A/N... I think you guys are going to be surprised at the reaction our couple has to this pregnancy. Most of you guessed right on Edward's reaction, but wrong on Bella's. And this chapter kind of ran away on its own. I hadn't originally planned it to go this way, but sometimes, the characters write themselves.
That being said, this is an emotional chapter – and I don't feel in a bad way. And it comes with a LEMON WARNING. :)
Okay...on with it...
CHAPTER 16
BELLA
"Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Cullen. You're pregnant."
That sentence hung in the silent and now suddenly stifling air for a few seconds as Dr. Powell smiled at us, but my head spun to Edward. I could see shock and relief, but mostly, I saw happiness and pride practically radiating off of him. I did a mental recount of the past few weeks and realized that I had probably discarded my pills about the time that Bethy had been taken. It was grief and terror and anger that had caused my forgetfulness.
I turned back to the doctor with narrowed eyes. "You're sure?" I breathed, not knowing whether I was scared or fucking ecstatic.
"Yes, though you looked surprised," he chuckled. "We'll have to do a sonogram in order to see how far along you are. We could do that now, or—"
"Yes!" Edward and I both urged at him – rather loudly, I might add – and I smiled apologetically at the poor doc.
"Fine," he laughed softly. "Let me set that up. You might want to get back in bed, Mrs. Cullen."
He left us, and suddenly, I was lifted and set gently back into my hospital bed. A looming Edward pressed his forehead to mine, kissing my lips softly.
"Scared?" he whispered.
"Terrified," I countered, but locked my eyes with his.
The green was almost gone, leaving me staring into a heated, dark, loving gaze as his hand pressed lightly to my stomach, his fingers spread wide so that he could touch as much of me as possible. It was the same thing he'd done the minute I'd told him I was pregnant with Bethy. My body reacted instantly to his touch, his kisses, and suddenly, it all made sense – my mood swings, my fatigue, and my need to be touching him at all times. My hormones were in high gear.
"It seems I can't be trusted with birth control," I joked, but tears welled up in my eyes. "Christ, Edward, this is awful timing..."
Edward smiled warmly, reaching up to gently brush my tears away with his fingers. "So was Bethy," he countered, tilting his head at me as he sat on the edge of the bed. "That seemed to work out..."
I nodded and sniffled, smiling a little. "I know, baby. I just..."
"Wasn't expecting this?" he chuckled, brushing my hair from my face.
"No, not at all, but..." I sighed, unable to hide my smile. "But I'm so okay with it," I finished in a whisper, because looking up at Edward's happy face just did things to me. I'd seen the same visions the very second I knew I was pregnant with Bethy as I did now – a cherub faced, green eyed, squirming baby with crazy hair. "Are you?"
"You're kidding, right?" he scoffed, rolling his eyes at me. "I'm more than okay, sweetness. And we'll work it out. We always do."
I nodded, but looked up when the doc came in, followed by a nurse rolling a machine in front of her. I took a deep breath and let it out as Edward got up from the bed to sit in the chair, his hand never letting go of mine.
It was dèja vu. There was no other way to describe it. Edward had been there every step of the way with Bethy, and I could see now that this little one would be the same way as the doctor started to squirt the jelly onto my stomach.
It took a few minutes of probing and rubbing, but Dr. Powell's face lit up. "There we are," he snickered. "It's a bean."
Edward and I chuckled, but our eyes were locked onto the screen as the nurse giggled at us. She printed the picture for us, and the doctor shut off the monitor.
"I'd say three to four weeks along," he stated, pointing to the picture. "You should see your regular doctor soon, Mrs. Cullen. Okay?" he asked, and both of us nodded stupidly, our eyes unable to leave the picture in my hand. "Take it easy for a few days, but now, you're clear to go, so you can go ahead and get dressed."
"Thanks," Edward and I whispered, barely taking our eyes off the picture, but something occurred to me suddenly, and my giggles couldn't be stopped.
"Oh shit," I chuckled, cupping Edward's face. "Three to four weeks?" I asked with a raised eyebrow, and he nodded, clearly amused at my laughter. "That puts us in the tree house!"
"Oh damn," he growled, kissing me soundly. "Why is that so fucking perfect?" he gushed, his smile completely taking over his face. It was the All American, panty dropping, sexy ass, crooked smile, and it was fucking hot.
I grinned, because he was right. It was perfect. It was a complete circle of just...us. And our laughter could barely be contained as I sat up to get dressed.
I wiped a tear away and looked up at him. "I think...maybe we shouldn't say anything yet, baby," I suggested. "It's still so early..."
He nodded, helping me to my feet. He looked a little disappointed, but he understood. He sat back down in the chair to wait for me to get dressed, and when I was finished, he tugged me to stand between his legs. Leaning in, he lifted my shirt, placing the sweetest of kisses to my belly. My heart sputtered out of control when he looked up at me through his long, dark eyelashes.
"This changes everything, you know," he said, his voice low, like smooth silk or warm chocolate. "Nothing happens to you, Bella. I mean it."
I nodded, having come to the same conclusion myself the very second the doctor had told us the news.
"New rules, new precautions," he said, opening his mouth to the skin of my stomach. "I don't care if you have to sit next to Alice...no more risky shit, sweetness." I opened my mouth to speak, but he stopped me. "I know no one has my back like you do, baby, but it's not just...you now."
"I know," I admitted with another nod. "I know, Edward," I reiterated. "I'll hate it, but I understand it," I conceded, because it drove me crazy to just listen to him run whatever mission he was on. I needed to be there, so with all the shit still left up in the air with Walter and Lilith, the mere possibilities were enough to drive me insane.
"Interviewing people is fine, computer work is fine, but none of the shit that happened today, Bella. Please," he begged, wrapping his arms all the way around me.
I stifled a yawn, but nodded. "Okay, Edward," I told him, giving in, because he wasn't beyond locking me in a room to keep me safe, especially when it came to the safety of his family.
"Let's get you home, love," he murmured softly, standing up. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders to guide me out of the small room and chuckled once, looking down at me. "What will we tell Bethy when the time comes?"
"Oh, God," I groaned, shaking my head. "One thing at a time, please, baby. Though she's just commanding enough like you that she may enjoy bossing a little brother or sister around," I teased him.
His laugh was deep and sweet as he kissed the side of my head. "You might be right, sweetness. And maybe we should wait to spread the news," he chuckled as he led me down the hallway so that we could go home.
~oOo~
I woke up with a sharp inhale, sitting straight up in bed. I tried to look around my bedroom, but it was pitch black and the middle of the night, according to the clock on Edward's nightstand.
My dreams were horrifying, and with a shaky hand, I rubbed my face roughly.
"Bella?" Edward called, sitting up beside me, and I couldn't help but reach for him, because I'd been dreaming about him. "What's wrong, love?" he asked.
"Dream," I mumbled, letting him lay us back down face to face, but I tangled my legs with his, just to be able to feel as much of him as possible.
"It's okay now," he soothed, wiping the sweat from my brow with gentle sweeps of his fingers. "Do you want to talk about it?"
I shook my head, pulling his forehead to mine with one hand and his waist closer with the other. "No."
The feel of his skin against my legs and under my fingers felt so fucking good. The smell of him, like clean soap and fresh cut lumber, invaded my senses. I couldn't help but glide my hands through his hair and up and down his back. It was soothing, it was helping chase away the dream, and it was making me want him like never before. In fact, shamelessly, I gripped his shoulder and rolled my hips over his, moaning at the feel of him growing hard against me as I hitched my leg around his waist.
"Fuck, baby," he whispered, nipping at my lips. "What are you doing to me?"
"Edward," was all I could articulate, before my lips crashed into his.
The deep, erotic moan that he released into my mouth just spurred me on, causing me to almost assault his mouth with my lips, teeth, and tongue. Edward's hands gripped the t-shirt I was wearing, tugging me closer, and then rolling us so that I was on top of him, because he always caught up so very quickly.
"Christ, love," he panted, gliding his hands over my ass, up my sides, to grab my face. "I don't want to hurt that back, sweetness, but fuck... Tell me what you want."
I needed him so badly that the sound that escaped me almost sounded like a sob as I crashed back into him. I gripped him fiercely with my thighs straddling either side of his waist, my hips rolling over him again. He felt so fucking perfect underneath me, hitting me exactly where I needed him.
He sat up with me on his lap, and when I started to protest, he broke away from my mouth. "Shh, baby," he crooned, slipping his hands inside my t-shirt so that he could gather it up, his fingers grazing teasingly up every inch of my body as he did so. He swiftly tugged it over my head and dropped it next to us, leaving me in just a pair of underwear. "I'm not stopping you...just slowing you down. I really don't want to fucking hurt you."
I whimpered, nodding that I'd heard him, and wrapped my arms around his neck as his landed on my ass, dipping under the waistband of my panties.
"Fuck, I just need you," I was finally able to whisper, nipping at his lips.
"And you have me," he countered.
That statement, combined with the dream I'd just come out of, made me shiver in his arms and grip him tighter, tears truly welling up in my eyes, and I gasped at how much I'd needed to hear those four simple words from him.
Edward pulled his face away from mine, reaching over to turn on the side lamp with one hand, while the other never ceased sensual caresses, gentle squeezes, and light tugs up and down my side. He clicked it on to the lowest setting, and then turned back to me, his face filled with concern, but the lust, the love was still there, all highlighted in the dim glow of the lamp.
"Don't stop, don't stop," I pleaded, shaking my head.
Rough, strong hands gently grasped either side of my face to stop my protests. Wiping away my tears, he tilted his head at me. Calm, warm, green eyes studied me intently as he held me still.
"Your dream was about me?" he asked, nipping at my lips, but not quite giving in, and I nodded, more tears escaping. "Was it the one where you couldn't get to me? Or the one where I was just...gone?" With every other word of each question, he dropped a kiss on my heated skin – on my cheek, my jaw, below my ear, and finally, a long, slow, open mouthed kiss on my throat.
"Edward," I whispered as I gripped his shoulders like a lifeline, shaking my head profusely, because the word "gone" didn't come close to the dream, and I didn't want to voice it out loud. The mere idea terrified me.
Firm fingers threaded into my hair, and he forced me to look at him. "I'm right here, love," he stated, a little harsher than the voice he'd been using. "It's all okay. It was just a fucking dream."
Something about that voice knocked my panic down a notch or two, and I took a deep breath, locking eyes with his, silently begging him to help me, because I still needed him, wanted him, to the point I thought I'd burst into flames. Deep down, I knew it was now hormones driving this feeling, but combined with the nightmare, I wasn't able to stop myself. At all.
I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding in and nodded once, finally allowing myself to reach up with shaky hands and touch his gorgeous face. There was a slight touch of stubble growing in since his shave from the morning before, and feeling it under my fingertips for some reason relaxed me a bit more.
"I love you," I breathed, closing my eyes a bit.
"Uh uh," he chided softly with a dark chuckle. "Eyes open, sweetness. You need to see me...see what I'm going to do to you."
Mindful of the bruise on my upper back, he arched my body slowly, his eyes never leaving mine as he bent to kiss my sternum. He used teeth and lips to kiss his way to my breast, making sure I was still watching him when his tongue snaked out to swirl around my nipple. A deep, wanton moan escaped me, and I writhed in his arms, hissing when my back pinched a sharp pain.
"Slow. Down," he commanded, his eyes dark, fierce, but still very much heated.
Keeping my legs draped over his, he set me softly on the bed between them so that he could reach out and touch every inch of my upper body. Thumbs brushed over my nipples, bringing them to such tight peaks that it was almost painful. Long, knowing fingers with rough callouses tickled down each rib with an airy touch that almost made me giggle.
He was calming me, making sure I knew he was there, that he wasn't going anywhere. He was proving the difference between dreams and reality. When his fingers finally made purchase on the waistband of my underwear, he tugged them down swiftly, making sure my legs went right back over his. I was complete naked for him, spread open for him, and at his mercy.
Bending over me, his mouth placed a sweet, almost reverent kiss to my belly. This time, tears of happiness pricked the corners of my eyes as I slid my fingers into his hair to hold him there just a touch longer. He was reminding me of what we'd made, of how much that meant to him.
His hands rubbed up and down my thighs as he sat back up, giving my entire being a heated once over. He drank me in, dragging his tongue along his bottom lip slowly, until his fingers finally slipped lightly over my apex. My breath caught, my hips raising up to feel more, but he pressed me gently back down, spreading my legs wider.
"Mm-mm-mm," he crooned, shaking his head once. "That is a fucking beautiful sight," he purred, letting the fingers of one hand glide between my folds and cupping my breast with the other. "Oh...and she's so damn wet for me..."
I was wet – almost embarrassingly so. I was also throbbing, swollen, and aching for his touch. My breathing was shallow, my fingers gripped the sheets of our bed, and my legs pulled at him to bring him closer, for him to just do something.
The shaky sigh of almost relief when he slid one long finger inside of me echoed through our room. My eyes rolled back into my head as his thumb made a delicious circle over my clit, and when he added a second finger, curling them just right, a long, slow, "Yes," hissed from my mouth.
"Eyes on me when you come, baby," he commanded softly, but he was wearing a slightly smug smile as he worked in and out of me. I was so wet that it could be heard throughout the room every time he sank deeper and deeper into me.
My eyes shot up to his, but he wasn't looking at me; he was focused on what his fingers were doing. The sensual moan that rumbled from him – one of my most favorite sounds – caused me to clench down hard on his hand. His head shot up to lock gazes with me.
"Oh, sweetness, you're close," he sang low, his mouth quirking up into a half smile. "Come for me, baby. Let it all go. Feel only me when you come on my hand."
There were certain things about Edward I couldn't resist, and one was my body's reaction to him, to his voice. It owned me. I had no control over the orgasm that shot through me like a freight train, because he pressed my clit at just the right time, in just the right spot that caused stars to explode behind my eyelids.
"Holy shit," I whimpered, shattering and shaking as he continued to use his hand to ride out my spasms.
Suddenly, he was looming over me, bracing one arm by my head, but holding his body away from me. "Don't move, baby," he warned with a sexily raised eyebrow. "We're not done. Not a chance, love," he purred, leaning down to give me a long, slow, deep kiss at the same time he was working his boxers off. "I will take care of you."
He resumed his previous position – only now, he was gloriously naked, his cock standing strong and proud. Easing me closer to him, he slipped his tip just inside my entrance. With one perfect, delicious roll of his hips, he sank deep within me, both of us calling out.
With the position he was using, he was in control – of everything. Every thrust, every sweet touch of the sensitive spot deep inside of me, every thumb brushed across my nipples, every circle around my clit... He was in charge of it all.
How he knew what I needed, even when I didn't, always seemed to take me by surprise. He was protecting my back by controlling every move.
He lifted one of my legs, holding them open by the back of my knee so that he could hold me still and watch himself fuck me, but his mouth was his most deadly weapon...and most soothing one.
"Now can you feel me right here, baby?" he asked, but it wasn't a harsh tone; it was deep and smooth, almost like the strokes he was thrusting into me. "I'm here, love."
"Edward," I called, wanting to hold him, needing my hands on him, so I held them out.
He shook his head, a deadly smile creeping over his handsome face. "Not that way, Bella," he panted, and using every muscle, he lifted me back up into his lap.
"Fuck," I growled, gripping his shoulders – not from pain, but from the pure bliss that came with sinking farther down onto him. "Damn, you feel so good," I moaned, rolling my hips over him and bracing my elbows on his strong shoulders.
"Make yourself come, baby," he commanded, holding my ribcage with fingers spread wide. "Use me for what you need," he told me, dragging his teeth over my neck, only to suckle lightly on the skin just below my ear, causing my rhythm and breathing to falter.
I rolled my hips harder, grazing my clit over his pelvic bone, and we both gasped.
"Oh God, baby," he groaned, his forehead hitting my shoulder. "Please, please, come. I'm so fucking close... You feel too good, and I love you too much..."
That last admission, that last declaration was all I needed, and the coil inside me snapped, my climax completely taking over my body. Fingers wove into either side of my head, and Edward forced my gaze on him. His mouth hung slightly open, sweat beaded on his forehead, and his jaw clenched, just before he came hard deep inside of me.
Our sweaty foreheads bumped together, our breathing still heavy as we just stared at each other.
"Edward, I love you so much," I panted, wrapping my arms all the way around his head, my emotional roller coaster taking off on a different emotion altogether – overwhelming, couldn't breathe, head over heels love for the man in my arms, the father of my children. Children...as in more than one now, and my tears started anew. I almost sobbed at the thought of losing him, because we weren't even close to catching Lilith, and my dream was still fresh and bitter, just under the surface.
One deep, but oh so sweet chuckle escaped him as he wrapped his arms around my body. "Fuck, baby," he chuckled again, still breathing rather heavily. "Damn, I'd forgotten about these crazy hormones of yours..."
I giggled, but sniffled, too, tugging on his hair. "Don't laugh at me! I can't help it."
He pulled back, and watching him trying to sober up was almost fucking comical. But his eyes glowed warm and sweet, a deep green in the low light. "Oh, sweetness, I love you, too. I'm right here, and it'll be okay. I promise."
"My dream scared me," I admitted softly. "I can't lose you..."
"You won't," he assured me, reaching between us to place his hand on my belly. "I've got just as much to fight for, love. More than I ever thought possible. So if you don't think I'll be careful, that I won't avoid stupid, fucked up shit, then you don't know me."
His voice was sharp, but still loving, still soothing. He meant every word. And I knew that this pregnancy was different, because we were still so very deep in danger. With Bethy, it was just simple cases – lost relatives, simple security details, and a few missing persons – and I was able to work almost up until her delivery. This was so fucking different, because it was possible that we were all targets now.
"I know, Edward. It just scared me," I sighed, trying my damnedest not to cry again. Fucking hormones. I kissed him soundly on the mouth, pulling back to run my fingers through his hair.
"I know it did, baby," he soothed, running his nose up one side of mine and down the other. "Let it go. Shake it off, because it wasn't real. I'm right here." He paused, before continuing, "I want you to get some more sleep, Bella."
With that order, he laid us down, pulling me close once we were separated and I had tugged my t-shirt back on – a habit that came with having Bethy able to walk in. With soft, gentle sweeps of his fingers through my hair, it didn't take long for my eyelids to grow heavy and my breathing to deepen. Nuzzling farther into his neck, I let his scent, his touch, and his heartbeat to lull me back to sleep.
~oOo~
EDWARD
There was no more sleep for me. Once Bella was settled and sleeping much more peacefully, I slipped out of bed. I figured I could start the coffee, go for a run, and by the time I got back, I could work with Alice in the office or some shit.
I tugged on my shorts and laced up my sneakers, silently opening our door, but it was the little shadow down the hall that just about scared the shit out of me.
"Bethy," I sighed, practically placing a hand over my heart, but I knelt down when she ran to me, Mr. Bunny in tow.
"D-Daddy," she whimpered, clinging to me fiercely.
"It's too early, little sweetness. You should be asleep," I said softly, pulling back to tuck her hair behind her ears.
She yawned widely, nodding, but I could tell that my wife wasn't the only one having nightmares. "Not yet," she stated weakly.
I smiled at her, kissing her forehead, simply because she was just adorably stubborn – a character trait she'd earned honestly from both of her parents. I stood up with her in my arms, and she laid her head on my shoulder, her little fingers tracing the ink on my chest.
"I'll make a deal with you, baby," I crooned to her, dropping another kiss to her head. "You can stay up just long enough for me to make coffee, but then... How about I put you in our bed with Mommy?"
"Okay," she sighed, completely content in my arms, so I held her all the way to the kitchen, during the entire coffee making process, finally setting her on the edge of the counter. That whole time, her fingers seemed fascinated with my tattoo.
"What's it say?" she asked, watching her own fingers, and then looking up at me.
"USAF... United States Air Force. Poppy has one, too. So does Uncle Em," I told her, pointing to each letter.
"Poppy's is on his arm," she whispered, a little dip appearing between her eyebrows, and suddenly, she looked like Bella had the first time she saw my ink. "Why do you have it?"
I smiled, kissing her nose, but swallowed thickly. She didn't need to know the reason behind the stars, but the actual Air Force symbol was important. "At one time, all I wanted was to be like Poppy and join the Air Force, to fly. So when I was about to ship out overseas, I got this to match his. I was very...proud to be able to finally get it."
"Did it hurt?"
"A little," I chuckled.
"Were you scared?"
"More about going away than the needle of getting this," I told her, still chuckling, and I tapped my chest with a finger.
"Did you miss Mommy?" she asked, and suddenly, this was turning into twenty questions.
"I didn't know Mommy then," I explained. "I wish I had."
God, that was the fucking truth. Though, I'd never voiced it allowed, I didn't think. I wished many, many times after saving Bella from Miller's basement that I'd kept in contact with the amazing girl I'd met when we were just kids. I was pretty sure that my life would have been different, that I wouldn't have done things for so many years that shamed me. And the mere thought of having my Bella to take care of me when I'd gotten hurt and released from the service just made my loneliness back then all the sharper.
Something about that answer bothered her, because she frowned up at me, yawning at the same time. "Does that make you sad, Daddy?" she asked, tilting her head at me.
"No," I said with a smile. "I have you and Mommy now. That's what's important. You're my girls," I said, my heart practically soaring with the secret news we'd found out the day before.
Bethy giggled at that, and I scooped her up off of the counter.
"Can you do me a big favor?" I whispered conspiratorially at her as I carried her down the hall.
"What?" she whispered back, gripping Mr. Bunny.
"Mommy doesn't feel so good, baby. Can you snuggle with her? Make her feel better? Hmm? You're really good at it."
Bethy grinned and nodded, but I could see by her eyes that she was still sleepy. "Okay, Daddy."
I put a finger to my lips just before opening the door to the bedroom. The beauty of Bella asleep was breathtaking. It always had been to me. Waves of chocolate silk splashed across her pillow, her hand tucked under her chin, and an escaped from the covers, gorgeous, strong leg that always seemed to be searching for me – all of it was just stunning to me.
I tucked my other brunette into my side of the bed, pulling the covers up around her chin. I leaned over, kissing her forehead, and whispered, "I love you."
"Love you, too, Daddy," she said, yawning widely, her eyelids already falling heavily.
I leaned over her, pressing a light kiss to Bella's temple. "Only sweet dreams, girls."
~oOo~
I pushed my run hard. Maybe too hard. I was worried about Bella's and Bethy's nightmares, about what all this shit was doing to them, and the added stress of Bella's pregnancy just made it all the worse. I just wanted it fucking over. I wanted Walter and Lilith six feet under, and I still wasn't sure Kenny would live to see Christmas. Hell, probably not even Halloween, considering it was still the middle of the fucking summer.
By the time I got back through the woods, a few people were already arriving to continue their research. I could see my father's car, Emmett's, and even Jasper's truck, but Eleazar wasn't there yet.
"Step off the fucking creamer, Jazz!" Emmett boomed, making himself a cup of coffee under the tent that had been set up for the security team Eleazar had permanently placed at my home.
"Well, give up the sugar, asshole!" Jasper countered with a laugh, holding the jar of creamer back, and suddenly, it was a fucking condiment standoff.
I walked to the cooler, grabbing a bottle of water, and spun to the both of them. "Wake Bella, and I'll rip your arms off and beat you with them...both of you," I warned them with a raised eyebrow. "Shut the fuck up...or at least fucking tone it down."
"Oh, damn," Jasper sighed, looking sheepish as he stirred his coffee. "My bad, Ed. Sorry. How's she feeling?"
"Sore," I said after downing the entire bottle and reaching for another one. "She's got a helluva bruise on her back, and she's exhausted."
"Poor Bellsy," Emmett groaned, shaking his head. "What the fuck happened down there?"
"We'll go over it all when she's up, I'm sure," I said with a shrug. "To be honest, I don't know everything – just that Lilith got to her."
"But the tests came back okay, right?" Jasper verified, looking nervous, because we were all a very tight group of friends, and they considered Bella their family. "I mean, she's cool, right?"
I smiled at him, because he had no clue. "Yeah, she's cool. Nothing broken, no brain damage," I chuckled. "Just roughed up a bit. The tests were...perfect."
"Good," Emmett sighed with relief. "We'll keep it down, Ed. Sorry."
"Yeah, sorry, man," Jasper added, looking contrite. "But when Bethy gets up, Alice wants to see her. I think she upgraded her program or some shit. You know...since she can't go to Mrs. Cope's..."
I waved off the apologies and gave Jasper a nod, heading toward the house. I needed to check on my girls, grab a shower, and sit down with Alec when he arrived. After he'd found out that Bella was going to be okay, he'd taken off back to Preacher's to have a chat with Sharky. I wanted to know every fucking detail.
I walked in to hear my daughter chatting happily with her grandparents as they listened raptly to every word, even if it didn't make sense. She was eating a bowl of cereal as Esme tried to braid her hair.
"There she is," I said, kissing the top of Bethy's head.
"Hi, Daddy," she mumbled around a mouth full of Cheerios.
I chuckled, because she looked brighter, happier than she had a few hours prior. "Mommy still sleeping?"
"Uh huh," she said with a nod.
"Good," I sighed, pouring myself a cup of coffee. "She can sleep all day if she wants to."
My dad chuckled. "How is she?"
"Tired."
"And sore, I bet," Esme added, but there was something in her knowing glance up at me that caused me to smirk.
She knew. She would never say it in front of anyone, but she knew.
My coffee cup paused about halfway to my mouth when we locked gazes. There was such happiness and hope there, I knew I'd better confirm her suspicions soon, or she'd bust open at the seams. Esme had to be, by far, our biggest supporter and help since the fucking beginning. We owed her everything, in all actuality. She knew about Bethy way before anyone else, and she already was guessing about this one. It almost made me laugh.
I turned to my dad. "Would you please let me know when Alec gets here? I want to know how that talk with Sharky went."
"Sure, son," he said, turning his loving gaze on Bethy as she forced his shirt sleeve up, once again looking at the Air Force ink that we both had.
"Daddy's has stars," she pointed out, taking another bite of cereal. "You don't."
I wrinkled my nose at him. "She was studying mine earlier. I'm not sure she would understand what they mean."
But Esme put it in a way that put us all at ease. "Daddy has stars to honor some really brave men, sweet one. They are a sign of strength and sacrifice."
My heart clenched, because I'd never really looked at it that way. To me, they represented loss and mistakes. Though, once again, I supposed she knew that. Esme always had a way of making me see just a touch clearer on things that had always bothered me.
Bethy seemed to accept that explanation just fine, though she still may not have truly understood it. She stared at Poppy's ink, and then mine, finally looking up to my face. She looked so much like Bella, I could have just kissed her silly. Her little legs swung as she sat on the stool, her spoon blindly dipping back into the bowl.
"I like the stars. They're pretty. You should get some, Poppy," she commanded without a second glance at him, and he laughed, kissing her temple.
"If I did, baby girl, then they'd go all the way up my arm," he chuckled, shaking his head. "I've been around longer than your daddy."
She giggled, rolling her eyes in such a way that we all laughed with her. I shot her a wink, because the older she got, the more I could see her emerging. Her own little self just...becoming. Yes, she was a beautiful mix of her mother and me, but now, she was shedding that copying phase and was starting to become...Bethy. And that thought both scared me and sent me soaring, because I hoped she would always stay this sweet and smart and strong, but I also couldn't wait to see who she'd become.
"Finished, little sweetness?" I asked, and took the bowl from in front of her when she nodded. I set it in the sink and scooped her up, placing her on the counter and kissing her adorably puckered lips. "I think," I teased her, "that Aunt Alice has something for you."
She gasped, her eyes widening with excitement. "What?" she whispered, like if she spoke aloud, it wouldn't happen.
"I think," I started again with a chuckle, "that she's got a new game for you..."
"Yay!" she cheered, wriggling to get down.
"Wait," I laughed, holding her steady. "I love you. Do you know?"
"Yes, Daddy!" she sighed, rolling her eyes, like I was dumb for asking. "I love you, too."
"Good," I grunted dramatically, giving her neck a loud smooch. "Now," I whispered in her ear. "See if Poppy will take you to Aunt Alice."
"Poppy!" she sang, and he cracked the fuck up.
"Don't even start," he snorted, plucking her off the counter. "I'm a sucker for the puppy face. I'm not sure I could handle it this morning, baby girl. So just let's go," he growled, slinging her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, causing her to squeal into laughter and her face to turn red. I could hear her laugh all the way across the damn yard.
I turned my back on Esme, making myself another cup of coffee, but I knew she hadn't moved.
"How far along?" she asked softly.
"Three to four weeks," I said, chuckling when she gasped. "How'd you know?" I asked her, finally facing her again.
"Her fatigue, her emotions... Those tests yesterday seemed to take way too long, not to mention that I was going to check on you two and saw the sonogram machine being wheeled in," she stated softly, but tears of joy welled up in her eyes as her hands covered her mouth. "I wasn't sure if she was keeping up with her pills, but then, it wasn't my place to ask if you two were actually trying again."
"An error on the pill part," I chuckled, "but..."
"You don't care," she finished for me, and I nodded in agreement. "Oh, God, Edward... Such beautiful news during this time..."
I grinned, because I couldn't fucking help it. "We aren't saying anything yet. You know, like last time..."
"Of course, of course... It's early," she breathed, walking around the counter. She placed a kiss on my cheek. "Whatever you two need, you know I'll help you."
"Thank you, Esme." I looked down at my cup, knowing I could tell this woman anything. I took a deep breath and finally met her gaze. "I'm so fucking scared, though. This...this shit isn't over. I can't let anything happen to them. They're everything to me."
She reached up and brushed an errant curl from my forehead. "I know, son," she soothed. "We'll figure it out. She'll just have to be careful, that's all."
I nodded again, but looked over at her. "Bethy and Bella...they're... Well, they're having nightmares, Esme. I'm not sure if they can take much more of this."
She pursed her lips and took a deep breath. "It's natural for Bethy to have them. She's been through some really scary things. As long as she's safe and secure at home, they should ease up. Bella, on the other hand," she sighed, starting to pace. "I imagine she's terrified, Edward. She's not stupid. She knows that the physical part of this mission is now over for her, so she's got to sit back and watch you go alone. And I know her... She truly trusts no one when it comes to protecting you."
I wrinkled my nose, shaking my head, because fuck, if Esme hadn't hit the nail on the head with that one.
"Step back from the joy you're feeling, son," she continued. "If something happens to you, she would be alone with a young child and one on the way, both of whom would be reminders of the love you share. She would go on, for them, but I'm not sure she'd ever really live again, Edward. It would kill something inside of her if you didn't come home." She reached up and cupped my face. "You two have always taken such amazing care of each other. You've always just found your own way, and I've never seen anything like it, but you have to understand her fear. She's not just scared for herself; she's scared for Bethy, too – and that new little one. You're an amazing father, Edward, and she doesn't want her children to miss out on that. You have to be just as careful as she does. Understand?"
I swallowed nervously and nodded. My throat closed up, because I knew she was right. This had been my worst fear when I was a soldier for hire. Having a wife, a family, and leaving them behind on missions made shit so fucking dangerous, because mistakes could be made out of fear and self-preservation, simply to be able to get back home. Lives could be lost; people could get hurt.
Suddenly, the room was too stuffy, the air too thick. I needed to set eyes on my wife, because only she could make this shit go away.
"I need a shower," I whispered, looking out the kitchen window as Eleazar pulled in, followed by Benny and Wes.
Esme's eyes were warm and filled with understanding as she nodded at me. "Take your time," she said with a smile. "I'm pretty sure they'll wait for her."
I nodded again, making another cup, because if Bella was awake, she'd want a cup of her own. I heard the screen door shut as I made my way down the hall. Cracking open the door of our bedroom, I peeked inside, smiling at the sight before me. Apparently, Bethy had felt that if she couldn't stay in bed to take care of her mother, then Mr. Bunny would get the job done.
Bella was now curled up on my side of the bed on my pillow, her arms wrapped tightly around the stuffed animal. Just being in the same room with her made my heart beat easier. I let out a slow exhale, setting the coffee down on the dresser. I wanted to crawl in beside her, wrapping myself around her, but I was still sweaty and pretty rank, if I were to be honest. Bella had on more than one occasion yelled at me for doing just that – coming back to bed after a run. She didn't want to change the sheets after my "sweaty ass had mauled them."
I snorted to myself at that memory and walked into the bathroom.
~oOo~
BELLA
I blinked blearily awake to the smell of coffee and the sound of the shower running. I sat up in bed, setting Mr. Bunny aside. At one point, I had woken up to Bethy cuddling with me – a sweet gesture on Edward's part.
I crawled to the edge of the bed, stealing his cup of still steaming coffee with a giggle and leaning back against the headboard. The shower shut off, and his teasing growl made me laugh even harder.
"Woman, if you stole my coffee..."
I grinned like the Cheshire cat when he came out of the bathroom in just a towel, wearing a dramatically stern face.
"It's my last cup, so let me steal it with pride, Edward," I told him, taking a sip.
"Coffee thief," he muttered, smirking at my laugh. He crawled up the bed, plopping down on his side next to me. "You look better."
I smiled, leaning over to kiss his scruffy jaw. "I feel better. Thank you. Tell me you made breakfast."
He laughed, shaking his head. "No, ma'am, I'm sorry. I will, though. Bethy had just a bowl of cereal."
"Please," I gushed, feeling famished.
"Whatever you want, baby," he whispered, kissing my temple, his hand immediately finding purchase on my stomach. He dragged up my t-shirt, leaning down and kissing my belly, rubbing his scruff just enough to make me giggle. "Are you gonna go easy on Mom?" he asked against my skin, placing kiss after kiss to my stomach. "Your sister was hellfire, let me just tell you."
I laughed, my head falling back to the headboard of our bed. Fuck, I'd forgotten just how much I loved him talking to my stomach that way. It was like he was bonding with them already. I'm not sure that's not why he and Bethy were so freakin' close. And the bigger my belly had gotten, the more she had responded to his voice. By the time she arrived, it was like she already knew him.
Edward chuckled low, tickling my skin with his stubble, brushes of his lips, and teases of his tongue. "Morning sickness, crazy cravings, fits of rage," he said, laughing when I gasped and look down at him, but his face sobered quickly as he continued to speak to my tummy. "She's the best mommy in the world, but you gotta go easy on her, little one..."
"Edward," I breathed, running my fingers through his damp hair.
"She's tired and scared...and I'm pretty sure I drive her crazy." He whispered the last part like it was a secret, and I smirked down at him. "We all need her safe and calm and healthy, because we all love her too much, so be good for Daddy, okay?"
By the time he finished, I had tears streaming down my face. Happy ones, scared ones, and ones that were an overflow of everything else. I pulled at him until he hovered over me.
"I promise you, sweetness," he whispered, pressing his forehead to mine. "I'll do the very best I can to get us all safely out of this." He gave my lips a quick kiss. "We could walk away...let Dad and El finish it. I could take us to Aunt Kate's. I could fly us...have us there by tonight, baby."
Fuck, that was so damn tempting that I actually considered it for a moment, but it wasn't fair. We couldn't just run to keep ourselves safe, when no one had done that when we needed them.
"These people were there when we needed them the most, Edward," I sniffled. "As much as they would understand, it wouldn't be right to leave them in the middle of this. They need all of us."
"I know," he admitted, looking pained as he allowed some of his weight down on me. "I just... F-Fuck, Bella. I-I c-can't th-think s-straight a-about th-this sh-shit. I want to protect you, Bethy...us, but..."
I grabbed his face, making him focus on me. "It's all right, baby," I soothed him. "Let's just...take this one step at a time. Okay? Okay?" I urged, when he looked away guiltily. "No decisions without running it by the other, no rash missions. I'll work here – but Edward...you have to be careful with everything you do. Please."
He was nodding before I finished. "I will, sweetness. I have to."
"We need to get out there, don't we?" I sighed, wrapping my arms around his strong shoulders.
"Only if you feel up to it, baby," he sighed, laying his head on my chest and wrapping his whole body around mine.
"The quicker we help, the quicker we catch them, baby," I whispered against his hair, inhaling the clean scent of his shampoo.
"'Kay," he mumbled against my breast, which caused me to squirm. With one more kiss to my stomach, he sat up on his knees. "Then let's see what we can do, sweetness."
A/N...I know some of you were expecting a fight from Bella over Edward's over protectiveness. You'll hear why she isn't fighting him in the next chapter. Besides the fact that they've wanted this all along, there are more solid reasons. Trust me.
Like I said, this chapter almost wrote itself. The next one flowed right along with it and is already done, so yeah, Sunday will be the next posting.
Okay, so I wanted to rec a few fics to you. Some wonderful people have pimped mine, so I'm gonna pay it forward.
First, The Breakers by les16... OMG, this Edward owns me. Like completely and totally owns me. My friend has painted a stunning picture of the coast of Maine, and it makes me want to live there. I can't even tell you how badly I look forward to her posts. It's truly an addiction.
Next, Firefly in Summer by primarycolors. Oh, I have complete and total plot envy for this story. It's so original, so very beautiful, yet will completely rock your guessing game, because there is no way on this freakin' planet for you to figure out where she's going with it. Do not let the angst, the drama fool you... This is the most amazing story.
Lastly, Unanswered Prayers by SparklingTwilight. This goes against my usual no-angst policy, but there's not a thing this author has written that's not on my favorites list. Plus, I identify with this Bella so much that it was almost scary. Not to mention that this is probably the sweetest Edward...he's a touch older, completely calm and soothing, and an amazing friend.
So check these out. I don't have access to the links as I write this, but all of them can be found in my faves list on my profile.
Okay, I need to thank JenRar for the all hours, all access beta'ing she does, not to mention the help along the way. To GooberLou for pre-reading, because I have no shame in throwing ideas at her via text message. And MedusaInNY for bloggy things, and who is currently flipping the world the bird – good for you, love! :D – I hope you feel better, and I love you tons.
Now, let me hear you. I'm pretty sure I just blew your theory of Bella's rebellion out of the water. Reviews are better than Mercward fresh out of the shower, wearing nothing but a towel. Okay, yeah...no, they aren't, but still... LMAO Until next time, later. :)