Healing

Bianca was still kicking herself for losing her temper with JR, for letting him get to her. She was sure she had made things worse. By the time she pulled up to their home, she had decided that like it or not, tonight was the night she and Marissa were going to talk. As the garage door opened, she noticed that Marissa's car was missing. She put her car in park and looked at her cell. It was still turned off from the visit to Statesville. She turned it on and saw that she had missed Marissa's call and had a voicemail. Damn it. "Hey. I had a meeting pop up at the last minute. The kids are with Kendall and Zach. I'm not sure how late I'm going to be, but I'd really like to talk when I get home. I love you." Bianca sighed. They seemed to be missing each other a lot lately, but Marissa wanted to talk as well. Could they finally be getting back on track? Maybe. Then she remembered Statesville. Any progress they might have been making was sure to suffer a setback after today. She sighed and headed into the house. Once inside, she dialed Kendall to check on the kids and ask her a favor.

"Hey, Binks. Before you ask, the kids are fine. They've had dinner and finished their homework. How are you doing?"

"Tired. It's been a long day."

"Want to tell me about it?"

"Yes, but I need to tell Marissa first. I was hoping you could help with that."

"You know I will. What do you need?"

"Well, I was hoping the kids could stay over with you tonight. Marissa and I need to talk, really talk, and I think it will be easier to do that without three pairs of little ears eavesdropping."

"You don't know how glad I am to hear that. It's about time. Of course the kids can stay. You know they are welcome any time. The boys love being with their cousins."

"Thanks, Kendall. I'll pack a bag for them and drop it off."

"No need. We swung by earlier, and they each packed a bag. It seems the five of them were already planning on hitting us up for a sleepover tonight. Let me get the kids."

Bianca smiled and spoke with all three children. Each gave her a status of their day. Each promised to do exactly what Aunt Kendall and Uncle Zach said. After telling each child she loved them, the phone was handed back to Kendall.

"Are you okay, Binks?"

"I don't know. I just know that I have to talk with Marissa while I have my courage up."

"I understand. Good luck, and call me tomorrow. I love you."

"Thanks. I need all of the luck I can get right now. I promise to call you first thing tomorrow. I love you too."

/

Marissa picked her car up at the D.A.'s office and headed home. He had promised to deliver a signed copy of the plea deal tomorrow. At least that's almost over. She looked at her phone. No calls from Bianca. She couldn't decide if that was good or bad. After checking the time, she dialed Kendall to check on the kids. They might still be there. If they were, she was hoping she could convince Kendall to keep them for the night.

"Marissa. What's up?"

She could hear the kids in the background. "I thought I'd check and see if the Slater home was still standing."

Kendall laughed. "Yep, still standing, but barely."

"Do you think it could handle those three a little longer, like say overnight? I hate to ask, but I really need to talk to Bianca. I think it's a conversation best held out of their hearing."

"The kids are one step ahead of you, as usual. It seems they had been plotting a sleepover for a couple of days."

"Why am I not surprised. Could I talk to them?" As with Bianca, each promised to follow the rules after telling Marissa about their day. I love you's were exchanged, and she was back on the phone with Kendall.

"Are you okay, Marissa? You sound. I don't know."

"I don't know. Maybe. I guess that all depends on your sister. I'm just pulling up to the house now. I'll call you tomorrow, and thanks again."

"Anytime."

Marissa disconnected the call and headed inside after taking a deep breath to brace herself.

/

Bianca heard Marissa pull into the garage and steeled herself for what she needed to do.

Marissa deposited her purse and keys on the hall table and headed into the family room where Bianca was waiting. She leaned in for a quick kiss and smiled. "Hey. You waited up."

Bianca returned a small smile. "Well, you said you wanted to talk. The kids are staying with Kendall and Zach so we have the place to ourselves."

Marissa nodded and sat down on the couch next to Bianca. "I just got off the phone with them. Kendall said the place was still standing, for the moment."

"How did your meeting go? You're not pushing yourself, are you?"

Marissa shook her head. "I'm fine, but you first. Where did you rush off to this morning?"

Bianca swallowed. So much for small talk. "I need to tell you something. You may not like it. In fact, I'm sure you won't, but I need you to listen and hear me out. Okay?"

"Okay."

"First of all, I need you to know that I love you more than anything. You do know that, right?"

"I do, and you know that I love you too. No matter what."

Bianca smiled weakly. "We'll see."

"No matter what, Bianca. Got it?"

"Okay. Got it. I went to Statesville today to see JR."

"You went to Statesville? By yourself? Why? Why couldn't you tell me earlier? I don't want him anywhere near you, Bianca."

"I had to, and before you start, you said you'd hear me out."

"You're right. You're right. I did. I'm sorry. Go on."

"There were a few reasons that I had to see him. Remember talking with the Mike Jensen last week possibly about a deal with JR? He called this morning to say that JR was turning it down. I thought that maybe I could talk to him. Convince him to take it. That it was the best thing, the only thing to do for AJ's sake. I know I should have talked to you first, but I've felt so helpless since all of this happened. I needed to do something. I'm sorry."

Marissa nodded. "I understand. How did it go?"

Bianca took a shaky breath. "Not good. He started in on you immediately. He said he hoped that you were still in pain. That you deserved it. He started to blame you, us, again for everything that happened. He said that AJ wasn't your son, and he needed to be with family in a normal home." Bianca paused and wiped a tear that had made it's way down her face.

The muscles in Marissa's jaw clenched. Her hands were now fists as she struggled to maintain her temper. Damn you, JR. You're lucky I didn't know what you had put her through. The guards wouldn't have been able to stop me from …

Bianca started again, her voice breaking. "He doesn't give a damn about AJ. He just wants to hurt you. I swear I tried to keep my temper in check, but I lost it. I let him get to me. I just couldn't listen to him talk about you like that. He said he would see us in hell first before he took any deal. I'm sorry, Marissa. I thought I would be able to help, but I only made things worse." Bianca broke down, sobbing.

Marissa pulled her girlfriend to her and held her tightly. Bianca clung to her. Tears streamed down Marissa's face as she sought to somehow comfort the brunette. Time seemed to stop, and they stayed that way until Bianca's sobs finally stopped.

"It's okay, Bianca."

"No. It isn't. You didn't see him."

"Bianca, why didn't tell me what you were going to do? Why did do this on your own?"

"I had to protect you and AJ. I just thought that this was all my fault. All of it. If I hadn't helped JR try to get you back. Told you how I felt. If I could've stopped myself from falling in love with you. Maybe none of this would have happened. I had to do something to fix this mess."

"Bianca, look at me. None of this is your fault. JR is the only one to blame. Not you, not me."

"You? Why would you think"

"Because I led him on. Because I didn't enforce the restraining order. Because you could have been killed."

"Marissa"

"Let me finish. I have something to tell you. Something I'm not very proud of. When I was in the hospital, I didn't want to see you at first."

"You didn't want to see me?"

The pain in Bianca's eyes was too much for Marissa to bear, but she had to finish. "No. I didn't. I thought you would be safer without me. I couldn't put you or the girls in danger. I thought if I left, you would be better off." As tears started flowing from the redhead's eyes, it was now her turn to seek comfort in the arms of Bianca.

After some time, Bianca asked, "What changed your mind?"

A soft laugh escaped from Marissa. "More like who."

Bianca was totally confused. "Why are you laughing, and who changed your mind?"

"Well, brace yourself because you're going to laugh too. It was our mothers."

"Wait, Krystal and mom? You really need to explain."

"Krystal was the first one to see me once I woke up. When I refused to see you, she went to the one person who she thought could get through to me."

Bianca couldn't help but laugh quietly. "Krystal went to mom for help?"

"Yep. Neither one will tell me exactly what happened between them. I only know that when I woke up again, Erica was there. I got a glimpse of what it would be like to face the wrath of Erica Kane."

"What did say to you?"

"I honestly don't remember exactly what she said. I just know that she made me realize that I was being an idiot. I realized that it was easier to stop breathing than to walk away from you, from us." Marissa placed a tender kiss on Bianca's lips. "Do you think you'll ever be able to forgive me?"

"Forgive you? What's there to forgive?"

"For being an idiot."

"Well, you were a pretty big idiot"

"Hello! Pot calling the kettle black."

"I know. I've been a pretty big idiot myself. It's just that I felt so damn guilty about everything."

"I can relate to that. We were just trying to protect each other. I do remember one thing Erica said. It was something my therapist agreed with her about. She said I wasn't responsible for anything that JR did. He's the only one who can control his own actions. The same goes for you, you know. You're not responsible for anything he has done or will do."

"I know that now. I have a pretty good therapist myself and was told the same thing. It's just taken me a while to realize it." Bianca sighed. "What are we going to about him?"

"Ah"

"Marissa?"

"Okay. One last secret. I knew about your visit to Statesville."

"You knew? How?"

"Mike called me in for meeting. He thought you had told me about your plan to talk to JR. He told me that it didn't go well. I decided that I had enough of JR's games."

"What did you do?"

"We set up a meeting with JR and his lawyer and went up to Statesville ourselves."

"That's where you were today?"

"It was."

"Why? Forget I asked. I know why."

"You should."

"Do I want to know how it went?"

"Actually, you do. It's over. There won't be a trial. He took the deal."

"He what?"

"He took the deal! He will be there for the next 35 years, at the very least! No contact with any of us!"

"Just like that?"

"Well, he did get to see some of the Tasker wrath. I think Erica might have even been impressed." Marissa tried to hold back a yawn.

"You've got to be exhausted. You pushed yourself too hard today."

"I'm fine, Bianca."

The brunette did say a word.

"Okay. I pushed some. I'm tired, but that's all. I promise." Marissa yawned again. "I think everything is finally catching up with me."

"Come here."

Marissa leaned back into Bianca's arms and sighed. "I missed this. I missed us."

"I did too."

/

Early the next morning, Kendall decided she had waited long enough. She hadn't heard from either Bianca or Marissa. She told Zach she was going to check on them. When she got to their house, she knocked, but there was no answer. She used the key they had given her, and let herself in. She walked into the family room and stopped. She found the two women asleep, holding each other and smiling. Kendall decided to duck into the kitchen and leave the fresh coffee and bagels she had brought them from Krystal's.

Marissa stirred first and looked at Bianca who had started to wake up as well. She leaned up to kiss her. "Morning. I smell coffee."

Bianca started to laugh. "Morning. I smell it too. You didn't make it?"

"No. If I didn't make it, and you didn't make it then who"

Both women looked at the clock on the mantle. It was 9:30. "Kendall."

They got off the couch and headed for the kitchen. She looked up as both women entered the kitchen. "Morning. Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. It's just that I was worried when I hadn't heard from either of you, and"

"And you couldn't take it any longer. You needed to find out how everything went?" Bianca smiled and finished for her sister.

"That obvious, huh?"

"A little bit, yeah," Marissa said.

They all started laughing. Bianca was the first to collect herself. "I tell you what. You finish getting breakfast ready, and we'll be right back." Kendall nodded and the two women headed upstairs for a quick change.

"You know, she'll leave if we ask nicely," Bianca said as she pulled Marissa to her.

Marissa leaned in for a kiss. "No. As much as I want to be alone with you, your sister has been amazing the last two months. The least we can do is tell her everything."

Bianca kissed Marissa again and sighed. "I hate to admit it, but you're right. Let's go."

/

"Seriously? It's over? He agreed to the deal?"

"Yep. It seems that my girlfriend was very convincing yesterday."

"What can I say, I'm good!" They heard a knock on the front door. Marissa went to see who it was.

"And the two of you?"

"We finally talked, Kendall." Bianca smiled. "We got everything out in the open. No more secrets. We're finally getting us back."

"Binks, that's great! I'm so happy for both of you!"

Marissa entered the kitchen with the district attorney behind her. "Mike, you remember Bianca's sister, Kendall?"

"I do. How are you, Mrs. Slater? Bianca, it's good to see you again."

"It's good to see you too. What brings you here so early?"

"I come bearing gifts. One gift actually," the lawyer said as he handed Marissa a brown envelope.

"The deal? It's signed already?" Marissa said as she carefully opened it. She soon went into lawyer mode and began reading the document.

"Would you like some coffee?" Kendall offered.

"Coffee would be great. It was an early morning. You know she's an impressive woman, Bianca."

Bianca smiled brightly. "I know."

"Did she tell you about the visit?"

"I heard the highlights."

"Hmmm. I have a feeling she downplayed her role." The D.A. then related everything Marissa said to JR.

"You're kidding me? She told him that?" Kendall asked.

Bianca laughed. "Well, she did say that she thought mom would be impressed."

Marissa was just finishing reading the document when she heard Bianca laugh. She looked up and saw beautiful brown eyes looking at her. "Did I miss something?"

"Not at all," Bianca said as she walked over to kiss Marissa.

"I should go and file the plea deal with the court. That is your copy. I'll see myself out."

"Thank you!"

"I'm glad I was able to help. Oh, Marissa, if you ever decide to give up private practice, I think I can find a place for you in my office."

/

Five children soon rushed into the kitchen followed by Zach. "Mom!" All three women turned and scooped up their respective children.

"Sorry. I tried to keep them distracted, but they wanted to see their mothers."

Marissa hugged Zach and said, "It's okay." She handed him the envelope with the plea deal and whispered, "Could you put this someplace safe for us? I don't want AJ or the girls to find this until we have a chance to talk to them about it."

"Is this what I think it is?"

Marissa nodded. "Kendall can give you the details later."

Zach smiled and carefully place the envelope in his coat pocket.

AJ ran over to Marissa. "Mom! It's snowing!"

"Really? Well, it is December."

"Can we go outside?"

"I don't see why not. Everyone bundle up."

A short time later, Marissa stood back watching her family. Children laughing, running and dodging snowballs. She knew there would be work ahead to make sure they stayed healthy and happy, but she also knew that with Bianca by her side, they would make it.

As if on cue, Bianca came up behind her, hugging her tightly. "Are you okay?"

"Oh yeah. More than okay." She turned to kiss the brunette. What started as a tender kiss, soon deepened, and they became lost in each other.

"Ahem."

The women turned to see Kendall smiling. "You know, you're going to melt this snow if you don't stop that."

Bianca and Marissa looked at each other and started laughing. "Ah, Kendall?"

"Yeah, I know. Zach and I will take the kids one more night." There was a smirk on her face as she walked away.

"Kendall is definitely my second favorite Kane woman."

"Yeah? Who's your favorite?" Bianca smirked.

A slow, devilish smile spread across Marissa's face. "I'll show you later!"