The sunlight streamed through the cracks in the curtains, splaying light over the bare surface of Blaine's skin. Kurt's breath hitched at the beauty of his deceivingly still form, still in pretend-sleep. He suspected he wanted to avoid the awkward morning after talk…

And yet, Kurt didn't feel awkward. He didn't feel empty… he felt as if there was something new inside of him. Growing…

Was this what love really was?

He traced his fingers over the light dust of dark hair on Blaine's back. He was tired of staying silent. He longed to hear Blaine's deep, familiar voice… even if he was going to tell him something he didn't want to hear.

"Blaine," he whispered softly when Blaine didn't move. "Blaine, I know you're awake."

Slowly, Blaine rolled over, his gold eyes boring into his.

"Hi," Kurt breathed.

"Hi."

The hall outside was starting to buzz with students going about their usual Saturday business. It was past ten, so they were slowly waking up, probably heading down to breakfast in the dining hall.

"Wes will be back soon," Blaine noted, absently playing with Kurt's fingers.

"Do you want me to leave?" Kurt asked carefully, hoping for the no that he knew wouldn't come.

"I-I," Blaine faltered. Kurt nodded gravely, untangling himself from Blaine's warm body. "No, Kurt," Blaine whined, grabbing for him again, "don't go. Not yet."

"Not yet?" Kurt raised an eyebrow. Blaine let out a sigh and fell back against the pillows in frustration.

"It's not like that," Blaine protested. "I really care about you, Kurt."

Kurt's heart fluttered at the declaration, despite the fear that his next words were going to break his heart.

"I don't know anything about relationships," Blaine continued, his eyes wide and full of a puppy like sincerity. "Hell, I've had nothing to know from. My own father-" he paused and Kurt wondered if he had been on the edge of a confession. "I don't know how to be in a relationship, Kurt."

"Neither do I," Kurt offered. "You've had more experience than I have…"

"And look how that turned out," Blaine said darkly. "Look, Kurt…" he sighed. "I'm not… I'm not ready to be in a real relationship. I…I don't want to hurt you."

Kurt's eyes glistened with unshed tears as he drunk in Blaine's words. He had been right. Blaine wasn't ready for this. And it wasn't right for him to expect him to be.

"Too late," he whispered. He got to his feet, quickly dressing himself as Blaine watched on mutely, his eyes large and sad as he grasped at the absent thoughts in his mind, trying to think of something more to say.

No words came.

"Goodbye, Blaine," Kurt said softly, not even able to look him in the eye as he walked out.

Well, if this is what love feels like, it's not really worth it, Kurt thought bitterly as the door slammed behind him, effectively breaking whatever stupid spell he had been under. God, why was he so stupid?

The worst part was that he couldn't even blame Blaine. He couldn't even hate him.

It was his own freaking fault.

~.~

Breaking the news to everybody had been harder than Kurt had thought. In spite of everything, he had made some pretty good friends in the hallowed halls of the academy.

But there was no way he could be sorry to leave.

At lunch time he tracked down Wes.

"Hey, Warbler Kurt," he greeted him brightly as he slipped into the plastic seat beside him. "I heard the news… congratulations."

"Thank you, Wes," Kurt said sincerely. "I know it's a weekend, but is there any chance you could organise a quick Warblers meeting… I just… I wanted to say thank you."

Wes clapped a hand firmly on his shoulder. "Of course," he said. "I think they'd all want a chance to say goodbye."

Kurt nodded, looking up just in time to see a flicker of black leather fleeing the cafeteria. He swallowed the lump in his throat.

A chance to say goodbye…

~.~

One good thing about Wes…

He always delivered.

The Warblers were gathered in the choir room by three and Kurt was addressing them at four past. The Warblers were all eyeing him curiously as he stood before them; an impressive figure in his classic black skinny jeans, yellow pea coat and matching boots. He didn't smile as he addressed them.

And he most definitely did not look in Blaine's direction.

…more than three times.

"Warblers," Kurt began, impressed at the steady pace he managed despite his messy emotions. "I'm sure you're wondering why Wes called this meeting… some of you probably have heard by now… but for those of you who don't know, I'm leaving Dalton and returning back to my own school."

Murmurs filled the choir room at that. Apparently they hadn't heard…

Kurt cleared his throat, regaining their attention. "So, thank you Warblers, for everything you have done for me these past two months. I'll…" he couldn't exactly say "miss you"…

And yet, Kurt had an odd feeling that he probably would miss them. He had gotten used to the hallowed halls of Dalton Academy; to Trent's fashionable broaches, to Jeff's sunny laugh, to Nick's amusing stories, to Wes's business like demeanour and the constant presence of his loyal sidekick David.

But most of all he'd miss Blaine; those sparkling amber eyes that spoke millions, his murmurs of Italian nothings that Kurt could never quite understand but still made him blush.

The way he looked at him.

The way he made him feel.

The way he had held him and loved him the night before.

"I'll miss you," Kurt finally said, his eyes on the floor, avoiding the gold eyes he was thinking of. "So this is my little good bye present for you."

Wes gave him a nod of approval, pressing play on the radio, sitting back as the opening notes of the tune began to pour through the speakers. Kurt sighed deeply, drinking in the melody before opening his mouth to sing.

"This is really hard…" he whispered. "If I look like I'm sweating, well… it's because I am."

The boys chuckled and Kurt ducked his head to the floor, closing his eyes and letting the music flow through him.

"I'm not good with words," he sang quietly. "But that's nothing new. Still I have to try and explain what I want to do. With you. With you…"

He opened his eyes and lifted them to meet Blaine's softly.

"Runaway with me"

He saw Blaine's breath catch, his eyes glistening with mixed emotions as Kurt tunred away, singing to all of them, but allowing his gaze to flicker back to Blaine's occasionally just so he'd know.

So he'd know this song was for him.

Let me be your ride out of town

Let me be the place that you hide

We can make our lives on the go

Run away with me

All the other Warblers smiled up at him appreciatively. David had his head tilted to the side with interest and Wes was beaming happily. Nick was swaying in time with the music, nudging his shoulder with Jeff's, trying to get him into it too.

I'm not trying to make you a wife here,

I'm not trying to tie you down.

I'm just saying there may be a life here

A new one as soon as we run,

Just as soon as we run.

Run away

Taking a step forward, Kurt surged into the song, singing with all the passion and love he could muster. He needed to be like Adam – he needed to put himself, his whole heart on the line with just this song. He hadn't been able to say it… but maybe he could sing it.

Let me be your ride out of town.

Let me be the place that you hide.

We can make our lives on the go.

Run away with me.

Mississippi mud – watch me slide.

We'll be on the road like Jack Kerouac, looking back

Sam, you're ready, Sam

Let me be your ride out of town.

Run away with me.

California dreams here we come

Romeo is calling for Juliet

Ready, set, Sam, you're ready, let's go

Anywhere

Say the word and I'm already there!

He let the note hang in the air for a moment, bright tears glistening against his lashes. Sniffling a little, he wiped his eyes before turning his gaze to Blaine who was holding back tears of his own.

Closing his eyes briefly, Kurt whispered the last line sadly.

Run away with me

The Warblers applause burst enthusiastically over the hall and Kurt allowed them all a small smile, meeting their hugs, high fives and well wishes as they departed the hall.

As expected, Blaine was the last to leave, trailing behind wistfully. His eyes were dark as they met Kurt's and all of a sudden Kurt knew everything. He knew Blaine loved him just as much as he loved him. But there was something missing.

"I'm sorry, Kurt," Blaine whispered. "So, so sorry."

Kurt nodded slowly. "I know-"

"No, you don't," Blaine shook his head. "But you will." He pulled out a sealed envelope from his jean pocket and presented it to Kurt. "I want you to understand, Kurt."

Kurt nodded. It was all he could do for a large lump had climbed up his throat, rendering him speechless.

"I'll see you around, bella," Blaine uttered, his voice sounding broken, even as he tried to muster a steady voice.

Kurt smiled weakly at him, waving slightly as his footsteps echoed down the hall, the resounding thud of the hall door silencing them.

And just like that he was gone.