"Akemi! Get back here!" I chase after the little boy Konan gave birth to a few weeks ago.

Pein used some jitsu to advance Akemi's growth to a 7 year old.

He's a smart 7 year old too!

I grab him by his arms and lift him up off the ground. He SCREAMS.

I drop him and cover my ears. That's the THIRD time.

Why was I stuck here with these two brats! I'm not there mom, there aunt, or there nanny, so why me!

Because Scarlet's finding them a school, Konan's shopping with Pein. Others either refused to help or were on a mission.

OH yes, the OTHER little monster.

Scarlet's twin girl. Mizu. The little brat keeps biting and tripping me!

Her twin BOY is nice and quiet, like Itachi, and I'm LOVING every bit of it! His name is Mitzumi.

"Mizu! Akemi! Where are you!" I walk down the stairs, and in a flash I'm at the bottom of steps, face first.

I'm gonna kill Mizu. Were the first thoughts in my head.

Then Scarlet will kill YOU

Who the hell are you and WHAT are you doing in my head!

I'm your innner, dumbass...

My inner's so mean...

Hi there!

AHHHH! Who're you!

Your second inner, silly!

Your a bipolar.

Am not!

Yo. I'm your third inner.

Ok, so maybe I AM bipolar... *sigh*

"Uke-sempai! Are you ok?" Mitzumi pokes my face.

Great, I'm being asked if I'm ok by a 7 year old. Am I REALLY that weak?

"The 'X' in your eye is gone." He points.

"Thank you for pointing out my freakish eye." I say sarcastically.

He just shrugs and goes back to the couch to watch TV.

"Hey there Uke-sempai!" Mizu teases.

"Go... Away..." I glare, then get a new idea. I grab her arm tightly, then go to the kitchen for some duct tape.

First I wrap up her legs... then her arms... and the rest of her body. I leave her head free.

"Uke! Lemme go! I'm telling mommy on you!" She protests as I carry her back to the living room.

"I'm not afraid of your mom." I shrug and set her on the floor, then tape her mouth shut.

She continues her screams of protests, before I put some tape over her mouth.

I then look to Akemi who was trying to sneak through the room, "Sit down and watch TV, or else you end up like Mizu here."

He gives a quick nod, then sits down obediantly.

I flop back on the couch t catch some Z's... but everyone came pouring through the door.

I glare at them all for interupting my sleep.

"Uke! Why the hell is Mizu tied in duct tape!" Scarlet yells.

"She was playing with it while i was knocked out form her tripping me down the stairs." I shrug. "I swear, these kids are gonna be the death of me..."

"They sure will if you don't stop abusing them!" She threatens.

"What? WHAT! ME abuse THEM! Its more like the other way around!" I protest.

"How do I know your not LYING!"

"Check the stairs for toys and blood." I mumble dryly.= walking off to be alone for the time being.

Akemi, for WHATVER reason, tags along.

"Uke! Uke! Uke!" He repeats my name over and oevr until we get to our room. "Uke-nii chan!" That's what catches my attention.

"What?"

"Your eyes!" He points. "They're grey! Both of them now! And there's no 'X'!"

I guess I looked surprised so he said, "What? Just a surprised look? No snotty come back?"

"No...not this time..." I disapear into my room and take a look at my eyes in the mirror. "Holy Crap, he wasn't lying..."

With a quick pause, I get some siccors. I cut my bangs so they were covering both my eyes. I looked almost eyeless.

"Perfect." I mumble laying down to catch some Z's.

~~~1 week later~~~

"Wait! Why do I have to baby sit them all them time!" I protest as people start filing out the door. "What am I? There Nanny! ...Don't answer that."

"One, because your the only one I trust outta all these phsyco's," Scarlet explains. "And two, people seem to be after you, so I really don't think you should leave the base with your clumsy ass."

I glare at her as she turns away and leaves.

At least the 2 monsters and second Itachi are sleep. I kick back for the time being, then...

Crap. I fell asleep! AHHH!

And the house was pretty quiet... Argh, Scarlet's gonna KILL me! And then so will Konan! Maybe even Pein and Itachi too! AHHH!

CALM THE FUCK DOWN, WOMAN!

Hehehe~! I heard an explosion earlier over near the kids room!

Inner...2?

Yeah?

I'm gonna kill you for not telling me this earlier!

I jump up and head for the kids rooms.

"C'mon! Please be there! Please be there in one piece!" I quietly beg. "Please just be the monsters playing with Deidara's bombs! Please!"

No such luck.

Blood. Everywhere. Room? Ruined... a huge HOLE in the wall AGH! I'm gonna die, I just know it! I lost 3 little 7 year olds with agreesive parents!

"FUUUCK!" I scream running out the hole in the wall, following drag marks... and BLONDE hair... none of the kids had blonde hair!

PROOF:

Akemi: Orange hair

Mizu: Red hair

Mitzumi: Black hair

...it's like an emo rainbow...

I follow the tracks quickly, deeper and deeper into the forest to who knows where?

I finally come to a huge cave-house. Kinda like the Akatsuki base, but screams were coming from the inside.

Kid screams.

"UKE-SEMPAI!" Mizu's high-pitched voice.

I have a sudden, scary realization: If the kids are hurt to badly, they'll find out, and I'll be a train wreck again.

I hold back some yells of shock and run into the cave full speed. Listening for Mizu's screams.

"Shut it, kid!" A teasing high voice. The voice of a fangirl hench...girl? The sound of a whip cracking, the crying gets louder.

I pull out a kunai and barge into the room.

I was a bit shocked, the kid in here was Mitzumi. I had NEVER seen him show ANY emotion, let alone crying.

The fangirl gasps in shock, "Head Mis-"

I cut her throat impulsively, then kinda like stare down at the girl while she was dying. Hey, my mind was still on the fact that I was gonna be OBLITERATED if any of the parents found out.

Mitzumi looks away from me, which was rather hard to do chained to a wall by your arms and legs.

I set him free(after finding the key in the fangirls... cleavage) and told him to hide in a broken tree outside while I get the other two.

He gives a quick nod then looks up at me, "Will you be OK?"

"Here? Yes, totally. Back at home? Maybe not..." I partly joke.

He gives a little laugh, "Well, then that's normal." He runs off before I can say anything else.

I shake my head and rub my temples, going to search for the other two kids.

I walked halfway down the corrider until I FINALLY got to a door that had what I was looking for... at least one of the things.

This time was Akemi.

Scarlet's gonna kill me... unless someone beats her to it.

I sneak into the room. His eyes were closed, his head sagging to one side. He was COVERED in whip marks! AGH!

I quickly cut the ropes holding him and hold him bridal style.

"C'mon Akemi, wake up!" I say urgently.

"N-No more..." He whimpers barely opening his eyes. "P-Please..."

First time he ever said please.

"Open your eyes." I whisper.

He opens them a little more, and a small smile birghtens his face, "Uke!" He yell-whispers.

"SHHH! Go to the front with Mitzumi! I'm gonna go find Scarlet!"

"She's in the room by the water fountain, at the very end of the second corrider." He says quickly then stares at me for awhile.

"What's with the stares?" I ask setting him down.

"I just... wanna recognize your face before Scarlet gets to you..." He says nonchalantly walking down the corrider.

"Yeah, that makes me feel MUCH better, Akemi! Thanks a lot!" I say sarcastically.

Scarlet's gonna maime you, not kill you.

Yes, and that's makes me feel GREAT, inner..3... by the way, that was sarcasm.

I keep walking down the corrider, until I come to a HUMONGUS water fountain. Screams come from a door next to me.

"SOP IT! I SWEAR WHEN UKE-SEMPAI GETS HERE, SHE'S GONNA HAVE YOU FOR BREAKFAST!" She screams.

"Oy..." I mumble.

"I'm serious, I don't remember her eating ANYTHING today."

"Thanks for reminding me." I mumble dryly as my tummy growls. I enter the room, 4 sets of eyes on me.

1 was Mizu's, 2 others were fanboy henchmen, and the last was that tentacle lady from last time. She had blonde hair.

"Yo! I saw all yer hair on the way here! Are ya really that old?" I joke smirking. "And maybe I WILL eat you for breakfast! I like seafood, I really do!"

"Get away from me!" The lady hisses, I'm gonna call her TL for Tentacle Lady,... ew, now I'm reminded of yaoi and hentai!

I get a look at Mizu and say, "Ok, Scarlet won't notice that. I'll just tell her you fell down the steps."

Mizu looks away, not saying a word, for once.

I walk over to her, keeping a close eye on TL.

"So... where's the key?" I ask curiously.

She whips a key out her cleavage- what is WITH people here sticking stuff in there junk!- and hands it to one of the fanboys who sticks it-you guessed it- down his pants.

I twitch with annoyance that i was gonna have to get the key one way or the other.

"Awww? Is the little Uke to modest to get the key?" TL teases.

I WAS to modest, and easily embarrased at most. I would never ever EVER- I did it. I tackled the boy, stuck my hand down there and grabbed the key quick as possible.

Then freed Mizu, running full speed.

"Look how RED she is!" TL teases. "She must really love these children!"

I get outside and then I wish I didn't because I saw the full extent to the little kids' damages.

"I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die." I chant banging my head into a tree.

"It'll be ok, Uke-sempai!" Mitzumi tries to cheer me up.

"Scarlet's gonna KILL me! Just LOOK at you and SCarlet! How come Akemi was hurt as much! He just has a mark across his stomach!"

Akemi turns around and moons me.

"...and his ass... ergh..." I rub my temples feeling a splitting head ache again.

"Let's go home now, ok!" Mizu grabs my hand and tugs.

I sit on the couch with the kids, rubbing burn cream and rash cream on them, hoping it would make the marks go away. It didn't, because since when do things go MY way!

First Sasori, Tobi, and Deidara enter and go into the kitchen without a second glance. Then Kisame, Hidan, and Kakuzu. They pause real quick, then quickly keep going snickering. I didn't see Zetsu come in, which I usually don't. Coal and Sasuke get an eye full of me and the kids then quickly run off mumbling something about, avoiding hell.

Then comes in hell. Itachi, Scarlet, Pein, and Konan.

They freeze and all stare at us in shock.

"Uke... what happened...?" Itachi growls walking up to me.

"Uhhh..." I stare. He looked pretty pissed off that his children were covered in whip marks. "Well... the kids..."

"We got kidnapped by these chicks dressed like skanks!" Mizu announces giggling.

I shrink back as Scarlet steps forward glaring, flames practically surronding her and Itachi.

"And they tortured us with whips and chains and they tried to drown Mizu!" Akemi adds lifting up his shirt to show the marks on his stomach.

And now I'm gonna die... I sigh mentally.

"All because Uke fell asleep!" Mitzumi adds jumping up.

"NOW of ALL times you wanna speak!" I exclaim resisting the urge to hit him.

He just shrugs.

"My babies... were whipped and drowned and captured... because you... fell asleep?" Scarlet growls, her eyes darkening.

Itach's eyes widen and he steps back, along with Pein and Konan.

I should probaly run now...

"UKe! I'm gonna KILL you!" She screams lunging at me.

I scream too, but more in fear, and jump off the couch. Running full speed away from Scarlet.

"Get your ass back over here!" She screams as I run onto the training grounds.

Bombs were going off... stupid Deidara.

"AAAHH! I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry!" I yell dodging bombs.

"Sorry dosen't cut it! You and your sleeping habits!" She screams throwing a bomb from SOMEWHERE. "I'll make it so you never sleep AGAIN!"

I scream again and jump into the trees running hard in fast.

"Ergh! She's like an angry mother bear!" I grumble to myself. "Boy do I HATE kids."

She caught me. It took her 4 days to do it, but she caught me.

Now I'm half awake. No. Half ALIVE in the infirmary. Everyone else was sleep.

"I will never again... babysit children..." I gurgle in pain. I couldn't even fall asleep cause SOMEONE gave me a big black eye that hurt to close.

"I'm sure you won't be anytime soon." A voice I couldn't recognize.

"Itachi, if that's you to finish me off. I'd like to be fed first." I grumble annoyedly turning over.

A light chuckle. "No actually it's Sasuke. The less... hostile one..."

"Great to see you..." I say half-sarcastically. Mainly cause he's one of the few people that haven't hurt me in any way, made some fucked up jokes, or been payed by Scarlet to drop me off the top of the base.

"Hn." There's that sound again. "So can you move yet?"

"I can sit up if that's what you mean." I sit up slowly and lean on the bed to demonstrate.

"Typical you, healing a lot faster than anyone else would." He smirks.

"After really meeting you... I like you better than Itachi..." I mumble unwilling.

No reply.

"Sasuke?" I look around the dark, seeing nothing out of my ONE eye. "Hm."

"You changed your hair..." He finally says.

"So?"

"Why?"

"To cover my eyes..."

"Why?" He asks again.

"Cause they turned grey..." I mumble laying back down. "It makes me look like a freak."

"Around here? Yeah right, it takes a lot to be a freak." He chuckles. "But your purple and blue skin and black eye makes you look a lot more freakish."

"Yeah, that's real nice..." I mumble, done talking to the SANE Uchiha, who didn't let his girlfriend halfway kill me.

"I see your done talking... it's to bad you can't eat..."

"WHAT!" I shoot up surprised.

"One of the many times she stabbed you cut through your stomach slightly. You can't eat." He restates with a faint smirk.

"URGH!" I grumble falling back down onto the bed. "I'm gonna STARVE to death!"

"Only half to death." He shrugs getting up to leave.

"I'm already half dead, I'd be fully dead after starving half to death!" I correct.

"Your fun talking too." He mumbles leaving.

Wait. Did I hear that right! Probaly just the Novocain kicking in again.