This was supposed to be posted yesterday, but I was out for the entire day, so I suppose I'll just have to post it a day late. How sad.

First things first: I will reply to And here comes the chocobunny, even though I know you've said previously that I don't need to. ;P I agree that Obito is awesome, but sadly, we don't get to find out enough about him for me to feel good about making a proper fic for him. I'd hate to start writing and then only get 2 or 3 pages...it was okay for Shino, because he's not quite as awesome as Obito (in my mind, at least) and so it didn't matter as much. XD I'm glad you decided to read this fic, though! I always enjoy reading your enthusiastic reviews

So I was going to make a chapter for Sakura on March 28th, but I decided that I don't like her enough to do that. Honestly, I love making fun of her, but I don't even enough material to do an entire chapter of Sakura bashing, as much as I wish I did. So instead, I decided to skip her and go straight to Hidan. Yes, that's right, everybody look out. It's Hidan's birthday today, April 2nd. However, if you want what would have been Sakura's chapter, it'll be in the A/N at the end of this one.

This is a sort of more elaborate form of an idea that popped into my head the other day, while re-watching the whole "Pein attacks Konoha" arc...When I had the thought initially, it wasn't centered around anyone in particular, but I decided to use it for Hidan since he's the next person from the Akatsuki to need a fic, and I want to use it before I forget about it. So basically, this is what happened the day Hidan joined the Akatsuki. I'm not entirely sure if Orochimaru was still there when Hidan joined, but since it says that Hidan was the second to last to join, I'm going to assume that means it was after Orochi left, and so therefore I won't involve him.

Little bit of background info on Hidan (some of which will be mentioned in the fic, but I figured I'd say it here anyway): He was from Yugakure (Hidden Hot Springs Village), but then got annoyed when it turned into more of a tourist site than a shinobi village, and so killed his neighbours and then left. It was after this that he became Jashinist, and then once he gained immortality from the religion, he (somehow) met Kakuzu, who he viewed as a pioneer in immortality, and he joined the Akatsuki because of this. Or something like that. XP All it says is that he "joined Akatsuki after seeing Kakuzu" so I assume that it was because of their meeting. Somehow. Anyway, here goes!

Chapter 7

Hidan

Hidan walked into a large cavern, where eight other figures stood, looking rather menacing. He scowled at each of them in turn. "What the hell are you all staring at?" he demanded.

"So you found the place," Kakuzu said. "What a shame. I was hoping you'd get lost."

"Hidan of Yugakure," Pein said, completely ignoring both Hidan and Kakuzu. "You wish to join us, correct?"

Hidan rolled his eyes. "Well, duh. Why else would I be here?"

"What makes you think you qualify to be a member of Akatsuki?" Pein continued.

"Did you not hear of how I killed all my neighbours?" Hidan asked. "Not to mention all the crapload of other people I've killed because of my religion."

"That's no big deal, though," Kisame said. "All of us here have killed lots of people, though I doubt anyone can beat Itachi's record." He grinned at his partner, whose face remained expressionless.

"So, what, is there some kind of entrance test or something?" Hidan asked sarcastically. If someone looked very, very closely at Pein's face just then, they might have seen a very, very slight smirk appear and then disappear just as quickly.

"I suppose you could call it that," he said mysteriously. "Konan will show you where to go, and the others will come along. I won't be taking part in it."

Konan looked at Pein in surprise. "You won't?" she said. "But this is your favourite part of introducing new members, why would you choose to miss it?"

"I have things to do," he replied. "Mostly, I need to find where I put the ring I was going to give Hidan."

Konan sighed. "Okay, then." Pein poofed away, then Konan turned and looked at Hidan. "Follow me."

"Why in the hell would I listen to some stupid bitch like you?" Hidan snapped. "I'm not going anywhere." In an instant, his entire body was bound by paper, aside from his head.

"Three things you will very quickly learn," Konan said, not moving an inch. "One is that Pein is your leader, and anything he says goes. Two is that whenever Pein is not around, I am in charge. And three...none of us in this organization will tolerate being insulted. Got that?"

Hidan glared at her. "Yeah, yeah, sure," he said. "Just let me out of this."

Konan stared at him a while longer, then released him and turned. "Now follow me, everybody." The entire group obediently followed Konan up a flight of stairs which Hidan hadn't noticed before. The stairs led to a hallway with many closed doors, and Konan led them to the room at the very end of the hall. She opened the door, and Hidan had to rub his eyes a few times to make sure he was seeing it right.

The first thing he saw was pink. Pink, frilly, lacy, girly décor. It was a bedroom that could only be described as that of a very girly teenage girl, with pink and red hearts everywhere. Even the bed was heart-shaped. "Where...in the hell...are we...?" Hidan asked in shock.

Deidara giggled. "You like it?" he asked. "It's my room."

"Why are we here?" Hidan asked, clearly not impressed.

"Your initiation test," Konan replied, walking over to a nightstand which was covered in hundreds of bottles of nailpolish, in every colour imaginable. There was even some neon green there. "Every Akatsuki member has a different colour of nailpolish, and if you're truly serious about joining us, then you've got to pick one too."

Hidan was silent for a long moment. "What's the catch?"

Konan smirked slightly. "Well, for one, you have to pick a colour that none of us already wear. And for two...you've got to let us put it on you. But that's not all. It's not just the nailpolish, this is a full-blown teenage slumber party, complete with gossip about boys and hair braiding and even a bit of dressup and a short tea party, just because. Oh, and of course, there's also the pillow fight."

"That's my favourite part," Deidara proclaimed.

Hidan stared at them all with wide eyes. "You're all insane," he said simply. "Totally and completely insane."

"Do you still want to join?" Konan asked, her smirk widening.

Hidan thought about it for a moment, then sighed. "Alright, what are my nailpolish choices?"

Deidara giggled and jumped up and down, clapping his hands. "Yay! Now, let me help you pick something-"

"NO!" Hidan exclaimed. "If I've gotta do this, then I'm picking the colour!"

"Just remember that it can't be the same as what any of us are wearing," Konan reminded him. "If you want, you can choose a colour for your fingernails and a different one for your toes. That's what Zetsu did; he chose pink for his fingers and blue for his toes."

"We couldn't agree," Zetsu's black half explained.

"He wanted blue and I wanted pink," the white half continued, "so we compromised."

"Probably the only thing we'll ever compromise on," the black half murmured. The white half pretended not to hear that.

"As you can see," Konan went on, as if Zetsu hadn't said anything, "I am wearing orange, Kakuzu is wearing dark green, Itachi has purple, Kisame has dark blue, Deidara has black, and if Sasori weren't hiding in that ugly hunk of wood, you'd see that he has teal."

"Hey, don't diss Hiruko," Sasori said, glaring at Konan. "This is probably one of the best puppets I've got for defense."

"You'll never get a date from anyone if you don't show people your 'real' self every once in a while," Konan pointed out.

"We haven't gotten to that part of the slumber party yet," Sasori said, "so don't even start."

Konan rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to Hidan. "If Pein were with us, you'd see that he has red nailpolish. You may choose a different shade of any of the colours we have, or a completely different one. But choose quickly; we won't wait around forever."

"I'll just take dark purple," Hidan muttered. "It looks like it's the closest to black that isn't taken already."

"Alright, sit on the bed," Konan commanded. "Itachi, go get the bowls of water. Sasori, go get the towels. Kisame, nail clippers and file. Deidara, find the best hair accessories you can. Kakuzu...just go stand in the corner or something. Or go see if Pein wants any help searching for the ring. And Zetsu...oh, looks like he disappeared already. Kakuzu, why don't you go look for Zetsu."

Kakuzu glared, but left. Everyone else did as they were told, then came back. Konan took the bowls of water and placed two on the floor for Hidan's feet and two on either side of him for his hands. "Itachi and Kisame, take care of his feet. Sasori, take his left hand. I'll take his right, and Deidara, you're in charge of doing his hair." Once again, the others did as they were told, and Sasori reluctantly got out of his puppet in order to do his job better. Hidan saw that he did, indeed, have teal nailpolish. He jumped when he felt Itachi and Kisame touch his feet.

"Hey!" Hidan exclaimed. "Careful with my feet! They're sensitive!"

"We'll be gentle," Itachi promised, and he and Kisame both took one of Hidan's feet and plunged them into the warm water. Konan and Sasori did the same with his hands, while Deidara sat behind him and started doing his hair. Hidan protested and struggled for the first while, then eventually he shut up and let himself enjoy the pampering. His hands and feet were getting massaged, his finger and toenails were clipped, and the feeling of Deidara's fingers running through his hair was actually quite soothing. I see why teenage girls like this kind of thing, he thought idly.

When it came time to paint, Hidan discovered that Deidara actually had four of every colour, for this exact purpose. Each of the four shinobi who had been working on Hidan's hands and feet had their own bottle of nailpolish to use, that way it was much more efficient. While Itachi, Kisame, Konan, and Sasori painted, the whole group chatted about boys, just as Konan had said they would.

"I met a really cute one the other day," Deidara announced. "while I was on the road to search for the Kyuubi."

"Oh?" Konan said in interest. "Do tell." Itachi looked up, a scowl on his face, though he remained silent.

"Well, he was very pale," Deidara began, "and had such deep black eyes...his hair was soooo black, though the back of it kinda looked like a duck's ass..."

"Stay away from that one," Itachi warned, still scowling.

Deidara looked at him in surprise. "What, you're not worried that I'll dump you for him, are you? Because you know I'd never do that."

"No, it's not that...that's my little brother you just described."

At once, all eyes turned to Itachi in shock. "I thought you killed your whole clan," Sasori said.

"Apparently not," Kisame said.

"Why did you never tell me you had a brother?" Deidara demanded. "I thought we weren't going to keep secrets from each other!"

"It never came up in conversation," Itachi said simply, shrugging. "And it's not my fault that you all assumed I killed everyone, because I certainly never said I did."

There was a long pause as everyone processed those words. "Hey...he's right," Sasori noted.

"In any case," Konan said, turning her attention back to Hidan's nails, "it doesn't matter right now. We should probably hurry; Pein should be back soon with the ring, and he'll expect for us to have finished."

"But we haven't even gotten to have the pillow fight!" Deidara protested. "I was looking forward to it..."

"I'm sorry," Konan said. "Maybe another time."

The others all groaned, and then the door opened. Pein was standing there, something in his hand. "Are you done yet?" he asked.

Konan checked each of Hidan's hands and feet, carefully touching the nails to see if they were dry. "Yes, we're done," she announced. Pein walked over.

"Good," he said. "Hidan, since you've joined us so late, I'm afraid you don't have a choice what finger this ring will go on, as there's only one position remaining. Give me your left hand."

Hidan held up his left hand, which was much softer and smoother than it had been in years. Pein took it and slid a ring onto Hidan's index finger, then released his hand. "There. You are now officially a member of Akatsuki."

Hidan looked at his new ring. It was orange, and bore the kanji for "san" - or "three". He looked up. "I'm officially a member now?" he repeated.

"That's what I just said," Pein nodded. Hidan grinned.

"Awesome. So when do I get to start killing people?"

"Tomorrow," Pein replied. "For now, I will show you to your room and then you will rest. Konan will wake you when it's time to leave."

"Wait!" Hidan exclaimed. "You guys all have partners, right? Who do I get to work with?"

"Well, currently, the only one without a partner is Kakuzu, so you'll just have to deal with him. Be warned, though; he has a tendency to kill his partners."

Hidan laughed. "I'd love to see him try that on me," he said. "I am immortal!"

Pein and Konan shared a glance, and both knew they were thinking the same thing; Maybe he fits in here better than we originally thought.

End

Yeah, so it was an okay length, I suppose. Not as short as Shino's, yet not quite as long as Sasuke's will be...it's still nowhere near done, and it's on page 8. XP Now, as promised, here is what would have been Sakura's chapter:

It was Sakura's birthday, so she decided to go attempt to make out with Sasuke. Sasuke blew her up with a huge bazooka thingy before she even got the chance. Naruto rejoiced, and then he and Sasuke had fun. The end.

See? That's why I didn't devote an entire chapter to her. Lol. Please review, even though this is a day late! Next chapter is May 1st!