Disclaimer: I do not own any Percy Jackson characters.

Here is a the second in a series of oneshots I'm making about Mary Sues. Please don't take this seriously. I just hate Mary Sues.

What up? My name is Celeste Angel Cloud Rosette Chocolate Mellow Yellow Sky Rainbow Marshmallow Sparkles Midnight Black Cat Flutter Nutter Peanut Butter McAwesomeness. I have shiny blonde hair that cascades down my back in ringlets, and limpid blue eyes with a silver circle surrounding the pupil. I'm tan, athletic, and have a sexy bod. You could say I'm the girl of every guy's dreams.

I was walking down the street one day in my pink Gucci shoes and pink skirt and pink eyeliner when suddenly this chic appeared out of thin air. She had brown hair woven into braids and a white dress. She was really pretty, but not nearly as much as me.

"Greetings, Celeste. I am Hera, queen of the gods," she said. "Your mother and father are only foster parents. You're my daughter."

I squealed excitedly. I always knew I was special. "So if you're my mother, who is my father?"

"Dionysus, god of wine."

"That means I'm a goddess! Awesome!" I clapped excitedly, and I'm sure Mommy was wondering why I was taking the news so calmly. It's because I'm perfect, of course! Duh.

"Now," my mommy announced. "We shall go to Mount Olympus where you will meet the rest of the Olympians."

"Yay!"

Mommy took me to Olympus and into this big room with a lot of big chairs. The Olympians were sitting around, staring at me enviably, with the exception of Artemis. She wasn't even glancing in my direction. She'll pay for that. I looked around and, you'll never believe this, there wasn't a chair for ME! How could they forget me?

"Where's my chair?" I asked sweetly.

"There are only twelve Olympians," said Artemis. "You are only a minor goddess."

The time for being nice was over. "Minor goddess? Minor goddess? How dare you call me that! I am perfect in every way! I will be an Olympian!" I gave a defiant battle cry, which was incredibly sexy.

Then I did what anyone would have done: I ran up to Artemis, pushed her off the throne. She fell through a hole in the ground I conjured because I have every gods' abilities for some reason. She screamed on the way down and all the Olympians cheered, "Huzzah!" And then they started to sing Greensleeves.

"Thank goodness you got rid of her," said Aphrodite while examining herself in a mirror.

Zeus nodded in agreement. "She was so uptight. I like you better, Celeste."

"Me too!" Everyone else said.

And that is how I, Celeste Angel Cloud Rosette Elizabeth Chocolate Mellow Yellow Sky Rainbow Marshmallow Sparkles Midnight Black Cat Flutter Nutter Peanut Butter McAwesomeness, became an Olympian. Oh yeah!