Chapter Three:
Dudley's Worst Nightmare
Life could not get any better for Dudley Dursley then it was now. Not only was he feasting on candy his mother had bought him after his return home from the hospital, but his cousin Harry was gone for the rest of the year at some freak school. His life could now proceed perfectly normal: normal mother, normal father, normal friends, normal house, normal school, and normal nonexistent relatives.
He began to gorge himself on some colorful salt-water toffees when he began to feel dizzy. With a thump he fell to the floor, everything growing around him. "Diddy-kins, are you alright?" called his mother from the kitchen. She walked out wearing her favorite white floral apron. "How is my sweet… Vernon! Vernon, come quick! There is a pig in the sitting room!"
Dudley began to look nervously around him. "Pig? Pig?" he tried to whimper, but it only came out as a squeal. Panicking he bounded over to the window on all fours too weak to stand and nearly fainted at the sight of his reflection. He not only had a pigtail, but he was indeed a pig. His father burst into the room carrying Dudley's favorite flavor of ice cream.
"What? Ahh! Where did that-that thing come from?" roared his father. Thundering over to where Dudley stood, his father grabbed him by his snout and his tail. "I'm taking it to the zoo. If they don't want it, I'm taking it to the butcher's." Dudley squealed in terror as his father threw him into the back trunk. Next thing he knew, he was behind a large glass wall, children gawking at him. He backed away from them, terrified.
"Why's there a pig in the zoo, mommy," whined a pudgy little girl. "I want to see the tigers, not some stupid pig." She began knocking on the glass loudly trying to get Dudley to look up at her.
"Look, it's a pig in the zoo," said a strange voice. He looked up and saw a ginger-haired boy who Dudley could have sworn he had seen somewhere before. There was another boy who looked exactly like the first standing next to him.
"I don't know, Gred. Pigs are supposed to be on farms," replied the second.
'"Dudley Dursley, The-Boy-Who-Pigged,'" read the first off a plaque. "Resident of Number Four, Privet Drive, Surrey."
"Could have sworn I've heard the name somewhere. Hey, Gred! Our house is like a farm."
"Yeah, Forge! Maybe the pig will want to play with us there!"
"Let's take it home, farm boy," said the second boy with an evil smirk on his face. The two boys backed up and then charged at the glass. It shattered showering Dudley in little pieces. Seeing the twins in his pen, he began to run wildly around.
"Catch him, Forge!"
"I've got his tail! Get the cart!" And to Dudley's horror the first boy pulled a cart into his pen piled with several other ginger-haired children.
"Mush, Dudley! Mush!" shouted one child hitting him with a whip.
"Ron, don't hurt him," said an older boy pulling the whip out of the child's hand and throwing it into a nearby trashcan. "I want to keep him as a pet!"
"But he's going to be dinner. Mom said she wanted fresh pork," stated the oldest boy climbing into the front.
"From the market," interrupted a boy with glasses. "Plus, a pig can't logically pull all of us home."
"I don't think logical exists with Fred and George," declared the only girl.
"Yeah, Percy. Fred and I just aren't applicable to your rules of logic."
"First off, Bill and Charlie shouldn't be kids."
"Fred and I can't smash through glass unharmed."
"And George and I don't meet Dudley Dursley until our sixth year. See, no logic."
Dudley was soon pulling all seven children home, much to his dismay. A rather short, severe looking woman was waiting at the door. "What took you so long?" she asked.
"Had a bit of a problem hitching the pig to the cart," explained the oldest child jumping down from the cart. The woman guided Dudley into a pen and he squealed just wanting to be let out. He didn't want to die so young; he wanted to be Dudley again and to go home. Dudley was also starving.
"Mum, I don't want the pig to die," cried the boy who had thrown away the whip. "Can't we keep him as a pet?"
"You already have enough pets," stated the woman pointing to a shed where a cow was eating leaves from a tree.
"We want to play with Dudley," demanded one of the red head twins.
"Dudley? Who is Dudley?" questioned the woman.
"The pig," replied the other twin. "Can we play with him mum?"
"Alright, but don't get attached to it. We don't want him getting away before your father gets home," consented the woman.
"Yay!" shouted both ginger head twins. They hopped over the fence. "Come play with us, Dudley! Come play with us, Dudley!" Dudley squealed and ran around the pen with both twins in hot pursuit.
"Dudleyus Stopium!" hollered one twin brandishing a stick that Dudley knew must be a wand. He was going to be wizards' dinner, he realized terrified at what their cooking methods could be. He stopped, rooted to the spot and both twins climbed on his back.
"Go, Dudley! Be a bucking bronco!" bellowed one twin and Dudley ran about trying to throw both twins off. But he didn't notice the pole in front of him.
"Dudley! Look-"
Bang.
So that's Dudley. Maybe he'll finally learn to stop being a pig. Hope you all enjoyed the new chapter! Please review.