Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece, or else you'd know because there would be more crew relationships.
Summary: Luffy and a few others go to a pet shop on an island. All is fine just looking and not touching, until someone arrives to buy a pet. Can the partial Straw Hat crew save the animals?
Warnings: Light ZoLu, light swearing by a parrot, and violence
KittyLuffy: Please enjoy the exciting second chapter of Luffy Wants a Pet Edited Version!
Robin: Do not be so hasty to have them read. Explain it a little.
KittyLuffy: Okay, Robin. So, there were a few changes - a lot less than chapter one. Mainly, it's my love for word choice, but also minor positioning problems.
Robin: Such as?
KittyLuffy: Zoro put a hand on Luffy's shoulder, Luffy moved next to Usopp, Zoro's hand then let go.
Robin: Usopp didn't catch that? I thought he helped you write this one. Well, please enjoy this action-packed second chapter.
Luffy Wants a Pet Edited Version
Luffy gazed into the glass pet shop window, staring at all the funny items it had to offer. Chew toys and dog bones lined the walls while fake mice and scratching posts cluttered the squished aisle ways.
"What in the world are you looking at?" Zoro asked, sauntering over to see what his captain was ogling. Seeing it was a pet shop, he sweat-dropped and put a firm hand on Luffy's shoulder. "Now listen," the green-haired man started, "I know you want a pet but–" He was cut off by sparkling eyes and two more sets across the way.
"Can't we just go in and take a quick look?" Usopp asked like a child in front of a candy shop, "I think there's a lizard in that cage!"
"A lizard? Where? Where?" Luffy cried out in delight, wanting to stand next to his partner in crime.
"Yohohoho, I wonder if they have baby whales."
Zoro stared at the skeleton man who was not making the situation any better. The four of them had been sent into the small town to get supplies, not gawk at animals in cages. Besides, since it was a shop, everything had a price.
"Please Zoro?" Luffy whined, grabbing the hand still holding him in place, "I wanna see if they have bunnies or something. Maybe Nami wouldn't mind a bunny."
"Oh, she'll mind a bunny," Usopp and Zoro said in unison. Looking at one another, they nodded. Luffy plus a bunny would equal rabbit stew in no time. The worst part would be that Sanji wouldn't object to cooking it up and Luffy probably wouldn't notice what he was gulping down.
"Then not a bunny. Maybe the lizard." Usopp put his arms up in a cancellation X and shook his head. Luffy had finally gotten Zoro's strong hand off his shoulder and was able to cock his head to the side questioningly.
"If you get a pet, that lizard is mine! I saw it first." The Straw Hat captain frowned lightly before he bounded into the shop, following Brooke who was gaping at the sight of a family of mice. Zoro sighed and also went in, staring past the rows of animal products. Then, a wooden bin caught his eye and he headed to see what it was full of.
The other three 'oohed' and 'aahed' in front of the animal cages. They would only get a quick glance before the creature would scamper to hide, seeing Brooke's face as an obvious horror. They got to stare long and hard at a chinchilla that had fainted after hearing the skeleton man laugh.
"Yohohoho, they are so cute; not scary at all." Usopp nodded, also enjoying the fact the animals were soft and cuddly, so unlike the Cerberus and other crazy animals on Thriller Bark. Luffy gazed longingly at a parrot spitting out swear words and greetings. Weren't pirate captains supposed to have colorful birds on their shoulders?
He remembered when he was young and Ace read him picture books on winter nights. There was always some bearded guy with a peg leg, eye patch, and bird on his shoulder searching for buried treasure in the most stupid places ever. Sometimes a monkey replaced the winged animal, but Luffy didn't want a monkey. He was one.
As he stared at the bird, who was squawking "Good afternoon, sir", he imagined what it would be like to have a monkey as a pet. It could sit with him and eat bananas. Maybe he could teach it to juggle… but wait a second. If Luffy was a monkey and there was another monkey on the ship, would Zoro get confused? Would Zoro choose to love the furry animal instead of his captain? Luffy shook the terrible thought away and swore silently that if he were to get a pet, which he would someday, it would NOT be a monkey. Zoro was his and he was Zoro's, no other monkey or Roronoa was involved.
Zoro frowned as he finally got to the barrel he had seen when he had entered. Somehow, he had taken a 'shortcut' through a few other aisles, missing his goal completely. After doubling back and using more shortcuts, he found himself standing near his wished destination. Inching to the left with careful steps, he was happy the large container didn't move. The swordsman read the flashy sign, telling him what exactly the item for sale was.
"PIRATE CHEW TOYS!" it said in bold red marker. Under this writing, there was more scrawled in blue: "With your dog chewing on these, if the real pirate shows up, you'll be safe. SALE: 50 Beli each." Grinning, Zoro picked through the laughable pile until one made him freeze.
Luffy went up to the owner of the shop and stared down at the little man. This old guy was in the middle of reading an article on grooming your gerbil when Luffy tapped on his head. Tap. Tap. Tap.
"Yes?" the old man asked with annoyance. Tap. Tap. Tap.
"Ossan, how much is the parrot?" Luffy asked, still poking the other man's skull. A wrinkled hand grabbed the abusive one and tossed it onto the counter.
"Since you did that, five thousand beli." Luffy's eyes grew wide as he counted the number of zeroes. One… two… three… four… no, just three… Checking the pockets of his jean capris, the ebony-haired boy frowned as he found he had only his allowance from Nami – or what was left of it. He was given five hundred beli every time they landed on an island, but he had bought a donut at the bakery he saw. It left him with three hundred and seventy-five.
"Can you take off… two zeroes, Ossan?"
"Of course not," came a grumpy reply. Luffy sighed and walked back to Usopp and Brooke who were gazing at tropical fish.
There were all different types Luffy had never seen before. Red ones, pink ones, and even a big rainbow carp glittered in the tanks, waiting for some person to wander in and buy them. The fish were also very expensive, making Usopp imagine this trip to the pet store as a visit to an aquarium, mixed with a trip to a petting zoo where you were not allowed to touch the animals.
Luffy finally got bored with the fish and ambled down a random aisle, stopping to sample a cookie (dog treat) and ring a cat bell. Passing canned wet food and packages of dry kibble, the Straw Hat captain saw a sign that read "PET COLLARS" in green letters, almost the same color as Zoro's hair. Below that, there was a small explanation in orange: "These will not leave the animal's neck, no matter how they try to slip out of it. Great for pets who love to lose their collars. Reg. Price: 150 Beli each." Luffy went through the racks of colors and patterns, searching for one that would be perfect for the dream pet he would not be buying that day. Right before he was about to gaze through the bottom rack' content, there was the sound of the door slamming open.
Peering at the front of the shop, Luffy saw a large bearded man with an eye patch. Stepping quickly to the end of the row he was in, Luffy stared down at the newcomer's feet, or foot and peg leg to be exact. Eyes sparkling, he glanced at first the man's right shoulder and then the left. There was no bird. There was no monkey. There was no animal to be seen.
"What are you staring at, runt?" the pirate growled, pushing Luffy roughly aside with one hand. Falling to the tiled floor, Luffy held onto his hat and glared up at the other man.
"How rude," he huffed, brushing himself off as he got up, "and I thought you were cool too." The bearded man ignored the comment and stepped up to the counter where the old man had switched articles and was reading up on the latest Grand Line Pet Show. The small guy would have wished Luffy were there to poke him again when a giant fist collided with his cranium. Crashing to the ground, the old man glared at the obvious pirate man.
"What do you want, scum?" he asked, getting up and feeling his head for the wound that was bound to be there. A cut was beginning to drip blood.
"Just a new parrot. As you can see, I lost old Kelly in a battle yesterday."
"I have no parrots. Get out."
"There's one right here," Luffy pointed out bluntly, holding out a finger to show the bird that was shrieking, "Thank you, come again," at the top of its lungs. The pirate man grinned and picked up the shopkeeper by the collar of his shirt.
"So, you lied to me? I don't like it when people lie. How much is the bird?" The old man held up seven fingers, not the least bit scared when it came to merchandise.
"Seven hundred thousand beli." He was roughly shaken, but didn't cower.
"Knock it down a few zeroes."
"Seven hundred and fifty thousand beli."
"I didn't say make the price higher," the bearded man growled.
"Hey," Luffy broke in, "he's raising the price because you're being really rude." The other pirate dropped the small man and turned to face Luffy.
"You dare call the great Captain Ridgeman rude?" Luffy nodded dumbly.
"Uh-huh. 'Cause it's true." A fist was swung, but Luffy dodged, stepping back and bumping into a cage where a panting puppy was stupidly wagging its tail.
"Not near the animals!" the old man yelled, grabbing at Captain Ridgeman's leg in an attempt to stop him. The shopkeeper was tossed to the ground like a rag doll, but tried to get up again.
"Ossan," Luffy said with a grin, "don't worry, I'll protect your animals from this guy. I don't like him very much. Zoro, take Ossan outside."
"Right, Senchou," Zoro answered, quickly whizzing down the row he was in and grabbing the old man as he headed out the door.
"Alright, now we can fight." Luffy was just about to get ready when he took a blow to the stomach. He quickly figured out he couldn't move, not wanting the dog behind him to get hurt.
"Luffy!" Usopp cried out from behind a fish tank. The foe at hand laughed.
"You talk big, but you're not very tough, are you kid? Not very bright either, huh?" Luffy got a fist in the face and was pushed up against the bunny house. Ridgeman followed, about to give Luffy a mighty kick in the gut with the peg leg when something came whizzing through the air and scratched his bearded cheek.
"C-cat toy… st-star," Usopp stuttered, sling shot in hand.
"Good one, Usopp-kun," Brooke whispered, "but it was not a star."
"Who cares if it's not a star; we need to help Luffy!"
"Right!"
Ripping open a bag of kibble, Usopp began to shoot at Ridgeman with accuracy, not missing a single shot. Luffy smiled widely and socked the other pirate captain in the leg. The man stumbled backwards, but was cushioned by the person who just hit him. What he would have crashed into was the case where the lizard sat, watching the spectacle.
"Luffy-san, use this!" Brooke yelled, passing his captain a dog bone. Luffy caught it in his teeth, but it shattered as he received a blow to the head.
"You can't do much when you have to protect the animals," Ridgeman snickered, grabbing Luffy by his red vest. Hurling the boy towards a cage of kittens, the Straw Hat captain did his best to avoid hitting the obstacle. He barely missed it and slid underneath the table the felines were propped up on. Usopp kept up his onslaught, but it didn't seem to have much of an effect, so he let Brooke handle the next part.
"Yohohoho. It is not very kind of you to attack Luffy-san," Brooke mumbled, attempting to unsheathe the sword hidden in his cane. It wouldn't come out no matter how he tried. Usopp paled and remembered that he and Chopper had glued the thing shut a few days before as a joke.
"Luffy, just run!" the long nosed teen called out, realizing that without backup, Luffy didn't have a chance.
"No," was a firm reply, "He'll hurt Ossan's animals." The two members of the Straw Hat crew heard the determination in their captain's voice and decided to do more than just wait for the fight to end. Taking a spot in front of the rabbit pen, Usopp (legs wobbling, mind you) stood gallantly protecting the long-eared creatures. Brooke scared the chinchilla that had just woken up by choosing to shield it. "Thanks guys," Luffy laughed, hopping over the table he was still behind and getting his fist ready.
Ridgeman just laughed, pulling out a broadsword and waving it wildly. Brooke parried a few blows aimed at animals in range of the sharp object before the weapon was dropped hurriedly. Luffy aimed and let his fist fly. It seemed the other pirate had known exactly how the boy was going to attack, because he quickly brought out a dagger, ready to stab through the oncoming knuckle.
"Damn!" the parrot shouted as the clang of metal against metal rang out through the shop.
"Be more careful, Luffy," Zoro growled, taking the weight of the blow with the length of one of his swords.
"Zoro! Why'd you do that? It was the perfect shot!"
"If you wanted to get your hand impaled!" the first mate argued, taking out a second sword to put at the bearded pirate's neck. Ridgeman flinched, but did not try to attack or move in any way.
"Nice work on my command, Zoro," Usopp cheered, comical tears of fright coming out of his eyes. Brooke laughed and petted the hyperventilating chinchilla he was guarding.
"Yohoho, I think we have this pet shop battle won, Ridgeman-san," the skeleton man said in a cryptic voice that made Usopp cower even more. The pirate gulped.
"Get him, Zoro!" Luffy yelled, watching his swordsman spin and attack Ridgeman with a slash that was enough to knock the large man behind the counter. With a bit of dragging, the crew was able to get the pirate outside and tied up in chain link leashes and sting cat toys.
Looking at their work, they all turned to the old man who was calmly reading the last article in his magazine about animal pirates like Bepo and Chopper, whoever they were. His head was still bleeding, but with Zoro's haramaki situated on his head like a bad hat, the blood wasn't getting into his eyes and obstructing his reading.
"Ossan," Luffy called out, to the shopkeeper, "we're done! And none of the animals got hurt."
"Good," came a grumble, "I would have killed you all if any of them had the smallest scratch." The little man walked back into his shop and avoided stepping on the kibble strewn all over the tiles. Going back to his place behind the counter, he chucked a broom at Luffy and pointed to the ground. The broom was passed around until Brook was stuck with the job of sweeping up all the wasted food. Zoro restrained Luffy from attempting to eat any of it until it was all in the trash.
"The animals are so cool," Luffy sighed, looking at the lizard again.
"Boy in the straw hat," the shopkeeper called out, "come here." Luffy sat down on top of the counter only to be pushed off.
"What?"
"Don't sit on my counter. Anyway, I think that, for saving my shop from absolute destruction, I can entrust you with one of my animals. For having your skeleton friend clean up as well, you may choose one pet free of charge." Luffy's eyes sparkled and he turned around to view all the critters who seemed to understand one of them would be going home. Luffy looked at the parrot that cawed "please buy something" before he took off down an aisle. Stopping at the collars, he looked through them until he found a red one with a diamond pattern to it. Picking the biggest size, he went back to the check out counter and set it down.
"I don't think I want any pet today," he grinned, "but can I have this for the future?" The old man glared at Luffy with concern.
"You're passing up a great deal, you know. It is not often I give away free pets." Luffy just shook his head.
"I think that if I took one, you'd lose one of your family."
"I see. Take the collar. And… this." The old man left his counter and went down an aisle, choosing a sturdy black rope leash that also had the diamond design. Handing it to Luffy, he smirked. "Now that I've paid you back. I think your friend is scaring Pipsy again."
"Pipsy?" the Straw Hat captain turned to see the chinchilla at Brooke's mercy yet again. "Oh, Pipsy. C'mon guys, I think we should go pick up the supplies before Nami gets mad at us."
"Eh?" Usopp gasped in surprise, "Luffy actually wants to do something he was told to without being dragged?"
"Hey," Luffy spat back indignantly, "Food is very important!" He chased the long nosed sniper out of the shop as Brooke waved goodbye to Pipsy and left at a more leisurely pace. The shopkeeper went back to sit on his stool and read the last article of his magazine. Finally, everything was as normal as could be with the pet shop, almost as if nothing had happened. The old guy closed the glossy pages of his magazine and took the haramaki off his head, handing it to the swordsman who held out 50 beli.
"Buying something? What is it? I can't take money unless it matches the price of the merchandise." Zoro's face became a bit pink as he flashed the item in the little man's face.
"And can I get a bag or something?" The old man grinned and got a paper bag. Handing it over, he took the 50 beli and put it in the cash register. The green-haired man gazed out the window to check if Luffy was still chasing Usopp around the street before stuffing his new item into the bag.
"I think," the shopkeeper mumbled to the swordsman, "that your captain could handle certain pets, like Chopper, but probably nothing that can't take care of itself." Zoro nodded, taking the words as both advice and a warning.
"You're right. I think Luffy would kill any animal in a week or two, on accident of course."
"Two days."
"A week."
"Two days."
"A week."
"Two days."
"I don't think Nami would let that happen."
Without another word, Zoro walked out of the pet shop with a simple wave behind him. The crew still had shopping to do…
"What took you guys so long?" Nami yelled at the four boys that came back to the ship well after dark.
"We went around the whole town," Luffy mumbled through his sore cheeks that had been scratched by female nails.
"And I saved the pet shop from a pirate captain named Ridgeman!" Usopp added with pride.
"You're lying," Sanji said bluntly, kicking the long nose in the nose. The two began to quarrel until Nami whacked them both on the head.
"Either way, we can leave for the next island now. The log pose only took two hours to set."
"Yay!" Luffy cried in joy, "New Island, here we come!"
"Kenshi-san?" Robin asked, looking at the swordsman with questioning eyes.
"These idiots dragged me around all afternoon and I'm tired. I think I'm gonna turn in for the night."
"Zoro," Luffy whined, "but we haven't even had dinner yet."
"What did you call that all-you-can-eat-until-they-kicked-us-out-buffet? Snack?"
"Yup," the captain laughed, turning to Sanji. "Dinner, Sanji."
"We had it hours ago. Heat it up yourself, stupid captain."
Zoro went out of the kitchen and walked across the lawn to the men's bedroom. Taking out the item he had bought at the shop, he got into bed and fell asleep. The next morning, he woke up to Sanji's snicker.
"You know, this is really sad, Marimo," he laughed, holding up the Luffy doll chew toy, "are you really this desperate?"
Until the next island, everyone (except oblivious Luffy) had fun times laughing at Zoro.
KittyLuffy: Ah, I still love the Luffy doll...
Robin: It is a cute touch. I wonder if there is a Franky one...
KittyLuffy: Anyway, I like how they beat Ridgeman and saved the old man's pet shop!
Robin: Whatever happened to Ridgeman?
KittyLuffy: *whistles and looks away* Usopp said something about the storekeeper calling the Marines, getting Ridgeman's bounty, and buying a bigger store.
Robin: I see... Readers, please move to the next story because I helped write it full of ZoLu. Also, comment on how exciting this chapter was.
KittyLuffy: And about Usopp's bravery. He'd like that.