A/N: ok so it's been eight years since James' chapter and now it's time for some Kendall Angst! The next chapter is going to be a continuation of where his leaves off and then the story's going to pick up with all four of the boys. And without further ado, here's chapter four :D

Chapter Four: Kendall

'It hurts' he thought miserably, squeezing his eyes shut, trying to block out the agonizing burning pain that filled his body. 'Please just stop, please. It hurts so bad'

But he didn't stop. He never stopped. That's why Kendall stopped begging for him to stop after a while. It wasn't like he would listen anyway. Every now and again he would let out a cry of pain but it was like he didn't even hear it. Did he just not care that he was causing his stepson so much pain?

When it finally ended and he pulled out of him, Peter rolled him over so he was laying on his back. The sixteen year old trembled under his gaze and a few tears leaked out of his eyes. He wanted to tell him to get off of him, to leave him alone… but he just couldn't find the words. He wasn't sure if it was out of fear or the fact that was slowly giving up on talking because nobody listened anyway, but he couldn't find the words he wanted to say and it was killing him. Peter leaned down close to him and Kendall shrunk back into the sheets, trying to scurry away until the elder man stopped him by running his fingers through his hair. Kendall let out a shaky breath and raised his hands to push him off but Peter moved back before he could even make contact. "You were so good tonight." the man breathed in his ear, making Kendall squirm. He didn't want to hear this. He didn't want his stepfather to tell him he was good in bed- that was sick and disturbing. Kendall whimpered and writhed around under his step dad's grasp; the sadistic man had him pinned down to the bed. Peter placed his mouth on Kendall's, giving him a kiss and Kendall felt his stomach churn. He wanted to throw up right now, even worse than before.

Peter finally climbed off of him and started out of the room. Kendall pulled the blanket all the way up to his chin, covering his naked body. Still shaking and crying, he glanced at the door, making sure Peter was really gone. When he was sure he was, he finally breathed a sigh of relief, even though he didn't feel at all relieved. The memories still lingered in his mind no matter what he did.

It all started when he younger. He never knew his father; he left when he was too young to form any memories of him. For a while it was just him and his mother, who wasn't all too kind to him. Jennifer Knight had a more than hard time dealing with her husband leaving her. Sure they were young and they had a baby, but she thought he loved her. Turns out she was wrong, since he did leave and she was left to raise a two year old son by herself. She had no clue what she was doing and eventually turned to alcohol for support. She spent most of her nights completely hammered, not remembering a single thing the next day. But Kendall remembered. He remember how his mother touched him in a way that mothers shouldn't touch their children. It sickened him every time he thought about it.

Kendall was ten when his mom met Peter and at first he thought it was a blessing in disguise. When she was with him she seemed happier, and she even stopped drinking. But when he moved in, things took a toll for the worse. Peter decided to make Kendall his little play thing. It started off with touching, just like his mom had done for him but after a while, it resorted to just plain sexual abuse.

The first time Peter raped Kendall, he was eleven. He never thought he could experience a kind of pain like that. And it didn't just hurt- it burned. It burned with agony and the memory was burned in his mind.

Peter also had a daughter- Kendall's step sister Katie. To Peter and Jen, she was unspoiled perfection. She could get away with everything and anything she did was Kendall's fault, which usually left him being punished by Peter.

Now at sixteen, Kendall's life wasn't much different now. He was still being abused by his stepfather; the only thing different now was that he did a lot less talking than be did when he was eleven. When he was younger he tried telling his mom about what Peter did to him, but she just wouldn't have it. "Peter's so good to us." she would tell him. "He got us a better house, more money. He's the father you never had. And he makes me so happy. Let's not ruin that Kendall." Kendall's heart broke when his mom told him that. He tried to tell Katie, but she refused to believe anything bad about her father. "You were just getting what you deserved." she told him.

He truly had nobody on his side.

Although his abuse wasn't everyday, Kendall hurt everyday. He was in physical and mental agony and the worst part was that nobody cared. And all he wanted was to be loved.

After a couple of minutes passed and Kendall felt a little better than before (by 'better' he meant, able to walk without wanting to cry) he wrapped the blanket around his body and got out of Peter's bed. He peeked his head out into the hallway and looked around, making sure that nobody was out there, and when the coast was cleared he ran into the bathroom and locked the door. Just to be safe, he moved the clothes hamper in front of it to work as a block. He dropped the blanket to the floor and stared at himself in the mirror for a moment. He looked down at his hips and gingerly touched at them. They were covered in pressure marks, bruises, and hand shaped prints from when Peter forced him down on the bed. Kendall shook his head, not wanting to think about it anymore and got into the shower, turning the warm spray of water onto himself. He grabbed the soap and started to scrub himself. Desperate to feel clean again, he rubbed his skin raw. After almost an hour, Kendall ceased his excessive cleaning and just stood there, watching as soap, blood, water, and tears all flowed down the drain. Dejected, Kendall stepped out of the shower and wrapped himself in a towel. Physically, he was clean but mentally, he really wasn't. He never was.

Kendall was walking down the hallway, still donning nothing but the towel around his waist, when he felt a hand on his shoulder. The blonde boy spun around in shock, his eyes wide, and he took a few steps back. That was the worst part about everything he had been though- he couldn't stand being touched by anyone. It just freaked him out.

"Kendall," Peter said to him. "Your mom and I are going out for a couple of hours, ok? We'll be back later." Kendall couldn't say anything. He just let out ragged, nervous breaths. "You hear me, boy?" Peter took a step towards him and Kendall let out a whimper, nodding rapidly. "Alright then. See you later." Peter went downstairs and Kendall went into his bedroom.

He leaned against the door, trying to control his breathing. 'Just relax. He's leaving. It's ok now' he told himself. Kendall ran a hand through his hair and proceeded to get dressed. After putting on his favorite plaid shirt, a pair of jeans, Vans, and his favorite gray beanie, he went outside to go get the mail, since nobody else probably did. Once he stepped outside, he noticed a colorful piece of paper on the ground. Curiously, he picked it up and looked it over. The paper turned out to be an advertisement of sorts, asking for donations to a placed called St. Vincent's. Kendall turned the paper over and looked over the back of it, reading about how St. Vincent's had been helping children who couldn't stay in their homes or didn't have parents to take care of them for years. Currently, it was run three people: Kelly Wainwright, Gustavo Rocque, and Dr. Tara Collins. Anyone who needed help was allowed there, the paper said.

And that's how Kendall got the idea.

Kendall looked up from the paper once more, staring at the building before him. It looked just like it did in the picture. His decision was made; this was where he had to be. Adjusting the back pack on his back, he opened the door of St. Vincent's and walked inside. He looked around, seeing kids running around, playing together. Sitting on the staircase were three boys who looked to be his age. They all looked at him when he walked in and Kendal lowered his head.

"Hi!" a cheerful voice said, causing Kendall took look up. He recognized her as Kelly Wainwright, the same girl on the paper he was currently clutching in his hands. "My name is Kelly, I help run things here at St. Vincent's. How can I help you?" Kendall opened his mouth, he wanted to tell Kelly everything he was going through but he couldn't get the words out. Kelly's smile faded. "Sweetheart, is everything ok?" she reached out to touch him and Kendal backed away from her, looking even more nervous than before. "Can you tell me what's wrong?" Kelly asked gently.

Kendall licked his lips, then swallowed. "It hurts." he said in a quiet voice that Kelly had to strain to hear. "He hurts me… I can't stay there anymore."

Kelly nodded. "Ok, honey, just come with me and we'll work everything out."

"A-are you going to make me go back?" Kendall asked timidly before she could turn around to walk away.

Kelly looked at him, a sad look in her eyes. "No." she said finally. "I won't make you do anything you don't want to do."

And for the first time, Kendall truly felt at ease.

A/N: and now we have Kendall, the final addition to St. Vincent's. funny, he was also the last addition to BTR. Haha oh the irony. Ugh I used agony like 500 times in this ): But anyways, I hope you guys liked this chapter! (: