HeyItsMJ: I do try. Glad to Entertain.
Sironblood1: Normally I would too but Aang is better than that. What better way to give a good guilt trip.
Arizony: Aww (I'm blushing.) "Your poor attempt." got this bad boy rolling. Give yourself mad props.
Airhead259: Of course it will be Kataang but Zuko and Katara have to suffer first. You can't abuse my Aang and not get wrath. Go Aang, Go Aang!
Air-Nomad: I know it's very Aangst worthy but it will get happier. That's a promise.
Shinobi Bender: Thank you for the Mai love. I know why is she so overlooked? Such marvelous posibilities with her. You so read my mind. (spooky)
They tell me what to do, I just write it. This will probably mark the end of the POV's but then the story will get underway. Thanks guys so much for reviewing. I feel like I'm doing something right.
Ok, I'll shut up now. Enjoy!
Aang strode out of the room leaving behind a hunched Zuko and a crying Katara. A million emotions zooming through him. 'How dare they, how could they? After how they acted. After how they behaved towards me and Mai?' Rage, disbelief, annoyance and hope all battled for dominance.
Hope won, of all of them he hated hope the most. It had been nearly impossible to go about his everyday business and not let the weight of what happened to their circle of friends crush him.
He had been a good person. He had followed the monk's beliefs to the letter and sacrificed everything to protect the world. When he came back after the battle everything had seemed to fall into place. His family was alive and he had not killed Ozai.
It was like the universe was finally paying him back when her lips touched his.
That kiss had scorched through his whole system filling him with a new energy. A desire not just for her but to protect their world and help rebuild it. He had thrown himself with enthusiasm into the meetings and treaties. He was a joy to have around and all the dignitaries, no matter how stuffy couldn't help but feel lighter with his positive attitude.
All that changed when his meetings took him farther and longer from her. At first it was a blessing. After all if he was going to be away longer she had to show him her love in more detail. Weeks on Appa were spent in contemplation of their last rendezvous. He would find the wind currents gaily spiraling clouds as he thought of those stolen moments in every room in the palace.
The war room had been his most favorite. He remembered on one particular occasion, they had begun with little stolen looks as the dignitaries were leaving. She claimed to have left something behind and motioned to Aang to help her with what ever it was. He saw through her little charade, after all he wasn't the avatar for nothing.
After several breathless kisses, they had ended on the table near Zuko's chair. A fact that had Aang blush every time he looked at the perplexed royal. Her hands were often more adventurous than his. Something she teasingly attributed to his chaste upbringing.
In actuality he didn't think making love to her in the war room would help their campaign to get rooms closer to each other. Zuko complained often enough that their displays of affection were an embarrassment to all four nations. Still just as they had reached a point of no return, Katara had turned to him. "Do you think we'll always be like this."
"I certainly hope so." he grinned.
Aang saw now what he had missed then. She was restless or scared or maybe bored of him. He was only thirteen and she was fifteen. She was approaching marrying age and he was still going through the effects of puberty. It never occurred to him that leaving her in Zuko's care had been the equivalent of Momo guarding moon peaches.
He sighed at his naiveté. Maybe he deserved to lose her for being so negligent. His last trip took him to the outskirts of the Southern Water Tribe. He had taken the opportunity to ask Master Pahku what it had been like to see Gran-Gran after all those years. His old master had told him it was wonderful and heartbreaking. He had lost so much time to his stupid pride and only now saw how precious his wife was to him.
Aang had resolved then and there to return to Katara and ask for her hand. If her father and brother consented, which they did. He would promise himself to her and hope she would do the same. During his travels he failed to see that she no longer welcomed him as joyously. That their kisses became more brief.
Of course now he knew it was because she had been hiding her growing affection for Zuko. That she had the young firebender at her beck and call and no longer needed his skinny arms to hold her at night. Her letters became staccato renditions of the progress of the fire nation and each one mentioned Zuko a little more. Aang recognized the danger and fled in the middle of a negotiation but by the time he got there it was too late.
She welcomed him home, her home. With Zuko right beside her. The guilt ridden look on his former teacher's face sent him reeling. It had taken all the control he had learned not to let the Avatar State do its will. She had held out her hands palms up as if to implore him to be happy for her but he was in no mood to listen.
The betrothal beads he had lovingly carved turned to dust in his hand. He felt the dust slide through his fingers, he flung what remained at them. How appropriate the action had been. Katara had slipped through his fingers too.
Zuko had appealed to his better self but the brilliant flash of light in his eyes made him back up, nobly protecting his accomplice. Aang snorted in disgust as Katara pulled from Zuko's protection.
Any peace he had obtained was extinguished but he did not leave. He had his duty and he would be unworthy of Gyatso if he forsaked it for her. She who had brought him to life only to cut him down. He stiffly informed the Firelord that he would attend the meeting but he would feel more comfortable rooming with Appa.
He bowed to Katara apologizing for his outburst and led his flying bison out of courtyard and into the stables where he spent the rest of the night. He didn't make a sound and for the first time in his life he wished he had been at the temple and been massacred along with his people. It would have been kinder.
Aang found that Appa was an excellent body to cry on and Momo reminded him that life went on regardless of his personal sorrows. His optimism shaken but not broken resolved to form a new life without Katara. He sought out Mai and was pleased to see that she too had withstood her heartbreak.
In that moment they became survivors and lifelong friends. Aang did his job and several days later took Mai away from the Fire Nation. He grinned widely at the look on Zuko's face when Mai took his arm and alighted onto Appa. Katara had not been there but he would have laid down good coins to have heard her reaction.
That had been one year ago to the day and the pain felt as intense as before. He hated them for bringing all this out again. He had managed to come to a grudging understanding and now because they felt guilty, they wanted to bring back out every disturbing moment back to assuage any honor they had left.
Aang stopped his pacing. He balanced on the balcony railing and stared out into the sky. He wished he had someone to talk to. His mind would have instantly gone to Katara but he surprised himself when Mai's quiet face came to mind. He would go see her and maybe together they could come to a solution as to how they should deal with their ex-lovers.
He snapped open his glider but a solemn figure in the garden caught his eye. His heart gave a twist and he knew instantly that only Katara had that effect on the poor organ. He agilely jumped down and landed several feet behind her.
She had not heard him but then she looked preoccupied. Secretly he hoped that today's little demonstration had shown her that she couldn't snap her fingers and bring him running anymore.
"Katara." he called out softly. She looked up at him. He nearly lost his equilibrium when she turned those dark eyes on him. 'Her eyes had never been dark.' Apparently I'm not the only one who's been changed. He was a bit shocked to see her scan him in such a proprietary manner. It also angered him, she had lost the right to look at him like that a long time ago and he wasn't going to allow her to think she could apologize and all would be forgiven.
It had been difficult enough to stomach Zuko's hug earlier. The idea that those same arms had held the woman he had wanted to marry almost made him sick. Aang would have flung them off him but he had missed Sifu hotman. That was perhaps the worst part of the whole situation. Zuko had been the older brother he always wanted. It was doubly hard. He had lost so much family already.
He shifted his gaze back to Katara. "Aang. I'm so happy that---"
He cut her off, he had to or he'd never make it out of here intact. He told her he was leaving and it dawned on him that maybe she was regretting whatever had transpired between her and Zuko.
Her impassioned speech confirmed it. He tried not to listen, to not hope. Her touch electrified him and he finally spoke his piece. He shouted out everything he had bottled up and carried with him. He felt so drained afterwards not relieved in the slightest. Her whisper was caught between them and he almost considered it but the image of Mai's tear stained face looking up at him for support blazed before him.
No, he couldn't go down this road again. He hadn't lied all those years ago, forgiving was hard. "I don't think I can stand you loving me anymore," he replied.
They stood like that for what seemed forever but in reality it was only a few seconds before she said. "Take me to the South Pole and you'll never have to see me again."
He gripped his staff tighter and reluctantly nodded. "Be ready by tomorrow. I leave at first light. With or without you."
Aang spent the rest of the night agonizing over the coming trip. Tomorrow he would be with Katara for an extended period of time and he didn't know how he was to keep her at a distance.
"Why is my life always so damn difficult." He shouted. Aang knew falling to her charms was embarrassingly easy but trusting her was a completely different proposition.