Klaine ~~~ Kurt and Blaine LOVE
The War of the Warblers
Chapter 9: I say, "No!"
"Kurt! What are you doing? Are you ok?" Blaine yelled as Kurt joined him at the left wing of the stage.
Everyone else was also shocked, either gaping at Kurt or asking him what was going on.
Kurt didn't look at anyone else but Blaine and then to the ground.
Blaine tried to meet his eyes. "Kurt! What happened?" He asked grabbing Kurt's arms.
Kurt shook his head. "I can't."
Rachel's mouth fell open. "What do you mean you can't?" She yelled.
"Kurt. Look at me. Why? What's going on? This is your solo! Come on! Go out there and kill it!" Blaine said giving him an unsure smile.
Kurt finally looked back up into Blaine's eyes. "I don't deserve it."
"WHAT?" Half of the group said in shock.
Rachel and Mercedes were flabbergasted.
"Kurt what on earth are you talking about?" Blaine said concerned.
"I don't deserve the solo. I'm not going out there."
"Kurt…" Blaine began.
"Blaine. I don't deserve this. I… I still feel terrible about everything I put you through."
"What? Kurt, forget about—" Blaine started to say.
"No! Everything… everything, I did… Blaine… and about... what happened with Karofsky... I…"
Blaine took his gaze off of Kurt's eyes and looked to the side.
"Blaine!" Kurt said trying to get Blaine to look at him again. "I know you forgave me for everything but I-"
"Kurt. This isn't the time for this!" Blaine said stern.
"I know! We'll talk about everything later but… I still…"
"Just go out there and do your solo. This is what you want." Blaine pointed to the stage.
"I do want it! I do but… I want you to have it!"
Blaine's mouth fell open, along with everyone else's.
"I'm a diva…" Kurt said with a little smirk. "So, of course I want to go out there! But I want to give this to you. I know the others don't know but I heard your song! You wrote an amazing song. You need to go out there and sing it!"
"Kurt what are you-"
"New Directions… are you disqualifying yourselves?" Someone from the show choir committee asked the group.
Kurt looked at the person desperately. "Two minutes, please!"
The person stared at him, nodded, and then walked away.
Kurt began to speak quickly, "Blaine, listen to me. You need to sing your song! I am so proud of you. I know you're used to solos but I know this is different. I know this is your own words and I know it takes more courage to go out there and tell the world how you feel but… Like Scott said. You are the bravest guy I know! You're not scared anymore. You and me we'll never be scared again! We recently saw how being scared into being someone you're not can ruin a person's life. I don't want that for you. I want you to go out there and sing your song. I want you to have this." Kurt was now grabbing onto Blaine's arms.
Blaine just blinked. "But… this is your solo."
"Hey like I said I'm a diva. I'll take the next solo from Rachel or Mercedes." He said giving them a little wink.
"But…. I…"
"Blaine. What I want more than any solo, is to make you happy." Kurt smiled and Blaine couldn't help but smile back. "Now get out there!" Kurt said trying to give him a little push.
Blaine looked at the others.
They looked confused for the most part but Rachel gave Blaine a little nod.
Blaine looked back at Kurt and nodded too. "Ok!"
Kurt's smile grew. "Go!"
Blaine walked out onto the stage. He stood behind the microphone stand and looked out at the crowd.
Kurt was right. He was used to solos but he was also right that this was completely different. This was Blaine putting himself out there for the world to see. Usually the stage was a second home for him. It was somewhere he felt safe, somewhere no one could touch him. But now… he wasn't sure. What if no one liked what he had to say? What if they hated it, if they didn't understand it? What if they judged him? What if… this world didn't accept him? If they didn't like how different he was? He knew first hand what people did to others they didn't understand and accept.
Then Blaine looked over at Kurt.
Kurt was beaming at him. He sent him a thumbs up and Blaine smiled.
Yes, Kurt was right… he had been scared but… did it really matter what the world thought? As long as he had Kurt did anything anyone else thought mattered? He and Kurt might have their problems but the one thing he was sure of was that Kurt loved him and because of that love Blaine was done, done trying to fit into the world's expectations of him. He was going to say no.
The music started to play.
Blaine gave Kurt a little nod and then looked out at the crowd again. He saw Scott.
Scott was smiling up at him.
Blaine sent him a wink and then after taking a deep breath,
"Status Quo"
By: Darren Criss (Starship)
It starts with not questioning the answers
And giving up before you've begun
It locks all the doors
Increases the pressure
And in a flash
Your time is up before it's done
And you won't know how it can feel
To feel at all
So I say no to status quo
Who wants to be like the rest
And deny the best that I'm meant for
I will show the status quo
Who wants to be normal
I'll never conform
I will be content to resent the status quo
I'll kick down the walls around me
They don't know how strong I am
I'm not defined by boundaries
They will never understand
I'm so much more
(Blaine glanced at Kurt)
Than status quo
Forget about being another pipe dreamer
Stuck on the bottom floor
And I know
It's time to go
So maybe I've gotten everything that I wanted
But I think that I might have made it so
When I said no, no, no
To status quo
For a moment Blaine couldn't hear anything. He only heard the sound of his own heart beat and his deep breathes. He looked over at Kurt and Kurt was literally jumping up and down with the biggest smile Blaine had ever seen. Then as if someone suddenly turned the volume up Blaine could hear the blast of noise coming from the audience.
They were all cheering!
The Warblers were even on their feet clapping as hard as they could.
Blaine grinned. A part of him wanted to even cry. He was completely overwhelmed with emotion. This was exactly what he needed. It was a debut to his new life. This school year was really about redemption and clouser and for the first time he truly felt like he had it. This was the new Blaine, a Blaine that was always going to say no, to status quo.
Blaine gave a great sigh of relief and then glanced over at Kurt again.
Kurt was still smiling.
Blaine mouthed the words, "Thank you." to him.
Kurt's smile broadened as he gave Blaine a nod.
Then at that moment the rest of New Direction rushed on stage to take their positions for their next song.
A back stage worker came and took the microphone stand off stage.
Kurt also rushed on stage and without even thinking grabbed Blaine's hand.
Together they ran to the back of the stage turned their backs to the crowd. Their hands separated.
Rachel and Finn took their spots at the front.
The crowd silenced and sat back down in their seats.
The music started to play.
Once again Blaine glanced at Kurt.
Kurt winked and Blaine winked back.
There was a knock on the door.
"It's for me!" Kurt said almost knocking his father to the ground as he rushed to get to the door first.
"Ok! Ok! Don't kill me!" Burt said raising his hands in surrender and looking at his son in disbelief.
"Sorry! It's Blaine!" Kurt said not looking back. He reached the door and after taking a deep breath he opened it.
"Hey." Blaine said with a smile.
"Hi." Kurt said returning the smile with his own.
There was a moment of silence, and then Kurt reached out and took Blaine's hand. "Come on." He said giving Blaine's hand a little tug.
Blaine walked into the house and Kurt automatically started leading him up the stairs.
Blaine smiled and nodded at Kurt's father and said, "Hi."
Burt looked at Kurt. "Where are you two going?" Burt asked suspiciously.
Kurt looked back at his father in disbelief. "My room…"
Burt raised a concerned eyebrow. "To do what?"
Kurt rolled his eyes. "To talk." And with that Kurt pulled Blaine completely up the stairs and into his room. Kurt closed the door behind them and told Blaine to take a seat on his bed.
"What's up with your dad?" Blaine asked.
Kurt rolled his eyes again. "Nothing… he just doesn't want us being inappropriate in here." Kurt sat down next to Blaine on the bed.
"Inappropriate?" Blaine said with a raised eyebrow and a smirk.
Kurt grinned. "Yeah. It's a long story. But anyway…" Kurt put his hand over Blaine's. "We… we're here to talk."
Blaine gave a little nod and then took his gaze from Kurt. He looked causally around the room.
After a minute in silence Kurt sighed and said, "So…"
Blaine didn't look at him. He only repeated, "So…"
Kurt looked down at their hands and gave an ever bigger sigh. "Well… Blaine…"
Blaine glanced at him.
Kurt looked back at Blaine and said, "Well… I… I'm sorry. I really am Blaine. And I know you wanted to just move on from it but… I know if…" Kurt gulped. "If I saw you kissing anyone else no matter what the explanation was I would be heartbroken." Kurt's voice cracked at the last word.
Blaine once again took his eyes off of Kurt and looked aimlessly around the room. "I was."
Kurt's expression turned guilty as he gave Blaine's hand a squeeze. "Blaine… I… I've never regretted something more in my entire life. And you have to know I didn't do it on purpose, I-"
"I know. I believe Karofsky." Blaine still didn't meet Kurt's eyes.
"But… not… only the kiss… I didn't mean to hurt you! Blaine. I would never purposely hurt you. Blaine even with my crazy jealousy I never actually wanted anything to happen to you. I love you too much to want to ever bring you pain. Blaine you have to believe me."
Blaine gave a little nod.
"I know I shouldn't have drank and I shouldn't have been with Dave and… but Blaine… I swear to you that everything I did even getting mad at you and not talking to you, was never because you did anything wrong. It was me dealing with my own craziness. Even though from the beginning I felt Scott was attracted to you and even figured out that he was trying to get with you I never for one second though you would ever cheat on me. I trust you more than anyone else, even more than I trust myself sometimes. I just… I just couldn't stand seeing someone else all over you. Someone who…" Kurt paused.
Blaine glanced at him again.
"Someone, you actually got along with so well… Someone, who might even be better for you..."
"What?" Blaine said now directly looking at Kurt.
"Scott… he's like another you in away. The new lead singer of the Warblers. He's outgoing and was so friendly to you from the beginning. He admired you so much and you guys seemed to hit it off so well. You should have seen you two on that stage together singing. You guys…"
"Kurt. No one is better for me than you." Blaine said very seriously.
Kurt actually felt his heart skip a beat at Blaine's words. Kurt looked back down at their hands and then took a breath and looked up again. "Still… I should not have let my jealously get the better of me like it did. Look at all the problems I caused because of it. I kept my feelings from you, we had a fight, I got drunk, I kissed Dave, and I hurt you." Kurt looked down again. "Even if you forgive me… I won't ever forgive myself." Kurt's eyes started to fill with water, but he was able to keep them in.
There was a long stretch of silence. They both avoid each other's eyes.
Then finally Blaine sighed. "Kurt."
Kurt looked up and met Blaine's eyes.
"Do you know why it was so easy for me to forgive you?"
Kurt's eyes opened wider in surprise. He shook his head.
"Well…" Blaine sighed. "Because, I get it."
Kurt's eyebrows creased to show he didn't understand.
"Trust me… seeing you and Karofsky… you know… It… hurt. More than pretty much anything I've even been through. But then… when everything came out and the truth about everything was revealed… when I found out all this happened because of your jealously and miscommunication… I remembered… there was a moment I felt even worse. There was a moment that hurt me even more than when I saw you kissing Karofsky."
"What? When?" Kurt asked completely astonished.
(Author's Note: The events Blaine will be talking about occurred in my last Klaine fanfiction: Klaine vs. Karofsky. These two fanfics: Klaine vs. Karofsky and Klaine War of the Warblers are linked together. For example Karofsky transferred to Dalton in Klaine vs. Karofsky and in this story he was already at Dalton.)
Blaine lifted his free hand and gently slide the tips of his fingers across Kurt's cheek. "When… you got hurt for me."
Kurt tried to prevent it but failed when his body gave a little shutter. "Blaine. That wasn't… I mean… There is no reason for you to feel bad about that. I chose to push you out the way. I wanted to do it for you."
Blaine shook his head. "When I first transferred to McKinley I could tell right off the back that Karofsky had feelings for you and that he did not like that I was now at your school with you, right in front of him everyday. You couldn't tell exactly what was going on and even when you asked me I still didn't tell you. Just like you I didn't tell you what I was thinking… And just like you I confronted the other person. Instead of tell me how you felt and that you thought Scott was after me, you approached Scott and talked it out with him. Me… well I didn't tell you that I knew Karofsky had feelings for you and I didn't tell you that I felt that his feelings were the reason for his bulling. And not only that, but when I confronted him it ended up in a fight... and because I didn't tell you everything it resulted in you actually getting punched in the face."
"Blaine."
"Kurt. How could I not forgive you when my own failure to trust in telling you the truth about Karosky got you actually physically hurt?"
"Blaine. Those situations are completely different. When you went to Dave it only became a fight because of him. You didn't do anything wrong! Nothing you did caused what happened. Please don't tell me that you blame yourself for that. Blaine. I already told you that I got hurt because I chose to… for you. I wanted to protect you." Kurt looked down at his lap and frowned. "I wanted to protect you from him and… I ended up being the one to hurt you."
Blaine gave a sigh and then also smiled. "And I was trying to protect you from Karofsky back then and it was for me you got hurt."
A tear fell from Kurt's eye and Blaine wiped it away.
"We're a crazy pair aren't we?" Blaine chuckled.
Kurt continued to frown. "I was supposed to be comforting you for what I did wrong… not the other way around. Blaine you didn't do anything wrong not now or than."
Blaine smiled and nodded. "Ok." And then he took Kurt's face into his hand. "And I forgive you. I really do. I don't want you feeling bad anymore. Ok?"
After a long moment Kurt nodded and Blaine kissed him.
The kiss wasn't long or full of passion but swift and full of love.
Blaine put his hand down. "And-"
"Hey! You guys want anything to drink!" Burt Hummel said loudly as he entered the room.
"Dad!" Kurt yelled.
"Just seeing if you guys wanted anything." He said defensively.
"We're fine!" Kurt said.
"Ok." And then with an obvious gesture Kurt's dad opened the door the widest it could go and left the room.
"I guess he's checking to see if we're being inappropriate." Blaine said with a smile.
Kurt rolled his eyes and then looked at Blaine's smiling face. He couldn't help finally smiling too. He squeezed Blaine's hand. "I really do love you."
"I do too."
Then Kurt looked at the open door and then back to Blaine.
"What?" Blaine asked.
"I'm sure we can risk it." And with that Kurt leaned over and kissed Blaine not caring how inappropriate he was being.
The End
Check for updates for a possible bonus chapter!
Song Blaine sings: "Status Quo" written by Darren Criss (Blaine) for the musical Starship (for his theater company, Starkid)
Song is performed by Joey Richter. (his version is the clearest): .com/watch?v=TkQg18qbMQk
You could also hear it sung by Darren: .com/watch?v=mbGznqpNqBM&feature=related