Author's Note: I'm so excited with all the new readers that have joined, it really makes my day! I try to post once a week (fighting a flu that stopped me last week), but I will be taking a brief break for a few weeks. There are a few things that's killing my focus and...well with DA2 coming out on Tuesday (!) I think it might be quiet here for a bit anyhow! But I hope you enjoy this chapter, and I'll be back to rock the last half of this story soon :D

~There and Back Again~

Helplessly, she struggled against the giant fingers that curled around her body as she watched the bloody fist fly towards her. Kicking against air, she tried to scream but there was no sound…

Loudly she gasped as she lurched forward. Feeling a firm hand on her shoulder, Drea vaguely realized everything was dark. "Oh good, you're awake," Velanna spoke softly, not flustered by her sudden jolt as she gently pushed her down onto her bedroll.

Her heart pounded hard in her chest as the confusion set in. Desperately her mind raced trying to make sense of why she was no longer on the battlefield. Again, Drea struggled to sit up as she slurred her words, "Where am I?"

Ignoring the panic in her voice, Velanna was quiet for a moment as Drea heard her clinking a glass in the dark. She finally turned to Drea and pushed something into her hand as she briskly replied, "Safe. I'll tell you everything, but first, you need to drink this."

Drea hesitated, but soon Velanna was helping her bring the cup to her lips. Giving in, Drea drank deeply, bracing against the hideous taste that she somehow knew was coming. Trying not to retch as Velanna took the glass away, she suddenly felt a heavy mass flop on her lap and sigh. Instinctively, she reached over and felt Arkon's head on her leg, again hearing him softly whine. As her eyes started to adjust, she could see she was in a tent and the sun had already set. Glancing down at Arkon, she numbly patted him as he stared adoringly up at her. Giving her eyes another moment to focus, she looked over at Velanna to see she was patiently watching her. "How long was I out?" she croaked.

"A couple of days," Velanna answered.

"A couple of days?" Drea cut her off, the astonishment clear in her voice. "But…"

Velanna sharply waved her into silence. "It was bad. Drea…you survived injuries more severe than I have ever seen anyone recover from. In fact, even with our combined healing efforts, neither Anders nor I are sure you will have your former range of motion."

Still in a daze, she dropped her eyes down to look at her hands. Slowly opening and closing her fists, she carefully turned her hands over and frowned. She didn't feel a difference. Quietly, she asked, "What do you mean?"

Velanna's deep sigh brought Drea's gaze up from her hands. "Well…so many of your bones were broken that, after we stabilized you, we had to localize our healing so we could set your bones as we went. If we had just healed you like normal, who knows how everything would have fused together. It was simple enough to set your limbs, but the greatest damage was to your ribs and…well when we had to set those, I imagine we looked more like we were slaughtering you than healing you. It was a good thing you were unconscious…I don't imagine anyone could survive the intensity of that pain. And…while we were diligent…it may not be perfect."

Drea silently reflected on the news. A fighter that can't yield a sword is really not a fighter at all; her mouth went dry at the thought. Reaching back over to Arkon, she mindlessly burrowed her fingers into his fur. "I'm alive," she finally said after a moment as she gave a slight nod, "And it couldn't have been easy on either of you. Words don't amount to much, but…thank you."

Stiffly, Velanna continued, "Yes. Well what you also need to know is that we are a short distance outside of Denerim and have encountered an issue." Even in the dimly lit tent, Velanna could see the shock on Drea's face. Before she could ask how, Velanna answered, "Sigrun. She carries a tremendous amount of guilt over her part in the battle. Knowing how important it was for you to return to Amaranthineimmediately, she found a cart in a nearby abandoned farm. She had to put a bit of work into fixing it up but we were able to make good time."

While she merely blinked, the rest of the world had carried on. Her mangled body was easy enough for her to distance herself from, but the black void of missing time was harder to ignore. It added another layer to the surreal film that was surrounding her. Pushing past her brief moment of uneasiness, she silently decided to talk to Sigrun in the morning. Taking a deep breath, she asked, "And the issue?"

"Nathaniel insists…and I'm inclined to agree…that the King be informed of our findings. But we also don't have the time to spare another trip into Denerim. Personally, I think it would be best to quickly deliver a message while everyone else carries on to Amaranthine…"

"I think that's best," Drea agreed. "In fact, if you get me some paper, I can write out an update for him right now." Catching Velanna's hesitant look, Drea added, "It's alright, I'm up to the task of writing a quick letter."

Nodding to herself, Velanna rose to her feet and paused at the tent door. "I'll let Nathaniel know you are awake. He hasn't willingly left your side since you fell…I was a little surprised at his level of devotion…"

As she quietly let all the news settle, she continued to massage her fingers into her mabari's fur. His soft sigh drew a smile from her lips as she slowly closed her eyes. It was only moments later when she heard the rustle from her tent flap. Opening her eyes again, she saw Nate standing uncomfortably near the entrance. Even once he saw she was awake, he still remained several steps away. Finally, Drea gestured for him to come closer as she whispered to him, "I'm okay Nate."

Before he could reply, Velanna came back in with both hands full and a book tucked under her arm. Coming up to Nate, she pushed a bowl and flask at him, "Here…take these…" she instructed impatiently. Leaving him standing there, she knelt beside Drea and unloaded more items. Soon she had lit a candle and turned the journal to an empty page for Drea. Feeling Velanna's sense of urgency, Drea wasted no time and immediately started penning a letter to Alistair. To her surprise, the words seemed to flow on their own. It wasn't the best note she had ever written, but before long she was tearing the paper from the book.

As Velanna dripped wax onto the folded paper for Drea to seal with her ring, Drea found herself fascinated with the journal. "Where did you get this?" she finally asked.

Jolted from her hurried train of thought, Velanna gave Drea a surprised look. "Umm..Sigrun actually," she replied, caught off guard. As almost an afterthought, she added, "Dwarves take their history records extremely seriously and she was horrified at how much history the Dalish have lost. She actually gave me the journal so I could start keeping my own records. I could write down what I do know and track what I learn or experience. It was…a touching gesture actually." Before Drea could speak, Velanna cleared her throat and finished, "But back to the matter at hand. I was taking over for Nate on watch, but I think it would be best if I ran this into town. Sigrun will be upset that I didn't let her do this for you, but I'm the faster rider. I can be back by morning…"

"Go," Drea agreed, dropping the topic of the journal, "Arkon and Nara can stay on watch for the rest of the night." Arkon's ears perked up as he cocked his head at Drea. "Well you can, can't you?" she asked him. Raising his chin, he huffed in agreement as he pulled himself to his feet.

"Then it is settled," Velanna replied, moving to the entrance with Arkon at her heels. Turning to Nate, who was still standing with everything she had shoved at him, she added, "That's for her. She should eat." She left as he opened his mouth to reply.

Turning to Drea, he was painfully aware they were suddenly alone. Awkwardly, he approached her and handed her the bowl of soup. The smell of the stew instantly set her stomach growling and she had to force herself to eat slowly. Carefully, Nate knelt beside her and settled in while she ate. His unease was obvious as he silently watched her. Looking up from her food, she noticed not only were his eyes red but his normally neat hair was stringy and unkempt. Becoming self-conscious under her stare, he cleared his throat and ran his hand through his hair. "I've…never seen anyone look so broken before. I was afraid that you'd…"

Setting her empty bowl down, she offered a small smile before shuffling herself into her bedroll so she could comfortably lie down. Reaching over to rest her hand on his, she stared at the tent ceiling and started in a dreamy voice, "I get it now, you know. When I was dying…again…it became so obvious to me. All this time, I keep waiting for the madness to stop so I can breathe. I see how foolish that is now…it's not what this life is. I have to breathe with the madness. And I have to take the good moments as they come - the joy, the support, the love…" She took a slow, deep breath as she rolled her head his direction and looked up at him. His eyes were clouded from exhaustion and worry. It pulled at her heart. Quietly she added, "Moments like I have with you. I would like to have more of those…"

A tired smile crossed his lips as he slowly replied, "I'm one of your Wardens so I'm not going anywhere."

Squeezing his hand, she replied, "I don't mean like that. I…am just concerned how the others would take it…"

Looking down at her hand over his, he was somehow unflustered by her clumsy admission of her feelings. In an even tone, he asked, "Well…did your last group of companions mind?"

"No," she answered quickly. A thought occurred to her and after a short hesitation, she added, "Well…"

"Just one?" he guessed quietly. Her eyes narrowed at his odd comment, but she kept quiet. After a moment, he finished, "Leliana."

Faint alarm was on her face and in her voice as she replied in a hushed whisper, "I don't know what you're..." Instinctively, she started pulling her hand away.

Quickly, he clamped his over hand over hers, not letting her pull away as he interrupted, "Don't. Don't sully it. When we were all talking in the dining hall, I saw the look on your face when Oghren suggested you were talking about her. You covered it well, but I saw a flicker of pain and longing." Embarrassed, she broke eye contact and looked away. Still not freeing her hand, he pushed, "Our families were very different, but on this they were the same. We were both conditioned to believe this sort of thing is wrong. But Drea…we are all just souls housed in flesh and blood. And when one soul stares into the depths of another…and falls in love…it doesn't matter if the bodies are similar."

Her voice sounded distant as she slowly replied, "It's been a year since I've seen her. And I don't even know if she's still alive."

The air felt thick in the tent as the uncomfortable moment lingered on. Drea continued to stare at nothing until Nate finally sighed. "Drea…it was shortly after talking with my sister when I started to see the world clearly. My soul started seeing the world. And I saw you." His words pulled her from her far-off thoughts and finally she looked back up at him. The exhaustion in his eyes was replaced by his subtle intensity. "You were drowning and at times it was hard to reach you, but I knew you were there. But Drea…if your heart belongs to someone else, I won't…"

Squeezing her eyes closed, she shook her head and his words quietly died off. Slowly opening her eyes, she focused on their intertwined hands as she softly replied. "Healing magic is very interesting. I shouldn't be able to remember much, but I can remember everything. I remember you at my side, cradling my face in your hands…Do you want to know what I felt?" She paused long enough look from their hands up to his face. Inclining his head, he encouraged her, "I felt…warmth…and peace. It was a feeling I thought I had found in another but that had just turned out to be more hurt and turmoil. I don't think I'll ever stop caring about her but you…you found me when I didn't even know I was lost. I need you Nate. Please don't turn away from me now."

Looking down at her, he could see the sincerity shining in her eyes. Gently, he brought one hand up to brush the hair back from her face, appreciating her soft skin under his finger tips. "I won't," he promised as he leaned down to lightly brush his lips against her forehead.

The corners of her lips turned up into a satisfied smile as she sat up slightly, pressing her lips against his. Keeping her kiss light, she pulled away and murmured, "Stay with me?" Silently he nodded as he stared deeply into her eyes. Not able to pull her gaze from his, she brought the candle up to her lips and with a quick puff, blew the flame out.