Oh wow. Long time no update of this story. I'm getting back on track!
I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! GX or any of its characters.
Hope you enjoy! ^_^
Constructive criticisms are welcome.
Chapter 3 – Time
"Are you going to tell me?" Jim bit his lip as he look thoughtfully on the depressed brunette who had hope in his eyes.
Jim sits beside Judai. "It's… It's just you…"
"You already told me that." Judai snapped.
"No…" Jim let out an exasperated sigh. "Should I tell you?"
Judai whips his head to glare at Jim, eyes slightly changing into two colors. "Of course you should! If you won't give me any help, eat your own pity!"
"Judai, I do pity you – "
"Then go!" Judai shouted. "I can stand on my own two feet! I'm not like a baby who needs help to rise!"
Jim snorts but not a happy one. "You're acting too old though."
"Are you mocking me?"
Jim didn't answer, instead he stare at his friend's eyes, hoping to see the thing he is losing but please, Jim hopes, not lost.
Judai nods his head making a decision to not retort to Jim. He decided mature adult people would ignore other person's pity and mockery. "I'll go." He stands up without anymore words and starts to leave.
But Jim decided he will help, and even in the most obscene way he will. There are things people need to realize on their own. "Why Johan loves you?"
Judai didn't dare to move.
"Remember why." with that Jim stands up and walks past him without a goodbye. Why?
A hand-made rainbow colored card is pressed up very close to Judai's face as he read the words in it slowly. "…Blue for being a cool sun around of people, you give people warmth without hurting anyone.."
"Judai!" Johan hissed, his face tinted bright red. "Don't read it out loud!"
Judai looks up to Johan, confusion obvious on his face. "But we're alone here in the rooftop; I can actually shout and no one will hear."
Johan squeaked and the idea of Judai reading the things he wrote out loud embarrass him, though it makes his heart warm somehow. "I wrote embarrassing stuffs."
"There's nothing to be embarrassed about!" Judai quickly ran to the edge of the roof top. Johan tried to stop his boyfriend but Judai is quicker than him. Judai begin to read the last part out loud. "You have the confidence to be never ashamed of yourself." Judai continues feeling smug at Johan's protest on the background and feeling utterly warm at the words he's reading. "You are proud of what you have. You never force yourself to change into what will please people. You are simply yourself."
"Judai!" Johan shouted. He stands up and marches to Judai. "I told you. People can hear you!" He grabbed the card out of Judai's grasp. He receives a very sweet smile from Judai that made his heart warm and fly.
Judai embraced Johan and gave him a peck on the lips before telling him the last words on the card. "I love you. Never change."
Johan is very sure he's a red as Ruby's eyes. The flapping flock of butterflies on his stomach sure feels good. And he hopes this will never end. "Do you promise?" Judai blinks.
"Promise what?"
"Tha-that you'll never change?" Johan continues before Judai can answer. "I know that… people do change uncontrollably… I mean, someday… you might be taller than me." He saw his boyfriend grin up to ear. "That's impossible though." Judai's face fell and then he pouts. Johan give him a sheepish smile. "The rainbow inside you… should never change because… because it's beautiful Judai." His heart fluttered when Judai's cheeks tinged pink and his mouth formed a sweet curve.
"I'm tan."
It's Johan's turn to pout. "I'm not talking about your gorgeous form." He laughs at Judai's confused stare.
"Is that supposed to be a joke?" Johan didn't answer.
He pointed at Judai's chest where the heart is supposed to be located. "You…are a beautiful rainbow inside…" He pinches Judai's arms making the brunette yelp. "And a beautiful tan outside."
Johan admired the way Judai's eyes speak. It simply reflects what he feels. There's wonder in those eyes. Always willing to explore and learn new things, eyes that show confidence and care. The eyes that tell you to not be afraid to show what you have and what you do if it is from the sincere and pure part of your heart. The eyes Johan love the most. The eyes he could stare at forever.
Suddenly, Judai's eyebrows furrowed. "Am I gorgeous or what?"
Johan rose a teasing eyebrow "Let me contemplate that."
"Well, that didn't help." Judai muttered bitterly, he kicks a stray can out of his way. "It made all of this more depressing." He decided he would just go back to his apartment. He and Johan stays in two different apartments since Judai insist that he will be a disturbance to Johan if he is doing anything school or work related when Judai needs to rescue a spirit. "Memories…" Judai grimaced. "Memories of my immature self." Judai stops his own tracks and his grimace turned into sadness. "Maybe I'm not mature enough, maybe… maybe that's the reason Johan…Johan broke up with me." He squeezed his eyes shut to stop the tears from falling. "I'm not mature enough."
He continues his march to his apartment feeling more down than he had earlier. He practically slams his door shut and ungracefully throws his clothes onto the floor, not caring the slightest where it went. After slipping a new shirt, he groans and started picking up his scattered clothes. He needs to be neat. Mature adults are neat.
He fell asleep; hoping today is just a dream.
Judai woke up around 7 in the morning, just in time to hear his phone ringing, signaling an incoming call. He grabbed his phone from the bedside table and flips it open. He cleared his throat before speaking. "Hello?"
"Judai, good morning, I hope."
As if all of his energy jumped back at him, Judai sit up on his bed, feeling the warm emotion he is having whenever he hears Johan's voice.
"Judai… Judai?"
He wanted to listen to the voice all day but he got to let Johan knows he's there. "Johan," He remembered the last night's events and something pierce into his heart. Johan's well-being always goes first. "Are you feeling okay now? Why are you calling? You must be feeling tired. Do you need anything?"
He heard a soft giggle from Johan at the other end of the phone. He can't help but smile on his own. "I'm fine, Judai, in fact, I'm going back to my apartment."
"You are?"
He heard Johan giggled again. "I just said I'm going back to my apartment."
Judai feels his face heating up. "Yeah, well…" There are like those times again, those times where they would call each other dorms away. Making each other laugh, making each other smile, making each other feel sheepish and making each other feel love. "Do you need help?" Things are like before.
"Judai, I don't have full blown clothes here. I can manage."
Things are like before. Just like how he will make excuses to be near Johan. "Well, I just wanted to make sure…" Johan cut him off.
"Judai…" He heard Johan sighing on the other end. "I don't want to make you feel anymore awkward than it already had been." Maybe things are not like before, usually, Johan will jump at the opportunities to be with Judai himself.
Judai flops back to his bed, running a hand over his face. "It's not actually awkward."
"Is it?" Judai nods, then remembering that Johan can't see him, as if on cue Johan speaks. "It's not awkward… because we had been good friends before..."
"Before we fell in love." Judai finished for him.
There was a short pause that made Judai held his breath. "Yes." He breathed out. Was there any hope?
"I'll still visit you…we…we are still friends right?" Friend is a really great word, unless you are referring to an ex who you still love very much.
"Best friends, Judai." He felt a smile tugging on his lips. Maybe it's just like going back from the start?
"Yeah… don't go before I come there… I have to check you out or something from the hospital."
"I think you don't need to do that but yeah." There is this silence that they both used to feel the presence of each other even only on the phone. "I'll be waiting…"
"I really hope you will."
They didn't say goodbyes like before. They never say good bye to one another.
As he go on his way to the hospital, his conversation with Johan rerun on his head. And he hopes that Johan understands that he is sincere when he said the word 'hope'. He hopes Johan will wait. He hopes Johan remembers that he said he will wait too. He hopes he will figure this thing sooner. There are lots of things to hope for. He just hopes he's matured enough to face all this.
He wonders if that will even help.