Disclaimer: Versions of these characters belong to Stephenie Meyer in another time and place. I am making them have lesbian sex with each other.
soo its coming to an end. i know. please dont cry. im really considering posting an emmett/jake os. i just havent convinced myself i should yet.
my bba is done with his mcats and i couldnt be happier. and my bf hasnt worn pants in 2 days and i couldnt be happier. ON Labbit, Harlow, Melissa228 and Hunterhunting, you guys freakin' rock my world. flor im glad youre still alive. i also popped brooke_babes88's forum cherry as i was typing this AN. welcome to the debauch hun. :)
this chapter is for erica who almost got murdered by beer and fangirliness at twicon this weekend and is trying to recover. and for my stephie who is just cracking me up on chat right now.
this chapter had no beta. if u find something TELL ME.
Chapter 17: Love me Still
… here are the eyes that only see you, here is the mouth that only calls your name, here is the soul that can not kill. I love you now, do you love me still…
- Leah's POV -
Christmas had been the turning point. I know, a little too late. I had already done so much damage. I had made Bella cry over and over. I had lied to her, played with her emotions, pulled her close and pushed her away. I'd ruined everything.
Seeing her face that last day, the last day our families spent together at my mother's house, I knew that even though Emily had torn me apart, I had broken the heart of the one person who was able to put me back together.
Bella left Forks and I dreaded what I would come home to. She had been there for me for the last time. She'd held my hand, kissed me, stayed by my side to help me get through the holidays. I knew how I felt and even though she was playing what she thought was her part, I could see that her feelings for me were still there.
Every time she returned to my side and let me hold her, I could feel the spark. But the light in her eyes was gone. The sincere laugh was replaced with deep sighs. The genuine smile replaced with a forced look of contentment. I, the victim, had officially become the culprit. I'd broken Bella's heart. When she'd made me come so expertly in her kitchen, I felt the urgency in her grasp. The anger surging through her still wasn't enough for her to actually hurt me.
And then she'd said the words, even after that heartless text I'd sent to her, she said the words.
"I don't know how I could either, but I do."
Mom and Jake were there for me to lend a supportive ear, but the conversations always ended the same way.
"Do you love her?" They'd asked.
"Yes," I'd replied undeniably.
"Then you have to fix it. You have to apologize. You have to tell her how you feel. You have to promise never to hurt her again and then you have to stick to it." It was the only logical conclusion. I knew it was the only way to salvage even a little bit of what we had. If I were lucky things between us wouldn't be so far gone that Bella wouldn't listen. If I were lucky Bella would at least hear me out and consider the new deal I had to offer.
If I got what I deserved Bella would move out, leaving me to pick up the pieces of what the break up would do to the girls.
I came back into town late Saturday. Without Bella I was too depressed to get off my couch. I skipped the New Year's party Jake had for the crew. I knew Emily and Sam would be there and even though I was over their bullshit, I just couldn't handle being around them with out Bella by my side, holding me up.
The girls were already asleep when I got back to our house. My three gorgeous ladies were passed out in Rosalie's bed. I'd wanted to join them and feel the warmth of the love they shared even in their sleep. But now, even in her sleep I could see how unhappy Bella was. She'd been sleeping so soundly before our last fight. In the few moments I watched them, she turned restlessly in Rosalie's arm, a frown clouding her face.
It had been two weeks since our fight and Bella had been back in L.A. for three days. Still she was dealing with the fucked up things I had done and said.
I crawled in my bed alone, prepared to fix things the first chance I got. I fell asleep looking through all the pictures I had of her on my phone. All one hundred and fifty of them.
I caught up with Rose in the morning. I was pumped to hear that Alice was already out and Rosalie would be gone for day with her mother.
We stood by the door. Rose was irritated with me, but she let me talk. Clearly Bella wasn't the only person I'd pushed to her limit.
"She's okay, but I don't know Lee. Really she can't do this shit with you much longer," Rosalie said, eying her key ring.
"I know."
"Do you, though?" Sh peered up at me, a silent ultimatum in her eyes. It occurred to me then. Bella may not leave, but they might ask me to go. The first time we'd been through this, Emily had been in the wrong. That was clear. There was no choice but to kick her out. Now - I was the problem.
I straightened my spine before I replied. "Yes. I do." There were a few moments of silence before I spoke again, my confidence wavering. "What do you think I should –"
Rose cut me off. "No. I'm staying out of it." My face must have shown my confusion. Rosalie was always the first to offer her opinion. "Bella asked me to and I'm going to respect that."
"I see."
She took my hand, gently caressing my fingers. I looked at our hands then up to her sparkling blue eyes. "Babe, I know you. I know you can fix this. You can show her the wonderful person I've seen. Just be honest."
I closed my eyes. I'd been pretty upfront with Rose and Alice, but still they didn't know the weight of it all. Bella would soon and I'd see how all three of them felt about it.
Rosalie kissed my lips for a few moments, a show of her love for me and an offer of a little bit of encouragement. It wasn't exactly enough to help me pull my foot all the way the way out of my mouth, but I was out of time and it would have to do.
I stood at the bottom of the stairs and listened to Rosalie drive away. Bella was upstairs alone. It was time.
Taking a deep breath did nothing to calm my nerves, but it would be beyond stupid of me to back out now.
Maybe you can break the ice somehow – see how she feels about being in the same room with you first, I thought. It was definitely a way to approach things.
Rosalie's bed was empty and so were both bathrooms. I took the final steps to her bedroom door to formulate a plan. Of sorts.
Another deep breath and I knocked on the door.
"Come in," she said softly. She knew it was me.
I opened the door slowly. Bella was sitting on the foot of her bed. Her face was a little red and blotchy like she'd just been crying, but she still looked amazing. Her hair was down, sweeping over her shoulders. All she had on was a pair of royal blue panties and tight black wife beater that did nothing to conceal her hard nipples. The wife beater was mine.
Behind her glasses her blood shot eyes gazed at me expectantly, but I didn't know what the stare meant. Either she eager for this first bit of contact in a few days, like I was or she was waiting for me to say whatever I had to say and just as eager for me to get the fuck out. I wouldn't know until I opened my mouth and tried.
The deep brown tore through me. I chickened out.
"You wanna go for a run?" I asked carefully.
She let out a deep sigh, the same one I'd heard a hundred times on my mom's couch. "Uh-yeah. Just let me get changed. I'll meet you down stairs in a minute."
"Okay," I said softly. Stupid ass.
I changed quickly and waited for her by the front door. I tried not to stare as she came walking down towards me. Bella was still a goddess in yoga pants and a long sleeved shirt. Her hair was up and she'd ditched her glasses and she hadn't brought her iPod.
She's giving you a chance to talk, I told myself.
I locked the door behind us knowing that this would be my only chance. I hadn't rehearsed the words in my head. I just knew how I felt and I had to just let those feeling flow.
There's a shitty thing about determination though. It doesn't change who you are, it doesn't equal courage. We ran and I said nothing. By the time we'd finished our first two miles, standing at the light on La Brea, I was still at a loss for words.
I tried not to look at her face, but I could see her growing more and more annoyed with every stride we took. She'd been slowing down intentionally during our runs. I had no idea why. I could keep up with her. But now she picked up the pace. I kept up with her all the way back to the house.
Bella waited not so patiently for me to open the front door. She was up the stairs, taking them three at time, before I could even bat an eyelash. I stood like a coward, listening as doors slammed and the shower came on.
I'd wanted to come clean. Instead I'd managed to piss her off all over again with my same silent bullshit. Way to go asshole.
If Bella didn't take off after her shower, I only had hours until the girls would be back and getting Bella alone would be significantly harder.
I showered quickly and dressed just as fast. I threw on some shorts and a threadbare Rolling Stones shirt I had, just to show her I wasn't planning on leaving the house any time soon.
She'd been back in her room for a while when I knocked again. When she let me in, I was surprised to see that she was still wrapped in her towel. She'd blow dried her hair.
She didn't say a word, just turned to her dresser and started digging for some underwear. I stepped inside and quietly closed the door behind me. I saw the muscles in her back flinch when she heard the soft click.
You see what you did to her – how uncomfortable you make her feel. Fix it asshole.
"Can we talk for a minute?" I asked.
"Sure. What about?" she said dryly. I'd heard that same tone come out of my mouth several times before. I'd taught her well.
"About us," I braved.
She stopped what she was doing, but didn't turn around. "I thought there was no us, remember? That's what you said. Twice." Her tone was the same, flat and low, but the words she threw back in my face hurt just the same.
"You're right."
She grabbed a pair of panties and slid the drawer shut with a little bit more force than necessary. Then she dropped her towel. God, she was gorgeous. I tried so hard not to stare at her perfect ass and then as she turned around her beautiful breasts, but it was impossible. I loved her fantastic body, every inch of it. But I had to focus.
"That's what I wanted to talk to you about. "
"So talk." Bella bent over and stepped into her white cotton panties. She knew I loved them on her, but I wasn't stupid enough to think the reason why she'd put them on had anything to do with me. Her breast with their perfect pink nipples swayed slightly as she pulled them into place. It would have been a lot easier if she'd already had clothes on.
Whatever. A snowsuit wouldn't stop you from checking her out. I shook off the idea of her body and got on with what I came to say.
Despite my best efforts to speak, I watched her for a few more moments. She ignored me, slipping into a t-shirt and a pair of sweat shorts. Once every article was in place she sat on the foot of her bed, her legs tucked on her body and then she looked up at me.
"So?"
I blinked, then switched to auto-pilot. "I –uh. I want to be with you."
Her eyebrows pulled together for moment while she looked down. Suddenly she stood up and started pulling off her shirt.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
"You wanna have sex, right? Just cutting through the first part."
I grabbed her arms quickly and pulled her shirt back down over her breasts. "No. That's not why I came up here. B, just – here sit down," I sighed, but I knew I deserved it. I had shown her no respect and no she was showing me just how that made her feel – like my slut.
She flopped back down on the bed, cross-legged again and peered at me. "Well."
"Shit. I'm sorry," I blurted.
"For what?" she asked.
"For everything."
"But what in particular? I mean are you sorry that you treated me like shit or are you sorry that we haven't slept together in two weeks. Cause if it's the sex - you can save your breath. We can fuck. I don't care."
I grimaced, feeling like the wind had been knocked out of me. "No, B. It's not about the sex at all. I'm sorry for – for pushing you away. I'm sorry for –" I had to be honest about what I had done. " – for using you. I'm sorry that I was too stubborn to just talk to you. I thought I was doing the right thing, but - I should've - I shouldn't have said you -"
"What?" Bella finally showed some emotion. She was pissed.
"Fuck I don't know. It was never your fault I wasn't talking. At first I thought if I was bitch to you, you wouldn't get to me, but you did. And then I thought if I let you in that would make things better, but it didn't. I –"
"God. You really aren't over her, are you?" she asked sincerely. It took me a second to realize what she meant though.
"Wait, you mean Emily?" I gasped.
"Uh, yeah I mean Emily. Who else would I mean?" she demanded.
"Jesus. I really fucked this up. B, I've been over Emily for months now." She didn't say anything, but her face was pleading. She hadn't begun to forgive me, not by a long shot, but now I could tell she wanted to listen. I sat down next to her on the bed, looking at my hands. "B, Emily is a fucking cunt."
She laughed then, ducking her head.
I smiled a little, but continued. We hadn't even scratched the surface. "She'd been acting shady for a long time. She'd stopped sleeping with us – all this shit. I don't know. She changed a lot."
"What you mean?" Bella asked quietly. That right there was why I felt the way I did for her. Here I was, owning up to being a complete shit head and she was still concerned for my feelings. I didn't deserve any part of her.
"I'm – not sure if Emily was ever who I thought she was. I don't think she ever actually loved me. I think she was insecure. You heard about the accident?"
"Yeah," she said with a small smirk. "Claire and Rachel told me."
"I figured the would. Cooking is like gossip foreplay for them." I tried not to let her laughter affect me. "I don't know. She was just so depressed after the accident and I was the only one who wasn't treating her differently and honestly I think she just liked the attention I gave her. When all that shit happened with Sam – I mean we left, but part of me just knew she would always take him back."
"Are you – are you mad she left you for a guy?" she asked hesitantly.
"No. What makes you say that?"
"Well I mean I know a lot of lesbians like yourself aren't really into the way us bi-girls still kinda fawn over guys. Like we're betraying the sisterhood or something."
I stared at her blankly.
"What?"
"B, I'm not a lesbian. I'm as bi as you and Alice."
"Alice is Bi?"
"Um yeah. You've seen that girl in action. She'd fuck anything and everything if Rose didn't have her hooks in her. She didn't tell you?"
"No. I just figured –"
"No Alice and I both like guys. We're just otherwise engaged at the moment."
"Oh well that is explains a lot. So you and Jake? You guys - I mean when he came to visit I saw you guys kissing," she admitted.
"Shit, you saw that?" I was gonna smack Jake next time I saw him.
"Yeah. You guys looked – uh, pretty into it. You being a lesbian would explain why you weren't with him anymore, but now I'm curious."
"Jake and I – I just never felt the same way he did. I love him so much and he'll always be my best friend. Its just him and all the guys on the Res, they're like brothers to me. If I ended up with any one of them it would be for our families. Not for each other."
"Oh, is that why you left?"
"Yes and no. My dad was getting pretty sick and I was trying to make some extra money to pay for his medication. God, that bitch," I muttered. "Emily too. Everyone coughed up all this money to pay for her medical treatment and shit. That's the main reason I was pissed at her. She started flaking out on jobs I'd gotten her and then she started going back to see Sam. She still owes my mom eight grand."
"Wow."
"But yeah. I'm over her. Trust me."
"But wait why were you upset about Emmett and Edward?"
"Well Rosalie straight up cheated with Emmett. Alice and I have been faithful and we were mad that she hadn't. Alice was pissed too, she just got over it faster. And Edward had his hand on your ass."
"Oh. So not mad about the guy thing and you're over Emily," she muttered to herself before she turned back to me. "Then why –"
My sigh cut her off. This was the part I was dreading. I dropped my head between my hands and geared up for my final confession. I took another deep breath, ready to shoot myself in the foot. I should have walked around the house one more time and said goodbye to all of the furniture before I came in here. After this I was going to have to move out.
"B, there's something you have to know about me. I hate being wrong."
"That doesn't surprise me," she said.
I laughed. "Yeah well. I really hate it and I was wrong about you." I waited a second before I continued. When I looked up Bella was just staring at me waiting for me to continue. "I wasn't sad about Emily leaving, but I was pissed off about the way she screwed us over. But I wasn't ready to start with anyone new. Honestly I would have been a cunt to anyone who moved in. I wasn't in the mood to be nice and I wasn't in the mood to be open."
"I see."
"But Rose and Alice were just as pissed and ready to move on, but you saw it. It's seven months later and I'm still dealing with Emily's ass."
"Yeah."
"I don't know though, with you. I – ha - I was so wrong. Rose was so confident that I would like you. Her and Alice showed me all your emails and texts and stuff. I just knew she was right, but I just –"
"You like being difficult?" I looked up to see her smirking at me.
"Pretty much. – I was fightin' it pretty good for a while too. Those two weeks before you got here, I had them convinced. Rose thought I was gonna stand on the porch waiting for you with a shot gun."
Bella laughed loudly. "You basically did."
I chuckled too. "I know. I'm sorry, really. I don't know - I convinced myself that even if you seemed cool via text or whatever, that didn't mean you would win me over in person, but that first night –" I looked back down again, closing my eyes.
The night was clear in my mind. Walking into Rosalie's room, thinking that I would simply grab her or Alice – I stood there frozen, just staring at Bella. Her lips pink and plump, her thick brown hair with its amber highlights spilled over the pillow. I could see how soft her skin was even in near darkness. I saw her and I was done for. I knew she could have that kind of power over me.
I turned my head slightly and looked Bella in the eye. "Do you understand how beautiful you are?" I said softly. She looked back at me, eyes wide. Clearly that wasn't what she was expecting me to say. But that was just the tip of the iceberg. Her beauty drew me to her, but her heart, her amazing ability to love us and take care of me and the girls, that was what did it for me. Bella was amazing.
And for months I had just been too stupid to tell her.
Suddenly I had the courage, the right courage to spit it all out. She had to know.
"I want to be with you."
"So be with me. Alice and Rose and I haven't changed. We're still here. We still want this to work," Bella giggled a little bit then. "Stop being an ass and just be with us."
"No, B. That's not what I mean. I want to be with you," I swallowed. It was now or never. "I want to be with you and just you."
Bella's eyes grew even wider and then she looked down. "Oh. Why didn't – you didn't you say something before?"
I tried to keep my frustration under control. This was seed of the problem. "B, this relationship is on fucking paper for Christ's sake. I know what it means to Rose and Alice and I knew if you signed that piece of paper AND stayed after the way I acted, hell I know what this relationship means to you. I was a class A dick to you and you still stayed. I thought if I came clean I would fuck up everything for everyone."
Finally the recognition flickered across her face. She looked down again, playing with her fingernails. I was nervous about what she would say, but it would have been stupid of me to expect her to just be okay with my admission as if this conversation would undo the past six months.
"What about the girls?" she whispered. I didn't know exactly what she meant, but I had to be honest.
"I love them, but I mean I saw part of what Emily's issue was with the situation. I can't be with three people for the rest of my life. Even if the shit was legal. It's fun, don't get me wrong, but balancing three girlfriends is hard."
"Yeah, I get that I guess." Her voice was still low. She was still thinking. "Why me?"
I shrugged. I hadn't anticipated that she would actually want me to put those feelings into words, so i said the first thing that came to mind. "Honestly. I don't know. It just is. Maybe it's because you didn't leave. You gave your word so you stayed. You fell for Rose and Alice so you stayed. I was so awful to you and you still took care of me. I mean I love them, but even Rose doesn't have your persistence."
"It's cause I stood up to you," she said confidently. And that was it. I loved the girls for all the same reasons I loved Bella. They were sweet and kind and giving. Rose could be a bitch, but always with the intention of keeping the peace. Bella didn't give a shit.
"No one has ever thrown the phrase 'Fuck You' at me and walked away from the situation," I admitted. Bella smiled wide, then, very proud of herself. I shook my head laughing at her. "That's it. It's easy for me to walk over people –not that I mean to, but you wouldn't put up with my shit."
"Not all of the time, anyway." Her face dropped again. We both remembered then why we were having this conversation in the first place. "I have to think about it, okay?"
"Okay," I said slowly.
"I -," she sighed, getting ready to offer up her own confession. "You know how I feel. It's just – you really hurt me." It was amazing how she could confirm my greatest hopes and fears in the same sentence. "I want to, but I just can't trust you right now."
"I know," I whispered, picking up her hand. I was glad she didn't yank it away. I looked at her soft fingers. As nervous as she was with her fidgeting, they were always perfectly manicured. I wondered if it came naturally or if Alice and Rose had some sort of influence on her in that department. Maybe if I hadn't been such a bitch, I'd know. "I am sorry."
"I believe you. We'll just play it by ear for now, okay?"
"Kay." It was the best response I could hope for. Bella still loved me and she'd actually given me a chance to tell her how I felt. Knowing it was time to leave well enough alone, I stood up to leave. I could have spent the whole day sitting there, looking at her, but I'd just dumped a bunch of crap at her feet. I figured she'd want some time alone.
"Um I'll be around – so you know if you get bored and want to go to a movie or something," I said in a weak attempt to leave that door open.
"Okay," she replied quietly. She looked down again, examining her nail beds. I took that as my cue to leave, but just before I reached the door, she stopped me.
"Leah."
I turned just in time to see Bella come towards me. She wasn't in a hurry, but she had a clear destination. Her arms wrapped around my waist and I pulled her closer. She nuzzled her face into my neck and I buried my face into her hair, drowning in her fresh scent.
We held each other for a long time and for the first time in a long time I felt like I was breathing. The tightness in my chest, the kind that clamped down on my heart every time Bella walked into the room, was loosened. In its place I just felt peace and warmth. I'd wait as long as she wanted if it meant she chose me. And if she didn't I would treasure everyday we spent together until our lives pulled us apart.
"I find it a little odd that we have the same middle name," I said softly. Not that Marie was all that uncommon, but still.
"If you make me think of my dad and your mom while we're standing here like this - I will kick your ass," she replied.
I laughed. "Sorry."
We were quiet for a few more minutes. I was enjoying the weight of her in my arms, loving her soft breath on me, when she spoke again.
"I'm sorry Emily hurt you," she whispered.
"I'm not," I told her honestly.
"Really?" She looked up at me for a moment.
"Yeah. Then I never would have met you."
"Well that's not entirely true. Our parents are dating," she teased, giggling a little bit. With the mood lightened a bit, I began to stroke her hair. She seemed like it. She snuggled closer, nuzzling my collarbone.
"Emmett and I are cool, now, by the way. He helped me beat up James," I told her.
Her head whipped up and she just stared at me for a moment before tucking her cheek back into my shoulder. I went back to stroking her hair, my left hand smoothing it down her back. She let out a deep breath and relaxed further in my arms.
A few minutes later she spoke again. "I like it when you call me B," she whispered. I kissed the top of her, having nothing to say. I'd called her B to piss her off, but the term of endearment had now become special to the both of us.
I couldn't say how long we stood there in her room, but holding her like that was incredibly soothing. Part of me wanted to just lay her down for a long nap, but I was determined to let her call the shots from now on.
As if she read my mind, Bella's hands began to trail down the small of my back. She had to know what kind of affect she had on me. I held still, trembling on the inside, trying not to get my hopes ups.
She pulled away a little, just enough to see my face. "Will you kiss me?" she whispered softly.
Bella and I had kissed plenty of times over the past couple of months. In all the times our lips had come together I had never let myself really enjoy it. I was always guarded and also calculating. Even the first time I kissed Bella in the bathroom, I'd kissed her with the intent of bringing her to her knees and making her want me.
This time I wanted her to feel just how much she meant to me.
I moved painfully slow, wrapping the fingers on my left hand around the perfect curve of her neck. Her deep brown eyes followed my lips as hers parted, a small breath of anticipation escaping.
Just before our lips touched a few simple words slipped out. I meant them and they just had to be said. They came out soft and extremely low. And even if she didn't hear me she did see the few tears that ran down my cheek. Part tears of joy, part guilt and shame. Either way I told her one last bit of truth.
"I missed you."
"I missed you, too," she whispered in reply. Bella pulled back, but just a little, and gently wiped my cheek. I did not deserve her, but I hoped with this kiss would begin to change her mind about me.
My eyes slid closed and I slowly pressed my lips to hers. A slow advance and retreat, our mouths brushing together, our heads slowly tilting from side to side. I'd missed the softness of her lips, the gentle teasing of her tongue, the hint of strawberry lip-gloss. Something she'd picked up from Rose. All of things were never mine to begin with, but I loved them.
And then there was that moment where everything shifted. And all of those things I loved began making my pussy extremely wet. I was just glad Bella was letting me hold her. I was down right giddy that she was letting me kiss her. I was enjoying simply being close to her, but then she slipped her tongue into my mouth. Her hands found their way up my shirt, gently caressing the small of my back. Bella didn't go any higher, but that didn't stop my body from reacting. I wanted her. Bad.
I felt like a horny teenage boy. I couldn't help it. I knew how beautiful and soft her body was underneath her clothes. I had enjoyed kissing it and touching it, a lot. I also was confident in Bella's ability to please me, using that body.
The wall I had put up hadn't kept us from getting to know each other physically. I paid close attention to how she liked to be kissed, how she liked to be touched. I'd been such a shit for such a long time, if she would let it go that far, I would take everything I knew about her body to make her come. And I would take everything I knew about Bella to make her feel just how much I loved her.
Bella took a step back, breaking our connection, but not for long. My eyes flitted open as she grabbed my hand and started walking backwards towards the bed. She had that look in her eye, that same look she had when she was getting off fingering herself for me, the same look she had right before she licked her lips and told me the dirty thing she wanted me to do her.
The horny teen in me took over. I slid my hands under shirt, gently palming her sides, drawing my thumbs across her ribs. She shuddered, her eyes closing a bit before she looked up at me again. I swallowed the lust rising in my throat. She'd tell me or show me what she wanted. She always did.
Bella slowly licked her bottom lip and said, "I want to ride your pussy." My hands slid a little further up, my thumbs dragging across the tight tips of her nipples. Her eyes closed again and she moaned a little. I could tell she was just as wet as I was.
All efforts to be polite went out the window. "Can I taste you first?"
"Mmmhmmm," she nodded, biting her lip.
We paced ourselves, but there was urgency in every movement we made. Her shirt came off quickly and so did mine, but we didn't rush as we continued kissing and touching.
She sat down on the bed in front of me and I sank to my knees. She watched my every move, lifting her butt off the bed so I could pull off her shorts and her panties. I gazed in awe at what was revealed, like I was seeing it for the first time.
Bella had the most beautiful cunt I had ever seen. Rose and Alice weren't far behind, but Bella's pussy, so soft and plump and cream with the barest hint of pink, it was just aching to be touched, kissed, adored. I wasn't gentle while I feasted on her pussy, sucking on her perfect lips, but I took my time, fingering her hard and deep just the way she liked it.
Bella didn't like to come quickly, one thing Alice and Rose never picked up on. She liked to draw any orgasm out, like the sheer torture of it all made her gush even more. I alternated using just my lips, just my fingers or just my tongue, letting her squirm and moan on the bed above.
My nipples brushed up against the quilt in between her legs and I became slightly more frantic. Dedicated to using just my mouth now, my fingers drifted down to my own clit. A muffled whimpered escaped against Bella's skin as I started to rub myself, pretending my hand was hers.
Then she moaned. "Leah - honey - fuck me." I didn't exactly see a point in waiting. I rose to my feet and Bella quickly pulled herself to the center of the bed, sitting up right. I knew from the position she took, what she wanted.
After a few quick seconds of maneuvering, Bella and I were face to face, breast to breast, our legs intertwined, our wet pussies slowly massaging each other. I'd never held her so close before and I never wanted to let her go.
Between our eager kisses an odd thought popped into my head. I had no confirmation of the facts, but I had to know.
"Seriously, how good is your Spanish?" I panted, before I went to licking my way down her neck. I didn't break the steady rhythm of our bodies grinding together.
"Pretty good. Just a bit better than yours," she replied – in perfect Spanish. She giggled, then gasped as I started sucking on her nipple. That was all that was said between us. So many things raced through my mind, my heart breaking over and over, overwhelmed by the way I was coming to realize I truly felt about her.
Every time she came against my body, I wanted her more.
Hours later, we finally stopped for good, having explored every inch of each other's bodies. The sun had gone down and we were both starving, but too tired, or too lazy or maybe too content to move. Rose and Alice were home, but Bella didn't seem to care, so I didn't bring it up. I just held her, her plump little ass pressed into my lap.
I knew a bit of how I had made Bella feel that night. Yes, she had listened to me and yes we had made love, but I didn't know how she would react to me in the morning, if she would still want me around. And that terrified me. All four of us had laid together like this, many times before, but I had held Bella like this and still managed to treat her badly.
She drifted off to sleep in my arms, after a while, rolling towards me and cuddling further into my embrace. I watched her sleep, toughing her swollen lips lightly with my fingers, grazing the soft skin of her back. I'd never felt so whole and so scared. I didn't want the night to end.
I wanted to be with her like this, just the two of us, always. I would keep my mouth shut, I decided, put this situation truly in Bella's hands. I prayed that she would some day be able to trust me again, that she would see just how much I loved her. I hoped that she could look at me the way I had been wanting her to all along. But I knew I had to wait. Bella was decisive, but never hasty. I knew eventually she would come to a decision.
And she did. A lot sooner than I had anticipated.
i dont think its ever been this hard for me to post a chapter. 4 of my favorite people were chatting to me. ghostbusters was on and then hung and then entourage and then i got thirsty.
soooo. im interested to see what u guys think of this chapter. its the only you'll get from leah, but i hope it didnt disappoint. she does love the shit out of bella for real.
in addition to the title track, Alone by Heart also goes well with this chapter. i think.
oh i have only gotten one question about all 14 of my stories. you guys are making this last AN im planning really easy on me. :)