It was another boring day in glee club for Buffy Lopez. More crap about preparing for Sectionals and yada yada. It wasn't even December yet it was still cold.
"and our assignment is... feelings. We must sing a song about our true feelings" Mr Schue was explaining this week's assignment.
Buffy had an idea. She had a crush on her best friend Mary, so this was her chance to jump in.
"I already have a song" she told the class
"Go for it Buffy"
She sung Songbird by Fleetwood Mac. Everybody was touched. Even Charlie. The class clapped.
"Who was that song directed at?"
"Uh... Sam. But he left to San Jose"
"HE'S MINE BITCH!" Lily got angry
"NO HE'S MINE! WE'RE LONG DISTANCE DATING!" Kimmy shouted
"REALLY KIMMY? HE'S BEEN CHEATING ON YOU WITH ME!"
"OH SHUT UP BITCH!"
It turned into a hair-pulling, name-calling fight. Buffy just rolled her eyes.
"Uh... guys... Sam left. he can't hear your fight... so... he doesn't belong to either of you" was Charlie's attempt at breaking up the fight.
The girls continued to fight.
Buffy went to her meeting with the McKinley High Lesbians Club. To her surprise, there was Charlie.
"Hi loser"
Charlie rolled her eyes.
"What are you doing here?" Charlie asked
"I'm a lesbian. Duh!"
"Well I am too. It's nice to see you here"
"Who do you have a crush on?"
"Priya. What about you?"
"Mary"
The girls listened to the club leader, Lea Michaels. They asked questions until the meeting ended.
Buffy and Charlie were having a friendly chat.
"Well, I hope you come out to Mary"
"I dunno. Hey, you know what's funny? My cousin Santana's a lesbian"
"Really?"
"It must run in the blood, eh?"
"I guess"
"Well, I have to get going. See ya tomorrow"
"Well, bye"
It was Lachlan's turn to sing.
"Well, Mr Schue, I'd like to sing a song to Nikki. It's called Go Your Own Way. It was originally by Fleetwood Mac"
He started singing. Everybody was dancing.
"Well, Nikki, did you like? That's the last you'll ever hear from me"
Nikki rolled her eyes. She was too invested with Finn
"LAME!" Finn shouted. Liam wanted to punch Finn but, like last time he sung a song, he was too busy lovingly looking at Nikki. Lachlan just loved her too much.
"Well, Finn. I'd like to see your face when you dea..." Buffy tried defending Lachlan. But she was cut off by Finn
"Oh really, Santana? That's your best shot?"
"It's Buffy, you hypocrite"
"You don't even know what that means"
"I sure hell of a do"
The riot ended. Both performances so far had ended in a riot. Riot count: 2
"I have a song" Lily chirped
"Okay" Mr Schue said
"I'll need my friend Buffy to sing it with me"
They sung Jet Lag by Simple Plan.
"ONCE AGAIN, SAM'S MINE!" Kimmy shouted
"HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I SAID THIS, BITCH? HE'S FREAKING MINE!"
"I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU GO TO SAN JOSE AND MAKE OUT WITH HIM"
Another performance that had ended in a riot. Riot count: 3
Mr Schue gave New Directions a pep talk.
"I'm very disappointed" Mr Schue said, sternly
"We're sorry" Priya apologized
"It won't happen again" Fae assured Mr Schue
"But I have a song dedicated to Lachlan" Nikki chirped
"Sing it"
She sung Leave Me Alone by P!nk.
"DON'T SING THAT SONG TO LACHLAN!" Liam shouted. To Liam, Lachlan was a god.
"SHUT IT, PIPSQUEAK" Finn defended Nikki
"PIPSQUEAK? JUST BECAUSE I'M A FRESHMAN DOESN'T MEAN I'M A PIPSQUEAK"
"LEAVE HIM ALONE, IDIOT" Nick shouted at Finn
Another riot. Riot count: 4
After the fourth riot, three more riots happened. Buffy immediately said everybody was affected with "The Lopez Gene". Nobody knew what meant, but it had something to do with Buffy's fight-starting family.
"Guys, let's sing this song"
They sung We Are The World. Mr Schue loved it, though he didn't know that Nick, Lachlan and Liam were rolling their eyes during the performance.
Mr Schue clapped when it finished.
"Great job guys!" he cheered
"Mr Schue, with all this fighting, I'd like to have an opinion" Fae interrupted, "It's not cool. First the fight after Songbird, and the most recent fight that was after Rio's rendition of Hello, I Love You, I'd safely like to say that this assignment..." Mr Schue wanted to hear something positive, but instead her heard "absolutely sucked"