ON YOUR HORSES, BOYS

Part 19

Vin sat on the bottom step of the stairs leading to Nathan's clinic and waited for Josiah to return from Joseph Hobson's store. He noticed the preacher's serious demeanor as he crossed the street and shook his head in disbelief. "No luck, hunh?" he asked, knowing the answer.

"Nah, Hobson's like everyone else in town, worried and scared. It looks like nobody's seen the Nichols since the shootout." Sanchez removed his hat and fanned his face. The morning had long since passed and the temperature was on the rise.

"Last night was quiet enough, you suppose they snuck outta town?"

"Could be. I didn't figure they'd leave the brat behind but maybe they don't know he's being moved today."

"The whole town knows by now, it's hard to imagine they don't. I'm sure they were around after we grabbed Ezra because of those fires." Tanner took the hand Josiah offered and pulled himself to his feet. "I don't know, maybe they did move on to regroup."

"I think I'll have another look around the livery. I want to make sure the two men we set up to guard it are payin' attention. Something tells me the Nichols are gonna want their buggy back regardless."

"Yeah, they'll need it for the old lady. Somehow I can't picture her straddlin' a horse."

Josiah grinned. "You comin'?"

"I'll catch up, there's somethin' I need to be asking Chris."

"Alright, I'll meet you back at the jail -- the wagon from Eagle Bend should be here before too much longer." The preacher hefted his weapon and walked away.

Vin rested his mare's leg on his shoulder and climbed the stairs.

M7M7M7M7M7M7

Nathan tried again to get Chris to eat some of the broth he'd scooped out of Mary's stew. In the past twelve hours, he'd reheated it three times and each time the gunfighter took a bite or two then pushed away the bowl. It was maddening trying to heal a man whose mindset was to protect even if it meant killing himself. For some insane reason, Chris' brain refused to accept the fact his body was growing sicker; it was a fact it wouldn't be able to ignore much longer.

He watched closely as Larabee dragged his body once again from the chair beside Ezra's bed to the window overlooking the street. He had to hand it to him; he did a good job hiding the shaking in his hands and the stagger in his step, but he couldn't control the flushness of his skin or the pinch around his eyes. There was little doubt his wound carried infection, but he wouldn't allow Nathan near enough to look.

Nathan was considering his options as a healer and a friend when he saw Vin enter the clinic. He went immediately to Chris, doubtless to report his success, or from the look on his face, the lack of success, in tracking down the Nichols family. Larabee lowered his head and turned away, and he heard Vin say, 'We'll keep looking,' before Tanner left the brooding gunfighter and crossed the room to take a seat next to him. Vin nudged him with his elbow and asked, "How ya holdin' up, Nate? Get any sleep last night?"

Nathan didn't take his eyes off Chris. "Some. I take it you didn't find the Nichols."

"Nope, Josiah and I searched everywhere we could think of – even woke several folks up lookin' around – but we came up empty. It's like chasin' ghosts."

"Well, I hope we find 'em soon. Chris ain't gonna last much longer if we don't."

Vin followed Nathan's eyes to where the gunfighter was propped. "He's got ya worried."

"Dang fool won't listen. When he ain't over there talkin' Ezra out of his nightmares he's keepin' watch. Every time I turn around he's on his feet. The only time he's on his back is when he's passed out."

"Yeah, I reckon he ain't the best patient in the world, but you can't change what he feels."

"I may never get a chance to the way he's goin'."

Vin looked away, not knowing what to say.

"Look, I understand the guilt. I was there when those bastards started cuttin' on Ezra. Every time he looked at me, I could feel him beggin' me to make 'em stop, and I should've been able to stop them. If I'd stayed with him…" Nathan paused as the memories began to overwhelm him. He didn't speak again for several moments. When he did, he sounded disturbingly calm. "We got Ezra back and there's a good chance he'll make it. Chris needs to let himself mend so when we do catch up to the Nichols he can be there to see it done."

"You did what you had to ta save Ezra. Chris means to do the same. He ain't tryin' to kill himself, he just can't sit still while those men are still out there. There's a lot more to the way he feels than he's lettin' on. I don't think it's just he feels responsible, I think he's just gettin' tired of evil walkin' into his life and stealin' away what little sense of normal he has. He was settlin' into the idea Four Corners is where he's meant to be and here comes the family from hell tryin' to destroy what he's built. Chris is a fighter, it ain't in him to lie down and take what comes. If you think about it, it's probably that same stubbornness that keeps us all here; I wouldn't care to follow a quitter. "

"I know you're right," the dark man said with a sigh, "but he can sure try a man's patience. He's sick, Vin, sicker than he's willin' to admit."

"You can't stop him if he's got a mind to do this."

"Oh, I can stop him," the healer mumbled.

Tanner tried to pretend he hadn't heard the threat.

Jackson continued. "I just wish I knew where that gang was holed up right now. It don't seem right they've been able to set all these fires and no one's seen any sign of 'em."

"Ain't nothin' been right since they rode into town. While I was out this mornin' I saw Mrs. Candler and her boys comin' in with a wagon; they were bringin' in the body of her husband."

"Aubrey Candler? He's the mill keeper, ain't he?"

"That's right. The Candlers live on a small homestead south o' here."

"What happened to him?"

"Seems his oldest son found him tied to one of those mills of his. He'd been beaten and left hangin', just like Ezra."

"The Nichols," Nathan said sadly.

"Looks like it. I talked to Aubrey's boy before the undertaker came. From what I can figure they must o' come across him followin' Ezra's directions away from Chris' place."

"You plan on tellin' Chris?"

"I was but I reckon he's got enough to think on right now."

"Thanks. You add Candler to his list of folks to worry over and I'll never get him off his feet."

Tanner nodded and slapped a supportive hand to Nathan's shoulder before he stood and moved to the foot of Ezra's bed. "How'd he do last night?" he asked motioning to the gambler.

"Buck said he didn't do well early on, kept fightin' in his sleep. When I checked him this mornin', he was shakin' so hard I couldn't keep 'im still."

"He ain't movin' now," Tanner said as he moved closer and bent over to touch Ezra's face.

"He stopped about an hour ago, hasn't moved since."

"He's burnin' up. Should he be that still?"

"He's just asleep. It's the best thing for him right now."

"You sure? I mean he looks pretty bad." Vin's hand slid to Ezra's fingers. He noted how cold they felt in comparison to the rest of him then spied the fresh bandage around his wrist. They threatened to take his hands? He just couldn't get his head around it, it was inconceivable. Ezra must have been scared half out of his mind.

"He ain't a pretty sight right now, but I do think he's okay sleepin'. I'll wake him in a little while just to be on the safe side."

"I don't reckon I've ever seen him like this before. He's always movin'. Even when he's sittin' at the poker tables he's talkin' with his hands and constantly shufflin' those cards of his. This just ain't natural." He stared at his friend and waited for him to breath. He watched for what felt like an eternity trying to detect the tiniest of movements, and then finally a slow inhalation caused his chest to rise. That was it; that was all there was, just a slow, nearly undetectable rise and fall of the chest. It was too painful to watch, so Vin squeezed the cold fingers, covered them with the sheet and moved away from the bed.

Nathan watched him wander to Chris' side. The gunfighter, who in his opinion leaned a little too heavily on his perch near the window, startled at Vin's approach.

"Hold on, pard, it's just me," Tanner said, offering a steadying hand.

"Sorry," Chris muttered.

"You know sleepin's easier when you're lyin' down."

"I'm not sleeping, I'm thinking."

"About the Nichols?"

"Them… and Hank."

"Yeah, I'm real sorry about Hank. I don't know what made him go after ya like that. I was sure ya'll had settled your differences when we put him on the trail to Mexico."

Chris pushed himself to one side of the dresser he sat on and made room for Vin. "I was too. I have to admit it felt kind of good thinkin' we'd put the past behind us, but I reckon a past like ours is never really put to rest."

Vin propped a leg on the dresser and looked down at Chris' hands. They both revealed uneasy tremors as they fidgeted nervously with the hem of his open shirt. "It's hard to say, but I do think Hank was enjoyin' the peace you'd made too, even if it was for just a little while. If his mind had been right, he'd of gone to Mexico and probably moved on with his life."

"But instead, he's a dead man."

"What happened to Hank wasn't your fault, you do know that."

"He was Sarah's father."

"That don't make him your responsibility."

"Sure as hell feels like it."

"I know, but you need to let it go." Vin watched Chris' hands cross and move beneath his shirt as he literally tried to hold in his grief. "There's somethin' I need to ask ya."

The gunfighter didn't look up. "What's that?"

"Hank's body is still at the undertaker's. You got any idea where he should be buried?"

Chris blanched and his head dropped further.

"You alright?"

Larabee didn't answer.

"I'm sorry; I shouldn't have brought it up."

"No, it's not that. It's…"

Vin waited.

When Chris raised his head there was a look of alarm on his face. "It's just I have no idea. I ain't heard from Hank since Sarah and Adam died. I know his wife died a long time ago, but I have no idea where she's buried. The old man moved his family around quite a bit… I just don't know."

Tanner could see a different kind of panic rising in the eyes of his friend. "It's alright, Chris, we don't have to decide on it now."

"Yes we do. I don't wanna leave him at the undertaker's like that, it ain't decent." Larabee stirred from his seat and tried to rise. When he did, he felt his stomach muscles clench around a sharp pain in his side.

Vin's hand shot out the moment he caught the look on Chris' face and grabbed him by the elbow. "Hang on, I'll get Nathan."

"No."

"But you…"

"I said no."

The tracker looked over his shoulder to see Nathan standing at the cabinet where he stored his medicines. There was a troubled look on his face, but he couldn't tell if the healer had seen Chris' moment of pain or not. Vin drew himself up when he realized he was behaving like a schoolboy hiding something from the teacher. "You need to get some rest, Chris. Nathan's right about that."

"After the Nichols are caught." He blew a long breath past his lips and sat straight as a board. "I can ride it out."

Vin looked again at Nathan and saw him mixing herbs in some hot water, no doubt for pain. He smiled at the healer until he saw him reach for a small brown bottle on the top shelf of the cabinet.

Chris shuddered then slowly began to collect himself.

"Better?"

"Yeah, it just sneaks up on me."

"Large holes in your gut'll do that."

"Shut up, Vin."

Tanner eyed his friend closely, sparing only a glance at Nathan who had replaced the tiny bottle in the cabinet unopened.

"I'm sorry," Chris said after a moment or two of scrutiny. Feeling decidedly uncomfortable, he changed the subject. "About Hank – I think we should bury him with Sarah and Adam."

"You sure?"

"I don't hold what he did against him. He could be a hard ass, but he was Sarah's father and she loved him. Every man should be buried near family."

"I'll take care of it for ya," Vin said. He rose from the corner of the dresser, strode to the window and looked outside. The sun had reached its peak in the sky and its position made him feel oddly calm. There were no long sweeping shadows to distract, no lazy pools of shade in which a man could hide. The sun's brightness brought the whole town into focus at once and he felt compelled to take advantage of the spotlight it offered. "I should get back out there."

"I'm goin' with you," he heard Chris say.

Tanner was stunned and wondered if he'd misunderstood, but when he saw Buck enter the room with the same look of disbelief on his face he knew he'd heard right.

"You're what?" Buck asked.

"I'm gonna help," Chris repeated as he levered himself off the heavy dresser and moved to grab his gun belt from a nearby table.

"I think that fever you've been brewing has settled in your brain. You ain't fit to be goin' after three armed killers."

Larabee wrapped the belt around his waist and buckled it low on his hips. "I don't want an argument, Buck."

"Well that's just too damn bad because you're gonna get one."

Vin stole a fast look at Nathan. The healer took the brown bottle from the cabinet again and tipped its contents into the tea he'd been steeping. Tanner turned to the gunfighter as he began buttoning his shirt. "I think you're gonna want to rethink this, Chris."

"Would you two knock it off? I'm going."

"Chris, you're in pain…"

"And if you're in pain," Nathan interrupted, approaching Larabee with a full cup of tea, "you take somethin' for it. Don't fight with him, Vin, you ain't gonna win."

"You can't be serious," Buck hollered.

Nathan gave Tanner a knowing look before he answered Buck. "I ain't arguin' with him any more. The man wants to drop dead in the street, I can't stop him."

"But," Wilmington began as he watched Chris down the warm tea in a single drink. "I don't believe this."

"I'm going, Buck, believe it," the blonde said firmly.

"Just stay close, Vin. Maybe you can catch his stubborn hide before it hits the dirt," Jackson advised.

Vin stepped nearer.

Chris paused and scanned the room – he needed to reload his weapon but decided he could do it at the jail since he needed to go there to grab an extra rifle. He blinked his eyes against the growing ache in his head and only just noticed the worried faces staring at him. For some vague reason he felt the need to explain his decision to leave the clinic but decided his men knew him well enough to already know the answer. It was then his eyes trailed to Ezra's idle body on the bed. He wanted more than anything for the gambler's motionless form to jerk or twitch or show any sign of life at all, but nothing happened. He brought a hand to his temple. "Nathan?"

"Yeah?"

"Ezra, he…"

"I don't know, Chris." Jackson saw the sadness in his friend and knew how deeply it ran. Vin was right – he truly wasn't trying to kill himself. He simply had had enough of the evil that flowed through his life. In that instant, the healer almost regretted his actions – almost.

The blonde swayed and stumbled as he turned to leave but Nathan didn't know if it was because of the drug he'd just dosed him with or because his body was finally giving out. Regardless, he moved closer and waited.

"Take care of him, Nate," Chris slurred as the room reeled around him. He took three steps and then staggered. A hand appeared from nowhere, offering support, and he blindly grabbed hold.

"Chris?" Vin called.

"I'm alright. I told you, I can ride it out."

"Sure you can, but maybe you should do it sittin' down."

He pulled away in frustration and aimed himself at the door. "It's time to put an end to this."

Tanner watched his friend clutch at his belly with one hand and grab for the dresser with the other. It was a full minute before he straightened and reached for the door knob. It was then Vin spotted the blood on his fingers. "Chris, you're bleedin' again."

"It's… 'salright… let's g-go."

Buck suddenly became aware his friend was on the verge of passing out. He slid himself between Chris and the door and hooked him under the arms. Without waiting for permission, he dragged him backwards to the cot and sat him down. "Damn it, Chris, this is crazy," Buck barked.

Larabee watched as his friends' faces floated in front of him. They were speaking to him, well actually yelling at him, but he was to the point he didn't care. He knew what he had to do, why couldn't they understand? He tried to push himself up again, but there were hands all over him pushing him back down, and despite his best efforts he couldn't resist. His brain had lost control of his limbs and no matter how he willed it there was no getting that control back. There was a feeling spreading across his body, a feeling he recognized from times past, and it suddenly dawned on him it wasn't his body betraying him. It was something else, someone else… "N-Nathan," he managed to say despite the numbness around his mouth. The healer's face came close to his and he could feel warm hands holding his head up. "W-what did you do?"

"Take it easy, Chris, just rest."

"You tricked… me… lied…"

"No, Chris, I didn't lie to ya. I told you I wouldn't mess with you if you didn't mess with me."

His mouth was beginning to fail him. "D-didn't m-mess… you… son-m-btch."

Buck came to Jackson's defense. "No, you asshole, Nathan likes it when the men in his care try to kill themselves. Now shut up and go to sleep."

Chris thrust his hand forward and tried to grab something with which to hoist him off the cot.

Buck easily swiped the hand aside. "No, pard, you're gonna rest."

The blackness skirting his vision slowly crept inwards and took away the light, his friends and his consciousness.

Seconds later, Buck watched as Chris slumped to one side and drifted into oblivion. "Thank God," he said as he straightened the gunfighter's body on the cot. "He's the most stubborn man I've ever known. I was…"

FIRE! Someone yelled from the street. There's a fire!

Vin snatched his weapon by the door and headed out onto the landing. He could see Josiah come running from the livery and meet up with Joseph Hobson in the street, who was apparently the person doing the shouting. Tanner hurried down the stairs.

"There's a fire down at the newspaper office," gasped Hobson.

"Oh crap," the tracker said before he and Josiah broke into a run towards the Clarion.

TBC

A/N: Now no one REALLY believed the Nichols left town, did they? They're closer than you think. Thanks again to the folks who offered feedback. I'm sure Chris and Ezra feel better knowing they have your support. I've been a little mean to them so they're both pouting at me. JMck