Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in this story. At all.
Warning: Shounen-ai, homosexual relationships, etc, etc.
Author's Note: This is late and I'm sorry. For those of you who follow GC then you know the lateness of this is attributed to me having a second job. For those of you who don't follow GC, the lateness of this is attributed to me having a second job. Because I now have two jobs and school, the chapters are going to slow down. My guess is a new chapter will surface every month to month and a half.
On the upside (there is an upside!), the semester is halfway over. Once summer hits, it'll be back to a chapter every two weeks. I promise I won't just abandon my stories or suddenly disappear. If you think it's been a long while since an update, check my profile because I've probably posted some sort of message to the readers.
Please feel free to send me a private message or e-mail me if nothing is posted. I check my e-mail three times a day. I can't promise I'll respond quickly (I forget), but I'll do my best to keep everyone informed. Anyway – onward to story!
This is an edit so looky-look here: So, this is late. Extra-late. Do you know when I put this on ffnet? Like a week ago. And that stupid error has raped me in the behind for the past week. I'm really sorry about all the trouble. I'm sorry if the story looks wonky, too. Apparently investing in an I.T. team that's worth a damn is low on ffnet's to-do list. I don't know if I'm going to continue to have trouble posting. I hope not, but we'll see. Okay, NOW onward to story!
Summary: Axel thinks Aesop taught decent lessons in his fables, but the redhead is willing to bet he could do better. What good are fables that teach things like "attempt not impossibilities" or "little friends may prove great friends" anyway? Times are different from when Aesop lived and Axel thinks it's time for a new set of fables. All of which will be authored by himself, of course, because he's an expert on love, life, and what truly matters.
That, and Roxas Badcock promised to marry him if he gets his book published.
Axel's Fables
•••
•••
By: Freekiwi
XI – He Becomes a Bit Weatherworn
Another hash mark, another day. If he could be bothered to count all the hash marks he had made since he left the duplex, he would be able to say for sure when he had run away. But because it really bothered him that he was afraid to go home, he didn't want to count how many days it had been since he had turned into a coward.
He had seen Riku in passing and dutifully ignored him. When he caught sight of blond or spiked hair, he tried to make himself as small and unnoticeable as possible (which was a definite challenge for someone as tall and wild looking as he was). He had stopped staying with Kairi and Naminé because they had tried multiple times to set him up so that he would be forced to talk to Roxas. Even though he knew it was only a matter of time before the girls attempted something like that, he was still offended when he had been forced to make eye contact with Roxas before quickly taking off in the other direction.
He was being a baby.
And what was worse was everyone knew it.
"You can't hide forever."
Axel made a noise in his throat and mentally scolded himself when he realized he had been absentmindedly sketching Roxas' face. He quickly scratched it out with the red ink of his pen and then he tapped the end of the pen irritably against the kitchen table. Zexion leaned against the counter across from him, a coffee cup in his hand and his hair a wild mess.
"You can't continue to live here."
Axel curled his fingers in his long locks of red hair and gently tugged. "Get off my back, Zex. I'm really not in the mood right now." He hadn't been sleeping well. He hadn't slept at all the night before and though it was Monday and he had class, he wasn't going. He hadn't gone to any of his classes in almost two weeks.
Because Axel only pretended he didn't care much about anyone but himself. He was really good at fooling everyone into thinking his interior was just as tough and hard as his exterior. But he was a softie at heart. He was a hopeless romantic and hopelessly retarded when it came to love and Roxas Badcock.
"Mhm, that's nice," he stated casually, a gentle sigh following his statement. "You're really hurting my chances with Demyx, you know."
"In case you hadn't noticed," Axel responded through gritted teeth. "Demyx is my boyfriend." He knew Zexion was baiting him. A few weeks back, he and the smaller boy had gotten into a rather explosive argument and Demyx, after breaking them up, had made it very clear that if they couldn't get along then Axel would have to leave.
But only because Zexion paid rent and Axel didn't. Not because maybe Demyx was construing his lust for Axel as love and not because maybe Demyx was just the slightest bit smitten with Zexion.
However, Zexion's lack of people skills meant he didn't construe the blonde's actions as anything more than loyalty to their longtime friendship. So now the schemer spent his time baiting Axel into fights and the redhead, knowing he could no longer safetly stay with Kairi and Naminé, had no choice but to deal with Zexion's repeated attempts to get the redhead to strike him. Generally, Axel kept his cool, but this morning was a bad one and his patience was thin.
It was the end of March. He had been gone from the duplex since the end of January. He hadn't seen Roxas except once. And Zexion was trying to shove him off the metaphorical edge he was currently standing on.
"I'm well aware, but let's be honest. Who's really better for him? The cowardly redhead who's using him for sex or the –"
Zexion smirked when Axel stood from the table and began throwing his things haphazardly into his backpack. He now carried the book bag everywhere with him because he was, essentially, homeless. By choice, of course, but that didn't make things any less difficult for him.
"What's the matter?" Zexion cooed. "Did I hit a nerve?"
Axel let his backpack fall to the floor and he made his way over to the shorter boy. He gripped the front of his shirt and the satisfied look that crossed the slate haired boy's features made Axel only want to strike him more. He was being pushed and he knew he shouldn't respond. He knew Zexion was just baiting him. He knew Demyx would side with Zexion regardless of what the other had done to enrage the fiery redhead.
"Are you going to hit me?" he asked. "By all means, please do."
It took Axel everything to release the other and walk away. It took him all his will-power to scoop his backpack off the floor and continue to put his things away. It took every ounce of self-control to not knock that smug, self-satisfied look off Zexion's stupid face.
"You know Leon gave me a bit of interesting information…" He sipped his coffee and watched Axel carefully. "Something about Roxas being the love of your life?"
The redhead ignored him.
"You know, if I was Demyx I'd feel pretty betrayed if my boyfriend was off proclaiming his love for someone else. And, correct me if I'm mistaken, but weren't you involved in a bit of infidelity with a blond? Is it safe to say that blond was Roxas?"
The name did something to Axel. He couldn't describe what, but it did something to him that he didn't much like.
"I suppose we could keep this between us if you do the right thing and eradicate yourself from Demyx's life, but…" Zexion smirked. "But if you choose to continue to take what's rightfully mine, I'll have to spill the beans. It's my duty as his best friend."
Axel shook his head and mumbled something quite disparaging under his breath. He slung his backpack over his shoulders and he excited the kitchen, Zexion following a few paces behind him. He followed far enough away so that Axel couldn't turn around and smack him.
"So?" Zexion asked, his voice even. "Am I going to have to tell Demyx or are you going to leave?"
The redhead snorted and opened the front door. He didn't know where he was going. He just wanted to get away from Zexion. "Get Demyx to believe you and then maybe we'll talk." He walked out and slammed the door behind him as he left.
And Zexion was left glaring at the spot where Axel had just stood. He hated knowing that Axel knew Demyx just as well as he did. He hated knowing that the redhead was right. Demyx, currently blinded by love and lust, refused to believe anything truly heinous about Axel. It certainly didn't help that Zexion and Demyx were still, technically, fighting. Though they occasionally talked (because, though he hated himself for admitting it, Zexion needed Demyx in his life), things were still tense between them.
And he knew enough about his best friend to know the blond would be very suspicious if Zexion suddenly told him Axel had a humungous thing for Roxas. Especially when Demyx knew how Zexion felt about him and how much he and Axel disliked one another.
He ambled back into the kitchen and refilled his coffee cup. He could hear the soft strumming of a sitar on the upper floor and he knew that meant Demyx must be awake. He grabbed another cup from the cabinet nearby and filled it with coffee and then he made his way over to the fridge and grabbed out a carton of milk. Demyx hated black coffee. Zexion loved it.
As he made his way back over to the counter, he stepped on a tattered notebook that laid on the kitchen floor. He bent down and retrieved the abused-looking thing and he knew immediate that this was Axel's notebook and he knew, from Demyx, that it was filled with all the fables the redhead had written.
Zexion set the milk carton down on the kitchen table and opened the notebook out of curiosity. Though he had stoutly refused to read anything written by someone as idiotic as Axel, he had always been just the smallest bit interested in how good and clever a writer the redhead was.
But because fate had a way of making things absolutely terrible for Axel, the first page Zexion flipped to was a page the redhead had dedicated solely to his love for Roxas.
This was exactly what Zexion needed.
••••••••••••••
"Who the hell is calling you?" Sora mumbled groggily as he sat up in his boyfriend's bed and ran his hand through his tangled mess of hair. Originally the brunet thought Riku had set an alarm for eight in the morning. However, the continuous vibrating and ringing of the other's phone told him otherwise.
Riku, who usually had his phone on silent, mumbled something into his pillow before hanging his arm off the bed and blindly feeling for his buzzing phone. Once he had it (and it had stopped ringing), he flipped it open and turned it off.
But Sora was curious (and now awake) and he waited for his boyfriend to give some sort of explanation for the disturbance.
Riku, however, was content enough to continue to lay face-down in bed. He didn't have class until noon and he and Sora had been up quite late last night.
"Was it work?" Sora prodded.
"Don't worry about it." Riku yawned and turned over onto his back. A small sigh left his lips when Sora didn't lie back down in bed and, instead, chose to stare at him with a somewhat accusing look.
"Don't worry about it?" the brunet asked. "Someone just called you fifty thousand million times at eight in the morning. How do I not worry about that? How come you're not worried about that?"
Riku shrugged.
"Why can't I know?" Sora asked, clearly offended by his boyfriend's lack of trust in him.
"Sor, it's not a big deal," he half-whined. "Just go back to sleep."
"If it's not a big deal, why can't I know?"
Riku gave the brunet a look. "Because it is so extremely insignificant that the universe is liable to implode if I spend time telling you about it."
"Oh." Sora nodded his head. "Right. That makes sense."
His boyfriend sat up in bed. "What?" He raised his brows questioningly. "What, really?"
"Yea." Sora nodded and threw the blankets off himself. "Because like any good boyfriend who has been wronged by his partner before, I now have to assume something else is going on."
Riku made a disgusted noise and grabbed Sora's arm when he tried to get out of bed. "Whoa, whoa, wait a second. You think I'm cheating on you?"
The brunet shrugged and looked away to mask the hurt that crossed his features. "What am I supposed to think?" he mumbled quietly.
Riku blushed. "I…" He wanted to be offended, but he knew better. He knew Sora had a right to be suspicious of him and his recent strange behavior. "I'm sorry. I'm not…" He sighed. "It's nothing like that, Sor. I just…"
The brunet glanced at the other, his blue eyes wide. "You know it's okay to be honest with me." Sora grasped Riku's hand and intertwined their fingers.
He squeezed the brunet's hand and sighed softly. "I know, I know. It's just… I don't tell anyone anything. I don't like spreading my dirty laundry all around."
A little smile curled Sora's lips upward. "I'm not anyone, Ri. I'm your boyfriend. Your dirty laundry is my dirty laundry." He shrugged his shoulders. "Everyone comes with baggage. The beauty in having someone who isn't anyone is that they can lighten your load."
Riku thought about this for a moment. He supposed back in high school, when he and Sora had been together, there had always been a certain distance between them. He knew it was his fault. He never told Sora much of anything because he was afraid of mistakenly admitting to cheating. Riku was also exceptionally fearful of rejection.
He hated being judged. He wanted to be perfect so there was nothing to judge. This was why he never told Axel anything. This was why he never told Sora anything. Rejection followed judgment and Riku had learned that being wholly honest with someone could be especially dangerous.
"You know, Riku…" The brunet squeezed his boyfriend's hand and leaned forward to place a brief kiss to his mouth. "We've been through Hell together. There's not much you could say or do now that would really shock me."
A little smile crossed the older boy's face because he knew it was true. Leave it to Sora to be the ever honest, ever present voice of reason. Leave it to Sora to break down complicated situations into easy, digestible pieces.
"It's my dad," Riku said finally. He stared at their laced fingers. "He's been calling me since…" He paused. He wanted to lie because he didn't want Sora to be mad at him for not being honest beforehand. However, he knew the truth had a way of muscling its way into his life unannounced and sniffing out his deceit. "Since October, maybe September. The calls stopped once my phone just… disappeared, but now he's calling again."
Sora raised a brow. "So just answer the phone."
He looked at the brunet as if he had just suggested Riku go outside and hula-hoop completely naked. "Um, no. He's fucking insane."
Sora frowned and made his way into Riku's lap. He sat sideways in-between his boyfriend's legs and wrapped his sun-kissed arms around the other's pale neck. "Wasn't he in jail?"
"Yea." He wrapped his arms around Sora's waist and held him close. "He killed my mom."
Sora didn't hide his shock. "Whoa… Okay, new plan. Don't answer your phone."
Riku smiled slightly and nuzzled his face into the other's mess of chocolate brown hair. "Good plan, Sor."
"But… Shouldn't he still be in jail if he killed your mom?"
"He didn't go to jail for that. Before he was arrested he told me he killed her, but by then it had been nearly three years and…" Riku paused. "And how in the world was anyone going to prove that?"
Sora shifted slightly and pressed a gentle kiss to Riku's neck. "What was he arrested for?"
"DWI. It was his third one within three years or something like that so they arrested him. He didn't bother fighting it. After my mom died, he… He sort of lost it. He was always an emotionally abusive fuck, but after she died he took to heavy drinking. My dad was like me," he explained. "He was smart like me, I mean. He was manipulative like me. But then he drank and his mind was just kind of everywhere. It was a relief when he was arrested."
Sora ignored the nagging voice that wanted him to ask why Riku had never told him any of this before. The brunet supposed it wasn't that big of a deal, but he couldn't help but be just a little bit offended that his boyfriend had never shared with him. He also couldn't help but wonder how much Riku had told Roxas, if anything at all.
There would always be competition between him and Roxas even if they weren't competing.
"Why don't you see what he wants?" Sora asked carefully.
Riku paused. "Because he's a psycho. Chances are he just got out of jail and is looking for a handout or something."
Sora frowned and rolled this over in his mind. He played with a strand of the other's silver hair and then breathed a small sigh. "Or maybe he wants to apologize. You said he sort of lost it when your mom died, right? So maybe he lied when he said he killed her. Maybe he's looking to be honest with you and have something with you."
Riku didn't think so. He didn't bother mentioning his father had manipulated him into hating his mother. He didn't bother mentioning that because he knew Sora well enough to know that his boyfriend would begin to psycho-analyze him and then stumble upon a realization Riku had stumbled upon a long time ago.
Roxas was abused just like he had been and though they never talked about it (mostly because Roxas would be hard-pressed to admit his mother was purposefully harming him), Riku had sensed there was something… different about Roxas and Naminé. Compared to Kairi and Sora, the two of them were… paler. They always looked sicker, thinner, much more frail then their tanned, bright-eyed siblings who chattered incessantly and never felt the need to have secrets.
There was also guilt behind Roxas' eyes and Riku had seen it from the very beginning. It was the same look he had in his own eyes.
They were both haunted and no matter how close Sora and Riku were, he and Roxas would always share this commonality.
"I won't pressure you. I just think that everyone deserves a chance to redeem themselves."
Riku considered this carefully. Sora was right. His father probably did deserve a second chance or at least a chance to fully explain himself. Riku also supposed that maybe a little bit of closure wouldn't be the worst thing for him. He had a bad habit of living in the past and maybe this would help him move on.
"Maybe…" he mumbled, his arms tightening around Sora's waist. "But let's talk about something else. Namely, why your boxers are on."
The brunet gave his boyfriend a look. "Creepy. Talking about your deadbeat dad puts you in the mood. You're lucky I'm not judgmental."
Riku didn't bother explaining that sex was just a really, really, really good distraction from life and all its problems.
Axel taught him that.
••••••••••••••
His hood was pulled over his head and his blond hair was mashed into a flattened mess. He was slightly wet because he had just been caught in a rainstorm that had appeared from nowhere. It was mid-afternoon and it had been relatively sunny all morning and though his sisters had warned him that there was a chance of rain, Roxas had decided against bringing an umbrella along with him to his classes.
And now he was stuck inside of a nearby bookstore waiting for the rain to let up so he could go back home to the duplex and sulk, think about Axel, sulk some more, toy with the idea of texting or calling him, and then sulk because he was too prideful to actually do anything like that. And then maybe he'd eat something and sleep.
This was how it had been for him since Axel had left.
He yanked the hood of his sweatshirt from his head and ran a hand through his hair in an attempt to make it look halfway decent. He began walking through an aisle of books, his eyes scanning the titles with some interest, and when he breathed a little sigh, he noticed how quiet the bookstore was. No music played overhead and the people in the store were either completely silent or chatting very quietly amongst themselves.
Thunder boomed outside and Roxas knew it would be a while before he would be able to go home.
He walked through another aisle, mumbling "excuse me" to a young girl as he stepped over her outstretched legs. She sat with her back against one of the book shelves, a comic book in her hands and her eyes scanning each word with hunger. Roxas noticed her eyes were green like Axel's, but they were nowhere near as vibrant.
They were nowhere near as deep.
He made his way down another aisle of books and then over to a number of large, leather chairs that had been placed in a secluded area of the bookstore. The chairs sat back-to-back to one another and Roxas, hardly one to read books, grabbed a random book off one of the shelves he passed and sat in one of the comfortable chairs.
A grimace crossed his features when he realized he had grabbed a self-help book entitled You, Your Mother, and Your Emotional Baggage. It certainly seemed like fate was teasing him and he didn't much appreciate it. Roxas stood and quickly made his way over to a shelf where he could dump the book. It wasn't like anyone knew the details of his personal life or anything, but he still felt somewhat embarrassed by his random selection. He felt judged despite no one being around.
"I didn't know you could read."
The hair on the back of his neck stood when he heard Axel's voice. He knew his eyes were extremely wide and he knew how stupid he must've looked with his hand still touching the top edge of the silly self-help book. A blush crossed his cheeks and he quickly jerked his hand back, causing not only the self-help book but also three other books to come crashing down to the ground.
Roxas and Axel both bent down to retrieve them from the floor and the blond couldn't help but notice how close they were. He couldn't help but notice that Axel had a little stubble, that his eyes had dark circles underneath them, that he looked exhausted and weatherworn and a little bit like a stray. His hair was lacking in its normal, vibrant color and his jade eyes were rimmed red.
Roxas stood when Axel did and he found himself to be even more embarrassed when he realized he hadn't even picked any of the books up. But Axel either didn't notice or didn't care and he placed each book back in its place before giving Roxas a long, unreadable stare. The silence between them became awkward and it wasn't helped when the blond nervously cleared his throat.
"So…" Axel muttered.
"You look terrible," Roxas blurted.
"Thanks, Rox. That's exactly what I was going for." He swayed on his feet slightly and leaned against the bookshelf for support. He was exhausted. He had left Demyx and Zexion's house early in the morning and he had been very hesitant to return because he was still very, very on edge. Seeing Roxas was…
Well, his brain was a little too tired to deal with it sensibly. He was torn between wanting to yell and wanting to ask why the hell Roxas hadn't asked him to come home. Axel also wanted to know why Roxas looked so good when he looked like absolute shit. Why was love so cruel to him and yet it did nothing to faze the petite blond before him?
"Are… are you okay?" he asked, concern crossing his pale features.
"Never been better."
Roxas stared. "Dude, you look like you're about to pass out."
Axel shrugged. "Just a little sleep deprived, you know?"
Roxas couldn't say he did. He spent the majority of his time lounging around in his bed or on the couch. He spent his days lazing about. Exhaustion, unless it was of the emotional kind, had never been much of a problem for him.
"Why don't you just come home?" he asked hesitantly. "You're essentially homeless right now. You realize that, don't you?"
"Not homeless. I'm just in-between homes."
Roxas refrained from pointing out that that was homelessness. "Axel, come on. Wouldn't it be nice to just come back?"
The redhead frowned and looked down at his feet. He wanted to nod his head, to affirm Roxas' question, and to soothe his every worry and fear. He wanted to break down and tell the blond how awful it was trying to live with Demyx and Zexion and how he barely slept and how he hated not having a room. He wanted to shake Roxas like a ragdoll and yell at him for forcing Axel into complete and utter emotional turmoil.
But he didn't. Instead he rubbed his face and shrugged.
"Why don't you just come back for a nap?" Roxas suggested carefully. "You look so tired, Axel…"
God, he really was.
"Please?" he breathed. "Then you can leave again and I won't… I won't stop you."
Axel shifted on his feet and noticed that his head was feeling rather large and heavy. He ran a hand through his red locks of hair and then he rubbed at one of his jade colored eyes. Going home with Roxas sounded nice. Curling up in bed with him sounded even nicer. Being able to hold him – and be held by him – sounded something close to perfection.
"I don't want to see Riku."
Roxas nodded eagerly. "No, fine. I'll… I'll make sure Sora preoccupies him." He dug around in his pocket for his cell phone and when he fished it out, he quickly sent a message to his twin that said something like, "Axel sleep over. Occupy your bitch."
And Sora responded, "Damn. And here I thought the four of us could have a make-up orgy."
••••••••••••••
By the time he awoke, it was dark and the rainstorm from earlier had not let up. Had his mind not been fogged, Axel would've found it amusing that rainstorms seemed to lead to Roxas and him sleeping together in the same bed.
He sat up and rubbed at his green eyes. He barely remembered walking from the bookstore to the duplex and he didn't remember stripping down to his boxers and climbing into bed. Though his exhaustion had stemmed mostly from the fact that he had stayed up all night, it didn't help that sleeping with Demyx was difficult. Demyx, unlike Roxas, moved around a lot in his sleep. He also dreamed in a vocal manner and while Axel was usually heavily amused by sleep-talk, he found it grated on his nerves night after night.
He glanced at the clock on the bedside table and made a face when the time read '3:45 A.M.' in bold, red writing. He ran a hand through his tangled mess of hair and then turned his attention to the sleeping mass next to him. Roxas had stripped down to his boxers too and a thin, white sheet covered his body from his waist down.
He looked absolutely delectable and Axel had to begin an internal battle of what he should do next. Stay and face possible questioning / suffering whenever Roxas woke up or dissipate into the night and pretend like this didn't happen? His brain was picking the latter, but his heart was putting up a pretty strong fight for the first option. And his other head was attempting to bring in a third option which was seriously clouding Axel's judgment.
He pulled the sheet off his body and slipped from the bed. The redhead stretched his limbs and cringed slightly when his joints cracked. Stay or leave? Stay or leave? Stay or leave?
You haven't seen him in months. And he's so sorry! He was very nice to you in the bookstore and you know how he normally is. Axel's heart argued.
Leave his ass. He's a cheating, backstabbing whore. He stabbed his brother in the back and he and your best friend lied to you about what happened for months. Axel's brain insisted.
But that's over and done with! And, besides, he was so young! They both were. What do you really expect from a couple of kids? Especially Roxas! You know he was emotionally abused…
Hey. At fourteen, fifteen – whatever – kids know cheating is wrong. And that was his brother. His own flesh and blood. His TWIN. And if he can do that to family, what the hell do you think he'll do to you? Probably get all your best friends together and have a massive orgy in the middle of the living room. And you're not invited to said orgy. So fuck him.
Axel rolled his eyes.
Don't listen to him. That's some fucked up shit he's talking about. You should really let Roxas explain himself. Maybe try talking to him about what actually happened instead of getting bits and pieces from Sora and Riku. You should give him a chance. He's trying to give you a chance.
PFT! That asshole has been giving you hell since day one! He's been a little shit to you since the beginning! He didn't wanna give you a chance ever! But now that you don't want him, NOW he's all interested! He's a drama queen! He's still stuck in high school! As soon as you show him that you want him, he'll be all, "Ew, gross, I hate you."
Okay. How about this? Either you stay and give Roxas a chance or I'll stop pumping your blood.
Axel raised his brows. How much sleep had he missed out on exactly? He was giving his brain and heart a dialogue. He was imagining this argument happening. He wished he was tripping on drugs because this would have made a lot more sense.
This isn't a joke. Sit your ass down on that bed.
His heart gave a painful lurch and Axel wasn't sure if this was his imagination going way, way too far or if this shit was actually happening to him for real. It was possible that maybe Zexion slipped him something. Or perhaps he had just been spending WAY too much time with Demyx who happened to give voice to every body part. On more than one occasion, the blond had made Axel talk to his toes (each toe had a face and hair and had Axel not been trying to do homework, he would've found this highly entertaining).
He sat on the edge of the bed and put his face in his hands. Thunder boomed outside and a strike of lightning lit up the bedroom. Axel breathed a little sigh and his heart nearly did stop when he felt a warm hand grasp his shoulder.
"Sorry, sorry," Roxas mumbled. "I didn't mean to scare you."
Axel could hear the smile on his face. "Jesus. How long have you been awake?"
"Long enough to hear you mumbling to yourself…" He wrapped his arms around Axel's waist and pressed his cheek against the other's upper back. "Were you going to leave?"
"I was thinking about it, but then my heart threatened me and –"
Roxas' brows came together. "Your heart threatened you?"
Axel laughed at the absurdity. "I guess I should lay off the crack," he joked.
They fell silent. Rain pattered on the roof and windows and thunder rumbled outside. Axel felt Roxas' arms tighten around his waist and heat flooded to the redhead's cheeks. It wasn't like him to blush, but it wasn't like Roxas to be so… touchy-feely. It was usually Axel who had to initiate their tender moments. It was usually Axel who cuddled Roxas. And it was usually Roxas who was blushing.
"I've missed you."
Axel stiffened and then relaxed. He felt Roxas shift behind him and he was rather pleased when he felt soft, warm kisses being pressed to his shoulders.
"Roxas..." he breathed. There was no thought process involved when he moved his head slightly to the left to allow the blond a little more room for his gentle kisses.
"I wish you'd come home," Roxas mumbled. He nipped teasingly at the junction of flesh between Axel's neck and shoulder. A satisfied smirk crossed his lips when Axel dug his nails unintentionally into Roxas' hand. It felt good. Being kissed by Demyx was nice (as was being kissed by anyone), but being kissed by Roxas was different.
Being kissed by Roxas was like fireworks. Like miniature explosions that sent waves of heat flooding through his body. Being kissed by Roxas left Axel feeling like his legs were made of jelly and it left him feeling like his brain was melting out through his ears. Being kissed by Roxas transformed Axel from a suave, charismatic troublemaker to a blabbering idiot who couldn't form a proper sentence.
And Roxas would swear there was no difference between suave, charismatic troublemaker Axel and blabbering idiot Axel.
"It's torture without you here," the blond mumbled. He pressed a small kiss under Axel's ear and saw goose bumps line the redhead's skin.
"So I leave and now you want me?" he asked playfully.
Roxas shrugged and slipped his arms from around Axel's waist. He took a seat next to the other on the edge of the bed and grabbed his hand, intertwining their fingers and giving a little squeeze. Roxas pressed a kiss to Axel's shoulder and watched him carefully.
"Are you still angry?" the blond asked hesitantly.
"Yea."
Roxas blushed at the other's unabashed honesty. "I'm really sorry, Axel."
The redhead shrugged and pulled his hand out of Roxas' grasp. The blond was extremely hurt by this and though he wanted to hide it, he couldn't. The past few months had been hell and Roxas had been suffering extreme emotional strain. There was no hiding how he felt now and given that it was pretty clear how they both felt, what was the point in even trying to hide?
"Axel…"
He didn't look at the smaller boy. He didn't want to see the pain and hurt and rejection reflected in those beautiful, blue eyes. He stood up from the bed and grabbed his jeans from the floor. Roxas immediately slid from the edge of the bed and placed a hand on Axel's arm. And, because he knew he had made a mistake in coming here, Axel pulled away from him.
"You said you wouldn't stop me if I wanted to leave."
"I lied."
The redhead rolled his eyes. "There's a surprise."
He could actually feel the hurt in Roxas' eyes and it made him feel very dirty and very guilty. He buttoned and zipped his jeans and when he began to look for his shirt, Roxas stepped in front of him and wrapped his arms tenderly around Axel's neck.
And because Axel was retarded in love, he wrapped his arms around Roxas' waist and crushed the blond boy impossibly close to his body. The urge to projectile vomit came over him, but he wasn't sure if it was because of the absolute repulsion that Roxas and Riku had slept together or because Roxas turned his stomach into a breeding ground for butterflies.
"I know about your mom…" He felt Roxas tense considerably, but the blond didn't attempt to pull away. "Sora told me a little about her. I didn't –"
"Please, Axel…"
Heat flooded to the redhead's cheeks. Roxas sounded extremely weak and vulnerable and the fragility of his voice caused Axel to feel somewhat embarrassed. He ran his hands soothingly up and down the blonde's back and he pressed a soft kiss to the top of his head. He felt Roxas tangle his hands in his mess of red hair and the touch was very soothing.
"We can't ignore this, Roxy."
Roxas pulled away, but the action did not drip with teenaged defiance.
"My mom…" He swallowed thickly. "It's not what you think. My siblings were… They were jealous. I was the favorite, you know."
Roxas didn't sound so sure about this. He looked at Axel briefly, pleadingly, and then he looked down at his feet. He crossed his arms nervously over his chest and didn't say much else. Axel reached out and placed a hand on Roxas' shoulder, offering a gentle squeeze.
"You need to deal with this," the redhead said carefully.
"There's nothing to deal with," he stated defensively. He slipped from under Axel's grasp and paced the length of the bedroom nervously. "Sora's just… He didn't understand our relationship. And… and the only thing we need to deal with right now is us. My mom has nothing to do with you and me and you leaving."
Axel made a face. "Yea, but what you did with Riku had something to do with her."
Apparently he had hit a nerve. Roxas glared at him angrily and his words were laced with venom. "Does that matter?" he hissed.
"Yea, it does!" he yelled. He hadn't meant to, but he had been on edge all day. The tender moment he and Roxas were sharing was gone and now they were arguing. "Because she fucked you up! And I'm willing to bet we would be able to actually be something if you weren't so in denial about what your mom really was!"
"Shut up!" Roxas yelled back. His face held a mixture of anguish and rage. "You don't know what you're talking about!"
Axel's brow furrowed and he crossed his arms over his chest. Roxas had stopped pacing and stood a few steps away. "I know enough to know that you're emotionally damaged because of your mom, and I know that's why you won't let me be anything to you!"
The blond shook his head. "She has nothing to do with you and me!" he insisted.
"Oh my God, Roxas, yes she does! She told you to break Sora and Riku up! She made you attack your brother's relationship! She abused your trust and she used you! You can't be happy because you won't be honest about what happened! You –"
"Shut up, Axel!" Roxas yelled.
The redhead looked somewhat shocked by the other's ferocity.
"Let me be honest with you then!" the blond raged. "Before my mom died, I told her I hated her! I told her I hoped I would never see her again! And she came into my room before she left and… and you know what she did?" His chest rose and fell quickly with each rapid breath. "She told me she was sorry! She told me she loved me and that I was her favorite! And you know what I did? I lied there and said nothing and then she died!"
Axel flinched and heat flooded to his cheeks. The feeling that he was spying rose in his chest and he awkwardly ran his fingers through his mess of red hair. He looked away from Roxas and the heat in his cheeks increased when the other continued to shout.
"And maybe, Axel… Maybe we can't have anything between us because you just up and left me without a word! My mom died and you were nowhere to be found!"
He tore his gaze from the floor and looked at Roxas quite indignantly. He opened his mouth to argue, but the blond shook his head.
"I know you moved and… and I know that that wasn't your fault, but you never told me! You didn't even say goodbye! Stupid Riku knew you were gone before I did and I had to hear it from him! I had to hear that you had abandoned me from him!"
"I didn't abandon you!" Axel yelled. He was now furious. "And I didn't say anything to you because I became friends with Riku and you stopped hanging out with me! How the fuck was I supposed to know you guys had fucked around behind Sora's back and that you hated him?"
Roxas blushed. "We lived in the same neighborhood! You knew where I lived and you could've –"
"What about the letter?" Axel yelled. "Are you just going to pretend you never got the letter I wrote you?"
The blond opened his mouth to retort, but then he fell silent. He looked at the other with confusion and Axel felt anger burn inside him.
"He… Riku never gave you the letter, did he?"
Roxas thought carefully about this and when he didn't recall ever receiving a letter from Riku, he shook his head slowly. "No…" he whispered. "No, I … I guess not."
"I'm going to fucking kill him."
By the time Roxas' brain bothered to comprehend what the redhead had said, Axel was already yanking his bedroom door open and making his way across the living room. Roxas immediately followed after him, his cries of "wait, hold on a second" going completely unheeded.
Axel couldn't accurately describe how angry he was. Though he had come to acknowledge and accept the fact that Roxas did play a part in helping Riku cheat on Sora, he still largely let all the blame for what had happened fall on Riku. He hated the way Riku had told him, he hated the way Riku had hid it from him, and he hated the way Riku had refused to make it any better.
And now… And now he had to deal with this. He had to deal with Riku not even giving Roxas his letter and Roxas believing Axel truly had just up and left town without talking to him. This certainly explained why Axel had never been able to get in touch with Roxas and why Roxas had been ignoring him for the past four years. This explained why the blond pretended not to know him and why he acted like Axel was a massive pain in the ass.
He stomped up the steps and made his way into the upper portion of the duplex. Roxas was nearly on top of him, telling him to be rational and telling him it was four-something in the morning. But Axel didn't care. Riku had stabbed him in the back enough times already. Knowing that Riku was the main source in why his and Roxas' friendship dissolved was only rubbing salt in the still open wound Axel was suffering.
He barged into Riku's room and turned the light on. Sora and Riku, who were cuddled and lying in the silver haired boy's bed, both stirred.
"Get up," Axel growled.
Riku sat up, groggy and confused. Sora sat up next to him and a gasp passed his lips when his boyfriend was suddenly being yanked out of bed and shoved roughly against the wall of his bedroom. Roxas, eyes wide with shock, stood by the door, unsure of what to do. Sora immediately climbed off Riku's bed and was glad he and his boyfriend had decided to sleep in their boxers and not naked.
"Where's the letter?" Axel asked through gritted teeth.
Riku, still very out of it, stared at Axel. "What? Are you fucking insane?"
"Axel, what are you doing?" Sora asked from a few steps away. He saw the fire behind the redhead's eyes and he knew better than to attempt to break them up. If he needed to, he would, but he didn't want to ratchet the situation up any farther than it already was. "What's going on?" He shot Roxas a look and Roxas looked down at the floor.
Axel ignored Sora. "When I moved away to Carmine, I gave you a letter to give to Roxas, remember?"
Riku searched his memory for this moment. He was too tired for this. He was still really out of it and instead of giving an answer, he sort of shrugged (which was rather difficult because Axel was pinning him by holding his shoulders against the wall).
"Don't fucking shrug, you asshole! You never gave him my letter! You wrecked our relationship! You ruined what we could have had!" Axel yelled. "You're a horrible friend, you know that? You ruin everything! You're selfish!"
Riku glared hatefully at the redhead. "Dude, fuck you!" He shoved Axel roughly away from him. "I don't know what the fuck you're talking about."
This enraged him even further and he shoved Riku back. "The letter, you dick! The fucking letter I gave to you so you could give it to Roxas! Maybe if you hadn't been so preoccupied trying to get him to sleep with you, you would've been able to give him my letter!"
Riku opened his mouth to respond, but Sora immediately piped up.
"Stop!" the brunet yelled. "It's not his fault!"
Axel and Riku both looked at Sora. Roxas, who still stood by the doorway, caught the look of guilt that passed his twin's features.
"Riku gave the letter to me," he mumbled. "And I was supposed to give it to Roxas."
"When?" Roxas asked. "When did that happen?"
Riku stepped away from Axel. His mind, now working a little better, recalled the letter Axel was talking about. He glanced at Roxas. "Your mom's funeral. After I tried talking to you, I went to my house and then I went to the funeral and gave Sora the letter. I didn't… I didn't go back to your house and give it to you because you made it pretty damn clear it wasn't me you wanted."
Sora caught the slight bitterness in Riku's voice and it hurt him. He looked over at Roxas and then immediately away again when he saw how pained his twin looked.
"I'm sorry," the brunet mumbled.
"Why didn't you give it to him?"
The question came from Axel, not Roxas, and Sora blushed a deep shade of red. Riku gave the redhead a hateful look, but the brunet walked toward his boyfriend and placed a hand on his arm in a soothing manner. He knew he had been wrong. What he hadn't known was what the consequences would be by not giving Roxas the letter.
"Because I was angry," Sora answered. "I read the letter and it just wasn't fair that Roxas got Riku and you."
Riku took the brunet's hand into his own and intertwined their fingers. Roxas stood by the doorway and he glanced at Axel who was torn between glaring hatefully at Riku and feeling compassion for the small brunet. He ran a hand through his red locks of hair and shifted on his feet uncomfortably.
"Where is it?" Roxas asked quietly. "The letter… Where is it?"
"Aesop's Fables," Axel answered to the surprise of everyone in the room. "It's in the anthology that used to belong to your mom. I found it a while ago and it had your name on it so I didn't read it. I didn't want to invade your privacy."
Sora looked at his twin. "I'm really sorry, Roxas. I was just... I was still really angry. And I'm… I'm sorry, Axel. I didn't mean to wreck things between you two. I didn't…" He shrugged his shoulders a little helplessly. "I was jealous and angry and I'm so sorry."
Riku ran his hand along the brunet's back and pressed a kiss to his forehead. He wrapped an arm around his boyfriend and pulled him close. Axel ignored the lonely feeling that suddenly arose in his chest. He and Roxas exchanged a look, but as soon as their eyes met, they looked away. Without another word, Axel walked across the room and out the door. He crossed the living room and then he descended the steps to the first floor of the duplex.
And Roxas, as usual, was following closely behind him like a lost animal.
"Where are you going?" the blond asked.
Axel walked into Sora and Roxas' bedroom and turned the light on. He retrieved his shirt from the floor and pulled it over his head. No answer came to the question that still lingered in the air. Roxas stood, looking quite forlorn, near the edge of the bed. He watched Axel with a mixture of resentment and worry.
"Axel," he tried. "You can't leave right now."
Thunder followed the small boy's words as if hoping to convince the redhead that Roxas was right.
"I don't want to be here," he muttered. He had just nearly assaulted his best friend for a crime he hadn't ever committed. He knew he looked like a psycho. He knew he looked like a crazy asshole trying to stir up trouble. Axel hated to think it, but he had a feeling the duplex was much quieter and a lot more peaceful when he wasn't around.
"I want you here." Roxas reached out and grabbed the redhead's hand.
"I'm sorry you never got the letter. I never abandoned you. I know I should've told you in person, but I just…" He shrugged. "It doesn't matter now."
"I think it matters," he mumbled. "I still want the letter, you know."
Axel shrugged again. He didn't really feel like explaining that the anthology of fables was at Demyx's house. He really didn't feel like telling Roxas that he had taken residence at Demyx's home and that he and the peppy blond were still dating each other. He ran a hand through his hair anxiously and breathed a sigh through his nose.
"I need to go."
Roxas caught his lower lip between his teeth. He dropped Axel's hand and realized it was useless to argue because the redhead had already made up his mind. He crossed his arms over his chest and let his gaze fall to his feet. It didn't matter that it was raining or that it was dark or that it was cold outside or that maybe Roxas was a little lonely. It didn't matter because Axel was spooked.
He wanted to run.
"Will you ever come back?" Roxas asked.
He picked his back pack up from the floor and shrugged. "Eventually, but… But there's still so much shit going on. Everyone has major issues."
The blond was a little amused by this statement. "You don't?"
Axel smiled in a weatherworn manner. "Roxy, I didn't have issues until I moved in with you."
Roxas was offended, but he knew it was true.
He was nothing but trouble.
••••••••••••••
"I see Axel has decided to grace us with his presence today."
A few giggles could be heard as the tall redhead meandered his way into the art room. Seeing Roxas had revitalized him somewhat and though they had ended on a rather strange note, Axel felt somewhat better. It was Tuesday afternoon and though he had gotten up quite early this morning, he felt very awake. He walked over to where Naminé sat and she looked at him apologetically when the two seats beside her were taken.
Axel shrugged. "Move," he said to a rather meek looking boy. "I'm sitting here now."
He gathered his things and immediately scuttled away. Naminé was torn between scolding him and laughing and in the end, she decided to just shake her head and give him a little smile. Axel sat down next to her and unloaded his art supplies from his bag. The art teacher, who had waited for the redhead to sit before continuing to lecture, began to pace the room and describe various techniques they would be attempting today.
"You shaved," Naminé said.
"So did you," Axel teased. She playfully hit him in the arm and he smiled at her.
"Why are you so happy?"
The redhead shrugged his shoulders a little and began to sketch something in his notebook. "Oh, you know… I saw Roxas yesterday."
Her eyes lit up. "How did it go?" she asked eagerly.
"Terrible," Axel answered honestly.
Naminé stared. "Then… Then why are you –"
"Because he's so lovely, Nam. And he wanted to kiss me and hug me and be on me and it was really great."
"Then… Then why was it terrible?" Her brow furrowed in confusion.
"Oh. Because then we talked about his mom and then I found out RIku never gave Roxas this letter I wrote to him years ago so I went upstairs to kick Riku's ass, but it was like four in the morning and then I found out Riku gave the letter to Sora and Sora –"
"Gave the letter to Kairi who hid it in Aesop's Fables," she finished for him.
Axel stared at her. "What? He gave it to Kairi? Kairi hid the letter?"
Naminé blushed. "Oh, I… Well, I… She was acting under Sora's orders and I… I'm sure she didn't –"
The redhead stopped listening. He didn't know whether to be upset or not. Granted, it was Sora's idea to hide the letter so it was his fault, but was Kairi really any better for helping him hide it? He shifted in his seat and Naminé frowned.
"Sorry. I didn't… I thought Sora told you… I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault, Nam," Axel stated. "I just think it's pretty shitty Kairi and Sora wanted to hurt Roxas like that. I know she was only doing what Sora said, but it wasn't like she had to. She's not exactly innocent."
Naminé gave the redhead a look. "Roxas was acting on my mom's orders and you've been pretty set that everything is all Riku's fault." She pointed out.
Axel blushed and looked away to hide it. "That's different."
She shrugged her shoulders and began to draw something on a simple sheet of paper. The professor had stopped talking and students were now moving about the art room, collecting art pieces or supplies for what they were doing in class. Axel shifted uncomfortably in his seat and ignored the double standard he had.
"I've blamed Roxas," he said defensively. "I know it's not all Riku's fault…"
Naminé nodded slowly. "But… You're able to be around Roxas without being angry. Meanwhile you won't even look at Riku."
Axel's blush deepened. "It's different. I love Roxas. Riku –"
"Has been your best friend for four years?" she asked innocently. "I'm not saying Roxas is guiltier than Riku, but you need to realize that Roxas did go after Sora's boyfriend. Riku liked Roxas at first, but Roxas was the one who initiated everything with him once he and Sora were dating."
Axel didn't say anything. He drew a small shape on the corner edge of his paper. He didn't want to hear this. Or talk about this. Or deal with his right now. He hated how right she was. He hated knowing that he wasn't dealing with this situation logically.
"You can't forgive Roxas so easily if you're going to hate Riku forever," Naminé said thoughtfully. "Whether you want to believe it or not, Riku and Roxas aren't so different. They're both composed of equal amounts of good and bad. I know you love Roxas, but don't let your love for him cloud your judgment. I love my brother dearly, but I love you too, Axel, and I don't want you to be another person who lets Roxas get away with murder. I also don't want you to lose your best friend."
The redhead smiled and he placed a hand on Naminé's back. "You're a good friend, Nami. I love you too and eventually I'd like to marry into your family."
She smiled at him. "Don't worry. If it doesn't work out with Roxas, Kairi will always be available."
Axel cringed. "I don't want to marry into your family that badly."
She laughed and shook her head. Axel knew she was right about Roxas and he knew she was right about Riku. It wasn't fair to forgive Roxas so easily, but to still hate Riku. It wasn't fair to punish Riku when Roxas was always getting away with things. It wasn't exactly Axel's job to punish Roxas, but he sort of felt there needed to be a line somewhere in the sand. Because if they did work out and Axel did become part of the Badcock family, Roxas needed a boundary line.
He needed to be tamed.
"Axel?"
The redhead turned in his chair and was a little surprised when the professor brought over a piece of canvas to him.
"Is this yours?" she asked.
Axel nodded. "Sorry. It's not finished."
A little smile curved her lips upward and she handed him the art piece. "Finish it. I think it would look quite lovely in the new wing of the Hollings Arts building."
Naminé glanced at the canvas Axel held in his hand and when the professor walked away, she leaned over and eyed the charcoal drawing. "I can't believe you haven't given yourself a head yet. That phantom-man is still holding Roxas."
The redhead half-nodded. "Should it be my head?" he asked curiously.
She couldn't answer.
A little sigh left Axel's lips and he placed the piece of canvas on the available tabletop next to his book bag. On the piece of paper in front of him, he began to write something down in red ink.
As with all good tales, the hero's adventure is always fraught with numerous trials and tribulations. The redhead's tale is no different. While he tries to publish his book so the blond boy will marry him, he faces various issues with the people in his life. The Harassment Officer, the Childish Musician, the Icy Schemer, the Voice of Reason, the Identical Gurus of Love, and the Secretive Best Friend are all players in the redhead's adventure to win blond boy's fragile heart.
I met Demyx by accident when Roxas decided it would be a good idea to invite a very delectable blond into a house where the sexual tension was palpable to the point of being able to pass STDs via the airway. This wasn't a tiny bit of sexual tension. This was sexual tension that had been built up over four years between four people. It was like gas in a building; a little bit of spark was all the duplex needed to erupt.
Demyx was that spark.
A/N: Okay, for those of you who are of a questioning mind…
I'm awful when it comes to law, but Riku's dad being in jail for DWI, as far as I have researched, seems to be okay. I based it off the law for DWI in New York. If you get like… three strikes in five years, you can go to jail for up to seven years with fines and whatnot.
Second, the charcoal drawing I'm referring to happened way, way back in chapter four (at the very end of the chapter).
All right, so… Here's chapter 11. I hope you guys enjoyed it. It's about 9,600 words and it was sort of fluffy. There's a reason Sora is encouraging Riku to meet up with his dad just like there's a reason Axel is writing-writing and not just writing fables. I definitely see this story being over in the next two to three chapters (four or five more chapters might be pushing it, but hey – you never know). I'll try and get the next chapter out ASAP. I know waiting is purgatory.
Thanks for all the support and all the patience. You guys are awesome. As always, thank you to Aindel S. Druida for beta-editing. Check out her profile, read her stories, and have her beta for you! She's very sweet, very kind, and very good at offering her opinion / advice on stories. She always says hilarious shit.
Thanks everyone!
Thank You for Reviewing:
IchiakiI: I really do enjoy shedding light on things. It makes writing the chapters a lot easier. As for the boy in my linguistics class – I'm wildly attracted to him. I'm not sure why. It isn't like he's the best looking dude and he usually just pisses me off. But I'm super into him.
I'm glad you liked the last chapter so much. I was having a hard, hard, hard time writing it and even though I've written this chapter, I'm still not satisfied with the last one.
Miyuki-ice-fox: Happy really, really, really late birthday!
I wish I had brought Cloud and Leon in earlier, but I think there would have been too much going on. I also wasn't sure how their side-story would fit into the main plot. But there they are, related to Axel and Zexion and trying to protect their family members from harm. Like good cousins do. :P
Any review is greatly appreciated regardless of what it says. I'm much more partial to nice reviews, but hey – who isn't?
Moooo: Woohoo!
Seromi: More word-fest than angst-fest. Though I didn't know the combination of angst and words was powerful enough to shoot someone to oblivion and then to hell. That's some mighty impressive stuff.
Vithian: Yes, still alive! Updates are just late and slow because my life is crammed pack with stuff I don't feel like doing (school, work, work, work, school, sleep, etc.). I don't quite understand why 'jail' is spelled 'gaol' either. Maybe it makes sense linguistically? I don't know enough to say for sure.
Jumper in American-English is a type of dress young girls wear. It's like a dress they can play in. I first heard the word in Catholic school when I was in fourth grade. All the girls wore jumpers and all the boys wore shorts and shirts.
I want this to end soon, but I noticed how I keep saying "it'll be over in two or three chapters" and I've been saying that since like… chapter nine, maybe? x_x;
Foxzees: Yep. I actually have that part of the plot all nice and worked out. That's been the same since the beginning. No permanent fall-out, I promise! That wouldn't make for such a happy ending.
Neitzarr: I find most people either understand language and have trouble with numbers or they understand numbers and have trouble with language. Or I'm just shit at explaining things.
I have to be really into my own story to write the emotions well. It's also how I gauge how into an idea I'll be. If I write something, but I'm not so into it, it comes out very bland and I scrap the idea. I think that's why I rewrite my chapters so much. I think the amount of emotion in the story is what pulls people in and keeps them coming back. I know if I feel really strongly about something, I keep coming back to it (even if I hate it!).
Ahh… Guilty Conscience. I'm also behind on that story too! Sorry to make you wait so long for both!
Animaluvr4life: I really like writing Cloud and Leon and I'm a little upset that I waited so long to add them in to the mix. As for Roxas, I like giving him a sense of humor because I think it breaks up his little moments of absolute desolation and angst. I also think showing he can be humorous when it comes to Riku and Sora sort of shows that he's slowly getting over what happened between the three of them.
Haaaaate naïve twit Sora. It drives me insane to see him that way. A little clumsy, maybe gullible, and maybe not so smart when it comes to school, but I don't understand the whole "totally innocent, borderline retarded" Sora people insist on writing. I see him more as the voice of reason. He balances other characters out because he doesn't let his own issues get in the way of helping others. He's also really selfless and most stupid people just… aren't. At all.
Thanks! These chapters do take forever to write and I'm glad my hard work shows!
Alstarryn: Cute = good. It sounds rather patronizing, but I promise it's not. I label something as 'cute' if I go 'aww' and then feel super extra gay afterward. Love the past-present-future Alstarryns. Past-FK is still freaking out about how late this chapter was. Present-FK is trying to now work on GC. Future-FK is waiting for summertime when writing will fully take over his life.
I do have a lot planned out for the end of this story and I'm definitely looking forward to it. When summer comes along, I might end up posting one or two one-shots that tie in with this story (one being about Leon and Cloud and then maybe one that shows where Roxas, Axel, Sora, and Riku ended up? I'm still playing with the idea). I'm sure a new Roxas x Axel story will come along soon (actually, I know one will because I already have two ideas that I've been working on for months), but it'll definitely be after this story is over with.
No depression! I promise this story still has a good bit left and I love Axel and Roxas so much that I don't think I could stop writing them if I tried. I hope you had a nice Valentine's Day too. I went to the ENT for Valentine's Day. It was magical.
Fredrikness: I'm so torn with Riku! When he fights with Axel, I want to hate him, but when he's all lovey with Sora, I want to like him. I also find it near impossible to dislike Axel even though he's also a douche sometimes.
Thanks. I really want the readers to feel what the characters feel. When I write, I try and match the characters to people I know in real life. When I find a good match, I'm better able to write. I know this guy who reminds me heavily of Axel (tough exterior, fragile interior) and when I write Axel, I think of how this guy would react in that particular situation. This doesn't always work and sometimes I tweak behavior, but hey – not all systems are perfect.
Read lots of books. Watch lots of sitcoms. I actually didn't find my writing style until after I read a shitload of Chuck Palahniuk books. I think finding your style is the most important part of writing. Once you have a style, you can work on perfecting it.
LenalovesAster: Roxas thinks about as much as any other 14-15 year old boy does. Not saying that's a good excuse or anything, but I think people forget that both Roxas and Riku were young (even I forget that) so I think they judge the characters a lot more harshly.
I think I will eventually post that Leon x Cloud one-shot because it would be tons of fun to write. When I wrote the L x C scene in the story, I always envisioned Cloud being the uhh.. "man" in the relationship. Then I did some detective work and found that most people prefer Leon as the "man." But then I was too lazy to change it so… nertz to them I say. .. Nertz? Is that what the kids say these days?
Ergh! Then you'll probably find Zexion even MORE insufferable in Guilty Conscience!
RainbowNinjaD: It's all part of the plot. I like writing the fables, but it was nice to be able to write something different.
Sana-chan9: Well, you know… an eye for an eye, huh? It's okay. Sometimes I forgot I'm the author too. I respond to these reviews and I realize that I feel how the readers do (or vice versa) and then I feel like I'm just reading along too. Sometimes I know about as much as the readers because sometimes I get lazy and forget to work out the plot (hi plot-holes, how are you today?).
I love little Easter-egg lines like that. I love drawing the characters back to their origins because I always write alternate universe stories (mostly because I'm incredibly lazy and can't be bothered to play any of the KH games that are on DS / PSP).
Miggery: Yea! That story is awesome! I still haven't reviewed the latest chapter either because I've been supremely busy. I only got to read the story because I left a tab open to it and whenever I had three minutes free, I would read a little bit.
Douchebaggery is okay. I feel like it's more realistic because there ARE douchebags out there, especially douchebag cops.
Yea… Unfortunately, I don't think the Zemyx coupling is very popular. Which is why you should make a contribution! The more Zemyx stories, the better.
Kit-KatSoraTwix193: I still hate long chapters when it comes to reading them. Writing them is no problem, but reading them makes me want to poke my eyes out. I guess I just hate the extraneous information that most stories tend to carry. I try and limit that as much as possible, but sometimes it's difficult to write something so long and make every word or every line meaningful.
Gah! This chapter was so late! Blame it on school and work. I wish I was paid to write because then my work would be my hobby. On the other hand, I'd feel bad making people pay for my writing.
The Moon's Berserk: True. I think most kids who were unloved by their parents try to seek approval in other ways (like breaking up your sibling's relationship). Or they're massive attention seekers (not always, but sometimes).
They're sort of using each other (not sure if that's really any better). But eventually it'll all come out and truth will prevail as it always does. And yes. Very true. You do not use someone else's toothbrush. Ever. For anything. Unless they're some sort of asshole who has made your life hell. Then maybe it's acceptable to rub the head of their toothbrush all over the inside of the community toilet bowl.
Allers3: Agreed. Roxas' mom was a definite catalyst in the whole entire process. Though I have a feeling that Roxas and Sora would always be at ends anyway because Riku did like Roxas first and then he went after Sora. Even if their mom wasn't there, I think Roxas would have always been supremely jealous of Sora. But, then again, Roxas would have gone after Axel in the beginning instead of messing around with Riku if the mom had never intervened.
No worries about spelling (I don't think there were errors). This story would be filled with errors if it weren't for my beta. And yes – huge chunks of straight dialogue are just… awful.
Stardust Roses: Damn! That's a lot of words for just two days of reading! I can barely finish a page and a half of a real book in two days (LAZY, LAZY, LAZY) and it takes me FOREVER to reread this shit before I send it over to my beta. You're a trooper.
Yea, she's pretty fucked up and Axel has a bit of a dirty vocabulary (but… that's because I swear a lot. I love slang). I think a lot of kids swear these days, especially boys.
Reku14: But the ending will be happy! And there will also be another Roxas x Axel story soon. Once this story is over, I'll definitely be posting another (I already have two ideas I'm pretty excited about). It will be sort of sad to be done with this story, but also a relief. I've actually never completed a chapter story before (this will be my first) and I must say, it's been a TON of work.
Axel and Roxas will be loved, I promise. I can't leave the story on a bad note. One-shots, sure - I can make those outrageously sad and heartbreaking, but I feel like a sad ending to a story this long is kind of a slap in the face to the readers.
Mute: I love this review. It's so dramatic and just absolutely wonderful. It's a review like this that makes me feel like the biggest tool on the planet for not updating on time.
My sister is the same way as you – she only reads things that are completed (and it's Harry Potter fanfiction for her, not Kingdom Hearts). But unlike her, you decided to give my story a go which makes me very happy. I know waiting for the next chapter is absolute torture and I don't blame people who wait for this story to finish before reading it.
I like giving everyone two sides because everyone is composed of good and bad. Some people are worse than others and some people are better, but no one is wholly innocent. Even Naminé betrayed Sora because she knew about Roxas and Riku and said nothing. I like giving each character depth because it creates a debate amongst the readers. Was it REALLY all Roxas' fault for what he did? Or could most of the blame be put on his mom? And should Riku, who was young and lacked parental guidance, really be so disliked? I like stories that force the reader to create their own opinion and make observations. Sometimes I spoon feed certain ideas (because this is fanfiction, not English class), but I absolutely love it when readers pick up on an idea I was subtly trying to point out.
Roxas is also my favorite. Because he is my favorite, I like to torture him ruthlessly (abuse is love). Roxas playing guitar was originally going to be played out in a different way, but I think now it's just something that's just there. I would like to show more of the Quadruplet's past together, but I think if I do, it'll be in a separate one-shot that goes along with this story. And it will definitely be after this story finishes. But I would really like to give people a deeper view of their relationships with each other.
Axel's brother is going to make an appearance. And you're right – Reno isn't his brother. I played with the idea that he would be, but then I decided against it because Axel is adopted and I don't know how much sense that would make (about as much sense as Roxas and Sora not being related). I also don't know Reno's personality very well (PFT like it's any different from Axel?) and I'd hate to write him all OOC and poop-like. But I do know who WILL be Axel's brother and it'll be fun to bring him in. As far as Axel's last name goes, I have yet to disclose it. It's a secret!
This review truly is darling. I appreciate everything you had to say and I'm enthralled that you're so in love with this story. I'm sorry I've let your soul suffer by putting this out late. I'm hoping the next chapter will be out fairly soon and you'll be ready to devour every word and leave another wonderful review.
Ffftw: Do authors eventually become rich? I know everyone here would buy fables written by Axel, but that might be more because of his reputation and less because of how good an actual writer he is. I never figured wealth would have much to do with this story, but I also think authors don't make money. So… In conclusion: I'm retarded.
t.y.u.i.t.y.u.i.: Wait, haven't we had this talk before? Not that I mind you still being a fan. I can dig it.
NekoNamii99: Um… Plot hole? That's totally my bad. I had this planned out differently in my head than what was actually written. I mean, I can sort of reason it by saying that the time Axel and Roxas actually spent together in high school was like… less than six months and that Roxas did ignore Axel after he moved (that's four whole years of not speaking to someone).
But, it doesn't matter because regardless of what I say, it's still just evidence of my lack of foresight and inability to plan. On the upside, I'm glad you like it.
Dearlybelovedangel: I kind of like Sora's self-sacrificing behavior. I like that even though he was the one who got screwed, he still tries to help Riku and Roxas and Axel sort out all their issues. I just don't see Sora being the kind of person to dwell on how bad things were. I see Riku and Roxas as dwellers, but not Sora. I think he's more of a "shit happens, so let's move on" kind of guy and I think he knows that in order to move on, he has to get everyone to move on too.
Roxas will come around. He's starting to come around now and eventually he and Axel will be together.
Phaenilix: They are all douchebaggy, aren't they? But flowers and rainbows make me want to vomit. I don't mind honeymooning, but I think the honeymooning should take place after all the angst and drama of attempting to be together. That way, there's something to look forward to once the dust and rubble clears.
If it's not a one-shot, suicide doesn't normally happen. I try to deal with difficult situations in a comical manner so it's easier to swallow (if we don't laugh, we'll cry). I also hate writing ultra-sad, always depressed characters. I don't mind writing angst, but too much angst and it becomes a wrist-slicing fest amongst the readers. I like using Axel to balance out the drama. His good natured humor makes him ideal for uncomfortable situations.
Backbones are fantastic. I think part of the reason Roxas likes Axel so much is Axel tells him no whereas no one else ever does. Riku did, but Roxas wore him down. With Axel, though, it's different. He does things on his own time and I think it both intrigues and infuriates Roxas.
Seven degrees of separation! Except in this case, it's more like one two or three degrees of separation. I love how someone is related to someone else and they all just happen to be in the same town. :D Hooray for semi-unrealistic connections!
FoxLover440: Thirteen and reading this? I'd say that's fine, but just don't read my one-shots because I don't want to be liable for corrupting a young and innocent mind. :P
It would make a pretty funny movie. Or at least a funny youtube video. You might be the only person who thinks Riku is a kicked puppy. I think most other readers are sort of torn on whether or not to like him. I think the more he and Axel fight, the less people like Riku (but only because everyone likes Axel so much). I'm pretty excited to finally get to the point where Roxas and Axel get together. It's gonna be awesome.
Lady Lake97: Yea, that's brief look at her. I'm sure a full explanation will come out in due time. She was written to be hated though, so hate away.
VoglioMalus: I don't abandon stories and I try to update as frequently as possible. I know how it feels to follow a story and then find out it's been deleted or the author stopped updating or something like that. Unless I've died, there will always be an update or something on my profile explaining why I'm not updating. And yes – I do enjoy my Roxas as an emotional train wreck. I'm not sure why.
SevenElevenOtaku: If I did decide to publish something like this, I would need to change a lot. The name change would be a definite (copyright infringement? No thanks!) and I would probably swap the genders of Roxas and Sora. Not because I'm against homosexuality (obviously), but I know the story would sell better if they're all nice and heterosexual. I'm not sure how many fables Axel will write or how many he has written. My guess is a good bunch since it's been like… eight months since he began writing? Eventually I'll figure it out.
M-is-4-melissa: I love how you described me as a certified word ninja. I actually had to share that with my roommate and his response was to stare at me as if I'd gone insane. In short: he's a poop nose and he can go sit on a dick. But I'm really glad you like this so much. I didn't know Bieber got a haircut (I guess I lack "Bieber Fever"), but that doesn't matter because I'm pretty much a certified word ninja. And I'm going to start referring to myself that way in my head. Because it makes me feel cool.
TopHatGlow: It's okay. It's been taking me forever to update. However, I'll attribute this error to ffnet and their inability to hire an I.T. group that's worth a damn. I'm not sure if I'll post Axel's fables at the end of the story. I've always had the ending for this worked out in my head and... Well, you'll see soon enough. I'm glad my story combined with you is the formula for world peace. That's pretty awesome.
Girly-girl12345: I didn't want to type your penname at first because it had a lot of numbers at the end. Then I realized the numbers were 1-5 and I manned-up. And hooray! I am continuing and I am updating! I hate how long this has taken!
Avianice: I tend to ruin people for sex, too. ;D I really enjoy giving each character depth and I really like being able to convey their emotions so well. I hate one-dimensional bullshit that seems to float all around. I'm not saying a lack of depth makes a story bad, but I think giving everyone a distinct personality definitely helps the story chug along. I'm thrilled you like this so much though I am sorry that I ruined you.
EpicSonic: It might be the crappiness that is ffnet and NOT your PC. But I'm glad you found this and I'm shocked you read it all in one day! I feel like this story should come with a waiver form. I don't want to be responsible for bleeding retinas.