Chapter Three

A/N I'm so sorry for my absence. Chapter three is here now, I hope you all enjoy!

-Shay

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Four long days had passed. They were so close they could almost taste it. The smell of fear radiated off the walls in the Ebon Hawk, and Revan found herself pacing once again. Her long hair was floating so lazily down her back, and her eyes were cast downwards. Was she bringing her friends to their deaths? Was this to be the end of everything? She sincerely hoped not. She didn't want to let them down, not now, not after everything they had gone through and everything that was coming. She needed them to believe in her, and most of all, she needed to believe in herself.

They would arrive at the Starforge in less than three days time, they would be there and welcoming everything they had feared with open arms. This was insanity. She could hardly breathe, it was a wonder she could pace so swiftly. She desperately longed for Bastila, but the woman had been kidnapped. Malak had taken her, and she had willingly given herself over so that Carth and Revan could escape and complete the task. Bastila wasn't dead, though. Revan would know if she was, she would just… know. Their bond allowed her that much.

Over the long weeks, she had learned to dull the pain of the bond when it struck her, but when they were nearer to each other, the feeling was harder to dull. Footsteps passing forced Revan's incandescent eyes upwards and she gazed towards the doorway. The footsteps came and went, and Revan returned to her pacing. She was uncomfortable in this situation, that much was for certain. She didn't want to be trapped like this, but there was nothing else she could do. There was nothing that she wanted to do, well no, that was a lie. She wanted to build some sort of time machine that would allow her to skip past all of this and witness the outcome.

It was in moments like this that she had always turned to Bastila, or to Carth. Out of the whole crew, those two were the ones that she was closest with, and the ones she cared most for. However, it was now in her time of need, that they were both gone. Carth was still refusing to speak with her, and Bastila was somewhere… Unknown. Revan wanted to find Bastila before the end of this, she didn't know what she would do without the Jedi. She wouldn't have gotten this far, that much was for certain.

The footsteps returned, and Revan paused in her steps, watching the door. Suddenly, a shadow darkened the room, and as the silhouette grew closer, she realized who it was. Breathing out a sigh of relief, Revan returned to her pacing. "Think I was somebody else?" the gruff voice asked, and Revan smiled. She shook her head as she moved.

After several moments of silence, she stopped and looked Canderous directly in the eye. "Do you think this is the end?" she asked, her voice meager and weak, it was the most she had shown of her fear yet. She didn't want to let the crew know just how scared she was, but she was indeed terrified. Canderous watched her for a moment, and Revan paused in her steps once more, watching him just as intently.

"No, I don't think this is the end. I think there's still plenty for us to do, but that means we've got to be willing to try."

Blinking in surprise, Revan found herself getting upset. She felt red hot fury gripping her insides, and she couldn't help it. The control she had spent so long working up was failing, and the anxiety and fear she had been feeling fueled her following actions.

"You think I'm not trying, Canderous? You think that I'm not trying to make sure every second of every day that these people are safe? That you are safe? Oh, I'm trying. I'm trying my damndest, but that doesn't mean I can keep going! Half the crew is afraid of me because I was somebody I don't even remember being, the other half… They hate me for the same reason! I can't do this! I can't be a leader to a crew who's afraid of me, and who hates me!" she shouted, and immediately there were more footsteps, frantic footsteps, running towards the crew quarters.

Canderous shook his head. "I didn't say you can't do this, Rev. I said we have to try. And we're gonna win."