Parenthetical Love Epilogue: Best Laid Plans

A/N: Okay, folks. You're going to want to prepare yourself. Take a deep breath. Make sure you're sitting down. Yes. It's. Fluff. With a side of fluffernut sauce.

Disclaimer: I donut own them. Stephenie does, and I'm so glad she shared them with us.

"Mommy! Daddy! Daddy!"

Edward's eyes snapped open, and he looked around blearily, trying to find the danger. He saw Bella, blinking sporadically as she tried to shake off sleep. Then came another wail. "Mommmmeeeeeeeee. Daaaaddddeeeee."

Throwing off the blankets, Edward darted out into the hall, two rooms over to his daughter's room. He knew Bella was right behind him. The moment he stepped through the door he took in Arianna's miniature form. She was sobbing into her pillow, her entire body shaking even under the blanket. Edward's heart twisted, but he was relieved, seeing she was in one piece.

"Baby," he said soothingly, untangling the blankets from her thrashing form. "Ari, wake up. It's just a nightmare. You're okay." He picked her up, holding her close to him as he sat on the edge of her bed. "Shhh, shhh, baby. We've got you."

Ari stopped screaming automatically, clinging to his neck as she cried. Bella sat beside them, running her fingers through the little girl's sleep-mussed, chestnut hair. They shared a chagrined look over her shaking shoulders, and Bella rolled her eyes slightly. As it turned out, Ari was a huge fan of scary movies. Edward didn't see the problem with a good scare… and besides, Ari had given him that please-Daddy-please look.

"There's a monster," Ari complained, her voice muffled because she spoke into his shirt.

"Ari, we've had this discussion, remember? The monster from the movie isn't real," Edward said quietly.

This made Ari lift her head, and she gave Edward a Daddy-why-are-you-so-dumb look – an exact replica of how Bella looked at him frequently except in a smaller size and with beautiful emerald colored eyes instead of deep brown ones. "I know that," she said in her best 'duh' voice. "That monster is fick-shun-ul," she pronounced the word deliberately. "It's an other monster. It's really hairy. And ugly."

"It's Uncle Jacob?" Edward asked.

"Edward," Bella admonished, smacking his arm lightly.

"Nooooo," Ari protested. "He's in my closet. He wants my hats!"

"So he's Uncle Jasper."

Bella covered her face with her hands, trying to smother her giggles.

"No! Daddy, are you even listening?" She was scowling at him – another look he saw on Bella's face frequently.

Edward had to try very hard to put his serious face on after that. It was hard not to laugh. "Yes, you have my full attention, baby," he promised.

She studied him carefully and then rolled her eyes. Twisting in his arms, she looked to her mother. "Mommy, Daddy won't get the monster."

"That's because Daddy doesn't know how to catch monsters. That's a job for mommies," Bella said, nodding gravely. She made a move like she was opening a big bag. "See, mommies have monster catching kits." She pretended to rummage through the imaginary bag. "Ah, this will do."

Edward watched, almost as fascinated as Arianna, as Bella put on a whole scene. She slunk over to Ari's closet, threw the door open, pretended to wrestle the monster into her net while Ari squealed and bounced on his lap, and finally prevailed.

"Ari! Open the window!" Bella cried, pretending to struggle with the netted monster.

Ari hopped off Edward's lap, scurrying over to the window. She pushed it open as much as her short frame would allow. "Go, Mommy!" she cheered as Bella released the monster out the window.

Sweeping her daughter up into her arms for a celebratory hug and kiss, Bella walked her back over to the bed. "Okay, kid. The monster's gone and it's still nighttime. Can you sleep now?"

Arianna considered this. "Lullaby?" she requested.

Bella looked up at Edward. "That's Daddy's department."

~0~

"Daddy," a little voice sing-songed.

Edward looked up from his laptop to see Arianna peeking over the edge of his desk, watching him. He raised a questioning eyebrow at her. "Whatchoo doin'?" she asked.

"Shopping for a birthday present for Mommy," he answered.

"Oooh! Can I help?" she hurried around to his side of the desk and clambered up onto his lap without waiting for an answer.

"I suppose you can," he chuckled.

"It's always someone's birthday, huh?" she asked, putting her hand over his to 'help' move the mouse. Bella had taken her shopping to get a present for Irina and Katrina the day before.

Since Arianna's birth, almost five years before, the family had expanded exponentially. Emmett had finally convinced Tanya to have another baby. Their son, Carson Carlisle Cullen, turned two a couple weeks previous, in August. Jasper and Peter had a daughter, Bethany Charlotte Whitlock, three. Arianna also spent a lot of time with the siblings that Mike and Leah had adopted, Kaylee Marie Newton, four and Derek William Newton, one. On top of this, Rosalie was five months pregnant with her and Alice's second child.

"We have a lot to celebrate," Edward allowed, kissing the top of his daughter's head.

"I like parties," Ari commented amiably. "Daddy?"

"Yes, Ari?"

"Can I have a baby brother or sister like Dash?"

"Uh…."

~0~

Bella looked around Esme and Carlisle's backyard, taking in her family. Arianna and Dash were in the pool, each of them clinging like monkeys to the back of one of the twins. Edward was sitting on the grass, ever watchful of his daughter, as he sipped a beer. Nearby, Emmett was trying to coach Carson how to wrestle.

"Watch and learn, little man. Watch and learn," Emmett said. He took advantage of the fact that Edward was preoccupied and tackled his brother.

Edward wasn't as oblivious as he was pretending to be. Moving quickly, he dodged Emmett's tackle and went at his brother full force. "Hey!" Emmett protested as they grappled. "You cheat."

"Ha!" Edward grunted. "It's not my fault you're slow and obvious."

Tanya went and picked Carson up before he could get run over by the rolling men. "You are explaining to his preschool teacher why he keeps tackling the other kids," she said, pretending to scowl.

"Babe," Emmett panted as he got Edward into a headlock, "I'm telling you. Triple C is a perfect wrestler's name. It's what he was born to d-"

He cut off as Edward threw him backward, rolling out of his choke hold .

A deep chuckle drew her attention away from the wrestling childr-… men. Bella looked up just as Jasper sat down in the lounge chair beside her. He sat Bethany between his legs, holding the squirming girl with one hand while wielding sunscreen lotion with the other. "Boys will be boys," he laughed, looking over at Emmett and Edward. "It makes me glad I had a sister." He kissed Bethany, nuzzling his nose in her neck so the little girl giggled. "And it makes me glad my Bethy is a perfect princess."

Bella snorted. "Bethany is not dainty. She downed Dash the other day when the kids were playing."

Jasper looked over at Bella, rolling his eyes. "Not for nothing, sugar, but that boy is a lover not a fighter." He shook his head, smiling lightly. It was true. Dash wasn't a wimp – that was an impossibility, his parents being who they were. He was a tough little kid. He simply preferred to talk circles around anyone who threatened him. He had certainly inherited Jasper's gentle, insightful nature.

And Jasper was proud of the boy, as any uncle would be. But his daughter was the apple of his eye.

Once Jasper had covered Bethany in sunscreen from head to toe, added floaties to her skinny arms and sent her off to play in the pool with Peter, Bella caught his attention. "Jasper?"

"Yes, Bella?"

"Are you and Peter going to have any more kids?" she asked quietly.

Jasper raised his eyebrow, looking at her with a knowing expression. "Yeah, actually. I haven't had a chance to tell you…" his face grew a little somber, "what with everything that's happening with Jacob and Lizzie…"

Bella grimaced. When they'd finally started to try for a family, Jacob and Lizzie found they were having problems conceiving. Bella's heart went out to her friends, especially every time she saw them watching everyone else's children with a bittersweet look in their eyes.

"We have an appointment at the clinic in a couple of days," Jasper continued.

"That's really great, Jasper. Congratulations."

Jasper nodded. "So…" he said when she didn't say anything else. "Are you thinking of giving Ari a sibling too?"

Bella ignored him and put on her sunglasses.

~Some weeks later~

"I've been thinking…" Bella began but trailed off.

Edward raised an eyebrow and then grinned at her, climbing on the bed and crawling over her body. "Uh oh. Should I be worried?" His grin faltered when she didn't look at him, instead tracing his lips and the shape of his jaw with her pointer finger. "Bella?"

Sighing – because obviously her nerves in this situation were utterly ridiculous – Bella raised her eyes to meet his. He must have read in her eyes that this conversation was going to be serious, because he instantly straightened up. It took him a moment to sit back against the headboard, but then he opened his arms, and Bella gladly climbed into them.

She felt instantly calmer with his arms around her. "You know," she began, "I never felt slighted that I was an only child. The only time I ever wished for a sibling was thinking it'd be nice to have a big brother around. I don't think there's anything wrong with being an only child…"

"But?" Edward prompted.

"But watching you with Emmett and Rosalie… and watching the twins with Carson, and even Kaylee and Derek, I've just come to realize what a beautiful connection siblings have. It's not something you can duplicate, you know? I mean, she's close with Dash, and he'll always be her cousin, but it's not the same relationship at all."

Edward shifted so that he could look at her. "Bella… are you saying you want another baby?"

He was, Bella knew, trying to keep the hope out of his voice. Still, she heard it. She'd known he wanted another child for a long time but had been resistant to the idea. Arianna was fine and had plenty of company with all of her cousins and friends. "I don't want to be pregnant again," Bella said flatly. While she had enjoyed feeling her baby move inside of her, Bella was simply not one of those women who liked being pregnant. Her daughter was more than worth it, but she knew there were other options for them as well. "I was wondering how you feel about adoption."

Edward blinked, obviously taken by surprise, and Bella continued. "I don't think adoption is for everyone, so you can tell me if you couldn't love an adopted child the same way you love Ari. But there are so many children who need a good home and a loving family to take care of them. Edward, our family is amazing. We have the means and the love to give."

He put a finger over her lips, a slow smile spreading across his face. "I think that adoption is a beautiful idea. We could have a chance to help a woman in a difficult situation, like Charlotte."

Back when Charlotte had carried Bethany for Jasper and Peter, she'd told them all the story of her first pregnancy. She'd been knocked up after a one night stand when she was 19. Nearly destitute and lacking any sort of maternal instinct, she'd put the baby up for adoption when she was barely two months pregnant. The family that agreed to adopt her child had taken very good care of her. They'd paid for all the doctors appointments she needed and had gone the extra mile of pampering her as much as possible. She'd had gifts and spa treatments – the works. On top of that, she really enjoyed being pregnant. She loved the idea that she could give life to a creature, house it and grow it. She just also liked being able to give the baby away to someone else to raise. So she'd been a natural choice for surrogacy for Jasper and Peter, and they'd spoiled the hell out of her while she was pregnant.

"We could go the Juno route," Bella said, nodding carefully. Then she grinned mischievously, wiggling her eyebrows at him. "Or we could adopt an older child. Maybe skip the whole potty training ordeal."

Edward laughed and rolled them so that he was on top of her again. He kissed her softly, and then harder as joy got the best of him. When he broke the kiss his utter happiness radiated from his eyes. "We'll look into everything and find the right choice for us," he said decisively.

Putting both hands on either side of his face, Bella let herself feel excited. She giggled, a little giddy and nervous at the prospect of being a mother to another child. "Okay," she said, pulling his face down for another kiss.

"Okay," he agreed, his hands already bunching the fabric of her nightshirt, inching it up her torso. He rained kisses on the skin of her belly, brushing his fingers over her breasts. When her shirt was off and he'd kissed a line all the way up from her stomach, peppering kisses across her nipples, and then nipping gently at her neck, he finally kissed her full on the lips again. "I love you, Bella."

Her answering smile was soft, and she stroked his cheek. "I love you too."

~0~

"Sweetheart?"

"Mommy?"

Bella blinked, her back popping as she sat upright. She looked around, confused. It took her a minute to realize that she was at the kitchen table where she'd fallen asleep amidst an impressive pile of paperwork. Edward stood with their daughter in his arms. They were watching her. Edward was trying not to laugh. Arianna was giggling so hard she was turning red.

"Mommy! There's a paper stuck to your face!" she said gleefully. She tilted forward in Edward's arms, reaching out and helpfully removing the post-it that was adorning Bella's cheek.

"Thanks, kid," she said ruefully, standing and giving her daughter a butterfly kiss before turning to Edward. He had a strange look in his eyes that made her stop short. "What? Is there another one?" She patted her face self-consciously.

Instead of answering her, Edward set Ari on her feet, squatting so he could address her. "You made something for Mommy at school today, right? Why don't you go get it so you can show her."

"Yeah! Yeah!" Ari bounced enthusiastically and ran off toward the living room to find her backpack.

Edward stood again and turned to her, studying her carefully. "This is the second time you've conked out at the kitchen table in a week."

"I've been tired. What of it?"

Again, he just looked at her for a long, tense moment. "Bella, do you think maybe… do you think you could be pregnant?"

Bella's breath caught in her throat. Her mind went blank for the one, two, three seconds. She looked down at all the adoption paperwork in front of her from multiple agencies. "No," she said bluntly.

Before Edward could argue, Ari came flying back into the kitchen, effectively ending the conversation.

~0~

"I don't know what to do with her," Edward groaned into his hands. "She's pregnant. I'm sure of it. I just can't get her to take a test. Or even talk about it."

"Pregnancy is a big thing to wrap your head around, no matter how many times you've done it," his mother soothed, petting his hair. "Give her time."

"How much time should I give her?" Edward grumbled.

"If she's having contractions and still insisting she's not pregnant, then I would worry," Carlisle offered cheerfully.

Edward just groaned again, shaking his head. Bella was in complete denial. She still kept talking about adoption. She fell asleep at all hours of the day, had pushed her dinner away the day previous because she was nauseated, and Aunt Flo had, to the best of his knowledge, been non-existent in their household for a good amount of time.

Taking pity on her son, Esme announced, "I think that we should have garlic chicken for dinner tonight. Don't you?"

Edward was confused until Bella arrived for dinner. She took one step in the house, clamped a hand over her mouth and darted for the bathroom.

"That wasn't nice, Mom," Edward admonished, realizing what she'd done. The house reeked of garlic and onions.

"What?" Esme asked innocently. "You wanted her not to be able to deny it."

"Where's Mommy?" Ari asked worriedly, noticing everyone was gathered except her mother and Dash's.

"Yeah, where's Mommy?" Dash asked Alice.

"Mommy and Aunt Bella are probably going to have to eat outside on the deck today," Alice said, obviously amused. Rosalie, eight months pregnant now, had nearly fainted when she entered the house earlier. "It's a good thing we live in California. If we lived where it rained, they'd be too cold. Poor things."

Shaking his head, Edward kisses his daughter's hair and went to see if Bella was okay. He found her out on the front stoop, sitting on the stairs and taking in slow, deep lung-fulls of chilly December air. Quietly, he sat down beside her, waiting for her to speak.

"Edward," she started, then sighed. "I don't know how to say this."

"Wait. Give me a minute to prepare my surprised face." He tapered down his grin so he could stare at her with blank concern. "Okay, go."

In spite of herself, Bella smiled. "Can you stop looking so g'damn happy about this?"

"About what, Bella?" he asked, a grin already threatening to betray his cool exterior.

She elbowed him, and Edward chuckled, putting his arm around her. "I'm pregnant," she admitted.

Resting his chin on her head, Edward allowed himself to smile. Hard. "I know," he said softly. "Are you okay?"

Her shoulders shook slightly as she trembled, her voice sounding small. "Yeah, I am. And I'm happy... I just..." She looked up at him, her eyes a little watery. "Promise me an uncomplicated pregnancy. Please?"

Kissing her forehead and her nose and her cheeks, Edward held her tightly. "I'm going to take such good care of you," he promised.

~Some weeks later~

"Oh, God," Bella moaned, covering her face with her hands as she stared at the little screen. "This is not what I call uncomplicated," she whined to Edward. "And this is all your fault."

For his part, Edward was still blinking in open-mouthed shock at ultrasound technician who stood opposite, still pressing the wand to Bella's belly. "Can you...repeat that?"

The technician seemed amused. "There are two heartbeats," he repeated. He moved the wand, searching. "Yeah, there it is," he tapped the screen.

Some hours later they were sitting at home on the couch. Neither of them said much after they dropped Ari off to spend some time with Charlie. Though Edward had his arm around her, they were both lost in their own worlds, deep in thought.

Then Bella laughed. She couldn't help it. She laughed so hard that she actually started crying. Edward looked at her as if she'd grown another head. "Bella?" he asked, obviously not sure how to take her giggle fit.

"I was just thinking," she said, calming. "I am...overwhelmed at the prospect of having two babies at once. I'm overwhelmed at the thought of going from having one child to having three. It is absolutely hysterical to me that, when it comes to my family, every single plan I've ever made has gone in a completely different direction than I intended."

Edward smirked. "Best laid plans and all that," he murmured.

Bella nodded. "But all that aside, I've got nothing to complain about. Life doesn't ever happen the way you plan it, no matter how careful you are. Look at Jake and Lizzie – on their fourth IVF attempt and here I am, pregnant with twins when I didn't even want to get pregnant again. Nothing about how I wanted to make a family has gone as planned… but because of that, I have a beautiful daughter." She smiled and ran a finger down his nose. "And you."

"Yes," Edward agreed, his face softening and the tension at his brow easing. "You and Ari are more than I ever could have expected out of life." His arms around her, he hugged her close. "You're everything."

Bella tilted her head, pressing her lips to his as her body relaxed against him. Edward's hand sneaked under the hem of her shirt, his hand splayed over the gentle swell of her belly as his breath caught. His babies. And he would be there for them, wanting them, from the minute he knew they existed.

"We can do this, right?" Bella asked breathlessly.

"You are capable of anything," Edward said fervently. "So together? Yeah, Bella. We're pretty much unstoppable."

She chuffed, but smiled, and kissed him again.

A/N: Apparently I decided since I'm never writing a baby fic again that I was just going for broke. DAMN that's a lot of babies.

The additional children were named by twitina, jfka06, and barburella. Endless thanks to barburella, tellingmelies, jadedandboring and twilightmundi for handholding/betaing.

Not to be cheesy but it has been an honor and a privilege writing for you. I've loved your enthusiasm, and I thank you so much for sharing all your pregnancy, birth and child stories.

Other projects-

Underworld: Edward/Bella/Jasper - lots of kink. Light BDSM and slash. If that's your thing. There is a romantic plotline in there with all the bondage.

In the Mirror: Angst fic. Hardcore angst fic. E/B yes, but expect... angst.

As I said before, Parenthetical Love will eventually have outtakes. For sure there is a Jasper/Peter smuttake. There will be Rosalie and Alice's first time and how they got together for the Fandom for Sexual Assault Awareness compilation. It will eventually be posted here. Other than that, keep me on alert because these characters haven't stopped talking to me. I just don't know what I'm going to do with them yet. Still open to suggestions.

But, for the time being, I thank you and mark this story complete.