Shepard sat in the chair next to Joker's empty one in the cockpit. She took deep breaths, trying to compose herself. It was heart-wrenching to start a relationship she'd longed for for so many months, then to separate. She shook her head and tried to keep things in perspective. They could maintain a long distance relationship, and eventually be reunited. If things didn't work out, well, then they weren't meant to be. Joker sitting in his chair next to her caught her attention and he looked over at her, quiet.
She smiled, "I'm not used to being this emotional on-duty."
"I think you're allowed, since you just single-handedly just saved the galaxy."
"Not so single-handedly."
He turned to his console and started pushing buttons, "Well, duh, you had the best pilot in the Alliance too."
She laughed, then wiped her eyes dry.
He looked over at her, "Sooo, you and Garrus, huh?"
She grinned, "Yea. Wish I'd told him sooner."
"To be honest, I thought you were with Kaidan."
She shook her head, "No, he was interested in me, but I never felt that way about him, and told him so. Anything else was just ship gossip."
"Gotcha. I can see you and Garrus together. You guys would be good for each other."
"Thanks. I think so. I wish he could have stayed on board, though."
"You know how the Alliance is. They couldn't wait to get their grubby paws back on the Normandy." He could sense her hurt, and knew how much she leaned on Garrus' support. "Long-distance relationships work. Not that I would know from personal experience, but I've seen it. You ah, not concerned about the interspecies differences?"
She absentmindedly ran her hand through her hair, "Not really. It's been done before. I've done some research on it."
He leaned forward, "Really? Mind sending me some of that research my way? Better yet, I can look some up and send some to you."
"Yeah, no thanks. I can only imagine what you could find on the extranet."
He held his hands up in protest, "What, what? It could be instructional, with diagrams and everything. I've got more free time on my hands now, I could find some helpful stuff."
"Ugh, I've heard enough. Oh – and don't try putting bugs in my cabin. I check that every night."
"Who, me? I'm really hurt Shepard that you would think that about me."
She shook her head and grinned, "Well, I suppose you'd better set us a course. Hackett sent us coordinates." She stood up.
"Stamping out geth our new mission?" he looked at her inquiringly.
"For now. Of course we'll still be checking out reapers on the side. They can't stop us from doing that."
"True. Found Hackett's message. Setting coordinates. Ready to go?"
She sighed, "Ready."
The next week she focused on their mission of systematically going through planetary systems taking out remaining geth. There was more than she anticipated. The husks seemed to be gone, though, disappeared. "Maybe that's a good sign," she told Kaidan. They worked together on most missions, with the rest of her usual team gone, she counted on him more. He was respectful and professional, and they started to form a friendship again that wasn't as awkward, and she was glad for that.
Back in her quarters, she switched on the new vid screen Garrus had bought her and messaged him. She'd figured out key times he was likely to be back in his quarters. Sure enough, his face flickered across the screen. She sat on her bed and pulled her knees up underneath her.
"Hey, how was today?" he asked her.
"Mm, good. It's a bit boring, I admit."
He laughed, "You could use a little boring these days."
"I suppose. Oh – I have good news! We're coming to the Citadel next week. We're only there for 6 hours, but after I stock up on supplies, I can come see you."
"Fantastic. I have training in the morning, but you can come by in the afternoon and I'll show you around. Then we can go out to eat – have that date I promised you."
She beamed, "I can't wait."
"So – you doing your shoulder exercises?" he pointed at her.
She sighed, "Of course, boss. Twice a day. Doctor says I don't need further surgery."
"Good."
"What about you? How was training today?"
"Tough, as it should be. I'm sore. Wish you could help me work it out."
She blushed, "I would love to."
"You know, I've been doing some more research."
"Oh, yeah?"
"Yeah, it ah, became an embarrassing conversation with my C.O. actually."
She sat up, "What do you mean?"
"Well, they monitor communications intermittently, just to make sure, you know. No security leaks, things of that nature."
She nodded, "Right."
He reached up and rubbed the back of his neck, "My internet searches were questioned as extranet porn. Not a serious offense, but frowned upon."
She put her hand over her face, "Oh god."
He chuckled, "Yea, so I explained to him how my girlfriend was human, and this was personal research. He calmed down after that. Nothing to worry about."
"That's pretty funny actually. I hope the research you found was worth it."
"Oh, definitely. I'm just waiting for when you get a few days shore leave and we can try it out."
She felt a shiver down her back. "Me too."
They talked a bit more, then she shut off the vid screen. The next week went pretty much the same routine, she was able to talk to Garrus most every night after mundane missions taking out pockets of geth. They made their way back to the Citadel for the short shore leave, and Shepard eagerly disembarked, quickly going around and ordering the supplies she needed. Her omni-tool lit up and she messaged Garrus back. He met her by a taxi stand, still looking down at his omni-tool when she ran up and surprised him with a hug.
"Jane!" he picked her up and squeezed her, like he had that day they defeated Saren and she'd emerged from the wreckage.
"Oh, Garrus! I'm so glad to see you!" she looked up at him, then gave him an even harder hug.
He breathed in her scent, not realizing how much he really had missed her until she was here with him now. They continued to embrace, then he finally pulled back and held her arms, looking down at her. "We can take a taxi back to the training headquarters. I'll show you around, and then we can go eat. I found a great place that serves amino and dextro foods."
"Wonderful." She got in the taxi and they took a short ride to the training center.
"I've been meaning to ask you why the Training Center is here on the Citadel, considering it's a Turian run facility."
"They wanted to be under the scrutiny of the Council. Otherwise, if it was on Palaven, it would undoubtedly turn into a Turian military run operation. This way they can bring in Asari teachers as well. The Asari have one on the Citadel too. Pretty soon I suppose there will be a human one. Maybe you could be the C.O. of that."
She smirked, "Head-mistress of a school? I don't see that for myself."
"No? Then what are your retirement plans then, Spectre?"
"Oh, that's so far away, I can't even imagine."
"Hmm. Maybe you'll move to Palaven as ambassador and raise adopted Turian babies."
She raised her eyebrows and looked at him, "Is that the plan, Vakarian?"
"It's my plan."
"Hm. Maybe you could move to Citadel as instructor of the Spectre training program and help your Councilman wife raise adopted human and Turian children."
"That sounds nice too." He reached out for her hand and kissed it.
She could feel her heart swelling up with his love and adoration. She had held back so much, for so long. She honestly would never have even considered a relationship if it hadn't been for how her own mortality frightening her past her deeper fears on the mission to get Saren. Once she became serious about her Alliance career, she'd put all that aside, not wanting to sacrifice her heart with the demands of a job. Yet, here she was, totally embracing it. Garrus had changed all that.
They arrived at the Turian Spectre training center with Garrus getting her past security.
"It's not a problem, me being here?"
"You're a Spectre. You're allowed here." He lead her through the lobby of the facility and down towards the barracks. She was mostly unrecognized through the hallways, but one of Garrus' instructors passed them in the hallway and stopped them.
"Commander Shepard! It's an honor to have such an esteemed Spectre here. Are you coming to lecture our new recruits?" she said excitedly.
Shepard shook her head, "No, I'm not here in an official capacity."
"Oh, that's a shame," she hurriedly held her hand out, "I'm Sarice, one of Trainee Vakarian's instructors. I have to say, he's one of the best we've ever had. Well, being on your team certainly taught him a lot, I'm sure. You know, we tried recruiting him years ago, but he went to C-sec instead. Happy to have him on board at last." She beamed at them.
"I am humbled by your praise," Garrus gave her a slight bow.
She waived her hand at him, "Certainly earned. You here for a tour, then?"
"Something like that. Garrus is showing me around a bit, then we're going to get something to eat. I'm only here for a few hours."
"I see," she nodded, noticing them holding hands. "Well, I won't hold you up any longer. I'm pleased to meet you, and you're welcome to come any time."
As she rushed past them, Shepard looked up at Garrus, "She's not what I would expect in an instructor."
"You've only been exposed to Turians in the military, Jane. We're a far more personable race than that represents."
Soon they arrived at his quarters that he shared with another recruit. As they entered, his roommate stood up from the couch and greeted Shepard, shaking her hand.
"Nice to meet you, I'm Marek."
Shepard smiled and shook his hand back. "So, this is where you guys hang out, huh?"
They laughed, "Not much time to hang out," Marek said. "Besides, any spare time he has is spent on the internet or talking to you."
Shepard blushed.
"I was on my way out to the gym, you guys can have the place to yourselves," Marek started.
Garrus stopped him, "No, we're just taking a quick look around, then going out to eat. She's got to get back on the Normandy tonight."
He showed her around their barracks, but it was much more of an apartment than that. They each had their own rooms, joined by a living / kitchen area. "Next time you come, I'll have some amino food for you, and we can stay here."
Shepard nodded. It was strange, seeing Garrus a student, a trainee, like basic training. He was really taking it seriously. It had been different for her becoming a Spectre. As the first human, there was no training school, no protocol. It just happened. She looked around and saw photos of her and Garrus together peppered around his room. She picked one up, "Where did you get this? I want a copy."
"Tali gave that to me. All those pictures she took preparing to leave back to the Migrant Fleet. I'll send you copies."
"Good. I'd love to have these to look at in my quarters." She smiled brightly at him.
"Let's go. I'll show you around the facilities, then we'll go out."
She was impressed by the equipment, the training rooms. The combat sims were better than anything she'd seen through the Alliance. They walked outside the facility and down the street.
"There are other parts of the facility, training in different languages, species, strategy, espionage."
"They work you hard. It's an intensive schedule." She said admiringly.
"It should be. Only 2 out of every 10 candidates make it through the first 6 months. If you make it past that, you join up with another Spectre for 4 – 8 months."
"It was totally different for me."
"Yes, they were going to skip the initial training period since I was with you on the Normandy, but I didn't want any special treatment. Here we are."
She looked up and they were in front of a restaurant.
"I go here a lot. I thought you might like it."
They sat at a table and ordered. Garrus grabbed her hand and held it across the table. He lightly rubbed her fingers.
"I'm so proud of you, Garrus. I had no idea how involved this was. You're going to make a great Spectre."
"And then we can go out on missions together, right?"
"It's a plan."
"You're my motivation, Jane. I feel like I have a purpose, a future to look forward to for the first time. It's like I've got new life breathed into me."
She squeezed his hand, "I'm so glad you feel that way. It's like a dream. I had such a crush on you for so long, I never thought you might return my feelings. I'm so happy. The only thing that will make it better is when we can finally be together again. It's hard, I'm not going to lie."
"I know. I'm so busy, I think that's the only thing that keeps me from dwelling on it."
They finished their meal, and before they knew it, it was time for her to get back to the ship.
Outside the taxi stand, she held on to Garrus and leaned up and kissed him. He held her tightly and ran his fingers through her hair.
"You know, I like this trainee uniform on you. It's handsome."
He laughed, "Maybe I'll keep it and wear it for you on special occasions."
"Mmm, sounds nice," she sighed.
He broached the topic of work, one they had been avoiding all night. "So where are you off to next?"
"The Terminus systems. A couple of ships have gone missing out there. Must be a larger pocket of geth we need to get to."
"Be careful. You don't have your best sniper with you."
She smiled weakly, "I know. We did pick up a couple more Alliance soldiers to go out on missions. Can't always be just me and Kaidan."
"How are things going with him?" he asked.
She shrugged, "Better. He backed off, he's professional and we've developed a respectful friendship. He's really a decent guy, he just fell in love with the wrong woman. He'll find the right one someday."
"Shame, I always felt Ashley would be good for him." Garrus regretted bringing her up. To his relief, Shepard laughed.
"She would have been way too much for him to handle. He needs a meek, submissive woman."
"That's definitely not you."
"No, definitely not." She leaned against his chest, "but the right one for you, right?"
"Definitely yes."
Her omni-tool went off, letting her know she had 10 minutes to get back on the ship. "Well, I'd better go." She looked down.
"Hey, let's get a picture together. I'll send it to you along with the other ones in my quarters."
"Okay, great idea." She leaned against him, and he held up his omni tool, taking several images of them together.
"Our first official date." He pushed a few buttons, "Just sent it to you."
"Great, I'll put it in my quarters tonight."
She cleared her throat, she knew she needed to go, but didn't want to. Seeing him again made the pain of his absence more acute. She reached up for his lapels, "I'm putting in for some shore leave in a month. I'll have a few days accrued by then."
He reached up and took her hands in his, "Let me know when, and I'll get some time off from here as well, at least half days, like today."
She nodded. She looked up at him and gave him one last lingering kiss. He reveled in her taste, it made him long for more.
"Okay, Spectre. You can't set a bad example by being late."
"Yea, I know. Garrus?"
"Yes?"
She locked eyes with him, "I love you."
"Oh Jane, I love you too."
She smiled and walked away, picking up the pace as she walked around the corner.