite the fact that Jem had told her before he left not to leave the hotel room for any reason.
Even if she weren't drunk, it would be stupid to go searching for them. They were trained professionals and there was a good reason they'd left her in the hotel room. It was safer for everybody this way. Especially since her head spun ever so slightly when she closed her eyes.
She sighed and went back to staring at the door, willing Jem to walk through it.
He didn't.
She woke to the door crashing open and Jem flying through it with a gun drawn. The scream that had tried to claw it's way up her throat died as he raised a finger to his lips and slipped further into the room. She'd left several lights on, and, to her inexperienced eye, the room presented no immediate threats. Even so, she eased herself off the couch and searched for the nearest available weapon, just in case. She'd just raised a small marble statuette, holding it like a baseball bat, when Jem reappeared, his gun nowhere in sight and small smile tugging on the corners of his lips.
"It's alright, Tessa. You're safe." he said, taking the statuette from her and putting it back on the table she'd grabbed it from. "The room's clean."
Tessa blinked, the alcohol and adrenaline combining in her bloodstream and making it hard to focus. "What was that all about?"
"The surveillance team thought they saw someone on the balcony." His voice was tight. "I'm sorry if I frightened you."
"Oh," she breathed. The room suddenly felt terribly hot. Spots blurred the edges of her vision. "I see."
"Tess?" He was closer to her now, his hands on her shoulders. "Are you alright?"
She took a deep breath to try to steady herself, but swayed on her feet anyway. And then there was a dizzying moment where she didn't know which way was up before she realized that Jem had swept her up into his arms and was craddling her close.
"It's okay, Tessa. You're safe. Let's get you to bed. It's okay, I've got you."
"Jem..." she whispered. There had been more to the sentence, but whatever it had been evaporated as she tried to make the room stop spinning.
His grip on her tightened. She could've sworn his lips brushed her forehead before he said, "I'm here, Tess. I've got you."
The room was still tilting dangerously and she buried her face in his neck to block it out.
"Where've you been?" she asked, her lips grazing his skin as she spoke.
"The whole thing took longer than we thought it would." He shifted her in his arms and then leaned down to grab the comforter off of the couch. "I'll tell you about it in the morning."
"Are you okay?" She leaned away from his neck in order to frown up at him. "Is Will…?"
"We're both fine." Jem's voice was reassuring as he laid her down on the giant bed and gently pried her arms from about his neck. He covered her with the comforter and smoothed the hair off of her face, letting his fingers linger against her cheek. "You need to rest, Tessa."
"Stay with me?" she asked, nuzzling her face into his hand. She never would have said anything like that when she was fully awake. They had discussed sleeping arrangements earlier and he'd insisted on sleeping on the couch, on putting himself between her and the door. She would be horrified with herself in the morning, but right now she was tipsy and sleepy and she wanted him close.
"Of course." His voice was so soft she almost didn't hear it. "Whatever you want."
He removed his jacket and kicked his shoes off before laying down next to her, just close enough so that she could reach him if she needed to, but not so close as to be considered intimate. She was nearly asleep when he reached out and wove his fingers together with hers.
"Tessa? Tess, we're supposed to meet your brother for breakfast." A warm hand gently shook her shoulder. "We need to get up."
Tessa realized, ever so slowly and then all at once, that she was laying with her cheek on Jem's chest and that one of his arms draped loosely around her shoulders. Her arm was around his waist and she could feel the edge of his jaw against the top of her head when he spoke.
She sprang away from him with a squeak. "I am so sorry."
"Good morning to you too." He sat up and smiled at her sheepishly. "I'm the one who should apologize. I shouldn't have, but when I woke up, you were sleeping so soundly and…" He bit his lip and shook his head. "It was very unprofessional and I won't let it happen again."
Her face flamed red at the thought of clinging to James Carstairs in her sleep and she jumped out of bed and ran to the walk-in closet in order to hide her embarrassment.
"What happened last night?" she called to him as she dressed. "You were only supposed to be gone for a few hours."
"Some unforeseen complications arose. Will nearly drowned." Jem called cheerfully back to her. When she poked her head out of the closet to say something alarmed, he laughed at her. "Don't worry. He brought it on himself. And he's fine."
Stay tuned for Part 2, which involves a fancy party, a revealing dress, and having to make out for security reasons.