Early update for Mrs. 11th's birthday because this chapter is full of Mari and Esther and they are her favourite ship. Thanks for all the feedback!
When the night gets cold
And the lights go out
The sun is gone behind the clouds
When you feel lost, then I'll reach out
To guide you home with my lighthouse
Lighthouse - G.R.L
After Aliya was showered and dried, a trip to the wardrobe had her sifting through racks to grab something new to wear. Still wrapped in a towel but with her hair blessedly dry and not full of lake water, she had just picked up a pair of dark denim jeans when a voice from behind her made her jump.
"Quite the collection."
Aliya whirled around to see Mari standing nearby, leaning on a wall for support. "Mari? What the hell are you doing in here?"
"I wanted a change of clothes. Obviously."
"You don't need a change of clothes, you need to be back in bed, resting," she told her, fixing her with a glare, and it wasn't until Mari gave her a funny look that she realised how motherly she had sounded. She flushed. "Er, please?"
"No," Mari replied simply, "That room reminds me of the ones underground where Kovarian kept me that year."
"Oh. Sorry."
"Don't apologise."
Aliya bit her lip. "Well, there are a lot of other rooms where you could lie down instead. You can barely stand up."
Very pointedly, Mari pushed away from the wall and stood without support, her arms spread to prove her point. It didn't stop a slight wobble in one of her legs. Aliya was sure if she marched over there and pushed her hard enough she'd go topping to the ground.
"Fine, be stubborn," Aliya muttered, grabbing a plain white blouse and some underwear from a nearby rack and going into one of the changing areas to drop the towel and get dressed. By the time she emerged (the silver locket beneath her shirt), Mari had put on some shorts and a baggy jumper and was fixing her hair in the mirror.
The jumper was one of Aliya's favourites, but she knew immediately that she didn't have the guts to say so.
"Put those on," Mari told her, nodding towards a pair of floral print Doc Martens nearby.
Aliya frowned, and nearly told her to get stuffed and mind her own business. Then she just exhaled and did as suggested. Sure enough, one look in the mirror told her that the pink on the boots definitely complimented the otherwise plain outfit.
"Have you ever thought about wearing a tie?" Mari asked, coming to stand next to her.
"Not really."
The redhead held a black one up. "Try it. I think it would suit you."
"I have no idea how to tie it."
"Fine. Turn to face me."
Aliya did as she was told, and Mari looped the strip of material around her neck and began tying it with hands that knew exactly what they were doing. The older of the two supposed that going to a human secondary school would leave one with this particular skill.
When it was done, sitting high but not as tight as it would be in a truly formal setting, Aliya looked back to the mirror to see that sure enough it looked fantastic against the dark white of her blouse.
"Put that with a dark jacket or cardigan and you'd be completely sorted."
Aliya touched the tie thoughtfully. "Perhaps. I'll give it a try, anyway."
"Mari! What are you doing up?"
The Doctor's voice, having been absent for so long, made both of them jump and whirl around to see him standing in the wardrobe doorway, eyeing them quite curiously.
"I dislike the infirmary," Mari said.
"Oh. Oh! But that's okay, that's good, even!" He said, squeaking with excitement. "Because of what I've been - because of why I came to find you in the first place. Haven't you wondered where I've been?"
"Vaguely."
"Well, come on then!" The Doctor threw his hands up in the air when they didn't move. "Follow me!"
They moved to do just that, and while he was caught up in leading the way to whatever he was showing them, Aliya was all too aware of how Mari had turned an alarming shade of white. Her walking was also shaky at best.
"Do you-" Aliya made herself get the words out, "Do you need to lean on me?"
Mari's eyes flicked to her with surprise, and for a second it looked like she was considering taking the offer. But then her head shook adamantly. So they pressed on, but luckily the walk wasn't too long.
The Doctor came to a stop outside a door, and Aliya read the sign on it only to gape. Of course.
"It says Mari on it," Mari murmured.
"Yeah, it does," the Doctor said, smiling at her widely, "And that bit underneath is your full name in Gallifreyan."
Her hand reached out to touch the carved circular symbols. "Mariakanerolunar?" She looked at them with faint amusement. "I hope you realise how much of a ridiculous and pretentious name that is."
Aliya grinned. "Mine's even worse."
"Yes, it is," Mari replied, snorting. "Though I suppose ridiculous and pretentious is something you and he do quite well."
"From time to time."
A red eyebrow went up. "Was that a bad time travel pun?"
Aliya laughed, ignoring the curious gaze of the Doctor. "Yes. If by bad you mean utterly brilliant." Mari rolled her eyes, but good naturedly.
"Guys, I'm trying to show you something," the Doctor interrupted, frowning at them, "And you're getting distracted by puns. Also, since when are you two chuckle buddies, anyway?"
"Chuckle buddies?"
He made a face. "Let's forget I said that."
"Not likely."
With a huff, the Doctor pushed the door open to reveal the room inside, which proved to be an adequate distraction. The room was spacious but not incredibly so, with walls of plum and a circular bed that had a duvet of the same colour. One of the walls was taken up entirely by a bookcase that was partially filled already with textbooks and journals on alien physiology - to further her studies as a physician. The carpet was a pleasant grey and there was a large round window that showed an - obviously fake - view of Cardiff bay.
"This is for me?" Mari whispered, eyes wide as they stepped inside and came to stand in the center of the room.
"I know you live with Esther," the Doctor said, "But I thought it might be nice for you to have a place here. In case you ever wanted to come on a trip or two with us and Jenny. A space for just you so that you could get away from us ridiculous pretentious Time Lords."
She let out a tiny laugh of disbelief. "I - thank you." Her hand came to rest on his arm, and she gave him a very genuine smile. "Thank you."
"You're very welcome."
Part of Aliya wasn't so pleased about being left out of another room creation for one of their children, but then she would have felt strange even now helping design it and the Doctor didn't even know of the leap she and Mari had just made.
"So, what do you think?" The Doctor asked. "Should we grab Jenny and go find an adventure?"
Mari stared at him. "You just escaped certain death, is that not enough of an adventure for one day?" When he just shrugged, she bit her lip. "Look, it's a wonderful offer. And I imagine that one day soon I'll take you up on it, but at the moment I have a lot to think about-" Her gaze drifted to Aliya, "And I think I would like to go home."
Aliya gave her a tiny smile and nodded, and the Doctor again looked at them, trying to understand. Then his focus finally landed on the handmade necklace around his daughter's neck. He froze, his eyes flicking between the two of them.
"You-"
"Got over myself," Aliya answered, "And gave my daughter what was owed to her."
Mari ducked her head a little when she saw the raw emotion in the Doctor's eyes, and Aliya found herself wanting to do the same. It was a little difficult to stomach how happy he was when they were so unsure of where they stood despite this new development.
"We're still not friends," Aliya told him, "Don't get any ideas about that. But I think now, we want to try."
Mari lifted her head and gave her a tiny nod. "May I take one of those volumes from the room home with me?"
The Doctor beamed. "Yeah, course you can!"
She smiled and moved to the bookshelf to select one, and held it reverently for a few moments. Then her head jerked up. "Aliya, I need you to take the book, I'm feeling very faint. Father, if you could help me remain upright it would be appreciated."
Only Mari would speak like that when about to collapse, Aliya thought as she grabbed the book from her hands. The Doctor rushed to sling her arm around his shoulders so that when her legs shook and her eyes unfocused, she didn't fall to the floor.
"You still with us?" Aliya asked her.
"More or less," Mari replied slowly, "Though currently, more of the less."
"Sense of humour in tact, at least," the Doctor said wryly.
"Hardly. I'm not so sure I even have one."
He hoisted her up so that he had a more secure grip on her and made his way to the door so that they could head for the console room.
"If you're still adamant about going home, we'd better get you back to your girlfriend and give her some very strict instructions about bed rest," he told her as they walked.
"So this is what it's like to have parents," Mari muttered, and Aliya and the Doctor shared amused looks. "You're going to be even more annoying now, aren't you?"
"Sorry, yeah, practically in the job description. Ask your sister," the Doctor said, grinning.
Once they got to the console room, the Doctor kept Mari steady on her feet while Aliya piloted the ship to Cardiff. They materialised in the Hub with a perfect landing.
"Thank you," Mari said to them, "I believe I'm alright to stand for a small while."
She pulled away from the Doctor and headed for the TARDIS doors, so the Doctor and Aliya followed, the latter picking up the book she had briefly put down to fly the ship. They stepped out of the TARDIS just in time to see that the Hub had come to a complete standstill.
Every single member of Torchwood Three was staring at Mari, who was standing there in bare feet and shorts with a baggy jumper, looking quite sickly.
"Mari!"
Esther ran to her girlfriend and hugged her before kissing her passionately with little care for their audience. Hart's appreciative wolf whistle was ignored by all. Finally they pulled away, which was good because the kiss had progressed to the point of making everyone around them vaguely uncomfortable.
"What happened?" Esther asked Mari, hands still in her hair. "It's been weeks, we thought you were dead-"
Mari shook her head and kissed her again, hard. "I'm here, darling," she said softly, "I'm hardly an easy person to kill, though I won't say that someone didn't try."
That was when Jenny rushed in to embrace her sister, hugging the two of them. "I'm so glad you're okay!"
"Jenny," the Doctor breathed, and when she turned to look at him, he closed the distance between them in only a few strides and hugged his blonde daughter to him with a crushing force. He had thought he was never going to see her again.
Aliya smiled at the sight before her, the reunions that had seemed impossible only hours ago, and it wasn't long before she was pulled into the Doctor and Jenny's embrace and laughing from sheer elation and relief. For the first time in a long time she felt herself relaxing.
"So what actually happened?" Jenny asked them once the hugging was over.
"Some people tried to kill me, by forcing Mari to do it," the Doctor explained to the room, "We managed to get around it. Oh, but if anyone asks, I'm dead and Aliya's piloting the TARDIS on her own now. That's quite important actually, please remember that."
"You faked your own death?" Jack asked, eyebrow up.
"Rather brilliantly, might I add," his friend replied, smiling at his own genius. "Even had Aliya fooled - which isn't necessarily a good thing, she's still a bit cross about it."
"Twelve. Hours. Handcuffed to a railing," Aliya said flatly, making sure to show how supremely unimpressed she was and that she was indeed still annoyed.
Jenny gaped. "While thinking he was dead?"
"Yes. The 'faking' part of the whole thing wasn't in the initial plan, and I wasn't informed of the change."
"You actually thought you were going to die before that? Oh my god you did, didn't you?" Jenny asked her father, horrified realisation dawning on her face. "That's why you were both acting so weird last time I saw you."
Over Jenny's shoulder, while he hugged her so tightly that it seemed unlikely she was able to breathe properly if at all, the Doctor allowed his face to show his true melancholy at having to say goodbye to his daughter.
Aliya's hearts were heavy and it was all she could do to not cry her eyes out. The thought of having to return soon and tell Jenny that her father had gone to his death was an absolutely awful one.
"Hurry back," Jenny told him when he eventually pulled away and put his forced smile back on.
"Yeah," he said, voice thick with the emotion he was trying to suppress.
"Are you alright, Dad?"
"Course I am, I'm the King of Alright." It didn't sound particularly convincing, so he smiled all the wider while touching her chin lightly until she smiled back at him. "There we are."
The Doctor now looked at his blonde daughter with great remorse and apology in his eyes. He brushed some hair out of her face.
"I'm sorry, Jenny. I just didn't know how to say a proper goodbye. Or tell you that I had to die."
Jenny bit her lip, and then her eyes widened. "You knew way before that, didn't you? That was why you didn't want me onboard! The secret!"
He nodded. "I didn't want you relying on me even more when I thought I was going to have to leave you-" She lunged forward to hug him again, fiercely, "But it's over now, I found a way around it," he continued, his chin resting on the top of her head, "And I would like nothing more for you to come with us, if that's still what you want."
Jenny pulled away to beam at him, a few tears in her eyes that she hastily wiped away because they didn't match her now ecstatic mood. "Yes! Of course I still want that!"
The Doctor and Aliya exchanged relieved grins right before Jenny pulled them in for another excited hug.
"When do we leave?"
"Well, I was thinking now-ish," the Doctor admitted, scratching his cheek, "Just need to talk to your sister for a second."
"Okay," Jenny said, still grinning, "Hey Jack, are you going to be mad that I'm leaving indefinitely?"
"No, but maybe utterly heartbroken," the brunet immortal told her melodramatically. "We can manage here though. We'll just miss that lovely smile of yours. Always brightens up my day."
"Aw, well we'll be sure to stop in for visits," she promised him, "I mean, I've got to see my sister."
The Doctor was meanwhile approaching the sister in question. She was busy conversing with her girlfriend as well as Gwen and Hart and Rex, who all seemed to be glad to see her alive even if the latter two were doing a good job of hiding it. Seeing Hart and Mari get on, albeit strangely, was an unexpected sight, but funny more than anything else.
"Now, Esther, you've got to promise to make her stay in bed, alright?" The Doctor asked the female immortal.
"I'm sure she can manage that," Hart muttered, only to get a dig in the ribs from Mari's elbow.
"Bed rest," the Doctor said more firmly, flushing a little, "You all know I meant bed rest. She nearly died of an allergic reaction to a sedative not ten hours ago, her system is still recovering."
"Told you that you looked like shit, Legs," Hart said cheerfully, only to get a glare from the redhead.
"Is that true?" Esther asked Mari with concern.
Mari nodded a bit reluctantly. "Yes. Speaking of which, I may need to lean on you now." Esther wound an arm around her waist and took some of her weight easily. "Thank you."
"Don't worry, Doctor, I'll take good care of her," Esther promised the man in the bowtie, and he smiled at her.
"Thank you, Esther." He then fixed his gaze on his daughter. "Goodbye, Mari. I hope you feel better soon."
"As do I," Mari replied, her voice quieter now that her energy had again waned, "Goodbye Father. Don't feel that you have to stay away long."
While around them the other members of the Torchwood team were visibly surprised at her use of the word 'father', the Doctor just smiled at her. "How does three weeks sound?"
Mari smiled back. "Workable." Then her gaze moved to where Aliya still stood near the TARDIS. "And Aliya - thank you."
Exactly what for, she didn't say, but Aliya could imagine what she probably meant. For her help in the alternate timeline, for pulling her out of the lake, for watching over her in the infirmary, for giving her the necklace...
Aliya gave her a tiny smile. "You're very welcome. Oh!" She remembered the book in her hands. "And don't forget this." She hurried forward to give her the alien medical text which Mari accepted with a nod and clutched to her side.
"Are there pigs with wings outside?" Jack asked. "Are you two...getting along?"
"My mother and I would prefer that everyone could keep their noses out of our relationship for the moment, thank you Harkness," Mari said tiredly, ignoring how his, Jenny's and Esther's eyebrows shot up at what she had called Aliya. "And I'd like to go home now."
Esther nodded and they started to make their way to the exit.
"We'll see you soon," Jenny said to her sister, who smiled at her.
"I'm counting on it, Princess. Find some place interesting to show me for when you come back here. Father took me to that cavern with bioluminescent flora, it'll have to be good to impress me after that."
"You mean you'll come on a trip?"
"Yes. A trip. If it's worth going on."
"I'll make sure it is."
"Good. Take care of yourself, Jenny."
With that, Mari and Esther left, and Aliya felt it was time for her and Jenny and the Doctor to make their exit as well. She put her hand on Jenny's shoulder.
"Ready to go?"
"Just about," Jenny replied, before rushing to hug all of the members of Torchwood Three and say enthusiastic goodbyes - even Rex and Hart. Her hug with Jack, though, was the most affectionate by far. "I'll miss you, Jack."
"I'll miss you too," he told her, "But one of us has to give your dad hell and I've got to keep this place from turning into a shambles."
"Didn't stop you ditching us to chase after him one time before," Gwen muttered.
"That was ages ago!"
Jenny just grinned. "Bye, Jack." She gave him a friendly salute, which he returned with a large grin, and then she ran to join Aliya and the Doctor at the TARDIS door.
"Ready?" Aliya asked her.
"I was born ready. Literally."
The three Gallifreyans laughed as they piled into the police box with hearts lighter than they had been in a very long time. Being together around the console, unable to do anything but keep grinning at each other, felt completely and utterly right.
Bed rest with Esther, unsurprisingly, was quite a pleasant experience (even if Mari's whole body ached and there was nothing going on that Hart would have approved of). Esther made her soup and brought her hot drinks with lemon and honey and there was something so domestic about the whole thing that Mari couldn't be sure if she found it comforting or just completely bizarre.
Mari used her time in bed to write the letter to the Doctor that had once shaken her so badly to read. The first time she was feeling well enough to walk about for a small period of time (three days after her return to Cardiff), a quick trip to Victorian London to find a certain maid with the same name as her sister proved successful and she had wasted no time in returning.
Now her part in that mess was truly complete and Mari could relax, her life blissfully free of any impending destiny or certain future. Well, almost blissful.
There was one problem - Esther couldn't understand how Mari refused to bathe. And she was finally putting her foot down.
"You can't just not wash!"
"Do you have any idea how incredibly American that sentence sounded?" Mari asked mildly, turning the page of the crime novel she was reading.
"Mari."
"Are you honestly trying to tell me that I smell? We both know that it's not true."
"Just because your weird alien biology doesn't do nearly as much in the way of body odour, doesn't mean you should neglect personal hygiene altogether. You never have before."
"Please, Es, just leave it," Mari said, her voice quiet. Esther sat down on the edge of the bed and put her hand over Mari's book so that she couldn't continue reading.
"Babe, talk to me," the blonde asked. Mari finally looked up at her girlfriend, whose warm brown eyes were full of concern. How could she possibly explain? How could she vocalise something so stupid? "What's wrong? And don't try and say nothing because we both know that's bullshit."
Mari bit her lip. "I'm...frightened."
"Of what?"
"Of being frightened. I think -I think I have a new fear, but it's so infantile that I suppose I've been pretending that if I can just avoid it, it has no way of being real."
Esther frowned. "What is it?"
"I was in that lake for so long," Mari whispered, "Before and after. Just floating, the water all around me, and I was so sure that I was going to die there. That I would never see you again and that my body would sink down to the bottom of the lake in that damned suit and rot. And when Aliya got me out...Es, I couldn't even look at the lake without completely losing my sense."
"So, it's the water?"
The redhead gave a tiny nod. "I didn't realise at first. That I was avoiding it. Which is so ridiculous because we live by the damned ocean, but even just the thought of being near any large amount of it-"
Esther grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze. "We'll do it together, okay? Come on."
They got up from the bed and went to the bathroom. Already, Mari's hearts picked up their pace, and not in a way that was pleasant.
"Not the bath," she whispered.
Esther thankfully appeared to understand why any kind of submersion in water was not going to work. "No, we'll try the shower. That's not too much water at once."
Mari, without even realising she had done it until her back hit the wall, backed away when Esther moved to start the shower up. The moment she pulled on the handle and the water burst from the showerhead, water that was intended for her, Mari couldn't breathe.
The pain in her chest might have made her cry out if she hadn't started hyperventilating. As she gasped for air, intense heat crept up her neck and she felt incredibly dizzy. Her vision went hazy and it felt like her hearts were likely to just stop at any moment. Was this what death felt like? She wouldn't be surprised. Perhaps a small part of her knew that she was not currently in any danger, but that part couldn't be heard over the screaming of her mind and body.
She lost the ability to think and everything turned into a blur.
"Mari..."
She eventually registered Esther's voice and what she was saying. As the panic attack faded, Mari opened her eyes - which she didn't even remember squeezing shut - to look into Esther's brown ones. They were on the floor of the bathroom, and the way Mari's legs were positioned underneath her told her that they'd given out on her. She could feel a film of tears drying on her cheeks.
A flash of memory came back to her, of Esther trying to get near her to calm her down.
"Don't touch me!"
She had screamed it, from where she had curled up in the corner, screamed at Esther of all people. Was this what people with anxiety had to deal with all the time? This hell of not being in control of your own body when things got truly bad?
"Mari, can you hear me?" Esther was asking quietly. She still wasn't touching her, but was close now, kneeling right opposite her.
"Yes," Mari murmured. Her eyes flicked to the shower and saw that it was off. Her breathing lightened a little.
"Are you okay now?"
"Other than apparently being rather debilitatingly hydrophobic, sure, I'm just brilliant."
"Can I touch you now?"
She was being so damned gentle. It was horrific and made Mari want to be sick. Since when had she been the weak one? Since when had she been fragile? But she truly did feel like at the moment the right thing would have the ability to shatter her into a thousand pieces.
"Please do," Mari whispered, and Esther pulled her into a warm embrace, her hands stroking over the sweat soaked red hair at the back of her neck. Mari held onto her with desperation, because Esther was her lifeline when the world turned inside out. Always had been and always would be.
"I'm sorry, I thought it wasn't that bad, that you just needed to be eased into it," Esther told her, guilt in her voice as if she were the one who had done something wrong, which was ridiculous, "I'm so sorry."
"It's not your fault," Mari said, her head resting on her girlfriend's shoulder, "You weren't to know."
"A friend of mine in the CIA used to get panic attacks, and eating something after always made her feel better. I'll make you cupcakes or something. How does that sound?"
"Can we just stay like this for a while longer?" Mari asked.
"Of course."
They stayed like that for another five minutes, clutching each other on the tilted floor. Finally, and slowly, they got up and made their way to the kitchen. Esther made cupcakes, and once Mari had eaten three, the blonde sat down next to her on the couch and took her hand.
"I want to try something else," she said to Mari slowly, "Do you think you'd be okay with the tap in the bathroom sink being on?"
"...I don't know."
"What if you shut your eyes? The sound of running water isn't so much the problem, right?"
"That might be alright. And it's probably best that I learn my boundaries, however unpleasant that process might be."
They went back to the bathroom and stood in front of the wide mirror above the counter that held the sink. Mari stared at her pale, red eyed reflection and tried not to hate herself.
"Do you trust me?" Esther whispered, pulling a strand of hair back from her neck.
"Of course."
"Okay."
Esther grabbed a hair tie and put her girlfriend's hair up in a messy bun before starting to unbutton Mari's shirt. Once that was on the floor, she moved to her jeans, which Mari wriggled out of to assist her. The bra came off too, leaving her standing there in nothing but a flimsy pair of knickers.
"Close your eyes. I'm going to turn the tap on."
Mari did as she was told, and while her body tensed a little at the sound of the running water, no panic came. When the sound died, she cracked an eye open to see Esther finishing wringing out a wet flannel.
"Okay so far?" Esther asked.
"Yes."
Slowly, and again so terribly gently, Esther brought the flannel to Mari's collarbone and swept across until she was at her shoulder and moving down the line of her arm. When Mari remained silent, she kept going, running the flannel across her body and leaving tiny droplets of water behind on the newly washed skin.
There was, strangely, nothing erotic about it. But that didn't mean that it wasn't the most frighteningly intimate moment they had ever shared, or that Mari had ever shared with anyone.
Their eyes met in the mirror while Esther stood behind her and ran the flannel over Mari's back.
"I don't deserve you," Mari said simply.
Esther frowned. "I've never understood it when people say things like that. I mean, I'm not yours in any way that would mean what you deserve matters. I don't think anyone ever is."
"I don't deserve your kindness, then. I'm not a good person."
"You're good to me. So I'm good to you. That's how this whole relationship thing is meant to work, remember? We take care of each other, even when shit happens and things get hard. One day something bad will happen to me and I'll need you the way that you need me right now. And I know you'll be there."
Mari crossed her arms over her torso. "But...why? Why do you like me enough to want to be with me in the first place? I don't have enough desirable traits to make up for my atrocious ones or my body count. Even after months I still have no idea why you seem to like me because of who I am and not just because of how I feel about you."
Esther put the flannel on the sink, and turned back to Mari, a disheartened look in her eyes. "This is an actually baffling concept for you, isn't it? Being likeable."
"As it happens, yes."
The blonde sighed and leaned against the bathroom counter. "Why I like you...okay, well, you're loyal to a fault."
"When I'm not planning deceitful murder-"
"Your whole bitchy attitude is usually pretty funny, now that it's not directed me."
"But it was directed at you for a long time, and not in any way that could possibly be amusing because I was literally just insulting you-"
Esther ignored her interruptions and kept going. "I like the way you talk, how it's so proper that cuss words just don't sound quite right coming out of your mouth." Mari didn't have a retort for that one, and just pursed her lips together. "I like the way you walk, with those stupid heels that no one should be able to walk in let alone fight in."
"It's literally just because I hate feeling short and I'm vain enough to want my legs to look good-"
"And more than anything, I like how I know that you are capable of being one of the scariest people I've ever met, and of creatively killing anyone you want...but then if you're with just Jenny, or me, the ice queen melts. I like that there's someone softer in there that hides behind the glaring and the threats."
Mari shifted uncomfortably under her gaze and bent to grab her shirt and pull it back on so that she didn't have to be so physically as well as emotionally bare in that moment.
"Also, you scrunch your nose up when you sleep and it's adorable," Esther added, smirking when Mari's hand immediately went to her nose.
"Adorable," Mari muttered, scowling, "My last self worked her entire life to ensure she would never be called anything so ridiculous."
"There are worse things to be called."
"Possibly. I'm not entirely convinced."
Esther laughed and reached to pull the hair tie from Mari's hair, letting the red curls fall back down to their natural position around her shoulders and back. "Was that okay? The manual wash? Did it feel better?"
"Yes, it was, and yes, it does."
"Okay. That's good."
"Thank you," Mari whispered, "For everything."
She hugged Esther to her, holding her tight and knowing that no matter what Esther might have said, she didn't and would never deserve her girlfriend. But that wasn't to say that she wasn't about to start trying to.
"Now, are you sure you're alright to come with me to the curry place?" Esther asked for the third time as Mari laced up her boots.
"Yes, I'm completely sure," Mari told her, also for the third time, "I need some fresh air for more than just a few minutes. Now come on, I'm famished."
They stepped out into the bitter wind, gloved hands clasped as they walked.
"You still feeling okay?"
Mari rolled her eyes. "Es, we're only walking. I'm not so weak that I can't handle walking. Now, if you asked me to run a marathon, or even to the end of the street, we might have a problem, but walking is perfectly fine, thank you."
"Sorry," Esther said bashfully, "But I'm allowed to worry, you know. I promised the Doctor that I'd look after you."
"And it's very sweet of you, but I'm not made of glass, Es," the redhead reached out to tuck a strand of blonde hair back into the beanie it had escaped from, and leaned in closer so that her nose was touching her girlfriend's cheek. "Of course, if you wanted to perform a very thorough physical examination of me once we're back at your apartment-"
Esther snorted. "You're incorrigible."
"And you've been withholding sex," Mari complained, putting an arm around her waist and pressing her nose into her skin a bit harder, "Out of an oh so noble concern for my medical well being."
"Yeah, because your dad told me to."
"I believe what he actually said was that I needed bed rest, which I've now gotten. You are now free to utterly ravish me at first opportunity without his disapproval."
Esther laughed at her. "So you're saying that he'd approve if I were to do it now?"
"Well, he's a floundering awkward idiot who turns pink the moment anyone so much as mentions sex, so I imagine he tries not to think about it," Mari considered, dropping the joking manner that only seemed to come out around Esther, "But he's never not treated me like an adult, I doubt he conforms to the horrific parent stereotype of trying to preserve his daughter's innocence."
"Or maybe Aliya told him about that time she walked in on you and Rex having sex and he decided the damage was done."
"How do you know about that?!"
"When it happened, Aliya came to me to complain about it later."
"Oh."
"Yeah."
"...so are you saying no to sex later, then?"
"You really know how to take the romance out of it, don't you-"
Esther didn't get a chance to finish her sentence, because Mari took the remark as a challenge and brought the hand that wasn't around her waist up to her face so that she could pull her into a firm kiss. Their walk had slowed during their debate but now it stopped completely as Esther kissed her back with only the smallest hesitation.
There had not been enough kisses like this since the bed rest had started. Before being sedated inside the astronaut suit, Mari had floated in that lake and been sure that she was going to die there. That she was never going to see or touch Esther again.
But she had been wrong, because here she was, kissing the woman who had unknowingly been a guiding light when everything else had been so murky, who had forgiven her immediately for any wrong she had committed in the past. The only thing in her mind, in her hands, under her lips, was Esther.
It wasn't until the human's stomach rumbled very loudly that they broke apart. The laughter that came immediately after was difficult and strange given how out of breath they were.
"Food first, sex later," Esther panted, grinning.
Mari grinned back as they resumed walking. "That sounds good to me."
They were almost at the takeaway Indian joint when they found themselves in an alley off the street they had been walking down. Mari had no idea why they had walked into it.
"Why did we come down here?" Esther asked, turning to frown at her.
I have a bad feeling about this, Mari thought as trepidation crept up her spine, and sure enough several familiar figures emerged from the shadows, explaining in a single second how they had gone down the alley without knowing why.
"What the hell are those things?" Esther exclaimed, while Mari wanted to be sick.
It wasn't fair, she had - as far as they knew - done exactly what they wanted. She just wanted to be left alone, she just wanted peace, couldn't they simply leave her be?
"Mariakanerolunar," one of the memory-proof creatures rasped. "You will come with us."
"She's not going anywhere with you," Esther told it, glaring and gripping Mari's hand all the tighter, "Whoever you might be."
"Es, it's them," Mari whispered, "The ones I told you about. The ones you forget."
"...oh god." Then Esther stood up straighter and lifted her chin defiantly. "If you want to take my girlfriend, you'll have to go through me first. And that's not as easy as it might look."
The creature that had spoken lifted its arm at her, but Mari was quick to jump in front of her.
"No," she said, glaring at it, "And I am not coming with you. I did what you asked, I killed the Doctor at Lake Silencio. I ascertained that his partner was not a threat to the Question. Leave. Me. Be."
"You will come," it repeated, "Kovarian demands an audience."
"No."
"Kill the other."
Ignoring Mari's shout of protest, Esther just sneered at them. "Good luck with that, because I can't be killed."
"...take the other."
"No!" Mari yelled, stretching her arms behind her as if that would protect Esther from them. Then her head dropped in defeat. "I'll come."
"Mari, no-"
"I have to," the redhead replied, turning to face her and cupping her cheek with a gloved hand, "It's the only way I can keep you safe."
"But they can't hurt me-"
"They can't kill you. But they could hurt you for centuries because of that, if they wanted to. In ways that could break your mind entirely no matter how immortal you are. And they would do that, if they needed to control me. Stay here. Go home. I'll try to hurry back."
Esther shook her head. "I can't just let you go with them, they already left you for dead once, who knows what they might do now!"
"We don't have a choice." Mari did not allow herself to cry, but it was a difficult feat to manage. She hugged Esther quickly and left a kiss on her cheek before turning away and walking towards the creature that seemed to be in charge. "Get on with it, then."
One of the other creatures pulled out a device that had to be a temporal teleport, and adjusted a dial on it. In the meantime, Mari turned back to Esther, knowing that there was a chance she might never make it back alive.
"I love you," she said, and Esther's eyes welled up with tears. It looked like she wanted to reply but had the words caught in her throat, and before she managed to get them out, Mari's vision went white as the teleport activated.
As with any time travel that wasn't the TARDIS, the temporal teleport left Mari nauseous and dizzy. The Silence grabbed her by her shoulders and dragged her down a bland white corridor until they went through a door that led to a dim corridor with unfriendly stone walls and floors.
It didn't take her long to work out that it was a cell block, although all the cells seemed to be empty.
One they passed did contain a surprising amount of personal effects, though, making Mari wonder if perhaps the occupant was simply off getting a checkup or something.
She was unceremoniously thrown into the cell next door. By the time she turned around, the corridor was empty and she couldn't remember how she had gotten there. Her lack of memory provided a strong guess, though.
With nothing else to do she sat down on the bed and waited. When it became apparent that no one was coming for her any time soon, she lay down properly and tried to get comfortable. For most people it would have been a difficult feat on such a meagre cot but she had made herself accustomed to lack of comfort a long time ago.
After about four hours, a shout of surprise woke her from the state of near meditation she had entered.
"What are you doing in here?" A man in what had to be a guard uniform outside her cell asked, eyes wide. "No one's allowed to be near her-"
"It shouldn't come as a surprise, but I didn't actually ask to be here," Mari told him scathingly.
He flushed and dug a holoscreen out of his pocket so that he could sift through charts of cell blocks and various writing which had to be names of prisoners. Assuming that she was in a prison of some kind, which was the only reasonable guess she currently had.
"Oh," he said, frowning, "A temporary storage for pending exterior sentencing."
Mari didn't like the sound of that at all. But something he had said before that caught her attention. "You said that no one is allowed to be near her. Who were you talking about? The person who lives in the clearly inhabited cell next to me but seems to not be here at the moment?"
The guard made a face. "Doctor River Song. She sort of...comes and goes. Didn't want her being a bad influence on anyone else."
If Mari weren't so good at keeping her facial expressions under control, she might have gaped.
For those who are confused right now, maybe go back and reread the Deafening Silence epilogue. You're about to see the events of that from Mari's POV. If you still had any doubt I have been playing a long game, this should prove it.
Thanks for reading, let me know what you thought!
-MayFairy :)
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EvenEth13 - I'm so glad you found last chapter exciting! Hopefully you loved this one too, thanks!