Disclaimer: I don't own anything in the below piece of fiction, Capcom does.
Warning: Suicide
Authors Note:I have three things to discuss! 1. So I hit 300 reviews (thankyouthankyouthankyou) and I decided to draw all of you some fanart! I don't usually do fanart, so yeah, it's a treat (I hope). If you go to the bottom of my profile and click on my DA link, it should be the very first drawing you see when you got to my submissions! I hope you like it! 2. It's less than 14 days until the Fanfiction contest is over, and yet I haven't seen many submissions. I know some of you are working on pieces but are getting caught up on things, SO, would you like the contest deadline to be extended? If it will help you, I can extend the deadline by a few days. Finally, 3. I... forgot. Damns. Oh well, hope you enjoy the next chapter!
Chapter 23- Secrets
A man's true secrets are more secret to himself than they are to others. ~Paul Valery~
Chris hated being woken up early, even if it was just by five minutes.
But he hated it even more when he was woken up a good five hours before he was supposed to be, with a loud buzzing sound resonating from his bedside table and through to his sleep-addled brain.
And he hated it even more when the pillow he had been spooning decided to move in order to stop the buzzing.
Cracking an eye open, Chris relaxed his grip around Wesker's waist and watched his back as he propped himself onto his elbow and snatched the pager off of the table. Chris could only see Wesker's outline, but could feel the sudden tension in his body as soon as he squinted at the small green screen.
"May I use your phone?" Wesker asked after a time, looking over his shoulder at Chris, who was already drifting back to sleep.
"Mmhm…" Chris mumbled, rolling away from Wesker so he could leave the bed without having to untangle himself from Chris' grip.
Listening to Wesker leave the room, Chris slid over to where he had been laying and curled up into the warmth that had been left behind, fully intent on going back to sleep after being woken up at two in the morning. It hadn't even occurred to Chris that it was strange for Wesker to be getting a page at such an hour, and that maybe something serious was going on.
Instead, all Chris could think about was how he was damn tired and could get in four hours and fifty-three more minutes of sleep if he was lucky. He had almost fallen completely asleep again before Wesker's footsteps could be heard returning to the bedroom with purpose behind them, and Chris opened his eyes just in time to see him striding through the bedroom door, a determined fire behind his eyes as he flipped the light on in the room.
"Fuck!" Chris cried out, shutting his eyes as the sudden light struck him, sending sharp needle pain shooting through his eyes and the bridge of his nose.
"Get up, we've got an emergency," Wesker said, completely ignoring Chris' discomfort as he put on a pair of pants he had been wearing yesterday.
Suddenly wide awake, Chris rolled out of bed and fought the need to close his eyes, instead blinking rapidly to get used to the light in the room. He shuffled over to his dresser where he pulled out a t-shirt and boxers, throwing them both on quickly before searching for a pair of pants. "What kind of emergency?"
"It's… just an emergency that we've been asked to deal with. I've already called Jill and she'll be meeting us at the house where we've been asked to go," Wesker said, doing the buttons up on his shirt with expert speed.
"Just Jill? What about everyone else?"
"It isn't anything that requires many of us, but it is a situation that must be dealt with quickly and… with discretion. I trust you and Jill to follow orders and respect the situation." Wesker slid his sunglasses back on before Chris had a chance to try and read him, leaving Chris wanting to pull them off and demand a straight answer. Instead, he asked another question, letting annoyance filter into his words.
"So you're not going to tell me anything about this mission you're sending me on?" he asked, finally finding a pair of pants.
"We've just been asked to check up on someone who's important to our careers- now stop asking questions and do up your pants."
Rolling his eyes, Chris did as he was told and snatched a pair of socks out of an open drawer before following Wesker into the living room. Sitting on the armrest of his couch, Chris put his socks on while Wesker quickly laced up his boots, hair falling in his eyes and making him grunt in frustration.
"Won't Jill wonder why we've shown up together with you in yesterday's work clothes?" Chris asked, grabbing his boots as well.
"I should hope she would be more concerned with the mission at hand rather than the state of my appearance. I doubt she will be looking at you hard enough to see the small bite I left and I simply look like I've been up all night- and will you lace those up faster?"
Chris went to touch his neck where he suspected Wesker had bitten too hard and left a mark, before sending Wesker a glare as he finished lacing his boots. Grabbing their jackets, the two of them left Chris' apartment and hurried down to the outdoor parking where Chris' Jeep was currently collecting snow.
Chris could hear Wesker mutter under his breath about 'bloody snow' and couldn't help but agree as the cold nipped at his only-just-awake senses. Getting into the car, Chris turned it on and put the heater on full blast before getting out to brush the snow off of the windows.
Wesker stood outside the vehicle and watched Chris, stance stiff and high-strung, fingers clutching the top of his jacket closed. Chris wondered for a moment why Wesker wasn't sitting in the car, but brushed the thought aside just like the snow on the window. There were more important things to ponder.
As soon as the windows were clean, both of them got into the car, which had warmed up only a fraction. Pulling out of the parking lot, Chris let Wesker give him directions to the unknown location, staying silent for most of the ride.
Chris was concerned about what exactly the mission was about. Wesker was being even more secretive than usual, and Chris began to wonder how far he was willing to trust him. While Wesker was his Captain and Chris knew that he wouldn't purposely put his team into danger, Chris also realized that not all danger came from guns and physical violence.
Secrets could be even more dangerous, and Wesker was an incredibly secretive man.
But for now, Chris was willing to go along with what he asked, trusting him enough at this point in time that he was almost willing to blindly walk into a situation if Wesker asked it of him- which he was essentially doing right now. But it still didn't take away from the apprehension and tension Chris was feeling as they drew closer to the unknown location.
"Pull over here," Wesker instructed as they drove into a residential neighbourhood, older houses lining the street. All of the lights were turned off and the cloudy night sky reflected the street lights, making everything appear lighter than it actually was.
Pulling up beside a two story home, Chris turned the car off and listened to the ticking of the engine and Wesker's calm breathing.
"Are we waiting for Jill?" Chris asked after a time, turning to look at Wesker, who was analysing the house.
Wesker didn't reply, and instead hummed softly before going to look at his watch, eyebrows furrowed.
"Will you tell me what's going on when she arrives?" Chris tried once again, the sinking feeling in his stomach becoming worse and worse. For some reason, Chris felt a certain dread surrounding the house, and he kept his gaze on Wesker's light profile and away from the pitch black windows of the house beside him.
"I will inform you of all I know… which isn't much, unfortunately," Wesker finally said, eyes looking up from his watch to the car that was approaching from the other direction. Chris watched as the car was parked on the other side of the road and its lights turned off, soon followed by the engine.
Stepping out of the car, Jill wrapped her coat further around her form and shut the door with her elbow. Following Wesker's example, Chris left the Jeep and went to the sidewalk where Jill was headed towards.
Smiling, Chris gently nudged Jill with his elbow as the two went to stand with their backs to the house, and looked at Wesker expectantly.
Brushing back a few locks of hair from his eyes, Wesker seemed to examine the house for a time before turning his attention to the two before him. "This is the house of one of Umbrella's top researchers, a Ms. Thompson. She's been acting odd according to some people, and they've asked us to go in and see if she's all right."
"Are you expecting a… suicide?" asked Jill.
Wesker didn't say anything, and instead headed towards the house with Chris and Jill following behind, their pacing slower than Wesker's.
"Does this feel weird to you?" Chris whispered to Jill as they walked up the steps of the porch. Wesker had already rung the doorbell and was standing a distance away, hands exposed to the cold.
"Yes, a little…" Jill mumbled, paying attention to the way in which they had just come, careful of any watchful eyes.
They all stood in silence for a time before Wesker moved to knock on the door, fist thumping heavily against the oak door. Again, nothing happened and Chris began to wonder what they were going to do now before Wesker grabbed the doorknob and opened the door with ease.
"It wasn't locked…" Jill mumbled as they carefully entered the warm house, all of the lights turned off. They were basked in darkness as soon as the door closed, and Chris let his eyes adjust themselves to the newfound darkness as they headed into the living room that was adjacent to the hallway.
"Ms. Thompson!" Wesker called out once, before turning to call up the stairs. Chris watched him for a moment before movement in the corner of his eye caught his attention.
Quickly turning all of his attention to the movement, Chris narrowed his eyes and walked closer, trying to figure out what it was before Jill switched the light on in the room, illuminating the shadowed movement to Chris.
"Shit."
That was all Chris could say as he stared at the hanging body of Ms. Thompson.
She had been dead for some time; her features already pale and face bloating as she swung gently from the exposed rafters on the ceiling, lank brown hair covering half her face. She was dressed in a simple, elegant black dress, and Chris looked down to see a suicide note laying under where she hung.
She had planned this, and Chris figured she had been contemplating this for some time before she went ahead and did it.
"She killed herself…" Jill said from behind Chris, voice soft and eyes wide.
"No, she died of a heart attack."
"What?" Chris turned around and watched Wesker stride into the living room. Bending down, Wesker picked up the suicide letter and read through it quickly, ignoring the shocked expressions on both Chris and Jill's faces.
Chris watched Wesker carefully as he read the letter, and noticed a slight amount of tension appear at the corners of his lips before he folded the letter and pocketed it.
"She died of a heart attack," Wesker repeated once again, finally turning his attention to Chris and Jill. "Now help me cut her down."
"W-what? No, no, we can't do that! We need to call 911 and get some backup in here before we go messing with anything!" Chris said, his eyes wide as he stared at his Captain.
"Don't refuse an order. Now catch her body when I cut the rope. And Jill, I want you to call Chief Irons at his house and tell him to send in the previously arranged squad." Wesker pulled a pocket knife from his jacket pocket and flipped the sharp blade upwards, the blade glinting in the dimly lit room.
Pulling a chair from the desk in the corner, Wesker positioned it carefully and nodded for Chris to stand near the body as Jill went off to do as she was told, obviously under a lot of conflict- just like Chris.
He was supposed to trust Wesker, but this seemed like a very shifty situation, like there was a cover-up going on and Chris wanted no part in it.
But he didn't have time to think before Wesker had completely cut the rope, and a heavy, lifeless body dropped awkwardly into Chris' arms. Pushing back any disgust, Chris lowered the body to the ground, setting her as carefully as he could.
She may be dead, but respect had to be shown.
"Wesker, what the fuck is going on?" Chris asked as soon as the body was resting on the floor. Standing up, Chris strode over to Wesker, who was still on the chair and was untying the rope from the ceiling.
"Nothing is going on; as you can see, she clearly died of a heart attack." Chris could see up and behind Wesker's sunglasses, and noticed the irritation in his eyes.
"She did not die of a heart attack, and this is clearly some sort of cover-up and I-" Chris stopped talking as soon as he looked at the mantle over the fireplace, photos resting upon it.
They were family photos, and in every single one of them there was a young girl smiling brightly, innocence on her happy features. She couldn't have been more than five years old…
"She has a child…" Chris whispered, eyes going wide as he looked at the photographs.
"What?" Wesker let the rope drop to the ground beside the body and turned to look over his shoulder at the mantel.
"She has a fucking kid!" Chris said before taking off up the stairs, pushing past Jill, who had returned from the kitchen. Taking the steps two at a time, Chris ignored Jill's questions and turned to go down the hallway, throwing open the doors as he did so.
Bathroom, office, storage, bedroom-
Throwing open the last door, Chris was greeted with the sight of a young girl sitting on her bed, blanket wrapped around her form as she hugged a teddy bear close to her chest, tears streaming down her face.
"I'm sorry, but your parents passed away…"
Claire was crying- she was pressed against him and she was crying and she wouldn't stop. No matter what he did or what he said, she just wouldn't stop…
"Please, Claire… Please stop crying…"
As soon as Chris had opened the door, she let out a whimper and pressed herself against the wall, eyes wide as she stared at the looming figure in the hallway. She didn't say anything, and Chris walked into the light coming from her beside table so she could see him properly.
"Hi there… I'm Officer Chris Redfield and I'm with the city police…" Chris said, keeping his voice calm as he pulled out his badge. Footsteps could be heard behind him, and Chris knew Jill was approaching them.
The girl continued to shrink up against the wall, but Chris continued to walk slowly into the room, his badge held out so she could see it carefully. As soon as he was close enough to the bed, Chris knelt down and held the badge out.
"You can take it if you would like…" he said, hoping she would reach out and take the badge. She was looking at it carefully, and while the tears continued to fall, she seemed to relax slightly given the circumstances.
Slowly, very slowly, she reached out and carefully traced the stars on his badge, small fingers pressing against the cool metal.
"Did you find Mommy?" she asked, voice small and cracked as she retracted her hand. Jill had appeared beside Chris, her hand resting on his shoulder as he continued to kneel in front of the child.
"Yes, we found your mommy," Jill said softly, going to sit on the edge of the bed.
"She sent me to bed… and she was reading me a story and she was crying… and she tucked me in and told me to be a good girl before she left," the girl began, voice distant as she toyed with the ear on her teddy bear. "I woke up because I wanted water… and she wasn't in her bedroom so I went looking for her…"
She didn't finish her sentence, and Chris didn't want to hear it. All he wanted to do was get out of the room as soon as possible, his emotions getting the better of him. Jill was talking to the little girl now, and Chris continued to stare at the teddy bear she was holding, unable to look at the little girl in fear of seeing Claire's face once again.
Multiple voices could be heard downstairs now, and Chris took the opportunity to get up and leave, his badge forgotten on the bed beside the girl.
Hurrying down the steps, Chris pushed past the cops who had arrived and stumbled down the icy steps on the porch. Going to the side of the building, Chris collapsed against the house and hunched over himself, willing his emotions to go away.
Why would a parent just leave their child like that? Why would they willingly leave when they knew how much they were depended upon, not just for support but for the love that only a mother or father could give?
"They're gone, Claire, and they're not coming back."
"Why did they just leave us like this, Chris?"
"B-because… they had no choice."
She had a choice.
That woman had a choice, and she decided to leave her little girl. Leave her to discover her body in the middle of the night after committing a selfish, horrible act.
Pressing the palms of his hands against his eyes, Chris was desperate for the tears to go away as he clenched his jaw tight. He would not show his weakness- not here and not now.
He didn't know how long he had been up against the house fighting feelings that continued to haunt him, but he looked up quickly when he heard the crunching of snow as footsteps approached.
Meeting her gaze, Chris let his guard down for a moment and became wrapped in the concern and emotion evident in Jill's eyes.
"Are you okay?" Jill asked, kneeling down in front of Chris. Chris wanted to say he was fine, to brush it off and stand up to continue with the mission, but instead he let out a choked sob and rested his head back against the house.
"No…" he whispered as Jill pulled him into a hug, her gentle fingers combing through his hair as he began to cry softly, tears falling freely.
They stayed together for a while, snow soaking into their pants, making them both wet and cold. And yet they refused to separate, with Chris hanging onto Jill like a lifeline. She was his support at the moment, someone he could trust to help him even when he wouldn't explain why he was so broken. He had never let his guard down in front of anyone before, and he knew he would feel shame and regret later… but that was later.
Finally, Jill pulled away and lifted Chris' chin with her hand, a soft smile on her lips. She didn't say anything, and simply brushed a few tears away from his cheeks before standing up. Jill extending her hand downwards, and Chris took it and let her help him up, his legs numb and tingling from the crouched position he had fallen into.
"You going to be okay?" Jill asked, rubbing his arm gently. Chris was about to reply before he noticed a figure standing a distance away.
"Wesker…" Chris said, his voice quiet.
"We're done here, so you can go home, Ms. Valentine," Wesker said, a hint of anger in his words as he turned his attention to her.
"Did you guys hitch a ride together?" Jill asked, moving a few steps away from Chris as she began to head to her car.
"Chris had to drive past my place in order to arrive here, so he picked me up. Now go home and get some rest. I will see you tomorrow at the office at the usual hour. As well, don't tell anyone about this late night mission."
Jill nodded slowly, eyes looking from Chris to Wesker quickly before she hurried off to her car, arms wrapped tightly around her slim form.
"Let's go," Chris mumbled, walking past Wesker quickly, shoulder bumping against Wesker's with more force than necessary. Wesker took the blow well enough, and followed behind Chris, shoes crunching against the snow.
"What's going to happen to the little girl?" Chris asked as he got in the car. Wesker got in as well and did his seatbelt up before answering.
"I do not know, but child services showed up before we left and I assume she will be taken care of there."
Chris started the car but let it sit for a while, wanting the vehicle to warm up as well as desiring to ask Wesker a few questions while he wasn't distracted by driving.
But it seemed Wesker had other ideas, and beat Chris to the first question.
"Why were you and Jill so close at the side of the house?"
Chris glanced at Wesker out of the corner of his eye, trying to read him. "I… I was uncomfortable given the situation, so I had to leave. Jill was helping me recover from the… shock."
"Did you kiss her?"
"What? No, why the fuck would I do that?" Chris asked, eyebrows furrowed and mouth open.
"You two seemed close, and I was simply wondering if you had decided to go back to women," Wesker said, completely rational in his manners, despite the jealous hint to his questions.
"Wesker, just because she was comforting me doesn't mean I want something from her and she wants something from me. God, you're so socially awkward that I wonder how you function sometimes!" Slamming his hand on the steering wheel, Chris put the car into drive and pulled away from the curb violently, making the wheels spin in the snow for a moment before they were driving in a straight line.
"I was merely curious to know whether or not you were still fretting about your sexuality like some young teenager," Wesker said, irritation in his voice.
"Well I'm not, so just fucking stop talking about it," Chris said, completely fed up with Wesker's attitude at the moment. "And seeing as how you've been able to ask questions, I think it's time I asked one myself. What the hell is up with this bullshit cover-up?"
"There is no cover-up, dear heart, she died of a heart attack and that is that. Now stop talking about it," Wesker said, finally showing real anger.
"Don't call me dear heart right now, Wesker. How the hell are we supposed to trust you as our Captain if you pull shady stunts like this, huh? Did you honestly think Jill and I weren't going to wonder why you said what you said and then take the fucking suicide note and put it in your pocket? The regular police unit doesn't even know about the letter, do they?"
Chris turned a corner sharply and they skidded around the bend, almost running into a parked car. Wesker's knuckles were tight around the ends of the armrests, and Chris could feel the tension in him.
'Good,' Chris thought to himself, 'let him get uncomfortable.'
"We're not talking about this, Christopher. Now stop letting your emotions get in the way and drive the car properly before you get us both killed," Wesker growled out, watching as Chris almost skidded the car into another parked one yet again.
Chris gritted his jaw and managed to get them to Wesker's apartment without crashing, but he was still as angry as ever. As soon as he had stopped, Wesker was already undoing his seatbelt and getting out of the car.
"Control your emotions, Chris, or you're going to suffer the consequences." Wesker glared at Chris before slamming the door closed, making the Jeep rock.
Letting out a frustrated growl, Chris threw the door of his car open and stalked after Wesker, intent on getting an answer from him one way or another. He was sick of rolling over for Wesker and letting him walk all over his team.
Catching up to him before he had even reached the other side of the street, Chris grabbed Wesker's shoulder and pulled him around before going to punch him. Wesker managed to grab Chris' wrist just before it made contact, and tried to twist his arm around so he couldn't attack again. Unfortunately for the two men, they both slipped, bodies pushing and pulling against each other as they fell down heavily in the middle of the street.
"I want a fucking answer, you bastard," Chris cried out, not even fazed by the heavy fall. He realized he would feel the impact in the morning, but he didn't care about that now. He had managed to prop himself upwards and immediately climbed on top of Wesker, who began to struggle, his arms becoming pinned above his head and legs spread, a position that Chris knew would make him uncomfortable.
"Get off of me, Christopher," Wesker said, and Chris thought he heard a note of panic.
"Don't like this much, do you? Well I don't like being left in the fucking dark," Chris said as Wesker stopped struggling. A moment passed, and for a second Chris thought he had gotten somewhere, that he had actually scared Wesker into a confession.
That was until Wesker lifted his head quickly, slamming his forehead into the bridge of Chris' nose. Crying out in pain, Chris instinctively reached up to cup his nose as blood began to pour out, and Wesker took the opportunity to shove Chris off of him.
Standing up quickly, Wesker brushed off the snow on his jacket and pushed his glasses further up the bridge of his nose.
"Have you ever stopped to consider the possibility that I don't tell you these things in order to protect you?" he asked, kneeling down to grasp the collar of Chris' jacket. "You should relish in the ignorance I bestow upon you."
Crashing their lips together, Wesker paid little mind to Chris' cry of pain as his nose was once again slammed into forcefully, and instead tangled his tongue with Chris'.
Chris grabbed Wesker's wrist with his bloody hand and held down with bruising force before he bit Wesker's tongue, making him jerk back quickly. Wesker stayed in place for a moment, lips almost touching Chris' as Chris sneered up at him, nose bruising as the blood slowly stopped.
Standing up straight, Wesker looked down at Chris before spitting out blood onto the pure white snow away from the two of them.
"I expect you to listen to whatever I tell you with no questions asked," Wesker finally said before striding to his apartment, opening the door and shutting it firmly behind him. Chris watched him go, and saw him cup his mouth as he turned the corner and went down the hallway towards the elevators.
Standing up after a time, Chris brushed the snow off of his jacket and wiped his hand under his bloodied nose as he stumbled back to his car, the anger gone and replaced by disbelief and a newfound understanding about his lover.
Because it was at that point in time that Chris realized Wesker was a very dangerous man- a very dangerous man that he couldn't seem to tear himself away from.
Just as a point of interest- I think this is the first chapter... wait, damn it! Last weeks chapter was the first chapter where I didn't skip ahead or change the scene/setting quickly! Interesting thing I discovered that I thought you all might enjoy knowing too... or not. It's all good. ANYWAYS! Things are getting a little more intense when it comes to work related situations, eh? Can anyone guess why an Umbrella researcher would want to commit suicide? Hmm? Anyways, I hope you enjoyed the chapter, and once again, thank you for all of the reviews/favorites/watches/support. You guys are all fabulous! PS- No, this does not mean I am going to write ChrisxJill- they're best friends, nothing more