The Very Secret Diary of Severus Snape
Chapter 4
Dear Fluffy
It is now 7:50. Only ten minutes before the ball begins and I've got everything ready. The potion is complete and I've put an illusion on the horn so it looks like one of the goblets.
I'm starting to have a few second thoughts about this. I'm not entirely sure what the actual effects of the potion are, so I have no idea what will happen when James drinks it. For all I know, it could be a cupid's arrow type thing and he'll fall for the first person he sees, which could very easily be a teacher or anyone. Maybe even Lily and I'm not sure that I'm okay with that consequence. There's also the extremely likely possibility of everything going terribly wrong. I want James to like me, but it won't be worth it if I screw everything up.
There's no time for second thoughts now. It's already 7:56 and I need to start heading down if I'm going to go through with this. I've been planning and preparing for over a month. I have to go through with this. I can't let all my hard work go to waste.
7:58. I'm dressed up (and I look hideous. Seriously, Mother? A light lavender robe with long frills? You do know I'm male, right?) and I have the horn/goblet in my cloak. Now all I need to do is set my plan in motion and hope for the best.
-Severus
Carefully, Snape placed his journal under his pillow, resituating everything to make it look as if nothing were out of the ordinary. Giving himself one last glance over, Severus left the dungeons, walking towards the Great Hall and the Halloween celebrations. By the time he got there, the Hall was already teeming with excited students. Carefully, Severus placed the horn and cast the final spell, ensuring that James would be the only one to take it.
Snape decidedly took his station leaning against the wall so he could see where the horn sat. He watched as every other student in Hogwarts laughed and danced, almost wishing he could join them. But no. Even his own house despised him. They watched and laughed with the rest of the school when Potter and Black tortured him, albeit this had lessened since the breakup. Lucius was the only one who had ever stood by him.
Severus shook himself, refusing to dwell on the past. Right now he had to stay alert and keep his eyes on Potter, not mope in the corner like a pms-ing woman. He had one friend, and that was all he needed.
"Propping up the wall as usual, I see." Giving him a genuine smile, Lucius walked up to Severus and took the empty spot next to him. Snape smiled weakly, debating on whether or not he should be angry and deciding against it. 'Speak of the devil.'
"You've managed to escape Narcissa. Or did you not ask your lovely betrothed to this quaint little gathering."
Lucius snorted. "My lovely betrothed… there's something I'll never quite get used to. No, I came quite alone, although I expect she'll find me sooner or later." He grimaced, then stole a quick look at Snape. "Nice to see you're responsive today. You okay? You've been completely spacey since we came back."
Snape remained quiet, not sure how to respond. "I've just… had a lot on my mind lately."
"Care to elaborate?"
Severus Shook his head. "Not yet. I'll tell you, just… not yet," he said, hoping his friend would understand.
Lucius nodded, content that he'd find out eventually. "Well, until you decide to share your life story with me, would you care to dance?" Lucius turned to face him, a bemused look on his face. "We'll create quite a stir. Things have been way to dull around here since Potter and Evans broke up, I'm sad to say. And it's not as if you'll be associating with our fellow students."
Severus laughed. "A tempting offer, but no thank you. Besides, I smell a cloud of bad perfume coming our way, and I think it's looking for you." Pointing towards the wandering Narcissa, he laughed even harder as his best friend went rigid and melted into the crowd and away from his pursuer.
Severus looked back over at Potter and his friends, checking to see if James had taken the potion yet. No suck luck. James and Sirius were standing in the corner, talking between themselves. Then, much to Snape's pleasure, James walked away just long enough to grab two drinks from the table, including the disguised potion. But of course, all good plans have their flaws. Instead of keeping it for himself, james gave Sirius the goblet with the potion, keeping the normal one for himself. Snape could only look on in horror as Black downed the potion that was meant for James. Once the potion was finished, Black said something to James before rushing off. 'Probably the potion taking effect.' James stood there by himself, looking lonely and almost depressed. Snape continued to watch him, fighting the urge to walk up to the object of his affection.
Then James perked up, wary. Both him and Snape watched as Lily, who seemed as if she were waiting for James to be alone, emerged from the crowd. She walked up to James, whispered something into his ear, then grabbed his hand and forcibly led him out. The whole time, James looked suspicious, wondering if he should be letting her lead him out.
Snape gaped. Jealousy boiling over, he followed James and Evans out of the Great hall, crouching in a shadow where he could hear but not be seen.
"James, please!" Lily was on her knees, holding James's hand and looking up at him, tears pouring down. "Please take me back James. I love you!"
Severus watched James recoil, obviously uneasy. "Lily, if you love me so much, then why did you cheat on me." His voice was dead and uncaring.
"But James…"
James snatched his hand away and yelled. "You're having Zabini's child!"
For the third time that evening, Snape stood there, completely dumbfounded. 'I was told they got into a silly fight. No one ever said anything about an affair, much less a child.'
Unable to look him in the face, Lily bent her head down, letting her tears plop on the stone floor. "Please. I need you. I'll die without you."
"You will not."
Lily sat there, unmoving, then gave a harsh bark of laughter. She stood up and pulled out her wand. "Yes, I will. And you will too. We need each other James. I'll kill you, and then I'll follow after." James stared at Lily as if she was mad, and at the moment, her sanity was truly up for question. "We'll be like Romeo and Juliet." Smiling, she raised her wand, ready to cast the spell. "Avad-"
"Stupefy!" Severus cried, jumping out of his shadow and aiming his wand at Lily's chest in one fluid motion. Both men watched her collapse, her wand stopping in front of Potter's feet. James looked up at Severus, stunned, not quite sure what had just occurred. Severus just gazed at him coolly, refusing to show how shaken he truly was. "I suggest you take that," he pointed at Lily, "to the infirmary. Though I'd probably drop her off the highest tower after what she just did, I'm sure you want to see her relatively safe. When she comes around, perhaps she'll be somewhat sane."
James looked at him quizzically. "Why did you help me?"
Snape shrugged. "Call it payback for helping me with Lockhart." He turned around and started walking away. "I'm going to bed. This evening's been an utter disaster and I'm ready for it to be over.
"Wait!" Severus turned around, meeting James's eyes. "Thank you…."
Snape nodded. He started off, but stopped one more time. "Nobody will know about this, you realize." He looked over his shoulder, smirking. "I can't have people thinking I fancy you, now can I. Over-inflated ego and all that." Snape nodded and walked off, making sure his new blush couldn't be seen and leaving behind a grinning James.
Severus managed to make it all the way back to the Slytherin common room before collapsing.
"Ugh! This didn't work out at all! Black drank the potion and James was almost killed." Severus took in a deep breath, letting the air out slowly. He pulled himself off the floor, leaning on a plush chair for support. "I'm going to bed, now, before something else goes wrong." He dragged himself to his dorm, stopping as he took hold of the door. He could hear movement on the other side of the door, accompanied by two voices and faint moans. Wondering what was going on, he slowly turned the doorknob and opened the door, completely unprepared for what he was about to see.
Laying on his bed, HIS bed, were Lucius Malfoy and Sirius Black. Arms legs, and lips were entangled together as the two rolled each other over. Snape stood there, wide eyed, too stunned and disturbed to say or do anything at first. After the initial shock, his face turned red and he shook with fury.
"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU DOING IN MY BED?"
Two chapters in two days! I feel awesome. Actually… my internet and cable decided to go out, so I worked on a chapter while watching Slayers. Good night :D
Okay, so 4 chapters down, 2 to go, then new content. Excited? I am :D Hope everyone is liking the revisions. Chapter 5 will be out soon. Thank you for your support. Comments and critiques welcome as always. And here are the links to the other places
sincerusamor . blogspot . com
sincerusamor . tumblr . com