Chapter Fifteen: Pictures To Burn
I stood in the middle of the backyard the next night, only 24 hours after Eric had left, and this time for good. It was only 24 hours after I had decided to cut Eric out of my life for good, only 24 hours after I had decided to erase every single memory of his. It was hard of course. We had some good times together, that I wouldn't deny. He had made me happy, and even though that happiness was rare, it seemed to outweigh all the problems and the misery. But those happy times were over now. I couldn't continue to put myself through this pain, through this agony. Eric wasn't going to come back. He wasn't going to allow himself to be with me, not completely, not how I wanted. So this was it. This was that moment in my life that I had to let him go, no matter how hard it may be.
So I stood there, Sookie and Sam safely tucked in their bed inside of the house. I had made sure that they had both been asleep when I snuck out here. I didn't fear being alone outside at night. This was the only time I could do this without someone watching, without opinions I wasn't sure I wanted to hear. Without hesitation, I snapped my fingers and the firewood I had set out burst into flames. I stared into the flickering reds and oranges, almost getting lost in the self created flames. There was something oddly comforting about fire. I had never liked it when I was a child, and maybe that was because when my parents' car had crashed, the front of the car had caught on fire. But now, the fire hardly seemed like an enemy. It felt like it was my only friend, like it was the only thing I could count on. I suspected it was because I was a Phoenix that I felt that way. After all, fire was the element of choice. But there was something else about it. Fire didn't lie. It didn't hide the truth. It burnt through everything and anything, not sparing a single thing. It was almost a welcome sight, and I knew just how morbid and disturbing that thought was.
"What are you doing out here alone, Elizabeth?" Godric's voice broke through my thoughts.
I sighed as I turned my head and found the vampire crossing the backyard to where I stood a good foot or two away from the naked flames.
"Nothing." I mumbled, looking back deep within the flames, almost wishing Godric would leave. I loved the man, but I needed a moment to myself, so I could say goodbye to the love of my life, the memories I had held onto so tightly for so long.
"It's dangerous for you to be alone at night." Godric warned. "I didn't want to scare you before, but I have a feeling that invading Louisiana wasn't entirely decided upon the fact that Sophie-Anne was weakened."
I frowned, glancing back at Godric. "What do you mean?"
Godric sighed as he ran a hand through his short hair. "I mean that the most powerful and rare being in the world happens to be residing here in Louisiana. Not to mention, living with the second most powerful and rare being in the world."
My eyes grew wide. "You think these vampires, they want Sookie and I?"
"We don't know that for sure, but considering vampires attacked you during your search for me, I would assume that is the case, yes." Godric nodded slowly. "You and Sookie...you're very rare beings. The Fae were once very strong, but in the last thousand years, their numbers have become less and less. It's very rare for a Fae to be in this world, and even rarer for there to be a part Fae. And you...you weren't supposed to exist, not to many creatures, not after over a thousand years of being lost. You have to know just how lucrative it would be for these vampires to have Sookie and you at their disposal."
"But it's not like even if they did invade, that Sookie and I would willingly use our powers for them. Sookie barely even knows how to use her powers." I pointed out.
"They haven't exactly given us a reason to believe that they would care about anyone's free will, have they?" Godric gave me a long look. "To them, I'm not alive. I was supposed to die in that bombing. Eric is gone, and they believe that he no longer holds a claim over you because of that. They're going to attack now that there is no one left to protect the state, and most importantly, no one left to protect you."
"That's why they bombed New Orleans when they did, to make sure you would die." I crossed my arms as I frowned deeply. "That's why they waited until now, isn't it? Eric is out of the picture, you're supposedly dead. They took out every other sheriff that could get in their way. They expect all the other vampires to bow down before them, to just accept this or die. And Sookie and I, they believe we no longer have protection anymore and think it'll be easy to snatch us up."
"And that is exactly why you need to be careful." Godric nodded.
"Great, because I haven't had enough trouble in my life, I need to add this to it. Why can't everyone just leave me alone?" I kicked at the dirt beneath my feet, tired of the life threatening situations I've been thrown into. "Sometimes I wished I died in that car crash with my parents."
"Why would you say such a thing?" Godric frowned, turning his body entirely towards me.
"Because then none of this would ever happen. I would never have found out about my telekinesis, which never would have led me to finding out about being the Phoenix. I would have been dead and in heaven right now with my parents, not stuck here in this hell hole."
"Elizabeth..." Godric reached out to me.
I stepped away however, his hand falling back to his side.
"I'm in the middle of something, Godric." I stared into the flames that had only surged as my mood changed.
"What are you doing? This will only attract trouble." Godric glanced around us, as if worried someone was just going to pop out at us at any moment.
"I'll be fine." I knelt down, grabbing onto the shirt I had discovered not too long ago in my belongings Maggie had sent me. It still smelt like Eric, it almost felt like him too. I tossed it into the fire, the flames raging as I did so. I stood back up, watching as the fabric was burnt to a crisp, nothing left of it to remind me of the times I had felt Eric's arms around me, holding me gingerly.
"This is how you plan to cut him out? By erasing your memories of him?" Godric questioned as I tossed item after item into the fire, ridding myself of anything that might remind me of Eric in any way. "I'm not sure this is healthy, Elizabeth."
"Holding onto Eric isn't healthy, Godric. I told you I was done with him. I told you that, and I told Eric that. So this is what I'm doing." I shrugged as the emotions began to rise. It was still hard. No matter how much Eric had hurt me, knowing that we would never be together, that I was cutting him out of my life forever, it was still hard. But it was a hardship that I had to endure. Because the pain of holding onto him was stronger than the pain of saying goodbye.
"This pains you, I can feel it." Godric laid a hand on my shoulder, despite my attempt to shove it away. "Why are you doing this to yourself? You're crying."
I quickly wiped away the tear that had slid down my cheeks. "One tear, Godric, it's one tear. I need to do this."
"No you don't. You and Eric, you can still be together, you can still be happy."
"No we can't, Godric." I snapped, turning towards him. "We can't be happy, he won't allow it. So I'm doing whatever it is that I can to stop this pain. I can't live like this, Godric. I can't wait around hoping he'll change his mind. Eric is what's wrong in my life; he's what's caused all my misery. So I'm changing that. I'm taking charge of my life for the first time."
"But you still love him, I know you do. This is hurting you. You can still keep his memories and let him go. You don't need to cut him out."
"Yes I do. And I thought you of all people would understand." I looked away, my long hair falling into my face.
"Kyra died, Elizabeth. She died. I didn't have a choice. I lost her without having the chance to fight for her."
"That's just it, Godric. Eric did have a choice. And so do I. He decided that he loved me, but couldn't be with me. So I'm deciding to be happy, to be free of him." I shrugged his hand off my shoulder. "And I'd like to do that in peace if you don't mind."
"Elizabeth..."
"No Godric, no matter what you say or do, it's not going to change anything. So please, just leave." I sighed, exhaustion washing over me. I just wanted to get this done, to be rid of Eric forever so I could crawl into bed and pretend the last few years never happened.
"Alright, I'll leave. But I'll be watching over you, Elizabeth. I always will, even when you want to hate me, or never want to see me; I will be in the shadows, ensuring your safety." He dipped down, brushing back my hair and pressing his cool lips against my cheek. "I hope you find what you're looking for."
And just like that, he was gone. I sighed as I gazed around the clearing, as if expecting him to still be there. But he wasn't. I could still feel his presence, but I couldn't find a single trace of the vampire. And honestly, I was alright with that. Godric could watch over me for as long as he'd life, and I'd be perfectly alright with that. He was my best friend, the closest person in my life. I would always want him, always need him. I just needed to do this by myself, to find the peace I've been searching for for so long.
As I tossed the last item into the flames, another tear slid down my cheek. I didn't brush it away however. It was a reminder of the pain Eric had caused me, a reminder I would not soon forget.
"Goodbye, Eric." I whispered before the flames suddenly just disappeared, leaving me completely in the dark.
"She's in pain." Eric muttered as Godric joined him within the trees lining the backyard, hidden from the brunette's view as she extinguished the fire she had created and slowly trekked back into the house.
"How would you know?" Godric gazed up at his child. "I thought you closed your bond off to her."
"I opened it partially." Eric answered with a sigh, running a hand through his slicked back hair. "I cannot keep her safe if I don't know when she's in trouble."
"Do you not fear that she could feel you, that she'll know your still here?" Godric wondered worriedly. "It will only break her further to be able to feel your presence."
"She shouldn't be able to." Eric shook his head.
"She still could. She is extraordinary after all." Godric gazed through the tree branches, watching as the light went on in Ellie's room for a moment before flashing back off. "She's cutting you out of her life entirely, Eric. Do you not care about that?"
"Of course I do." Eric surprised him by saying, his long arms crossing over his chest.
"Then why are you doing this?" his maker sighed. "If you care that she is erasing your memories, ripping you right out of her life, then why are you torturing yourself like this?"
"I cannot be with her, Godric. You know that." Eric frowned.
"That's just the thing, Eric, I don't know that." Godric shook his head. "One minute you tell me that you love her, and the next, you don't care. Which is it, Eric? Do you care or not? Have you ever loved her or was this just about the conquest?"
Eric didn't answer, and instead just glared at the spot the blazing fire had once been. The charred items were lying in a pile, the wind gently sweeping the ashes away. He couldn't answer the question, because he knew what the answer would be. Of course he loved Ellie. He hadn't known he could ever fall in love. He didn't think it was possible for a vampire, and himself, to have such emotions. But he fell for that damn girl, and now he had to live with the consequences. He could have allowed himself to love her for eternity. They could have been happy and he wouldn't have cared. But then she had to die in his arms. She had to leave him for those long and treacherous two weeks, and then everything had changed. How could he love her when she could be taken from him so easily? It hadn't been magic or anything supernatural that had killed her. It had been by a manmade object. She had been stabbed, her blood had flowed from her body, and he hadn't been able to stop it at all. He was supposed to protect her, keep her safe, and he hadn't done that. He had let her die in his very arms and he lost her.
He became a mess once she had died. He became someone he never wanted to become. And that scared him. How could one little girl change him so quickly. He was ready to give her the world, to end his just so she could live. He was a vampire, and yet he would have freely loved her, given himself entirely to her willingly. By his father's standards so long ago, that was weakness. And by his maker's standards from not so long ago, that was allowing himself to be at the mercy of his emotions, and that was not to be tolerated.
But worst of all, the pain of losing her, it was too much.
He couldn't go through that again. He couldn't have cared less about the vampire he had become. He was too scared of losing her. He had lost her now, but he had done so on his own terms. He was the one ending it, halting their relationship. It was all so he wouldn't feel the pain of watching her die in his arms, of watching the light leave her eyes. That had been a horrid day, one that he still had nightmares over. He would never stop loving Ellie, no matter how hard he desperately tried. But he could save himself from feeling that gut wrenching pain. He could do something about that.
And he was.
"You're acting like a coward." Godric accused with a hardened expression.
"I'm not a..." Eric turned on his maker, his fangs extending with a click.
"You are." Godric cut him off with a sharp look. "You are acting like a coward in every possible way."
"You taught me to not be weak; to not let myself be weakened by my emotions." Eric argued.
"And I had been scared to do so myself. But I learned that emotions are not a weakness. We should be embracing them, not shoving them away." Godric shook his head. "There is no shame in love, Eric. And there is no shame in fearing loss."
"I cannot fear anything. I'm a Viking; I'm over a thousand years old. I cannot fear losing her. It's a sign of weakness and I won't allow it!" Eric growled.
"And for that, you are a coward. You're losing her forever because you're afraid of something that may never happen. You and Elizabeth could be happy for an eternity, but you've lost that because you're afraid that you'll lose her. And I understand the pain, Eric. I understand that better than anyone. But you need to embrace that pain, to embrace that fear and just love her. Because one day, you're going to realize your mistake and she will no longer be here waiting for you. And then you'll both be unhappy for the rest of your lives." Godric no longer had any patience for his child. He turned his back to his progeny as he glanced back at him over his shoulder. "You had your chance, your second chance with her. And you lost it just as quickly. I hope you realize what you've done, Eric. Because there's no going back now."
Eric watched as Godric took to the skies, not wasting a moment getting away from him. He sighed, running his hand down his exhausted face as he tried not to let what Godric preached affect him. But it had. It was all beginning to sink in now. He had lost her. He had truly lost her, and that had been his decision. he should have been relieved, to know that he would not find himself weak, that he would never have to feel that pain of losing her again. But he wasn't relieved. He wasn't happy. He only felt sickened and distraught.
And that was not what Eric had been expecting at all.
"I expected you to be gone by now, unless the rumours of your leave are untrue." An unexpected, yet sadly familiar, voice spoke from behind Eric.
Eric narrowed his eyes as he twisted around, only to find Bill Compton standing before him, leaning against a tree with his hands stuffed into his ridiculous pant pockets.
"I thought I ordered you to leave my area and to never return." Eric shot at him, not pleased at all to see Bill back in Louisiana. He would only stir up more trouble, more drama. And that was the last thing they all needed right now.
"You're no longer Sheriff." Bill pointed out with a shrug. "In fact, there is no Sheriff, not officially. Though I swore I could have heard Godric and you speaking. Isn't he supposed to be dead?"
"He is." Eric answered without hesitation. "He is...he is no longer with us any longer. He met the true death."
"I apologize for your loss. I know how...painful it can be."
Eric raised an eyebrow. "You weren't close to your maker. In fact, don't I recall hearing that you tried to set her on fire?"
"Lorena and I were never close, but the pain of losing a maker is still unbearable." Bill frowned.
Eric didn't say a word, his eyes boring into Bill's, trying to find the reason the younger vampire had returned to Bon Temps. Had it been because of the blonde telepath? But no, Bill was ready to hand her over to whoever bid the highest price. He had hardly even cared about Sookie, despite what he had told her over and over again before he had been ordered out of the area. And now he was back. What trouble could he possibly be bringing with him? Was he here for Sookie for another bidder? Or was he here to try and take his Phoenix? Eric would not forget that Bill was so close to handing Ellie to Russell without a second thought. Bill would do whatever it took to achieve the power he sought out, even if it meant handing innocent women over to those who sought to use their powers till the last drop of their blood.
"What are you doing here, William?" Eric questioned.
"I was told there was no longer a Sheriff and I returned home." Bill explained just as quickly as Eric had told him Godric was no longer alive. That didn't sit well with Eric. It was as if Bill had rehearsed everything he was saying.
"And what are you doing here exactly."
Bill's gaze fell to the house barely viewable beyond the trees they stood within before quickly resting his gaze back on Eric. Eric didn't miss the look on the younger vampire's face however, and that only caused his worry to grow. Bill was here for a reason, and it wasn't simply to return to his ancestral home. He had used that excuse once before, only for there to be ulterior motives. Eric wasn't stupid enough to believe he had returned to this shit hole just for fun. There was a reason, one that Eric was determined to find out.
"I noticed you were here and I wondered when you were leaving. You are leaving, are you not?" Bill questioned, raising an eyebrow.
"I am." Eric answered, his eyes narrowing further. "Tonight in fact."
"And where will you find yourself?"
"That is privileged information, William." Eric scowled at Bill's failed attempt to question him and his supposed whereabouts.
"Of course, I apologize." Bill nodded.
"She is no longer available." Eric made a point to inform Bill. "Ms. Stackhouse has not been alone for many months now."
"So I've heard. That mutt...Sam Merlotte, now owns her heart." There was a flash of anger in Bill's eyes, but it had vanished as quickly as it had appeared. "I was merely ensuring that she was alright. I do care for her, Eric, despite what you may believe."
"You were about to hand her, and my human, over to Russell." Eric reminded him. "I do not believe for one moment that you care about the telepath."
"I was having doubts. I loved her, eventually." Bill was lying, Eric could see right through his facade. "I wouldn't have...I was hoping that if I had given Russell Ellie then he would have..."
"Then he would have what?" Eric snapped, baring his fangs at Bill. "That he would have decided that your little telepath wasn't worth his time? Then you would have been able to sell her off to the next highest bidder? What were you planning on doing after you gave away my Phoenix?"
"I fell in love with Sookie, I expect you to understand why I would have done anything to keep her safe. Even if it required sacrificing others." Bill looked away.
"Sacrificing an innocent girl who you had no claim over." Eric wasn't able to control himself as he flashed before Bill, grabbing him by the neck and throwing me into the tree opposite of them. Bill slammed hard into the trunk of the tree, a groan emitting from the vampire a he fought to stay steadied on his feet. "That is what you planned to do? Did you not fear that your telepath would have despised you for this? She wouldn't have loved you once she knew the truth."
"She wouldn't have known." Bill shook his head as he braced himself. "I was close, I was so close."
"Close to what?" Eric demanded.
"To having her completely, to finalizing the bond. Once she was completely mine, I could have..."
"You could have what?" Eric was before him again, forcing him up against the tree with his hand pressing into his throat, ready to just snap his head right off of his body. "I may not have claim to Sookie Stackhouse, but she is Ellie's friend, and I refuse to allow you to touch either one of them, do I make myself clear?"
"You have no authority here, Eric." Bill spat, using what strength he had to shove Eric away. "You're no longer Sheriff. Godric is dead. Sookie is still mine."
"You lost that claim when you left. Whatever reason you are here, forget it. I will not allow any harm to come to any of them."
"But you will not be here." Bill reminded him. "You are leaving tonight. How do you expect to protect them when you are not here? Aren't you aware of what is coming?"
"Of course I am. The real question i, how are you aware of it?" Eric hissed. "Leave William. Leave Louisiana and do not come back. Or else I won't hesitate to rip your head off."
"I'll leave for tonight." Bill held his hands up. "But do not expect me to leave my home, Eric. This was my home long before you ever came here, before your precious little Phoenix came around. Sookie is mine, remember, I still hold my claim on her. Once you are gone, I will reclaim what is rightfully mine."
"I will ensure that you are staked to the true death." Eric threatened with a low growl.
"We'll see about that." Bill slowly began retreating. "Goodbye Eric, I hope we do not meet again."
Eric wanted to lunge at him, but fought away the urge to create bloodshed and instead only watched as Bill disappeared into the trees. He listened closely, making sure Bill had left the area before he dug out his phone, pressing in the familiar number.
"We have a problem."