It's really over tomorrow. I'm feeling really grief-stricken at the moment. Got my midnight tickets and right now I'm somewhere between anxious and reluctant.

LBM

Evie and Remus sat huddled together outside a couple of weeks after the first Quidditch match of the season. The day, though unusual for autumnal British weather, was a comfortable temperature, undoubtedly one of the last before the chill set in. Nevertheless both were wrapped in their cloaks for good measure.

"You know, I had no idea that we even had a strawberry grove at Hogwarts," said Evie looking around.

"That's probably because we spend most of our time exploring the inside of the castle, rather than out," reasoned Remus, "Make sure to powder that bicorn horn nicely."

The reason they sat outside today of all days was the potion they were working on- the one that would help turn Evie, James, Sirius, and Peter into animagi.

"I know I know. I'm not as hopeless with potions as Peter is."

"No one is as hopeless at potions as Peter is."

She giggled, "Fair point. Those sods are lucky to have us as friends, that's all I've got to say."

"Think of it this way, would you rather they handle the potion?" he said offhandedly as he added several diced leeches into the potion.

She stifled a laugh, "No I suppose not. James and Sirius are a lot better at knicking the ingredients than they are at handling them."

"Speaking of James and Sirius, where are they?" Though he knew exactly where they were.

"Detention with McGonagall."

Their transfiguration teacher, though proud and grateful at them for having won Gryffindor the match was less than thrilled at the two boys for recounting the play-by-play in the middle of her class for, as she had put it, "the fiftieth and final time!"

"Never will learn, will they?" he said catching her eye. She gave him a small grin and shrugged.

"No, I suppose they won't." She added the powdered bicorn horn before cleaning her hands with a quick scourgify. The potion, which had been a light turquoise turned to beige and started steaming.

Remus aimed his wand at the potion and cast an imperturbable charm upon the cauldron.

"How long do we leave it outside for?" asked Evie as they walked up the path from Hagrid's hut back to the castle.

"Well it's supposed to be exposed to the sun and moon for seventy-two hours. After that it's merely a case of getting the other ingredients in on time."

Thus was the snag they had hit. The ingredients the potion required at first were easy enough to find for the most part. The rest, however, were not. The four pints of Re'em blood would have to be imported from North America and bought under the table from a contact Sirius said he knew from Knockturn Alley. The potion also required tooth, hair, and nail from a Chimera. This, again, would have to be procured in as shadily a transaction as the blood. Not to mention the Ashwinder eggs the potion would need by the following year. The most difficult to find, and as it were the next, ingredient was Acromantula venom. This would not be as easily purchasable as the others- no, this was rare. And yet they had not discussed what they knew inevitably they would have to do to acquire it.

"I haven't properly thanked you all for what you're doing," he said softly. She glanced at him with a curious expression.

"Remus, you know you don't have to thank us. This is what friends are for. This-"

"This is a huge risk, Evie," he stopped suddenly turned to her, "This is something I'll never be able to repay you for. It's a sacrifice I wish you didn't have to make."

"Remus," she spoke as softly as her gaze, "It's no more than what you go through every month."

"Did I ever tell you h-how," his breath hitched. He cleared his throat a couple of times before he sat looking out at the forest in the distance, "how it happened?"

"No. We always just assumed you couldn't remember," she said joining him.

"Oh no. I remember. I remember every part of it." She noticed his features darken. Evie had never seen such anger, resentment, or sadness in any one person's face like that before- not even Sirius when he spoke of his family. "I still have nightmares about it, you know. That night."

"How old were you?"

"I was six, practically a baby really," as he said this his eyes, which were still focused on the forest, seemed as if they were in search of something far off and unreachable, "I was in the backyard playing near the trees that lined it. I'd disobeyed my parents, you see. I did that often back then- disobey orders. Hard to believe but I was once very much like James and Sirius."

He smiled sadly. Evie felt a lump forming in her throat as her eyes began to sting.

"I didn't know what the full moon meant. I didn't know the dangers I was in standing in my own backyard. I was so tired of my parents telling me to go to bed earlier and earlier every night. Well I wasn't going to obey on that particular night- no, I was not," he laughed humorlessly, "I remember hearing a howling sound in the distance. It was savage and terrifying. I began to run to the backdoor, as fast as my small legs could carry me, but it wasn't enough. The pain ripped through my back first. Then it was all over, like every part of me was being torn and maimed as easily as putty. I couldn't even cry out I was in so much pain. It was my father who scared it off, fired jinxes and hexes at it before it decided to scurry away. In all the haze I remember the healers, seeing my parents covered in blood and feeling terrified that the monster had hurt them too. Then I realized it was my own blood. My own tainted blood."

By now the calm and silent Saturday morning had gone from tranquil to eerily still. Tears were flowing freely now from Evie's eyes as she looked at her best friend. She had never felt closer to him.

"I'm so sorry, Remus."

"No, Evie. It's me who'll be sorry if I so much as hurt you or the others. It isn't too late to stop, to rethink what you're willing to do for me," he looked at her finally, a mad ferocity in his eyes she had never seen.

She shook her head sadly, "No. When are you going to get it through your head? We're in this with you. You've suffered enough."

"That doesn't mean you need to suffer with me! I turn into that very same monster that came for me," he stood shaking.

She followed, "You would do the same for any of us! You know you would. We're family, Remus, we all are. Do you think Sirius would ever consider doing something like this for Narcissa? Or Regulus? What about his dear mum and dad? Do you think he'd bat an eyelash if any number of his relatives went through what you did? No! No he wouldn't. And you know why? Because you're more family to him than they have ever been. Because from the moment the five of us met there wasn't anything we couldn't do together. There's nothing we can't accomplish or beat as long as we've got each other. And that includes what we're trying to do now. Your blood- tainted or not- doesn't mean galleons to us! We could care less about what others might call dirty blood."

By now both friends were crying openly, Remus shaking his head.

"I couldn't bear it if I hurt you, any of you," he said softly.

She closed the distance between them and held him to her, "You're not a monster, Moony. You're our friend, our family, and we'll stand by you no matter what."

He hugged her back before giving her a quizzical look, "Moony, eh?"

"It just came to me. Thought it had a nice ring to it," she shrugged.

He chuckled softly as he wiped his lingering tears, "I suppose I could get used to it."

It was late in the afternoon by the time James and Sirius were out of detention. Lunch had already passed and rather than wait for dinner they decided to head off to the kitchens.

"That was beyond dismal," groaned Sirius, "McGonagall really knows how to lay out a detention. Didn't know kids chewed so much gum."

James nodded in approval, "I don't think I'll ever look at the underside of a desk quite the same again."

"When do you really plan on looking at the underside of a desk again?"

"Knowing us, who's to say?" he grinned impishly. Sirius laughed but couldn't disagree. When it came to their shenanigans predictability was nonexistent. The closer the pair got to the kitchens the closer it seemed they got to a set of voices that were in a heated argument.

"I just don't understand you, Sev! How can you really defend them after that?"

"You just don't understand!"

"Oh I understand plenty so don't treat me like an idiot! Is it not enough for you and those thugs to bully people in our year? You've got to go and harass first years? My best friend's cousin no less!"

"Oh really? Your best friend is she? Well I didn't know who the girl was!"

"Like that makes a difference!"

"Problem, Evans?" said James, lamely attempting to mess up his already disheveled hair even more. Lily's eyes narrowed at him and Sirius. Snape's eyes looked coldly and calculatingly at Sirius who glared back just as fervently.

"Aren't you supposed to be in detention, Potter?" she said heatedly.

"Oh I was, but I got out early for good behavior," he grinned, "Now, why's Snivellus giving you such a hard time?"

"Don't call him that!"

"Sounded like quite a tussle," said Sirius in mock concern.

"Probably didn't bother keeping his monthly shampoo appointment," tutted James, "As if the slime ball needed any extra grease."

Snape charged at them, "Why you-!"

"No, Sev!" Lily had grabbed onto Snape's arm as it plunged into his robes reaching for his wand. "They're not worth it!"

"Believe me, Evans, I'm more than worth it," James said with a wink.

"You're unbelievable!"

"Thank you."

"Just go. It's none of your business."

Sirius shook his head, "But it wouldn't be very gentlemanly of us to leave you, a lady, here in present company in the middle of a violent altercation."

Lily was practically seething by this point. "Just go, Sev. You don't need the trouble and frankly I don't think there's anything more to say at this point."

"Ooh he must have done something bad," laughed Sirius.

Snape's glare turned quickly into a malevolent smile. "Oh I did, Black. By the time we were through with her, your girlfriend's runty cousin couldn't stop crying."

The grin fell from both boys' faces.

"What are you talking about, Snivelly?" demanded James. Lily was now frantic to get Snape gone.

"Bloxum. I didn't know when I cornered her with Avery and Mulciber that she was her cousin, but when I did it only made the jinxes roll off the tongue faster."

James and Sirius started for Snape, but before they could reach him Lily had jumped forward, shielding him with her wand outstretched.

"No. Just let him go. He's already been punished-"

"He won't know the meaning of the word until I'm done with him," growled Sirius.

"Just let him go for now. Besides," she started weakly, "don't you think Evie will want her chance at him as well?"

James had never known Lily to plead for anything. This softer side of her was something he found he liked, however, given who she was using it for he found himself deeply unsettled. The monster growing in the pit of his stomach wanted to tear Snape's head off. How dare he let Lily protect him! How dare he undeservingly have her affection! He was twice the bloke that Snape was, and somehow he would prove it. He would give in where Snape wouldn't. He would concede for her.

"Fine. Go."

"What?" Sirius barked. He wanted his piece of Snape. He wanted to tear him a new one for daring to lay a hand on Evie's cousin. Scarlett was a very nice, very sweet girl. She was nice to a fault and Evie cared for her very much, like one would care for a younger sibling. Sirius wanted to put Snape in the Hospital Wing just like he'd done to Scarlett.

"You heard, Evans," said James as he looked into the green eyes he often daydreamed about, "Evie's going to want a piece of this too. I personally relish the fact that he'll be paranoid and obsessively waiting for it."

"I've lost my appetite," snarled Sirius before turning on his heel. Lily's eyes met James's for a moment and softened- something he'd only ever dreamed about. He understood the gratefulness they conveyed before turning to follow his friend.

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