Tony Jr.'s Birthday

Another chapter in the "Just a little bit of news" universe...

Notes: RDJ once said (talking about an Iron Man action figure) that Tony Stark's face looked like Scott Baio's.

I'll post the next chapter later today.

"Mrs. Stark and Tony Jr. are back, sir."

"Oh, good," Tony said. "Thanks, JARVIS." He removed his goggles and set them aside, then started climbing down the armor he'd been working on, with nary a word to the man working on the opposite side.

Coronel Rhodes hastily removed his own goggles. "Hey! Where the hell are you going?"

"Upstairs." Tony glanced over his shoulder. "We'll finish this later, ok?"

"What do you mean, 'later'? This is an emergency!"

"No, it's not. You're not going on a mission. are you?"

"Well, no, but -"

"And if you gotta go, then I'll lend you one of those," and Tony waved at the Iron Man armors lined along the wall.

"Those are too small for me," Rhodey said spitefully. "Hey!" he called out, hurrying after Tony, who was already at the door. Soon, Rhodey was climbing the stairs like Tony -two at a time. "What's going on? So your family's returning from a little shopping trip to the mall –big deal. Meanwhile, my War Machine suit's sprout a leak that could get me killed, and –"

"-and I'll fix it in no time," Tony finished. He must have realized his friend deserved an explanation though, because he stopped. "Look. I really need to talk to Pepper, right now." He lowered his voice to add, "You know Tony Jr.'s birthday's coming up, right?"

"Oh, yeah. My nephews got their invites last week."

"He insisted. Anyway, we wanna give him something nice -something he really likes. We could have just asked him, but we want it to be a surprise, so -"

"-so, Pepper took him shopping so she could find out what the little tyke likes."

"Exactly." Tony started climbing again. "I think he's gonna like the Iron Man in the Mark XI Armor gift set. The Mark X's got all the extras, but -"

"What if he likes the new Malibu Barbie better?" Rhodey said snidely; "Did you think of that?"

Tony stopped abruptly.

"He better not," he said ominously.

"Oh, yeah? Why not?"

"She's way too tall for the Iron Man action figures he's already got."

By the time they made it upstairs, Pepper had already hauled a couple of shopping bags inside and Tony Jr. was rolling on the rug, playing with a puppy.

Rhodes smiled to himself. That was one scene he never expected to witness.

He glanced sideways at Tony. Teasing him about the puppy never got old in Rhodey's book.

"So, Mr. Stark? Did you or did you not say you'd never let a dog put a paw inside your house?"

"Dog?" Tony replied. "What dog? I don't see any dog. If you mean that thing on the rug, that's my son's live tissue plush toy. Stark Industries' latest invention," he added boldly.

Rhodey grinned. Turning his attention back to the boy and the dog, he said, in a booming voice, "What's that flea-bag doing in the house?"

Tony Jr., looked up.

"I'm playing with Bobby, Uncle Rhodey."

Pepper looked up sharply, not at Tony Jr. but at his father.

Tony gave her his most innocent look. "What? It's a little joke between us. Right, champ?" and he ruffled Tony's hair.

"Yes, daddy. You're a flea-bag too!"

"Right. Hey, you mind if I go help your mommy?"

"No, daddy."

Tony and Rhodes brought the last shopping bags into the kitchen. Once his arms were free, Tony wrapped them around Pepper, who was busy washing apples.

"Well, babe?" he said, "Did you find out what he wants for his birthday?"

Pepper reached for a towel before she answered.

"Um, yes, Tony; he did."

"And?"

"And I'll get it for him," she said evasively.

"We'll get it for him. You know I like shopping for toys."

"You like checking on the competition, you mean."

"That, too. So? What are we getting him?"

Pepper reluctantly turned. She looked at him for a moment, as if unsure on how to begin.

"Tony, I..."

"Yes?"

"I... think you'd better sit down."

"Wha - what? Why? Oh, shit, don't tell me he wants another drum set -"

"No. No, it isn't that. It's -"

"It's that flea-bag joke, isn't it?" He pulled back. "Oh, babe, I didn't mean any harm. I mean, it's just a little joke. I just thought -"

Pepper smiled despite herself. "It isn't that, either."

"Ok. Then what – Wait. He wants a Barbie doll, is that it? 'Cause if he does, then that's ok. I mean, I can deal with that –contrary to what some people might think," he added, glaring at Rhodey.

"No, honey," Pepper said gently. "He doesn't want a Barbie doll. He…Well. He saw this action figure that he liked, and -"

"Oh. Which one? Was it the one with the Mark XI suit, or -"

"Well, no. Actually, he, um -"

By now, Rhodes knew something was very wrong going on.

"Guys, I think I'll go downstairs to -"

But he stopped when he saw the pleading look on Pepper's eyes. 'Don't leave me alone,' the look said.

"-or maybe not," Rhodes muttered.

Pepper turned her attention back to Tony. She looked into his eyes.

"Tony," she said. "Our son wants a -" she gulped. "He -" Finally, she just closed her eyes and blurted out, "HewantsaRobocopactionfigure."

"What!"

Rhodes had closed his eyes too. Then he opened one eye and ventured one look, and –

Sweet Lord, Tony looked like he was about to get an apoplexy.

But he actually sounded more hurt than angry when he spoke. "Are you freaking kidding me? Robocop?"

Pepper put both hands on his shoulders.

"Tony, you've got to understand," she said patiently; "The movies got a revival -"

"There's a new cartoon too," Rhodes said. "All the little kids love that."

Pepper glared at him. 'You're not helping,' the look said.

Tony looked sincerely bewildered.

"But Iron Man's real! Iron Man trumps Robocop every time!"

"And we all know that," Pepper said soothingly; "But Tony; our son's is only four years old; he -"

"Yeah, man," Rhodey said. "He doesn't know Iron Man fights crime for real."

"But -"

Pepper touched Tony's face to regain his attention.

"We decided not to tell him till he turned five, remember?"

"Yeah, but -"

"Besides, it's not like he doesn't love Iron Man," she added, "She just liked the Robocop action figure better. The gift set includes a Harley-Davison -"

"Your toys don't come with bikes," Rhodey pointed out.

"Iron Man doesn't need a bike!" Tony retorted; "He flies, for God's sake!"

"- and Robocop's helmet is removable," Pepper added.

"Yeah, Tony," Rhodey said. "How come Iron Man's helmet isn't removable?"

"Hey, they can remove it once they come up with a face that looks remotely like mine! I mean, come on," he added, turning to Rhodey, "Do I look like Scott Baio?"

Rhodey looked closely. "Well… Now that you mention it…"

Pepper intervened then. She gently took Tony's face between her hands.

"Baby, please. Let him have the Robocop figure. It's his birthday."

"I didn't say I wasn't gonna buy it," Tony muttered.

"I know. I just need to know that you're ok with it."

Tony didn't immediately reply. He was trying not to look into Pepper's eyes –he knew he'd give in the minute he did. Finally, he looked. "Ok," he said, resigned. "Just give me some time, ok?"

And without a further word, he went downstairs to sulk -er, to work.

TBC

Last Christmas they sold an IM action figure that came with a motorcycle. And I thought, wait a minute! Iron Man doesn't need vehicles!