Beck's point of view

I watched as Jade was trying sleep. She tossed and turned and could not stay asleep. I had only seen her this upset a few times. This time with Willow's treatment really made Jade depressed and worried but she was trying so hard to be strong.

"Jade," I said firmly, "Babe it is going to be okay."

"She was in so much pain," Jade said, "I wished I could have taken it for her"

"I wish I could too," I told her, "This hurts me horribly but we know it's what's best for her"

"What's best for her is never to have been raped in the first place," Jade said, "This is killing me. I wish I could have stopped it. I would rather have relived my own rape then having Willow go through it"

Jade's point of view

It's funny. Before this happened the problems I thought were so horrible were things that I look back on now and don't understand why it matters. One memory stands in my mind about the day before Willow's rape happened. That was what we were arguing about before the phone call. Beck and I had a deal. The class was going on a trip to France... well anyone at step 18 and above and I was only at step 15. Beck and I had a deal that if I were nice to Tori for 3 months I would be allowed to go on the trip. But I had a really bad day and I didn't make it.

"Jade," Beck had said, "Do you remember our agreement"

I looked at Beck kind of confused.

"Our agreement?"

"Yes," he said, "You promised you would be nice to Tori and you broke the deal which means that you are unfortunately not going to be able to go on the Paris trip"

Memories stirring the dam broke and I sobbed uncontrollably. The past while since this happened had been nightmare after nightmare after nightmare. I wanted Willow to be alright. I wanted everything to be right again. I just didn't want to mess it up again.

Tori's point of view

I can't stop thinking about Jade and Willow and Beck and this whole situation. This is like a nightmare to forget but a nightmare that can't be forgotten. I can't sleep and I know Jade can't sleep either. I go across the hall to her room and knock lightly on the door.

"Come in Vega," Jade said

I opened the door and came in.

"Did I wake you up with my crying," Jade asked.

"No," I said, "I was crying too. Listen" I sat down by her bedside, "I know how you're feeling right now. I am as worried as you are. I know you might not believe this but I love Willow too"

Jade as much of a mess as she looked just looked at me and said, "I DO believe that Tori"

Jade's point of view

Vega is annoying. She is irritating. She kissed my boyfriend on the 2nd day she got to Hollywood Arts. But the thing is, none of that matter right now. Vega may be all these things but she's really a loyal friend. She loves deeply. She cares tremendously and in reality I am very blessed to have a friend like Vega in my life. No. I take it back. I am very blessed to have Tori in my life.

"Tori," I said, "Thank you"

"For what," Tori asked confused.

"For being my friend," I said, "I was always so mean to you. I really don't deserve your friendship."

Beck's point of view

"Jade," I told her, "Friendship and love aren't things that are earned."

"Sometimes," Jade said, "I feel like a lost little girl. I'm scared. I feel all alone"

"Well your not," I told her, "and you'll never be alone"

"Well when you all go to France I'll be alone,"

I brushed aside a tear.

"I don't think that will be happening any time soon," I said, "I mean with Willow's condition and everything else..."

I paused. What was I thinking? My thoughts were all jumbled up.

"It's going to be alright," I promised.

Jade's point of view

It's going to be alright, Beck said and I knew he was right. Everything always ended up being okay in the end. It's just that sometimes it seems to be a long road getting there. I just want Willow to be okay. I want my daughter to be better.

After my rape had happened I clung to Beck and I was actually afraid to be without him. I wouldn't cling to Willow though. I loved her. I adored her. I coddled her and at the same time I let her be a child. I didn't encourage stuff that was wrong because children grow up and I didn't want my daughter to grow up any quicker then she had to. She was my pride and joy. No she IS my pride and joy. I will not talk about her like she's dead