Warning some...implications.

Nothing graphic at all.

Chapter 9

The Dagger

It didn't take long to lose the guards and escape the castle, because once you know one castle, you know them all. And Emma knew how to escape a castle, especially one crawling with her others guards, it was like child's play. After growing up escaping from the same nameless guards again and again, she learned their patterns well, she knew when to poof and when to make herself known. She made sure that every guard thought they were right on her heels. It would have been impossible to do with Killian and Henry in tow, but hopefully they had found their own way out.

"Hello dearie, it's good to finally meet you."

Emma sighed, turning towards the damn imp. He sat waiting for her, casually like he had expected her. There was even a cup of tea in his hand. A part of her figured he did, that he had predicted her escape plot. He was the damn sorcerer, and just like her, predicting the future was a part of the bargain.

The Sorcerer and the Dark One, legend had it that they were two sides of the same coin, whatever the hell that meant.

"Rumpelstitlskin." She growled, gathering her magic up, ready to fight.

"You and I both know that's not going to work." He said sadistically. "So why don't you relax before you hurt yourself."

She didn't.

"Or perhaps your deckhand hmm? I suppose that's the real reason you were so upset Dark One. He didn't tell you that your out of control magic burned him."

She let a wordless shout, blasting dark magic at his feet. How dare he mention Killian, he didn't care for Killian, that shot was just to hurt her, make her remember what she had done.

The way she had thrown him aside when his damn moral compass was making things difficult, the way he had wrenched his hand away from her when her dark magic had spiked, almost as if he had been burned.

Almost, yeah right. She had burned him. She had hurt the man she was falling for.

"Let me pass." She growled, trying to keep the black magic from appearing, trying to keep herself level.

"And leave my questions unsatisfied? No thank you." He replied closing the distance in an instant, grabbing her wrist and lowering it in his iron like grip.

"Get your hands off of me." She growled. She didn't want his hands anywhere near her. She didn't want anyone touching her.

They'd just get burned. Not that she cared about him. Emma would love to send him tumbling, body ablaze, hearing his scream of-

Emma shook her head. That couldn't happen, Killian didn't like it when she killed people. It was bad form or something.

"You asked me to keep out of your business, and your business just happens to cross into my business when you ruin my son's party. I'd like to know why, why these prisoners are so important to you that you'd risk my wrath." He asked.

"They are my friends." She said simply. "A girl's got to protect her friends." She said with a seductive wink.

It made the man scowl but release his grip. "A friend? The Dark One has no friends." He scoffed.

She didn't reply, forcing her way past him. He was right after all.

"But you're not a usual Dark One are you?" He questioned quietly, appearing in front of her, waving a hand over her face. She pushed him away, but knew it was useless, he had gotten a read on her and more importantly, her magic.

"Ah yes, it makes sense now. Why you haven't been slaughtering villages since your escape. That's quite the bold move you made isn't it?" He laughed. "Getting rid of the dagger as you did."

Emma froze. Just hearing the word, made her darkness spike, remembering its secret craving, it's need to be with its other half, she could barely hear the whispers in the back of her mind, calling, calling to her. It wanted her-

No. She wouldn't listen, she didn't want to know, didn't want to see.

"Did you think getting rid of the darkness would be that easy? Even while you use its dark magic? Did you really think you could just throw it away? As if the power was nothing?" He demanded. She stared him down. He was obviously no stranger to the allure of power, but he didn't understand, he didn't understand the darkness.

He was a creature of the light, what the hell did he know about darkness?

"You don't know what you're talking about." She said simply. "You with your damn light magic, you have no idea what it's like to have the darkness nipping at you heel your every step!" She hissed. "The constant battle to do the right thing while every fiber of your being not to!"

Kill him. Kill him!

"So you what? You may not wish to harm people, but once someone gets the dagger, it won't really be your choice will it?"

Emma just laughed. "That's the point! No one knows where it is, not even me. I don't hear it calling to me, I don't see him telling me who I am anymore. Everyone I love is safe from me!"

Kill them all, make them suffer, make them burn. Burn. Burn.

The Sorcerer smiled, leaning in, almost as if he could hear her too. Almost as if he knew that the angrier she got, the louder the voices were shouting in her ear. "It's not helping is it? Not completely? And you and I both know that this loophole you've found has a weakness, a side effect if you will."

Emma rolled her eyes. "Of course I know. It's my life, my curse." She spat back. "So what are you going to do? Threaten to tell my dear ol' mother? She already knows, why do you think she keeps wanting to capture me? My friends? Killing the men in my life?" She taunted. "Because she wants me to tell her where I hid it. She wants to find it, undo the process and control me yet again." She snapped.

He stayed silent.

"So if you excuse me, my friend and my nephew are waiting for me."

He stopped her once more.

"Emma, you know that it isn't a permanent solution right? You know you're going to have to deal with it soon." He warned, she could hear the sincerity in his voice.

"I've been dealing with it every day for my entire life." She responded. "The darkness is not the enemy in moderation." She added.

"Do you want to get rid of it Emma?" He asked. "I know of a way, if you truly want to."

Emma didn't need to think on it. She already knew her answer. Emma had known her answer for years. She knew what it felt like for the magic to be suppressed, to be helpless, to be weak. She didn't want that. Taking out the darkness may solve a few of her problems, but it didn't stop her mother from coming after her. It didn't stop her son from being threatened, maybe not for being the Dark Ones son, but for being the bastard prince of Misthaven. It didn't stop her sailor from being threatened

"The darkness is mine. It's both my crutch and my burden. It belongs to me. But I will use it, wield it to protect the people I love, even from you. It helps me do what I have to do to get things done. So tell me, are you going to stand in my way? Will you honor our agreement or will we have to see which one of us with our immortal magic reigns supreme?"

He nodded. "I will stay out of your way as long as you stay out of mine. Just a word of warning, Miss Swan? No matter how much you try, power can't always protect the people you love." She swallowed thickly.

"Is that a threat?" The man shakes his head.

"It's a warning, from one Immortal soul who has lost everything one before and hopes you don't follow in my footsteps."

With that, the man waved his hand and disappeared in a yellow cloud.

"Damn spinner." She cursed, continuing forward on the search for her boys, praying that they are alright, and condemning any who had made them otherwise.

X

She arrived in the nearby town they had been staying at, their safe place. There were no royal guards, but Emma knew it was only a matter of time. She walked into the tavern, putting some of her more casual dresses on rather than the red satin ball gown.

But oh had she loved the way Killian's face flushed when he saw it.

"Has my husband and nephew returned?" She asked the man and woman running the tavern. They'd been staying there for the last couple of days, enjoying a moment of peace before everything went to hell. It had all gone to hell.

"Yes miss, just under an hour ago, your husband was comforting that poor boy."

Comforting? She felt instantly terrified, rushing upstairs in a furry. She could hear it all the way down the hall, hopeless sobbing.

"Shhh. It'll be alright Henry, go ahead and cry lad, cry your eyes out, no one will think you any less." Killian said softly. It was Henry crying, her poor little thief. She lingered in the hall, opening the door slowly, seeing Henry gripping Killian's dress coat tightly, as his face was pressed against his chest, Killian was holding him just as tightly, moving his hand on his back in slow circles. "It'll be ok lad. When your mum gets here, she'll make it better alright?"

Henry let out a wordless sob.

"I know. I know. A broken heart is a terrible thing, but it gets better lad, I promise." He answered.

A broken heart?

"I just met her Killian, but I…I I'm so scared that something might have happened to her."

Her, the girl at the dance, the princess of Camelot. Emma realized. She started to wonder what happened after she parted, she had abandoned her boys and something dreadful had happened.

"You fell hard lad, fell hard for an incredible young lady, I knew that the instant I saw you with her." Killian admitted as Henry loosened his grip on him. "When we find her, when not if lad, you better be prepared to treat her right, it's not all about pillaging and plunder you know." He said cheekily, making her son laugh at those words, words he had only said a few days ago.

She found herself laughing as well, drawing Killian's eyes to her. He smiled wide before looking between her and Henry.

"Swan."Killian said, seeing her. He looked relieved that she was there. Henry turned towards her, eyes red and blotchy from crying, he was still shaking. She went over and sat on his other side. "Would you like me to leave you two alone?" He asked gently.

"No. Mom, Killian can stay; can-can he tell you what happened? I don't think I can." The boy admitted. She nodded as her boy, her sweet little boy, crawled closer to her, curling up at her side. She embraced him, kissing him on the top of his head.

Killian began gently telling her what happened, still soothing the boy with his hand on his back. He explained how Henry's friend had got him out of the castle, got them horses, before being shot in the leg by an arrow. She gasped at that, at the thought of such a brave courageous hero saving their lives, strangers, at the expense of her own, Emma knew she couldn't ever do that, she wasn't a savior.

By the end of the story, Henry was so exhausted that he fell asleep leaning against her. She pressed a kiss to his head, transforming his dress clothes into night attire, tucking him into bed. She led Killian out of the room, closing the door before grabbing a hold of him tightly, refusing to let go of him.

He wrapped his arms around her instantly. "Are you alright love?" He asked softly.

"I'm ok. How about you? Did they hurt you? Tell me the truth."

He parted slightly, but they didn't leave each other's space.

"Not even a scratch." He vowed, pointing to the chut shirt. "My apparel however has suffered a nasty flesh wound." He snickered. How about you?"

Emma just rolled her eyes. "I'm the Dark One silly. They can't hurt me." She insisted, but he gave her a knowing smile. He knew something was amiss with that line, but thankfully he didn't voice it. She took his hand, leading him back to his room. They were in need of a particularly unpleasant conversation.

"Undress pirate." She ordered as he sat on the bed, Emma sitting behind him, removing the jacket. He sighed as he did so.

"That's not a very proper thing for a princess to be asking." He deflected.

"I don't care. I need to see it." She said simply. He pulled up the sleeve of the dress coat, holding out his left hand to her. Sure enough, around his left wrist and palm, there were bright red burns on his skin, not looking healed despite having days.

"Oh god, Killian, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to do that I-" He shook his head.

"I know that love. I know. You were scared and angry. I understand." Emma placed her hand over his drawing out all the dark magic from the wound, knitting together the burn swiftly. It looked back to normal and she could see a feeling of ease over Killian's face. Emma hadn't even known that he was in pain, why didn't she know he was in pain?

"I've always been quite skilled at masking discomfort Swan." He replied like always, practically reading her mind.

"I need you to promise to tell me next time? Ok? How am I going to get better at controlling my temper when I don't even know what I do when I lose it?" She insisted. Another idea crossed her mind as she placed a hand over his heart.

"Swan?" He asked softly.

"Shush. Don't worry, I'm not doing anything bad." She said, focusing her power, his form flashed briefly. "I put a protective spell on you, it's not as strong as the one on Henry, but it's enough to protect you from having your heart taken, even by me."

He nodded slowly. "You know you don't need to protect me love, right? Its not your responsibility. I'm bound to get a bit banged up, especially if I'm to help you go up against the Queen." He reminded her. She placed her head over the beating in his chest, it calmed her.

"I know Killian, but let me do what I can to make sure you stay safe. Promise me you will do everything in your power to stay safe ok?" Emma hated the weakness in her voice, but she couldn't help it. He was important to her. He was more than just important.

He was it. Emma had thought before that she had found it, but the fear of something happening to him, the knowledge of hurting him…it had made her realize something.

"Alright Swan, I promise, but I have a question as well, it's been bothering me since Elsa knocked you off the Jolly, I was always told that the Dark One was invulnerable, but that doesn't seem all that true." Emma shook her head. She took a breath, Emma had never explained this to anyone before, never trusted anyone with it, but she might as well explain it to him.

Especially since the damn Sorcerer knew about it.

"It's true. If I was a regular Dark One, it would be true." She said softly, unsure whether she wanted to get into that topic with him, it was by far a very dangerous thing to discuss.

"I get the feeling that it's a sore subject, but I'd like to know if you'd like to share, but its no problem if you don't." He said turning closer to her.

"I told you how I threw the dagger, the one that control me, into another realm back in those first few days on the ship." She'd said it in a taunt, but still she'd said it. On Emma's 18th birthday, Emma had reclaimed her dagger and after a bit of time trying to find herself, (some spent under the watchful eye of Ingrid and in the company of Elsa) she'd left the dagger someone no one would ever find it.

"I recall." He said simply.

"The power of the Dark One rests in the bond I share with that dagger, holding it gives me access to unlimited powers, makes me invulnerable." She admitted. "But it also makes everything so dark that there is no light, no happiness, no love. I feel nothing, I guess great power comes great responsibility." She snickered. "It overwhelms me with darkness. They are there in my head sitting there, taunting me to do terrible deeds." She took a breath, "When I'm not holding the dagger, controlling it, the hold of the darkness loosens everything seems brighter, hopeful." It's the feeling she has now, the light from love and hope for a future. "The price is that with the daggerI can be controlled, I can be manipulated, its terrible Killian, every thought, every dream, everything is manipulated by that dagger, it's the equivalent of having my heart stolen."

Emma remembers some of the silly things planted in her mind by her mother, how she loved ball gowns, loved to watch her mother murder any servant she became attached to, how she had this overwhelming need to please her. It still leaves her wondering how much is her, and how much of her own personality is Emma.

"So when I got it back, the only way to feel anything, to be ok, was to have someone else hold it, but not use it, never use it." She continued. "I can't take being controlled Killian. I just can't."

Killian nodded, urging her to continue.

"I gave the dagger to Ingrid at first, I thought I could trust her, but I later realized she was using it too. She wanted me to ask my mother to join our family and I found myself open to let the person I despise most into my beautiful make shift family. I was already becoming frustrated with Elsa's moping, that once I realized the broken trust I did what I always do." She admitted.

"You ran." He guessed.

"I ran." She confirmed. "And decided that no one would ever have me, no one would ever want me without wanting to control me. So I chucked the thing into another realm and knew that as long as it was in another realm, that some oblivious person had it, they couldn't ever use me, they wouldn't even know how. But that's not how it was meant to be." She explained. "With such a distance between the dagger and me, it weakens my status as immortal." She explained.

"But you can get hit in the head, you can drown, you can be stabbed by a normal weapon." He realized in a breath, "I'm so sorry Emma, love."

She shook her head, she didn't want his pity, didn't need it.

"Emma, for the record, I'll have you just the way you are." He admitted. "No, more than that, you are the most beautiful, glorious thing I've ever seen, you changed my life Emma, and I would never ever want you to change for me. I hope you know that I would never dare to control you, I wouldn't even want to. I-"

Emma smiled, she knew what he wanted to say, and knew that something was holding him back. She pressed a kiss to his lips, a gentle one. "I love you Killian Jones." She said softly. She used to wait for them to say it first, but now, now she wanted to be the one, the one to take a leap of faith.

Killian, she had faith in Killian.

"God I love you. I wish we had met so long ago. I wish so many things." She moved to get up, a pink flush across her cheeks. She didn't need to hear him say it back; she just needed him to know. He grabbed her hand, standing and looking at her, as if he was trying to come to a conclusion.

"Bloody hell." He murmured, pulling her towards him, kissing her deeply, reaching his hand under her dress to land right on her hips as she tore at the buttons on his dress shirt, she felt the wall come up behind her as his mouth fell to a spot by her neck.

"Stay?" He asked with a waggle of his eyebrows, making her giggle like a teenager.

He had asked her that before, but this one was different and she knew it, this wasn't him seeking her comfort, no this was his way of offering it to her. She planted a not so gentle kiss on his smirk, making them fall back into the bed, his arm around her waist as hers tangled in his hair.

"Always." She whispered as she fell into his warm embrace.

She looked up once more to the slightly open door of the room. She swiped her finger, making the door slam shut and lock with a bit of magic.

"Ready for some pillaging and plundering pirate?" She teased.

He laughed. "As you wish."

See? Nothing graphic, just implied things. If your looking for graphic, look elsewhere, you won't find it here.

I wasn't originally planning this chapter to be a thing, but I needed certain things to happen with Killian telling the story, so random explanation/Captain Swan Cobra moment/ major Captain Swan admission was born.

Anyway, I'm busy this weekend, so it was either an early chapter or a late one, (or an extra chapter if the stars align and I find a moment after the episode.)

Guest Reviews:

andria: Belle/Lacey will be cleared up much later.

Don't forget to review!

~Luna