AN: As always, apologies for how long it took and thanks for sticking with me.

Percy landed on the ground with a thud. There was a second thud and a muffled, "Ouch!" which at least told her that she and Hermes were still together. Their captors walked away, presumably to go and get their boss or reinforcements. She struggled against the ropes that were tied around her wrists and ankles, but they were too tight. Finally she gave up, wishing whoever was in charge would get it over with and start the gloating process already.

"This is wonderful. This is perfect. This is spectacular," Hermes muttered, and Percy was pretty sure she could hear him flailing around on the ground.

"Relax. I'm sure the others were following us; they'll get us out of here before anything bad happens."

"I don't care about that," Hermes said desperately. "I care about the fact that this is probably being broadcast all around Olympus right now. I can practically hear Ares cackling." He pushed against his bonds even harder at the thought.

"Maybe you should stop writhing around then."

He stopped immediately.

"You seem very calm," he noted.

Percy chuckled. "Oh come on, this kind of stuff happens all the time! Besides you get used to the gods laughing at your mistakes after a while."

"We don't all laugh," Hermes said quietly.

"You're trying to tell me that you've never laughed when a demigod made a fool of themselves? That's a lie and we both know it."

"Well, I only laugh at the really odious ones, like that Drew girl. Surely that's justified."

Percy nodded, then remembered that they both had bags on their heads. "Yep that's justified."

Hermes sat up, finding that talking was distracting him from his humiliation. "So, oh-demigod-who-apparently-gets-captured-all-the-time, who do you think grabbed us?"

"Well, oh-arrogant-god-who-squealed-like-a-girl-when-we-got-captured, I haven't got a clue."

"I did not squeal."

Percy ignored him. "I mean I have a list of enemies longer than Apollo's stupid "Bottles of Nectar" song, and I'd imagine that there a lot of people who would be very happy to get their hands on a powerless god. Are you even still immortal while you're in Alaska?"

Hermes gulped. "I… I think so." Why hadn't he asked Athena about this before he left? Tartarus, why wasn't Athena the one down here?

Because she's smart enough to pay attention during the Olympian Council, he reminded himself.

Shut up, he told himself.

"Listen!" Percy said suddenly. "Someone's coming."

Sure enough, a group of people could be heard making their way towards Percy and Hermes.

"Do you think it's our idiot friends?" Percy asked hopefully.

Hermes listened closely. "I don't think so. There's still only two of them."

"Where are our idiot friends?" Percy wondered as the footsteps got closer.

"Does this seem familiar to anyone else?" Malcolm asked, looking around at their surroundings.

"It's a bunch of trees, of course it looks familiar. We've been looking at nothing but trees for an hour now," Jason said.

Malcolm wasn't satisfied. "Are you sure we're going the right way?"

"Yes, Malcolm, I am sure," Jason said. "This was the only trail that led away from where we crossed the border, so this has to be where they were taken."

"But what if whatever took them didn't leave a trail?"

Jason was beginning to understand why Percy always said children of Athena were irritating. He ignored Malcolm and kept walking.

"Well, what if it didn't leave a trail? Well? Well?"

"Then we're shit out of luck!" Jason finally snapped. It was a sign of how annoyed he was that he actually cursed. "This is the only lead we have, and the only choice we have is to follow it."

"Sorry," Malcolm said coolly. "I was just asking."

They walked in silence for a minute.

Jason sighed. "It's fine. I'm just tense. Listen, why don't you wait here for Apollo to catch up, I'll scout ahead and see if the trail looks promising."

He didn't wait for an answer before jogging away.

Malcolm looked around and found a nice tree to sit under. He started rifling through his bag and looking for a book to read, knowing that it would take a while for the god to reach him.

Sure enough, it took almost twenty minutes for Apollo to catch up. He was panting, with sweat dripping down his face and his hair sticking out at odd angles.

"What, stopping for a rest?" he wheezed before collapsing face-first on the ground. Malcolm noticed (with no small amount of fear) that Apollo was holding a machete.

"Um, where did you get that?" he asked, pointing at the thing. "I thought you were more of a bow and arrows guy?"

"Oh, I always carry a machete in the trunk of my chariot," the god answered, still sprawled on the ground. "You have no idea how many times it's come in handy." He patted it fondly.

Malcolm smiled and nodded before standing up and sidling away from the crazy man. He wished Jason would hurry up.

Percy struggled onto her knees. If worse came to worse, she could head-butt one of their captors in the stomach (unless they were monsters and didn't have stomachs). From the rustling coming from beside her she guessed that Hermes was trying to do the same, but he apparently wasn't having any luck.

"All right," Percy said, mostly so she wouldn't have to listen to Hermes' pathetic struggles any more, "let's get this show on the road. Who are you and what do you want?"

"Um, Percy, are you sure it's wise to make demands like that? Seeing as how we're all tied up like pigs for the slaughter?" Hermes asked weakly.

Before she could give him an indignant response the bag was ripped off her head. She blinked in the bright light, looking down at the floor until her eyes became accustomed. They were in a small warehouse filled with boxes stacked in neat piles that stretched all the way to the ceiling. She finally looked at her captors and was surprised to see two big, burly, ordinary, human-looking guys.

They were wearing collars and orange jumpsuits.

"The boss will see you now."

Jason came sprinting back.

"I found them!" he said. "There's a random building in the middle of the woods, it's the only thing around for miles. That's got to be where they were taken." He noticed that Apollo was holding a machete and opened his mouth to ask why.

"Don't," Malcolm said. "Let's just go."

"Yes!" Apollo leapt to his feet, all signs of his previous exhaustion gone. "Let's go show those blackguards what happens when they mess with our friends!" He charged into the woods, waving his machete over his head like a lasso and letting out a battle cry.

"Apollo," Jason ran after him and grabbed his arm, "we need to be quiet. We don't know how many of them there are."

"Riiiight," Apollo nodded. "Stealth mode engaged!" He tiptoed forward, now holding the machete like a baseball bat.

Jason and Malcolm looked at each other.

"We could just knock him out and leave him here," Jason suggested.

"He's a god, when he got his powers back he'd fry us," Malcolm said regretfully.

"We could pretend someone else did it."

"No, he'd find out."

"Fine, I was just kidding any way."

"No, you weren't."

"You're right, I wasn't kidding at all."

"Well, come on." Malcolm threw his bag over his shoulder. "Let's go find Percy before one of the gods gets her killed."

And they set off after Apollo.