Chapter 6 – The Past Today
JD threw the backstage door open with a slam, a massive grin on his face and his tiny tree in his right arm. He merrily marched in with Cox trotting behind him with an equally large frown. "Do not worry, everyone!" JD declared, holding up his free hand gallantly. "I returned with our fabulous Christmas tree!" He gently set down the tree on a table.
Daffy stood on tiptoes as everyone crowded around JD, Cox, and the tree. "Where is it?" he asked. "All I see is some dying scrawny weed."
JD's smile dropped slightly. "JD, didn't I tell you to go find an extravagant tree?" Trillian said disappointedly.
"Time to deck the halls with your incompetence," the booze-downing robot Bender hooted.
"Lemme think where'd be a nice place for this tree of yours?" the returned Janitor pondered, resting on his mop. "How about up your ass?"
"Hey, JD! Your twig went limp!" the wiseacre-running-for-may Jay chuckled, elbowing his partner Silent Bob, whom rolled his eyes.
"This just may take away from my failures in capturing the Phantom…" Arthur muttered quietly. "Compared to this tree I am huge and powerful."
"Can't you even tell the difference between a good tree from a bad tree?" Trillian chided.
"Oh, rats…" JD groaned miserably.
"You've been dumb before, JD, but this just takes the cake!" she said, glowering. JD held his head low, unwilling to look anyone in the eye. Cox dragged his hand through his hair as he watched JD slump out of everyone's sight. He had to say something to his mentee – Cox shook his head. Mentee? Where'd that come from?
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The crimson curtain drew open once more, revealing House sleeping peacefully in his four-poster bed. He snored rather loudly to boot. His grandfather clock stuck one AM. A bright blue light shined down from a star outside the room's window. It only grew brighter and brighter until it finally faded away, leaving behind the ghostly image of JD. He slowly sauntered toward House, as though gliding. "House…" he whispered in an attempt to wake the sleeping misanthrope. But House continued sleeping unabated. "House…" he called once more in a more urging tone. It proved fruitless. Growing annoyed, JD spoke in an average volume, "House." Nothing. JD reached into his cloak, pulled out a megaphone, and roared into it, "HOUSE!"
"ARGH!" The sound waves JD created had awoken House and, quite literally, sent him clinging to a bedpost. "Who? What? Where? Why? When!" After take many calming breaths, House noticed JD. "Oh. It's just a stinkin' ghost," he grumbled, rolling his eyes, which immediately shot open to the size of saucers. "GHOST!" He quickly snatched up his phone on the desk next to his bed and dialed a number. "Help! There's something strange in the neighborhood! It's something weird and it don't look good! That's why I'm calling you!" House paused for a moment for them to reply. Angry, he slammed the receiver back down on the base. "I ain't afraid of no ghost," he grumbled.
"Okay…" JD intoned slowly. "Hiya! The name's the Ghost of Christmas Past! Don't forget the 'the'. The 'the' makes me sound cooler and official." House frowned disapprovingly. "But you can just call me 'JD'!"
"Why? What's JD short for?" he asked, smirking subtly.
Sweat poured down JD's eyebrows as he turned with wide eyes to the waiting audience, all their eyes focused on him. He gulped. "Um, er, it's short for…'just delightful'!" JD answered, chortling uneasily.
"Right…. Anyway, so what'd you want?" House asked.
JD cleared his throat, and spoke in a more commanding tone, "I have come to take back to the past."
House raised an eyebrow. "To play the shitty games that suck ass? No thanks."
"This is YOUR past, House!" he snapped, taking House's hand. "Come on! Time is a-wasting!" JD dragged him out of the bed and toward the window that just then swung open.
"Are you out of your mind!" House protested, trying to escape JD's grip by dragging his heels across the wooden floor. "I can't do that, I'm not a ghost! I'll fall to my death!"
"Oh, quit being such a baby," JD said, hovering out of the room and window.
"NO!" he yelled, shutting his eyes tight. He felt his feet dragged from the last bit of footing he could find. House was sure he was going to fall but he didn't feel the sudden drop. He opened his eyes, seeing that JD was still holding on to his hand and keeping him afloat. "You drop me and I'm suing," he warned.
"Whatever floats your boat, Mr. House." JD rolled his eyes, pulling House across the air. Although he was being kidnapped by a specter and was rising hundreds of meters above the ground that would certainly hurt if he was dropped from such height, House felt quite comfortable gliding through the sky.
House closed his eyes, enjoying this feeling. When he opened them again he saw that they were no longer in the town, but rather next to a school building, where dozens of little children were playing games with each other in the snow. The school was familiar to House, almost like a lost memory. "What's the meaning of this, spirit?" he demanded.
"House, do you not recognize this school?" JD said. "How's about you take a look inside?" Cautious of JD's suggestion, House peeked through the building's window.
"House couldn't believe his eyes," Daffy narrated quietly. "There, inside the school, was him. The young Ebenezer House sitting behind a desk and studying while all the other students were outside playing."
House shook his head, feeling a sudden blast of nostalgia that this place had brought – along with the shock. "Look familiar now?" JD asked slyly.
"This…was my old boarding school," he whispered, placing his hand against the window's glass. "And that's…me."
"It's Christmas Eve, House," JD said. "Why is that you're inside while the others are getting ready for the holiday with their families?"
"Because Christmas was a sham," House answered bitterly. "I was always by myself and with no friends. With no one around I chose to study and read. I thought it was for the best. I was alone in this world…"
"But you weren't alone, House," JD reminded him as the school's door swung open.
House couldn't contain his gasp. His sister Elliot had opened the door, his supporting and loving sister. "Ebenezer!" she cried happily, taking her young brother into her arms.
The younger House was surprised by her sudden appearance. "Elliot? What are you doing here?"
"I've come to take you home, brother!" Elliot said, smiling warmly. "Our family is waiting for you!"
The young House was so happy, taking his sister's hand and leaving his loneliness behind. "Oh, I loved my sister," House whispered softly to JD. "I thought we would've have been together forever."
"But that didn't last, did it?" JD stated.
House allowed a few droplets of tears to drip from his eyes. "She died soon after. I had taken in her daughter Rika and raised her like my own."
"You love your niece, don't you?" he asked.
"Of course I do!" House said, offended by such a question.
"Then what of the times of late?" he asked.
House averted his eyes, regret forming in his heart. "I…" He couldn't answer as he closed his eyes.
"Come," JD said gently, taking House's hand again. "There is more to see." House opened his eyes and, once again, found himself at a new location with JD. This time standing in a dark, snow-covered street outside a shop, where lights within shined out a window over them. "Remember this place?"
"Do I ever!" House said, looking through the glass window inside. "This was where I worked my first job with my partner Cox, the Janitor's Workshop!" The insides were far more different from the barren and cold street outside – warm, bright, and full of life as the many workers did their jobs. "Ah, this brings back memories…. That Janitor was a crafty businessman, working us all to the bone!"
"Let us watch and see," JD suggested with a ghost of smile upon his face.
"My hardworking employees!" the Janitor, dressed fancily, called, gathering everyone's attention. "It's Christmas Eve! And you know what I want you to do tomorrow morn?" House expected hard work. "Sleep in and hang out with your families!" House was surprised as the Janitor laughed heartily. "Come on, come on!" he said, slamming shut everyone's books and throwing them to the corner. "It's Christmas Eve! We've worked enough today. Time to boogie!" With a snap of his fingers a group of workers picked up some musical instruments. "Play it, Sam!" he shouted with a grin.
Exciting and uplifting music filled the room as everyone pushed their desks away and began dancing in the center of the room. "Okay, maybe the Janitor wasn't as such a hard-ass as I thought," House said.
"Like you were with your own employee, Kronk?" JD asked. House knew that was coming, sighing remorsefully. "Oh, look, look! It's the younger you!"
House looked into the window, spotting a younger him walking with the Janitor. "Yo, Janitor," he said, holding up a receipt, "I've been doing a little investigating and I think you're spending way too much money on this party each year!"
The Janitor laughed as he brushed the paperwork aside. "Oh, screw it all, House! It's Christmas, therefore a time for generosity! Just stop working and have some fun!" He pushed the young House to a young woman in the middle of the dance floor. "Come on, you need to get out more and meet some people." He added in a whisper, "And you really need to get laid."
"Don't we all?" JD sighed pensively outside.
House ignored him, his eyes fixated on that young woman the Janitor pushed the younger him to. "Trillian," he whispered.
The slim Trillian, with long waves of hair, a full mouth, and ridiculously brown eyes turned to the young House. "Hi," she smiled.
"Um, er, hi," the young House stammered, dumbfounded by how pretty this woman is.
"So, would you like to dance?" she asked, smiling as she took his hand.
House gulped, nodding. "Er, yeah. Sure."
"You remember this meeting?" JD asked.
"Remember?" House said with a dry throat. "Of course I remember."
"I'm afraid there's one more past Christmas Eve I must show you," JD said, taking House's hand for one last time. "The one with Trillian three years from now."
House shut his eyes, shaking his head unwillingly. "No, please, no! Don't make me relive that Christmas again! Take me home!"
JD didn't comply, however, as House dropped to his knees on the floor of a little cottage. "I'm sorry, House," JD said softly.
House rose back to his feet, seeing another younger him sitting with his love Trillian. "When are we going to get married, Ebenezer?" she asked, a little frown on her face.
"I told you, as soon as we get enough money," the younger House said. "But business has just been looking bad lately…."
"You've been saying that for years," Trillian said.
"Just wait for me a little longer," he pleaded. "Some more money and everything will be all right."
Trillian sighed, "I don't think it will be." She stood up. "There will never be enough money for you, Ebenezer. Not now, not ever." She gently placed her hand on House's face. "I love you and I thought you loved me. But I'm afraid you love money more." Trillian's tears flowed from her eyes as she took off the wedding band around her ring finger. She took House's hand, placed the ring in it, and closed his hand. "Good-bye," she said, walking out of the home.
"Enough, spirit!" the present House moaned wretchedly, burying his face in his hands. "I can't take this anymore! Why do you enjoy torturing me so?"
"It was your greed that drove her away, House," JD reproached. "I am merely showing you the past you hold. You cannot blame me for all the things you have done."
"Leave me alone! Leave me alone!" House roared, attempting to punch the ghost. But he fell out of his bed on and the cold, hard floor of his room, crumpled in his bed sheets. He had returned back to his home in the present, but felt no better.
"House w-w-was left a-a-alone and remorseful, dwelling on his memories of past…" Porky said in a hush tone as the red curtains drew to a close once more.