AN: Hmm ... Enjoy ?
x x x
[Chapter Four : Crazy ]
"They're not even your real brothers."
Yes, yes they are. Aren't they? They have to be. I can't live with out them, they are my brothers. I feel like they are, so they have to be, right? I was standing on the road somewhere. It was foggy at night. You could barely see anything, only the dim lights of the street lamps. I could hear echoes of foot steps, but when I turn around there is no-one there. I can hear faraway giggles. I hug myself, because it's starting to get cold.
Then out of no-where, ahead of me, there are two small kids. I recognize almost immediately who they are. Allen and Alden! I run for them, filled with happiness. However, they start running too. I run faster, reaching out for them. Their little legs seem to be fast then mine, and they are ahead of me. I could feel myself starting to sweat, worry and I become extremely scared. I can't reach them. They are gone. I stop running, and stare at my hands. They are shaking. I shove my face into my hands and start bawling. Screaming. Crying.
"They're not even your real brothers."
I jolt forward screaming, and try to find my breath. I see that I am still in my room. I look around frantically, just to make sure. After a moment or two, I am calm, and beside me is Kairi. Sleeping silently, curled up in a ball. I blink several times, wondering why she is here. Then it hits me, I asked her to stay with me. I smiled at the thought. She actually stayed with me the entire night. She is a good friend.
"Kairi …" I say quietly, and lightly shake her. She moans quietly, and her eyes flutter open. She sits up slowly, and rubs her eyes, smiling at me. "Good morning." I say quietly.
She nods. "Morning… What time is it?" I shrug, not really knowing myself. "I wonder, oh well!" and she lays back down, closing her eyes.
I laugh at her, and lay back down as well. "Thanks for staying with me." I tell her, and she's quiet for a moment.
"You kept talking about your brothers … in your sleep." She says, in almost a whisper. My eyes widened, and now I am sitting up, looking down at her with a worried feeling.
She sits up again too. "Don't worry! I don't know anything!" She says quickly, looking into my eyes.
I stare at her, and sigh. "They're not my real brothers … and my mom reminded me of that last night…" I say, looking away from her.
She puts her finger under my chin, and moves my face to look at her. She pulls my face in, and leans in. I blink. Her lips are against mine, kissing me. This time it's more different. It isn't a peck, like last time. This time she is forcing my mouth open. Her mouth, opening and closing with mine. Kissing me softly.
Then I realize, my eyes are closed too and I'm kissing her too. When I realize this, my heart starts to beat fast. I'm suddenly very anxious and worried. I don't know what I am feeling. I place my hands on her shoulders, and push her back. She only smiles at me, a wicked smile. I glare at her and jump out of bed, pacing back and forth in my little house.
"WHY …" I cover my mouth, and take a deep breath. "Why do you keep doing that? Are you a lesbian? Or Just Crazy?" I ask her bluntly, staring at her.
She shakes her head. "No." I nod. "But I know I am attracted to you." I groan. That makes no sense at all. Kairi is sitting on the bed, looking at me curiously. How come she is not freaking out too? I wonder. Then she says, "C'mon Namine … have a little fun." She gets, and stands in front of me.
I am suddenly frozen. "Like, what do you mean?" I ask. "And I thought you liked Sora?" I ask, almost angrily because I really thought she was mad at me for being friends with him or something.
She shook her head. "I didn't know what to say to you at the time. I like you." She smiled and my heart jumps. I can feel myself getting embarrassed. "It will be our little secret. Plus, I know you like me too." I blush.
"How - How - How did it turn out like THIS?" I yell at her, flustered and confused. Kairi only shrugs, and I sigh slapping my forehead.
"Namine, they are your real brothers. You love them, you care for them and your doing everything in power to help them." I slowly look up at her. "They are your brothers." She tells me with a straight, serious face. Tears fill my eyes, and I nod. She smiles and places her hand on my shoulder.
"Thanks." I mumble, and sit down on my bed. "So when's that party?" I ask, trying to change the subject. Not really in the mood to be talking about my family, or us.
Kairi places her finger to her chin, looking at the ceiling. "Umm … Tomorrow night." I gasp. "Yeah, that's why I was here in the first place, to tell you. You weren't home and I thought I'd wait for you." She tells me with a smile.
"Friday night …" I mumble and she nods. "Then we start school on Monday?" I ask, and she nods again. I sigh again, falling onto my back. "You guys sure are busy." She only chuckles and she gets up, and I jolt up, looking at her.
"Don't worry, I'll sleep over again tonight." She smiles, and waves. I stare at her as she walks out the door. Worry? I looked worried? I shrug and decide to go into the house.
Kira follows me happily into the house, and my grandparents are there. I blink several times, confused at why they are home. I look up at the clock and it turns out its eight in the morning. I smile, proud of not feeling all that tired.
"Good morning!" They both tell me with smiles. I smile back, nodding and help myself to a cup of coffee. I sat at the table with them and took a small breath. Feeling extremely calm for some odd reason. "Honey, are you okay?" My grandpa asked quietly, and I stared at him.
I smiled. "Yup! Whatever my mother said, is a lie. She is not herself right now, but one day she will be back. When I get older and stronger, I decided I want to help my mom out too." I say, without really thinking about it. However, I did feel better when I did say it, like a whole lot lifted off my shoulders. "I know deep down, she wants to go back to normal." I lowered my eyes, and before I knew it, they were behind me.
"You're right. She needs our help right now. Your mom is sick, our daughter is sick, so that's why we asked her to come live with us." I jumped out from my seat, and stared at them in horror. I felt guilty for being so angry right now.
I wanted her here, I didn't want her here, I want her to hold me, I never wanted to see her again, so many mixed emotions about my mother. I stepped back and inhaled a huge breath, and exhaled. I could do this, I can handle this. I forced a smile to my face, and they smiled weakly at me. The only good thing about this was that my brothers were coming too.
"What about dad?" I wondered, sitting back down at the table.
They both looked at me, across the table now, and looked away just as quickly. "He still wants to work in the city and stay there, save up money. Your mom is not as strong as him." They said with a little too much guiltiness, but I shrugged. I didn't really care for him anyway. "They'll be in tomorrow night." I cringed.
Deep breath, Namine. My brothers will be here sooner then I thought, they will be here. They will keep me sane. I nodded slowly, a little unsure on how to feel about all this. It was too fast for me. I sipped away at my coffee, while my grandparents got ready for work and left. I was sitting in the kitchen by myself now, and didn't know what to think.
My mom looked exactly like me, only she had green eyes like my grandmother. Light jade green eye, they were the brightest eyes at one time. However, now they are dim and distant. I closed my eyes, remembering her every move. It was like my mother had passed away or something. That's how it felt, but then again, I don't know how that feels. I have never lost anyone before, expect maybe an uncle or auntie I have never heard about or maybe a distant cousin. So I wouldn't really have a clue, but I'm only imagining it and even imagining it, hurts. It hurts so much, that I don't think my heart could take it.
I open my eyes, and stare at the wall in front of me. But I have too. My heart does have to take it, I have to help my mom. Being addicted to drugs and alcohol is not healthy or good for anyone. Only if, ten years ago she never met my "dad". Then she would be normal and happy like she was before. Then again, that's something I can't say because he did give my brothers, I groaned. Only if they never got into drugs. I got myself another cup of coffee and the phone rang. I went to go and answer it.
"Hello, May I speak to Namine?"
"This is her." I say politely.
"Hello, this is Aerith. We had the interview the other day. I wanted to call and tell you, that you got the job for housekeeping. You will be starting September First, from 5 to 10 at eleven dollars an hour. "
I couldn't help but smile. "Thank you, Thank you so much! I will be there! You can count on it!" I tell her, half crying, half laughing. She giggles at my excitement and hangs up the phone. Kira is suddenly at feet, yipping and jumping around me with the same excitement.
Then I stop jumping up and down, tomorrow is the party and tomorrow my mother is coming in. I fall to my knees and yell, Kira jumps into my lap and yawns. I began stroking his head. What to do know? I start school on Monday, as long as my new job. I only get a Saturdays break. I groan, and carry Kira and place him on the couch.
I seriously have no clue what to do, so I pick up the phone and call Kairi. It rings a few times, and out of no where my heart begins to race. I quickly hang up the phone feeling flustered and embarrassed. "What is wrong with me…" I say aloud, and I jump at the phone ringing. I stare at it a few time, and slowly answer it. "H-Hello?"
"Namine?" It's Kairi. "The caller ID said you just called, sorry I was in the bathroom."
"It's okay. I just … had something to tell you." So I told her. I told her that my mom was coming in tomorrow night, and that I got a new job. She listens intently to my problem about my mom, and I tell her everything that happened in the city. I talk and talk, and realize I've been talking too long. "Sorry …" I end up saying.
"For what?" She asks quietly.
"Talking too much about nothing." I say, sheepishly.
She giggles. "Don't apologize for telling me your problems. I'd like to help anyway I can, Namine." I blush, and nod. Luckily, she can't see me. "Anyway, the bus gets in around five tomorrow, and the party is way later then that. So you have nothing to worry about. As for work and school, we all do it. You'll get used to it."
I sigh in relief. "Thanks. I always take things way too seriously … " I sigh again. "It's way bad for my health." and we both laugh. "So, who's coming to the party? I can't imagine too much, this town is too small." I giggle.
"It's small, but there's about over 20,000 people here. Everything is spread apart, farm lands and everything." Kairi tells me, matter-of-factly. I roll my eyes. "Anyway, Natsu and Lucy. They like each other, but they're both stupid to know it. Um, Sakura and Syaoran. Sora, Riku, Xion, Roxas and his brother Ventus. Axel. Lots of other people too." She takes a deep breath.
I laugh. "Whoa. Sorry for asking, that is a lot of people! I can't wait to meet them all. It sounds like fun." I smile, and try to imagine it all. "Anyway, tomorrow will you come with me to pick up my mom and brothers?" I ask, without thinking.
"Sure. Plus, your brothers sound cute!" She laughs. "Anyway, I still need to have a shower and I'll come over right after, and sleep over." I agreed and we both hang up. I sit there for a moment, and see that Kira is sleeping by my feet. I smile at him, my brothers are going to like him, I tell myself. I get up and stretch and decide I am in need of a nice hot bubble bath.
x x x
Kairi did sleep over last night, like she said she would. I was surprisingly happy that she slept over. We talked pretty much all night, about everything. I told her where I moved and who I met, and what I saw. She told about her life here, and everyone that changed and how she changed. We listened to each other, as we talked, laying there. Eventually the both of us fell asleep. It was the best night of my life, letting someone into my heart.
Letting them know who I am, and what I feel. I don't care if Kairi has a crush on me or something, I like having her with me and I hope she doesn't go anywhere. I hope she stays with me, I need her right now and I let her know that. She thanked me and kissed me on the cheek. I blushed. Not because I like her too, but it's embarrassing when someone likes you, and they kiss you. Well, at least I don't think I like her. I mean I like her, but I don't know if it's like the way she likes me. When I look at her, I feel something, but I don't know what it is.
The next evening, the four us set off to the bus depot. We sat in the back of the truck, and I couldn't help but feel scared. I didn't want to see her. She was mean and selfish. I cringed, just thinking of the reason why I left. Suddenly, there was a hand on mind, I looked at Kairi and she wasn't looking at me. I blinked, wondering if she did that on purpose or didn't know. I ended up holding her hand the ride there. I needed to know someone was there for me if anything happened.
We pulled up to the bus depot, and the bus was already there. I was scared to walk into the building, feeling frightened and excited at the same.
Hold me.
Don't touch me.
Never let me go.
Stay away from me.
I looked up, and saw my brothers. With there bright blue eyes and golden blonde hair. They both grinned while they cried and ran at me with full force. I couldn't help but start to cry too, I held them in my arms. Smelling them, feeling them, never wanting to let them go. I missed them so much, it was hard to explain. I looked up, and saw my mother standing there. Looking crazy mad, lighting a smoke, and glaring at me.
"As if you run to them before me." She spits. I cringe.
"They're just children, Mom. They're my brothers, I love them." I say, and look away and continue to hold them. All she does is roll her eyes and walk past us all. My fragile grandpa and grandma try to grab the bags, and we eventually help them put them in the back of the truck. She is standing there, tapping her foot looking annoyed already.
"Where do me and the kids sit? There is only room in the front for three people." She says, glaring at us.
"We sit in the back on the sides. No-one really cares around here." I tell her and she rolls her eyes again and jumps in the back. I sit next to my brothers, and Kairi is on the other side of them. Mom jumps into the front, and I don't know what to feel. This is all so exhausting. When we get home, we unload their things for them. She, of course, complains why I get my own "house" and they don't.
We try our best to explain to them that this is the best we could do. After long, what seem years, we finally get them in and accustomed. I run out the back and into my little shack, and Kairi follows me.
First thing I do is burst out crying. She only looks at me sadly, and I decided something then and there. I lunge at Kairi, placing my lips on hers. Kissing her, opening her mouth and feeling her tongue inside of mine. She doesn't object, she doesn't pull away.
I can be tough,
I can be strong,
but with you,
it's not like that all
I pull away, and she looks at me with a soft smile. "Your crazy..." She whispers. I only blush, and look away. She only giggles, and I look to the side and see my mother standing there. She's standing there with a smoke in her hand, and I look at Kairi and then I look at my mom. My brothers come running beside her with Kira, but … My mom saw? She saw what I just did?
No.
x x x
EN: I laughed so hard at Namine, Kairi, and Xion . It was like having a party by herself . However, oh well, they are completely separate people in this story, and all relationships that were in Kingdom Hearts, if there was any, Like I know Sora and Kairi, or Riku and Sora ? But they're all just friends with crushes it seems ? haha . I don't know . But they don't matter in this story ! Muhahaha . I hope you enjoyed !