Deeks can feel her eyes gazing at him longingly but he didn't turn. He chose to lift his head towards the dark starry night, eyeing the vast space above them with a stoic face. When he left his room moments ago, he decided to walk along the shore for a while hoping to find the sleepiness that seemed so scarce that night. A woman in a yellow dress caught his eyes immediately. Deeks heard her laughter as she was trying to stand up only to be pulled back in the shallow water by the waves. With a shake of his head, he strode headed towards her and helped her up. He didn't smell alcohol from Kensi so he knew she wasn't drunk but was acting like one.

He knew he should have left when she asked him to stay. It was a dangerous time for him, spending this moment with her no matter how short it may be. But he couldn't. The illogical part of him, the one who wouldn't want to let go, desired to spend what time he has left with her. Deeks spent 6 months in various undercover assignments trying not to count the days that he will see Kensi again knowing it will be the last time he will witness her smiles, the thing he loved the most in her. Disregarding his rational side, he plopped down next to her and they have been silent since then, content with just hearing each other breathing.

"Do you remember the first time we met?"

Kensi's soft voice made him glance at her. She was smiling at him, expecting him to answer.

"It happened 20 years ago." His reply. Images of her who was 6 year old then came to his mind. "You were wearing the same color dress. I instantly thought you were a princess like Beauty from Beauty and the Beast." He said followed by a chuckle.

"So you're the Beast to my Beauty then?" She teased before she can comprehend what her words will bring to him.

"I wished."

Deeks saw her stand up hastily, remorse was present in her face. "I'm sorry." He heard her say.

He followed her just as quickly, stopping on her front and placing his hands on her shoulders. "Don't. Stop it, Kensi." He reached for her cheek, turning her face for him to see. "You don't need to apologize. There's nothing to be sorry for. I made my decision, you made yours. We have to a-accept it and be happy about it." He said with pretend conviction, more for his own sake than to hers.

"Must we, Deeks?" Kensi asked him, her tears were beginning to fall down her face. "When Jack asked me to be his girlfriend and you told me he cares for me and I deserve him for he will never hurt me, I trusted you. Your words, they meant everything to me up to now. So tell me please, must we accept what's going on now and be happy with it? Is this how everything is supposed to be? Tell me, Deeks. Please."

Deeks choked on his words, he didn't know what to say to the woman crying in front of him. Her eyes were pleading to him and he can feel his knees starting to weaken.

"Because if everything is how it supposed to be, why am I hurting so badly? Why does my heart won't stop aching for you? Tell me please, I want to know." She added.

He didn't know why he did it. Maybe it was her tears, her begging voice or how she was showing him her feelings but Deeks wound one arm around his waist and pulled her close to him while the other was on the back of her head, tilting it so he can kiss her.

He sensed Kensi's surprise when his lips landed on hers but it didn't take long, a second later Deeks can feel her starting to respond to his assault. She began kissing him back with the same passion and need as he does. She wrapped her arms around his neck, settling her hands on his nape as she pressed herself against his more. Years of pent up love for each other, they kissed with eagerness and hunger that only the two of them can understand. The need to breath pulled their faces apart but not their hold. Forehead to forehead, they took a much needed air.

Kensi felt him moved and suddenly she felt cold and empty. When she opened her eyes, she panicked to see Deeks, his back already on her, walking away from her.

"Deeks!" She called his name but he never looked back. "Deeks!"

Kensi followed him with hasty steps, almost tripping down just to reach him. She caught his arm and pulled him to stop. "Deeks."

"I'm sorry Kensi. That should have never happened, I don't know what go into me. I'm sorry."

She shook her head in disbelief. "After all this time you still can't find a way to fight for me." Her voice was filled with pain.

"You don't understand."

"Make me understand, Deeks! Why? Why kiss me only to tell me you're sorry it happened?"

"I can't."

"You love me."

"I do."

"Why can't you be with me?"

Deeks was avoiding her stare and her shoulders fell in defeat when he didn't answer.

"Your love, it isn't enough to be with me." She tried concluding but was having a hard time comprehending his action. She knew he loved her, she felt it in his hold, in his kiss. But for some reason he didn't want to be with her.

"I'm sorry, Kensi." His only whisper as he turned his back on her once more and began striding back to the hotel leaving Kensi alone crying while whispering his name.

"Deeks..."

"Kensi."

"J-Jack?"

She wiped her tears away when she heard a knock on the door followed by Jack's soft voice from the outside. She glanced at the clock on the nightstand and saw that it was already past midnight. Willing herself up, Kensi headed to the closed door and opened it for him.

"I-I need to see you." He said as soon as he saw her, not waiting for her question.

"How about the tradition?" She asked curiously though she no longer care about that.

Jack gave him a small yet nervous smile. "Don't worry we're not breaking any tradition, Kensi."

She wanted him to explain his reply but she no longer have the energy to ask him. She was tired and numb. Ever since she got back to her room after being left by Deeks on the beach, Kensi spent the entire time on her bed weeping. She saw him studying her appearance, noticing how terrible she looked with her eyes all red and swollen but he didn't mention and she didn't care. She was sure he knew there was something with her. She even expected him to pry but was surprised that he didn't.

Jack entered her room and sat on the edge of the bed while she remained standing, her back on the closed door, eyes on her fiancé.

Kensi was staring at him, taking in how sad he seemed to be. Nervousness starting to creep in her. When he patted the space next to him, she joined him without question but hesitantly.

"Jack?"

He took her hands with his and caught her eyes. "I-I love you, Kensi. I want you to remember that. Nothing and no one can change that." He began. "I am not the man you think I am. You always believe that I am someone who would do no harm but you're wrong. I made mistakes Kensi and it brought you so much pain."

"W-What are you saying?"

Kensi felt his grip tightened on her.

"I know. I know your feelings for him. I know how much you love him but I chose to ignore it."

Kensi felt her heart stopped a beat. He knew? For years, he knew.

"I know how he feels about you, how much he loves you but I made him not to tell you about it. All because I wanted you to be mine."

She didn't know what to do with what she heard. "J-Jack..."

"When you agreed to be my girlfriend, I promised to love you with everything I have, to wait until you've forgotten your feelings for him, to make you happy because that's what he asked of me. I know I failed the last two because no matter how long it passed, you're still in love with Deeks, because despite how you pretend to be happy, I know you never were. But I still held on to my love for you, thinking I'm giving it my all. But I was wrong. I never loved you with my everything..."

Kensi saw how he was trying to hold back his tears and a part of her wanted feel sorry for him.

"Because if I have truly loved you with my all, I wouldn't have waited up to this moment to let you go. I shouldn't have ignore the truth that I am not the man for you and never will be. I'm sorry, Kensi. For everything. For tricking you into being with me. For asking Deeks to give you up. For being selfish."

Kensi's eyes were wide in shock. He asked Deeks to give me up?

Jack knelt down before her, his hold never leaving hers as tears escaped his eyes.

"I-I wanted to hate you." She whispered. "But I can't. I love you, Jack."

Jack nodded. "I know. I, for once, never doubted your love for me but we both know it's not enough. It will never be enough because you're not in love with me."

She can feel her tears wetting her face. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I can't be the woman for you, Jack. I tried. I want you to know that I tried my hardest."

"I know, Kensi. I know."

"I would have marry you but it'll be wrong. Like my decision to be with you." She took a deep breath before continuing. "I have wanted Deeks for so long I can remember but never found the courage to tell him that because I was afraid. Scared of him hurting me. When you told me you like me and Deeks convinced me that you care for me, I agreed to be your girlfriend. Not because I like you the same but because with you, I don't need to be afraid. Because you are the only constant thing in my life. I'm sorry if I entered our relationship for all the wrong reasons. You're not the only one who was selfish, Jack." She admitted. For the first time, Kensi acknowledged her mistakes.

"I love you, Kensi and this time I can say that I have loved you with everything I have. I love you enough to let you go and be with Deeks. You are meant to be together in the first place. I'm sorry I stood in your way. I'm sorry it took me this long to let you go." He slowly pulled himself up and kissed her forehead.

Kensi closed her eyes and reveled on his gesture.

"I want you to know that you made me happy, Kensi. In the ten years of our relationship I have been the happiest. But it's about time I stop thinking only about myself. I love you, don't forget it." He whispered in her hair.

Kensi watched him as he walked through the door. With his shoulders shaking, she can tell he was crying and she can only cry with him.